Shanji. Part 3

The inside of the tent was orange in the glow of the fire outside. Ma undressed her and slid her beneath a blanket of wool. She leaned close, and Kati reached up to touch her face and lips. "Your face-the way it was for a while today-it scared me."

Ma smiled, stroked her cheek. "I am Tumatsin, and the Hansui call us changelings because our faces become fierce when we are frightened or very angry. It's just the way we are, Kati. It will be the way you are when you become a woman."

"Were you frightened or angry today?" Kati yawned again, eyelids drooping.

"No. Today was difficult. I had to think of something that made me angry a long time ago, and then hold that thought for hours. It was very tiring, but now it's over, and I can have fun the rest of festival." Kati felt herself slipping away. "I will ride Sushua," she murmured, "and see the burning cave again, and hear all the things people ask for there."

"The people must be shouting their prayers," said Ma.

Kati's eyes were nearly closed. "No," she said, tapping her own forehead with a finger, "I hear

them-here."

In the last instant before sleep, it seemed that Ma had suddenly leaned closer to her.

And that night, she dreamed a recurring dream of a night sky filled with purple stars.

Everyone was up at first light to cook their barley cakes over the embers of the bonfire and drink tea. There was no procession to the festival field, people climbing to it after their ch.o.r.es were finished and stopping only briefly at the burning cave. Kati heard no prayers this time and went straight to Sushua, who recognized and nuzzled her. She fed her gra.s.s, and a smuggled barley cake, and then Da lifted her up.

"You can only ride a little while. Today is for the boys and the men to show their riding skills. There will be many games for them."

Kati lived in the moment, first walking, trotting, then galloping Sushua round and around the circle. But it seemed such a short time before Da came to lift her off. She had to take Sushua away from the field to a little pasture beyond the tents, rubbing down her coat with bunches of gra.s.s and curry-combing her, and then leaving her there with the other horses.

The rest of the morning she ate bread, and cheese, and five pieces of yijin while the boys showed off on the field. Their hair was braided, and they went s.h.i.+rtless to show their muscles to the older girls who giggled and pointed from the sidelines. There were races: short sprints back and forth, one with many turns among tall poles stuck in the gra.s.s, another with the riders actually standing on the backs of their horses. Abaka, from her own ordu, was a fine rider, and made a great impression. Kati saw many girls pointing at him, and whispering among themselves.

After the boys were finished showing off, Kati got to ride Sushua again, then there was more eating and music: lutes and horns, drums and cymbals, a great crash of noise, and people began dancing to it, twirling and kicking, men picking up the nearest woman and spinning madly with her. Da and Ma did it too, Ma's arms around Da's neck as he twirled her round and round, and when they stopped they were kissing.

But after the dancing, things seemed to become more serious.

The men went out to the field with re-curved bows and quivers full of arrows, and shot at man-shaped straw dummies hanging from poles. The boys reappeared and did the same while the men were preparing their mounts, then drummers came to line the field. When the drums began pounding, everyone was suddenly silent, and the men charged onto the field on horseback, circling round and around and firing at the dummies from horseback. After each pa.s.s, the dummies bristled with stuck arrows.

Ma disappeared again, and soon Kati saw her mounted with the regalia of the previous day, but her face was normal. Her sword was in a scabbard at her side, and she was smiling. She and the other mounted women drew up in a line, and the men crowded in behind her, horses jostling together in excitement.

The drums pounded harder, and women in the crowd began trilling, a sound that always thrilled Kati. And then Ma drew her sword, pointing down the length of the field, and she uttered a shrill cry that raised the hair at the back of Kati's neck.

The horses leapt forward and charged down the field, Ma's sword outstretched, the men screaming, the women trilling, fanning out at the end of the field, and charging back again. Three times they did this, and each time the noise seemed to get louder, until Kati clapped her hands over her ears. Finally, it was over, the men rea.s.sembling in the center of the field, the mounted women unsheathing their swords one last time and saluting the crowd before putting their swords back in their scabbards with a metallic crash in unison.

And then, quite suddenly, everyone was laughing again and there was music. Ma dismounted before their tent, and pulled off the heavy, colorful robe, under which she wore her leathers. Her face glistened with sweat. She unbuckled her sword, handed it to Kati. "Hold this a moment."

The sword, in its scabbard, was heavy, longer than Kati's body. The blade was curved, hilt and pommel in bra.s.s. Kati held it as a precious thing, lifted it up to Ma when she asked for it. Ma put it in the tent with the robe. But Kati did not forget the feel of that sword in her hand.

The atmosphere was light again, and the weapons were put away in the tents. Kati rode Sushua for nearly two hours while the adults laid out blankets covered with trading goods from the various ordus and spent a happy afternoon of trading and gossip. It would have been a purely wonderful day except for two things that happened.

The first occurred mid-afternoon, when someone first heard a distant whine and shouted for quiet. The whine grew louder, then a woman pointed east and cried, "Flyer!" Kati was trotting Sushua, and saw the silvery craft coming towards her at low alt.i.tude. She ignored it, and kept riding. People were scurrying around, picking up a few remaining bows and arrow quivers, and getting them into the tents. They looked up sullenly as the craft pa.s.sed overhead, and some shook their fists. Kati watched their faces, and saw anger there. The craft pa.s.sed over one more time, and again headed east, leaving the crowd muttering. Kati felt the tension of the people around her, and didn't like it. The festival was supposed to be fun, and adults could be so serious, she thought.

But it was the second incident that really bothered her, a confrontation with her mother that left her shocked and bewildered. One minute, Ma was happy and smiling, and the next she was dragging Kati painfully into the tent with her eyes blazing red.

Ma was talking to Manlee and two other women, and Kati was watching an older boy and girl nearby. The girl was smiling shyly, lowering her eyes as the boy leaned close to whisper in her ear. Kati was shocked at a sudden thought, and without thinking, tugged at her mother's leathers. Ma leaned down, and Kati whispered in her ear.

"That boy over there is so excited. He thinks the girl will go to the trees with him, and take off her clothes. Should he be thinking like-" Ma's fingernails bit into her arm, and the tent was only steps away. Her little legs couldn't move fast enough to keep up, and Ma dragged her part of the way. Baber was in the tent, sound asleep. Ma dropped to her knees before Kati, grasped her arms hard, and her eyes were blazing red.

"How do you know such a thing? Are you making this up?"

Kati was stunned. "I-no, Ma, I could hear him. He likes the girl, and wants her to go with him."

"You could not hear him at that distance. Are you saying this for attention? I've told you about lying, Kati."

"I'm not lying," said Kati. I heard him thinking it, Ma. No, not really heard-" Kati paused, uncertain about her explanation. "I heard it here, Ma, but not words. I just knew what he wanted." She tapped her forehead. "Ma, you're hurting my arm! What's wrong?"

Ma's red eyes were inches from her face, her breath hot in a whisper. "You imagine you can hear a thought, but only a Searcher can do that, and you are not a Searcher. You are Tumatsin! To pry into a mind is an evil thing! To talk about it is even worse! If you imagine you hear a thought you will block it out as a false thing, and say nothing! Do you understand?"

Kati nodded, but her chest ached, and she felt tears welling up in her eyes, for she was now truly frightened.

"I'm not evil, Ma, but I do hear things. I do!"

Ma shook her roughly. "NO! It is your imagination! It was meeting the Searcher on the trail. They are evil people, Kati! You must not want to be like them in any way!"

Kati began to cry. "I'm not bad, Ma!" And then she was sobbing bitterly. "I'm not bad! I'm not!" she wailed.

Ma's eyes suddenly gushed tears. She pulled Kati to her, kissed her cheek, hugged her.

"Oh Kati, I don't want to hurt you! But promise me you will block out these thoughts you have, and never, ever talk about them. People won't understand. They will think you evil, like the Searchers. Please, Kati, do what I say."

"I will, Ma, I will, I promise." Kati sniffled, and put her arms around Ma's neck, and Ma rocked her back and forth silently for a long moment. And then they dried their eyes, and Ma took her outside again.

The festival continued gaily for the rest of the day, but Kati did not want to be near people. She went to the pasture and found Sushua and led her back to the field, where one of the boys helped her get mounted. She rode her horse, alone, round and around the circle until it was time to eat, but still she rode. Da finally came out with two barley cakes for her, thinking she was having too much fun to eat, and very happy she loved his gift so much. He did not say this, yet she heard it. Was hearing Da's nice thoughts also an evil thing?

Out on the field, away from people, there were no thoughts, only the wind in her face and Sushua's warm body beneath her. How could Ma think she would imagine such things and then talk out loud about it? The thoughts only came when people were close, like the Searcher on the trail. He hadn't been surprised-or had he? He'd looked at her curiously. The thoughts just came. How could she stop them?

At dark she had to stop riding. Da let her stay with Sushua in the pasture for a while, because she said she wanted to. The music was loud, and much ayrog was flowing. Away from people her mind was clear. Sushua had no thoughts; she just wanted to eat. Kati rubbed the little horse down while she was filling her belly, and hugged her often before Ma came to get her.

They were near the end of the line going back to camp, and Manlee was again standing by the burning cave, urging the prayers of the people. It made Kati angry that the woman didn't believe her own words. Tengri's Eye was just a fire deep inside a cave, and the old woman didn't believe the ancestors were ever coming back. Still, she looked again at the bright glow inside the maw of the cave, felt its hot breath, and closed her eyes.

The emerald green eyes were suddenly there again, slanted upwards, pupils black as night, and the sight of them seemed calming. The chatter inside her head was suddenly gone, and she felt warmed all over as if an arm had just gone around her shoulders, like when she was with Da. She felt a presence, a connection with something outside herself. Suddenly, she felt protected.

Kati stumbled on the trail, eyes tightly closed. Ma squeezed her hand. Please don't leave me! Kati wanted to say to the eyes. Keep the thoughts away. But she had to open her eyes to avoid falling down, and she saw Ma, whom she loved and tried to obey in all things.

She sat up for only a short time, and went to bed with Baber, the tent's interior brightly lit by the glow of the bonfire raging outside. She closed her eyes tightly, but the image of the green eyes was gone. Exhausted from the day, she quickly fell asleep.

And was awakened much later by a sound of sobbing in the now darkened tent. Soft, and sad, it went on for a long time, from where Ma and Da were sleeping. Someone stirred.

"Toregene, what is the matter?"

A sniffle. "The strain of the day, I suppose. The children are exhausted, and so am I. I'm ready to go home. Temujin, do you love me?"

"Of course I do. You and the children are my life. What a thing to ask!"

"Then hold me, Temujin. Hold me-love me."

From then on the sounds Kati heard were familiar ones, the sounds Ma and Da made as they often pleasured each other in their ger beyond the mountains. Suddenly, Kati wanted to go home, to that place across the mountains, where it would be quiet again.

People slept later the next morning, and some of the men seemed grumpy when they arose. They cooked their cakes over the coals in the great pit by the pool, and then the tents were struck and people were talking and sitting on the mounds of their possessions while the boys went up to the fields to retrieve the horses. Gifts were being exchanged among old and new friends, and Kati was surprised when Edi came up to her and handed her something wrapped in a piece of soft leather.

"I wish we could ride together, but your ordu is so far from the sea," said Edi. "Here is something for you to remember the day we were given our horses, and when we rode together."

Kati unfolded the leather sheet, and saw a pendant made from a single sh.e.l.l that gave off every color in the rainbow. A single hole had been punched in it, and it hung on a leather thong with several smaller sh.e.l.ls to either side of it. It was truly beautiful, and Kati said so.

Edi smiled shyly. "I wish we lived closer to each other. I won't see you until next Festival. That's five years." She hesitated. "All the other girls in my ordu are older than me. Or else they're just babies."

Kati was desperate for an idea about what to give in return. Suddenly, she thought of her dagger, and pulled it from her waistband. "Da made this for me, but he won't mind if I give it to a friend. Here, take it."

Edi took the dagger, ran her fingers along the blade. "I'll keep it always," she said, then stepped up to Kati and gave her a hug. "Goodbye." And then she ran away to her family.

Manlee came by to say goodbye to Ma and Da, and to remind them of their prayers. Kati saw Ma looking at her while the woman was talking, and looked away. Ma had hugged her awake in the morning, had braided her hair in silence. There was now a certain wariness about Ma, a tension between them. But this morning there were no thoughts in Kati's head, even with all the people so close, so perhaps it was a pa.s.sing thing.

Abaka returned with the horses, with Sushua trailing behind. Da bridled her, and put a colorful blanket on her back for the long journey home. In short time the horses were loaded, Kati was mounted on Sushua, and Baber was grinning from his place before Da on Kaidu.

Manlee held up her arms, and there was silence. For many moments they listened to the roar coming from the canyon, and then Manlee shouted, "Now go with the protection of Tengri, and may he bring us all together again in this place five years from now. Have a safe journey!"

She waved an arm, and suddenly water was again cascading from the top of the cliff to splash with force into the pool. The great waterfall had been silent during their stay on the beach, only to suddenly reappear as they were leaving. Kati was again amazed.

Because they had camped close to the pool, Kati and her family were one of the last groups to reach the plateau. Kati looked for Edi, but never found her. Five years was a very long time. She would nearly be a woman before she saw Edi again. When they reached the plateau, she saw long lines of horses stretched along the trails headed towards the western sea, and wished she were going with them where it was always warm. But they turned east, and soon they were alone, headed towards their isolated ordu beyond the mountains to keep watch on the emperor.

Sushua trotted easily along with the others, but Ma made her stay near the rear of the column. Sushua seemed content with this, but Kati quickly became bored with the pace. When a flyer came over them at mid-day, she waved to it. When it made a second pa.s.s, at low level, she waved again, until Ma glared at her.

"Do not call attention to us," warned Ma.

Kati pouted. Ma was too serious about everything. Besides, she was sure one of the men in the flyer had waved back to her. What was the harm?

They camped that night in the place by the pa.s.s between the two fingers of rock, and it was cold again. The other ordus were warm by the sea, and here she was again, back in the mountains and the cold. She fought for breath again before falling into a restless sleep that ended too soon.

They came down from the line of peaks above their ordu in mid-afternoon of the following day, and the column suddenly stopped. Kuchlug came back to get Ma, and she went forward to the head of the line. When she came back, her eyes were tinged red. "Mounted troops of the Emperor are near our ordu," she said to Kati. "We will wait until they are gone."

As they descended the final slope towards home, Kati looked north and saw a line of mounted people with the light of Tengri-Khan sparkling on their clothing until they disappeared beyond a thumb of rock. The column suddenly picked up speed, and Kati had a chance to gallop Sushua just as they were nearing the ordu. Adults leaped from their horses, rushed inside their gerts. As Kati pulled up with Ma before their ger, Da came out and said, "Everything has been searched, but they haven't disturbed anything I can see. Kuchlug, give me a hand here!"

Da and Kuchlug went inside the ger as Ma helped Kati dismount. She tethered Sushua to a post, and went inside. Da and Kuchlug had moved the stove aside and were pulling up boards beneath it. A leather-wrapped bundle was in a hole beneath the boards. It was the weapon Da kept hidden there. "Still here," said Da, "but we have to find a safer place to store these, away from the ordu. Tell the other men."

Kuchlug left after helping Da reposition the stove. Ma went to Da, hugged him. "This is not a good welcome," said Da. "We no longer have rights in the eyes of the Emperor. It is not safe here, Toregene. Maybe you should take the children and-"

"Our place is with you," said Ma. "This is our home."

Her head on Da's chest, arms around him, Ma's eyes met Kati's.

A test of your imagination, my daughter. A Searcher will come, and when he does you must think of the blackness of a night sky. And if you listen to his thoughts, your face must betray no emotion at what you hear. You will show him you are only a little girl. Do you hear me, Kati?

Kati nodded her head slowly. Not blackness, Ma. I will think of the green eyes that take all the thoughts away from me.

Ma's hands clutched at Da's back, and her eyes turned bright red.

Kati suddenly felt a horrible fear, and knew it was not her own.

The fear was coming from Ma.

CHAPTER THREE.

SEARCHERS.

Sushua, like the wind, rushed down the scree-fall by the Emperor's Thumb with a great clatter, and out onto the plateau, trampling gra.s.s and scattering the petals of aging wildflowers fluttering in submission. Kati bent low over Sushua's neck, reins held lightly, knees squeezing rhythmically with the beat of the gallop. Cold air seared her face, but she was warmed by Tengri-Khan directly overhead, and the thick tunic of wool over her leathers.

Her boldness in riding had come in one great leap with the gift of a saddle from her parents on her sixth birthday, when they saw that her legs were suddenly longer, while Sushua had ceased to grow. The short, stubby saddle horn was enough for Kati to grab with a short jump, and mount with a push off from the stirrup. Now standing in those stirrups, it seemed she floated above the back of the little horse, yet they were one.

She held the charge for a kilometer on the level plateau, until they came to the westward trail and slowed. They climbed a hanging canyon to a rock peak that was really four pinnacles almost symmetrically s.p.a.ced to enclose a small pasture with rich gra.s.s and the little flowers Sushua had been named after. The place commanded a fine view in all directions, including the Emperor's domed city and Edi's great ocean to the west.

Abaka had shown her the place only weeks before, when she'd first dared to ride with the older boys. The boys' conversation had been m.u.f.fled, with some laughter at private secrets they shared, but Kati could see their memories of adventures they'd had with certain girls in the soft gra.s.s, and she'd held her tongue. Now she was here alone for the first time, and there were no thoughts to distract her, other than her own.

Kati dismounted, and rubbed Sushua down with a rough cloth until the horse groaned with pleasure. She combed out her mane and tail, tied ribbons to the long, black hair, then admired her work as Sushua looked back at her with a mouthful of gra.s.s and flowers. The wind moaned between the rock spires around her, and Kati was suddenly at peace with herself.

Ma had asked her out of the ger when the arguments among the men had become loud with accusations and denials. Two of the men had traveled far to deny knowledge of raids on the Emperor's new barley fields. They were liars, for Kati saw the images of two boys involved, even their horses, and knew that the boys were the men's' own sons. Da had even seen their lies, threatened to go to Manlee, and then the cursing had begun.

Now she was away from all of that. Now she was away from thoughts she should tell Da, but couldn't, because it was evil to do so. After that confrontation with Ma at festival, she'd hoped the thoughts would go away, but they hadn't. They'd just kept getting stronger, more numerous, and the green eyes that drove them away seemed to have abandoned her after that last night at festival.

There were no thoughts from Ma, her mind a carefully guarded thing since the day they'd returned from festival to have that one, brief conversation without words. Ma was wary in her presence, yet loved her still, with much touching: warm hugs at bedtime, bathing, the combing and braiding of her hair. She even let Kati sit with her at meditation before the little stone altar in their ger on those occasions when Da was outside and Baber asleep.

The altar was a flat slab of stone. On it was a bowl of grain, a cup of fresh tea, a bundle of dried, sweet gra.s.s and a candle. Ma would light a few stems of gra.s.s, which gave off a delicious odor, then the candle. She would stare at the flickering candle for several moments, then close her eyes and go deep within herself. There were no prayers, or thoughts, but when Ma emerged from those quiet moments, she seemed refreshed and serene, as if the troubles of her day had been washed from her. Kati had tried it several times, and twice fell sound asleep. And the green eyes had not been returned by her efforts.

But here, in her high place, Kati looked out towards the great sea, and felt a quiet peace within herself. She fingered her pendants: Tengri's Eye, Edi's colorful sh.e.l.l. She thought of Edi, and wished that she could live by the sea.

A flyer pa.s.sed by to the south, turned, and came back across the plateau at an alt.i.tude lower than hers. The flyers were out four or five times a day now, and mounted patrols had come by their ordu several times this month alone. 'Just showing their presence,' Da had said. But that presence was on the increase, and the people resented it. In their thoughts, they cursed that presence, and the Emperor of Shanji.

Kati waited until the flyer had dropped into the valley of the Emperor's city, then mounted Sushua, and they picked their way carefully back down the canyon to the trail and the gra.s.sy plateau below. They walked the trail back to the ordu, arriving in time to see two men mounting their horses in front of Kati's ger. Da and Ma had come outside to see them off. Da's face was grim, Ma's eyes tinged red in warning as Kati came near.

"I cannot control the young hotheads in every ordu," said one man. "I can only talk to the parents, and remind them of their responsibilities in controlling older children, Temujin."

"Remind them also that any reprisals will come first to the ordu designated by Manlee to keep watch on the Emperor. And if they think they're safe from harm, they should remember that a flyer can reach them in two hours, and destroy all they possess in minutes. Tell them that, Bao," said Da.