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She considered him a moment, her lips parted as though she were about to say something, but it remained unsaid, and a slight colour came into her cheeks.
"What am I to do about you?" he went on, apparently addressing the blade of gra.s.s he was staring at. "I can't leave you as matters stand."
She said:
"Please, you are not responsible for me, are you?" And tried to laugh, but scarcely smiled.
"I want to be," he muttered. "I desire to be entirely----"
"Thank you. You have been more than kind. And very soon I hope I shall be on happy terms with my own Government again. Then your solicitude should cease."
"If your Government listens to reason----"
"Then I also could go to France!" she interrupted. "Merely to think of it excites me beyond words!"
He looked up quickly:
"You wish to go back?"
"Of course!"
"Why?"
"How can you ask that! If you had been a disgraced exile as I have been, as I still am--and falsely accused of shameful things--annoyed, hounded, blackmailed, offered bribes, constantly importuned to become what I am not--a traitor to my own people--would you not be wildly happy to be proven innocent? Would you not be madly impatient to return and prove your devotion to your own land?"
"I understand," he said in a low voice.
"Of course you understand. Do you imagine that I, a French girl, would have remained here in shameful security if I could have gone back to France and helped? I would have done anything--anything, I tell you--scrubbed the floors of hospitals, worked my fingers to the bone----"
"I'll wait till you go," he said.... "They'll clear your record very soon, I expect. I'll wait. And we'll go together. Shall we, Thessa?"
But she had not seemed to hear him; her dark eyes grew remote, her gaze swept the sapphire distance. It was his hand laid lightly over hers that aroused her, and she withdrew her fingers with a frown of remonstrance.
"Won't you let me speak?" he said. "Won't you let me tell you what my heart tells me?"
She shook her head slowly:
"I don't desire to hear yet--I don't know where my own heart--or even my mind is--or what I think about--anything. Please be reasonable."
She stole a look at him to see how he was taking it, and there was concern enough in her glance to give him a certain amount of hope had he noticed it.
"You like me, Thessa, don't you?" he urged.
"Have I not admitted it? Do you know that you are becoming a serious responsibility to me? You worry me, too! You are like a boy with all your emotions reflected on your features and every thought perfectly unconcealed and every impulse followed by unconsidered behaviour.
"Be reasonable. I have asked it a hundred times of you in vain. I shall ask it, probably, innumerable times before you comply with my request. Don't show so plainly that you imagine yourself in love. It embarra.s.ses me, it annoys Garry, and I don't know what his family will think----"
"But if I _am_ in love, why not----"
"Does one advertise all one's most intimate and secret and--and sacred emotions?" she interrupted in sudden and breathless annoyance. "It is not the way that successful courts.h.i.+p is conducted, I warn you! It is not delicate, it is not considerate, it is not sensible.... And I _do_ want you to--to be always--sensible and considerate. I _want_ to like you."
He looked at her in a sort of dazed way:
"I'll try to please you," he said. "But it seems to confuse me--being so suddenly bowled over--a thing like that rather knocks a man out--so unexpected, you know!--and there isn't much use pretending," he went on excitedly. "I can't see anybody else in the world except you! I can't think of anybody else! I'm madly in love--blindly, desperately----"
"Oh, please, _please_!" she remonstrated. "I'm not a girl to be taken by storm! I've seen too much--lived too much! I'm not a Tzigane to be galloped alongside of and swung to a man's saddle-bow! Also, I shall tell you one thing more. Happiness and laughter are necessities to me! And they seem to be becoming extinct in you."
"Hang it!" he demanded tragically, "how can I laugh when I'm in love!"
At that a sudden, irresponsible little peal of laughter parted her lips.
"Oh, dear!" she said, "you _are_ funny! Is it a matter of prayer and fasting, then, this gloomy sentiment which you say you entertain for me? I don't know whether to be flattered or vexed--you are _so_ funny!" And her laughter rang out again, clear and uncontrolled.
The girl was quite irresistible in her care-free gaiety; her lovely face and delicious laughter no man could utterly withstand, and presently a faint grin became visible on his features.
"Now," she cried gaily, "you are becoming human and not a Grecian mask or a gargoyle! Remain so, mon ami, if you expect me to wish you good luck in your love--your various affairs----" She blushed as she checked herself. But he said very quickly:
"Will you wish me luck, Thessa, in my various love affairs?"
"How many have you on hand?"
"Exactly one. Do you wish me a sporting chance? Do you, Thessa?"
"Why--yes----"
"Will you wish me good luck in my courts.h.i.+p of you?"
The quick colour again swept her cheeks at that, but she laughed defiantly:
"Yes," she said, "I wish you luck in that, also. Only remember this--whether you win or lose you must laugh. _That_ is good sportsmans.h.i.+p. Do you promise? Very well! Then I wish you the best of luck in your--various--courts.h.i.+ps! And may the girl you win at least know how to laugh!"
"She certainly does," he said so navely that they both gave way to laughter again, finding each other delightfully absurd.
"It's the key to my heart, laughter--in case you are looking for the key," she said daringly. "The world is a grim scaffold, mon ami; mount it gaily and go to the far G.o.ds laughing. Tell me, is there a better way to go?"
"No; it's the right way, Thessa. I shan't be a gloom any more. Come on; let's walk! What if you do get your bally shoes wet! I'm through mooning and fussing and worrying over you, young lady! You're as st.u.r.dy and vigorous as I am. After all, it's a comrade a man wants in the world--not a white mouse in cotton batting! Come! Are you going for a brisk walk across country? Or are you a white mouse?"
She stood up in her dainty shoes and frail gown and cast a glance of hurt reproach at him.
"Don't be brutal," she said. "I'm not dressed to climb trees and fences with you."
"You won't come?"
Their eyes met in silent conflict for a few moments. Then she said: "Please don't make me.... It's such a darling gown, Jim."
A wave of deep happiness enveloped him and he laughed: "All right," he said, "I won't ask you to spoil your frock!" And he spread his coat on the pine needles for her once more.
She considered the situation for a few moments before she sat down.
But she did seat herself.