In a World Where Beauty is Reversed, a Harem Only for Me - BestLightNovel.com
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It seems I will end up pa.s.sing out any minute now.
My heart beats with a *doki doki* like an alarm bell. My head is dizzy with an over excessive amount of nervousness.
『I don't want to hold a slender and frail woman like you.』
『Are you even human?』
『I don't want to look at a woman with such inflated b.r.e.a.s.t.s.』
『Disgusting.』『Die.』『Go away.』
『It would have been better if you weren't born.』『You should not have been born.』
I had a flashback of some of the words that were said to me in the past.
But some part of my lowly, shameful self had some expectations.
I also had expectations in the past.
I had saved up enough money to build a palace in the imperial capital and went to a brothel while my heart beat quickly.
At least we had thought to wash ourselves thoroughly in order to not seem like a dirty woman…but when we got there all we received were looks of pure, intense disgust.
But we wanted to learn more about a man and so we tried to pay with the money we were grasping tightly.
However, everywhere we went as soon as they saw my face they would reject my money.
『Please go home.』
I tried to restrain the other person while pleading that I would pay any amount of money.
They shook their heads in refusal when we entered the brothel and they said that no male prost.i.tute would be willing to keep us company.
On the contrary, whenever they would look at us when we undressed it would cause them to vomit.
Even though it was just the beginning…it was just the beginning but we had already been to a variety of stores.
But it was useless.
There is even a store where we are prohibited from going in and out of.
I spent everyday with a look of despair as I had delusions of a happiness I could never reach.
I curse this body many times over.
These slender and long limbs, this lanky body is all making me miserable. 2
In my delusions I would hold hands with a man.
And then only in my delusion would my lover comfort my hot body.
But since I don't know a man's warmth I can't be satisfied.
After I finished masturbating I would cry to myself quietly until I fell asleep.
But perhaps what I want isn't too far out of reach.
I try to take advantage of his kindness.
That's why I put on an appearance like I would apply a curse to someone.
But, even so… despite that, for once I would like to be loved by a man.
「E-to」
I am surprised by such a sudden development.
Somehow it seems my actions have differed from the novel's protagonist once again.
「Tsu-!」
Nina looks in my direction with eyes that shake with anxiety.
It's the first time I've had a woman look at me with a feverish gaze.
But I think we may be skipping a couple steps here.
「P-Please! Somehow, please…」
Still she was serious.
Nina thought I would come to hate her any second now so tears started to acc.u.mulate in her eyes.
I looked at the desperate Nina and my slow wits finally realized.
I already know her.
But then she was saved from that sorrow when she met the protagonist.
I didn't properly take her feelings into consideration.
"…Stop s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g around."
I wanted to hit myself who was only trying to follow the actions of the protagonist.
This girl who sincerely wanted to know about me was unbearably lovely.
「Nina.」
Nina had her name called out and she trembled.
And yet she had mustered up her courage.
In that case, I need to prepare myself as well.
「I like you.」
I am not the protagonist.
But even so, this feeling is the only thing I won't lie about.
「Eh… eh…?」
Nina made a face like a pigeon being shot by a peashooter3
She was utterly confused.
「You l-like me? Eh, eh?…eh?」
I thought it would be cowardly to not convey these feelings to her.
Even if only a little, I want these feelings to be transmitted to her.
「It was love at first sight. Please go out with me.」
I lower my head to her.
It's scary. Just the thought that I might be refused is gonna make my heart burst.
Although it is a bit late, I feel like I can understand the extent of her resolution.
「That, a-are you serious?」
In this world, a love confession is considered sacred.
Even if only a little I want to take some of the burden off of this beautiful girl in front of my eyes.
I thought I would like to go through life with her hand in hand.
「Please, please believe me.」
The girl, who had a face that said she didn't understand what just occurred, finally realized the situation.
Even so I keep my gaze locked on her strongly and slowly start to speak to ascertain her feelings.
「I-I am incredibly ugly right? Is that alright? Are you- are you alright with me?」
「Please don't say things that will lower your own self-value. I fell in love with you at first sight.」
When I answered without any hesitation, I found out that Nina had lost her breath.
「For me, please. Can I please be your first love?」
When I said so, almost as if a dam burst, her tears started to flow uncontrollably.
Even so I still thought she was pretty and beautiful.
「I, am ugly but…I want to try holding hands and being held closely.」
But she continues.
「Everyone thinks it would be okay for someone like me to die…! That's why I always thought it would be fine if I would die.」
「… If you still have the courage to want to live I will embrace you as much as is required, so please don't die.」
「Everyone would say I am ugly! I am a monster! Such things, to me, I hated it! I couldn't handle it! But, but…!」
I couldn't wait anymore and embraced Nina.
It made me happy so I put more power in my arms and strengthened my embrace.
「Apart from that- I- about me- more than anything…!I wanted someone to say they like me! Just once, even if it was only once it would be fine, I wanted to receive someone's love!」
I accept Nina's piled up emotions.
The power she put in her arms started to hurt, but even so I still accepted it.
「I love you, Nina. That's why please don't be convinced that you aren't human!」
I move my face close to Nina's ear.
I was overcome with a flurry of emotions and speak about my heavy feelings that I had been holding back.
「I love everything about you.」
When I hug her tightly, she immediately returns my embrace with even more power.
She was extremely beautiful.
I tried to the best of my efforts to convey my feelings to this girl and slowly and gently stroked her head.
Says perfect so I think it means symmetric ↩ This seems like she is just complimenting herself lol ↩ Common expression I guess ↩