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"G.o.d have mercy on you, Lilly, wherever it is your ways are leading you."
"He has had, Mrs. Schum."
"I don't know. I don't know. You know best, I guess, what is in your heart."
"I do. It's this. Why can't you take--us?"
"Who?"
"I want her with me. She is getting big enough for the kind of training I have all mapped out for her. And now you--it's nothing short of destiny led me to you. I could put her in day school. Can take her myself in the mornings, say, and you, dear Mrs. Schum, are to call for her? I can pay, I can help you and you can help me. Later we may take a larger place with extra room. Mrs. Schum, don't you see, we've been thrown together!"
"Why, Lilly--I believe--I do."
It was after ten o'clock when, over a belated little meal, they ceased their planning. Eleven, when Harry finally walked with her across the viaduct to the street car. Stars were out. Thick white ones. She skipped a little, ran a little, and stood a moment at the parapet, looking down at the lights which followed the narrow course of the river. She felt suddenly wild for bauble. Her flesh, which never particularly craved the lay of fine fabric, felt cheated. She wanted to wind her body to its utmost flexuosity, bare her throat to the wind, and fling out a gesture the width of Vegas to Capella.
At the corner she took Harry's face between her hands, kissing him soundly on the lips.
"Good night, Harry, and G.o.d bless you for letting me find you."
Long after that kiss, ever so lightly bestowed, lay burning against his lips and she had boarded the street car, he stood looking after, with his very light-blue eyes.
Book Three
THE WINE
CHAPTER I
When Zoe Penny was still in knee frocks she graduated, first in her cla.s.s, from the public grade school. It was a period of great stress for Lilly, of happy shopping and the sweet anxieties of ribbon and frock, and there were always two high circles of color out on her cheeks, and from time to time she would force herself to sit down, uncurl her fingers of their tensity, as Ida Blair had taught her, and thus, starting in at the hands, try to relax.
After two or three moves from the makes.h.i.+ft of the Tremont Avenue apartment, they were finally installed in an old brownstone walk-up house in West Ninety-third Street, a stone's throw removed from an avenue of Elevated structure and petty shops, but with a quiet enough, if gloomy, dignity. One of those tunnel dwellings, the light from the front room and kitchen gradually petering out into a middle room of almost absolute darkness.
Lilly and her daughter occupied what corresponded to the parlor, a room of white woodwork, flimsy white mantelpiece, and gilded radiator; one of the vertical layers and layers of just such city parlors. Two narrow front windows looked down into Ninety-third Street and there were closed white folding doors with again a rented piano against them. A pretty screen of j.a.panese paper with a sprig of wistaria across it shut off a bureau with a layout of much juvenile claptrap of hair ribbons, side combs, and the worthless treasures of childhood. Between the windows a "lady's" desk with hinged writing slab, really Lilly's, but mostly the dangling place for a pair of Zoe's roller skates and its pigeonholes bulging with her daughter's somewhat extraneous matter. But there were a two-tone brown rug, and yellow silk curtains saved the room from the iniquitous Nottingham and Axminster school of interior defamation. The walls, too, were tempered of their whiteness by brown prints of the "Coliseum by Night," "The Age of Innocence," and Watt's "Hope,"
blindfolded, atop the world.
These pictures had been shopped one Sat.u.r.day afternoon at the cut-rate department store and were largely Zoe's choice, happily corroborated by Lilly.
"Remarkable selections for a miss," said the clerk.
"Do you really think so?" cried Lilly, herself turning away from an inclination toward the more chromatic and immediately exhilarated out of a state of fatigue.
"Zoe, you're wonderful!"
"You're wonderful, too, Lilly."
There had been scarcely any baby talk.
At three, it was "Zoe, are you happy to see mother this week-end?"
"Ees, ummie."
And then one day out of the pellucid sky of babyhood, in answer to this invariable query, it was:
"Yes, Lilly," so suddenly that something seemed to catch at her heartbeat, but after a pang she let it stand.
Let Lilly's Zoe dawn upon you through this rather typical conversation between them, the night before the graduation from grade school:
"Lilly, am I beautiful?"
"Why, yes, Zoe, so long as you remain fine and unspoiled by it. That is the rarest kind of loveliness--inner beauty."
"I don't mean that kind. Am I pretty--for boys to look at?"
"You are pretty enough as little girls go, if that is what you mean."
"Is it wrong to have beaus?"
"That all depends. Why?"
"Oh, I just wanted to know."
Silence.
"A boy in my cla.s.s, Gerald Prang, says he is my beau."
"Silly fellow."
"Ethel Watts has one. They kiss."
"That's horrid."
"Is it horrid for me and Ethel to kiss?"
"No, Zoe, you know it isn't."
"Would it be horrid for me and Gerald--Gerald and I--to kiss?"
"Yes."
"Why?"
"Listen, Zoe, a new word. The most beautiful and the most horrible thing in the world can be s.e.x."