Diary Of A Vampeen Part 24

"When was her last meal?" he asked probing my tongue with a stick. "Say 'ahh'," he advised.

I obeyed in opening my mouth but I refused to say 'ah!' It's completely unnecessary.

"About nineteen hours ago," my mother replied.

"Yes, well her throat is coated beyond normal capacity; it seems her body has reached starvation level. Her body is crying for nutrients. She needs to eat at once," he commanded.

"I"ll see that she does immediately," my mother replied, worry seeping into her expression.

"Call me should you need me, but I'm sure Alexa will be fine once she eats. Just make sure she is consistent in portions; better to take more than enough over not enough. No skimping allowed Alexa," he advised staring directly at me.

I shook my head acknowledging his orders. With that he gathered his medical instruments into a black bag, the same leather bag a doctor would carry in a house call on the set of 'I Love Lucy,' and left the room.

"I'll bring you food honey. Just rest here for now," my mother said, kissing my forehead before following my aunt and the doctor.

No sooner had she scurried out the door that Kellan was by my side. "How are you feeling?" he asked promptly sitting on the bed beside me.

"You changed your clothes."

"Your aunt picked them up for me. How are you?" he repeated.

"I'm okay. I just needed to sleep like I said."

"And eat. Your throat must be burning by this point. Why would you put yourself through that much pain?" he demanded furrowing his brows.

I began to fidget with my hands answering an honest, "I didn't know. In Breaking Dawn Bella says she always has a sort of burning feeling in her throat."

"d.a.m.n it Lexi! This isn't a fictional book; this is your life!" His face scrunched and lips pursed as the belting fear broke his surface.

"I know. I just didn't know about that," I said unable to look at him knowing he was so angry with me.

"I'm sorry. I got scared, that's all. I've never seen any vampeens or vampires get like that before. An hour into your sleep, I was certain you would somehow die though you're supposed to be immortal," he explained pulling me into his chest and embracing me tightly.

"I'm sorry I scared you. But can I ask you something without angering you?" I attempted to set up the right mood. I needed to know for sure that I wasn't killing myself by refusing my body's desire for human blood. Despite putting two and two together, I couldn't bring myself to hurt another human for my own survival. I may be a vampire in many ways but not when it comes to the ruthless murder of mankind for my appet.i.te alone.

"Of course."

"What happens if you eat only human food?" I decided to go with this approach so he couldn't link it back to me and my earlier mishap.

"I could eat like that for probably a month before my body would be depleted of back up resources. Every vamp is different in molecular design. Your body craves what it needs. My body needs human blood, so eating human food would be like eating vegan without supplements. It would supply my system with several vital necessities, but the lack in the remainder would kill me."

"I thought we were immortal?"

"We are. I would just live forever in a vegetative state. We don't have vitamin supplements like humans do to falsely recreate the missing elements within us," he answered.

"Oh. And this back up supply, we're born with it, right?" I checked. My heart was beginning to beat faster in response to my stress. The repercussions of my choice were being placed before me verbally.

"No. Your body creates it with your first several meals. That's why you're so hungry. Your body needs more in the beginning to ensure a sufficient reserve. So you need to eat more."

Oh my gos.h.!.+ I'm committing vamp suicide! Even worse, I was a food-shoveling human and forty-eight hours later I was an anorexic vampeen. How did this happen? I didn't mean to deprive myself; it's just morally I couldn't harm a human. Every man would remind me of my dad, and every woman a mom, and every teenager a Mel or Mike. I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

I toyed mentally with telling Kellan, but opted to keep my secret. My mother returned with a gla.s.s of water, two eggs sunny side up and an oozing red slightly cooked steak. The steak was smothered in red gravy, no doubt a blood sauce.

Seeing the food made the liquid in my throat overflow into my mouth for the first time. I started swallowing repeatedly trying to down the bubbling juice to no avail. I began to panic. I bit a piece of steak smothered in blood, chewing rapidly to rid the volcano in my mouth. Like high tide at the beach, the serum lifted and retracted in intervals after my bite eventually leveling off.

It's working. Maybe I really was supposed to eat human food. Maybe I just didn't consume enough before. Maybe it's the sauce. I didn't have the blood gravy before. "What kind of sauce is this?" I asked my mother. "It's good."

"It's leftover from the other night. I sometimes do a human blood marinade on my steaks and that's one of them. For some reason it tends to enhance the flavors," she explained with an approving grin.

The sauce. The gravy of human blood was what's ridding the serum, not the food itself. I froze. I glanced at the food, then my mom, then Kellan, moving my eyes alone. I was torn. Did I continue to devour the marinade that would cure me or stick to my guns in not partic.i.p.ating in human slaughter?

Being ever rebellious, I picked up the fork and staked the eggs. It took me no more than two minutes to swallow both eggs. I pushed the plate away announcing, "I'm done."

"But you left the entire steak," my mother complained.

"I didn't like it," I lied, shrugging my shoulders.

"You just said it was good," she argued, hands on her hips and no smile on her face.

"It left a bad after-taste in my mouth," I reasoned feeling a bit guilty over the fib and insult of my mother's cooking. I couldn't think fast enough to concoct a less hurtful excuse.

"Well you have to eat more than two eggs," she pressed.

"I will after," I attempted to negotiate, but failed when Kellan got into it.

"No. Now. You don't want a repeat of several hours ago," he ordered firmly.

"Ugh!" I groaned looking back and forth between the two of them. Waving the white flag I said, "Fine. I'll be down in a bit."

"No, now," my mother insisted.

"Can I please shower and change first?"

"You and your showers! I swear you should live in the rainforest," she remarked in frustration on her way out the door. My mother didn't know the calming effect a shower had on me.

I could hear my dad sleeping soundly and Aunt Claire coercing Dr. H into a movie date later this week.

"Is your car unlocked?" I asked Kellan knowing I would need to tap into my new wardrobe for something to wear.

"Your clothes are in your closet. Your aunt insisted on organizing it all while you were sleeping," he replied.

"Oh." I hopped off the bed and flung open my closet door. There, filling every nook of my closet, organized by item and color, were my new clothes. Lining the floors were my shoe boxes with a Polaroid of what was inside pasted to each one. Installed on the once bare back wall were two shelves and two rows of hooks holding my belts, scarves and purses. On the opposing wall by the door was a freshly hung bulletin board with pictures from today tacked to it to remind me of what went together. Looking around, I realized Aunt Claire had thought of everything except... I forgot pajamas my one comfort staple.

As if he heard my mental anguish, Kellan announced, "She bought you pajamas. They're in your dresser."

I lit with excitement and ran to the drawers. I opened every drawer one by one. My top two contained a mountain of panties and four new bras. The middle ones held tanks and a few simple tees. Opening the bottom two I was shocked at what I found. On the right side were two pajama pants, two shorts and a smaller pair of VS capri sweats. Filling the other though was gasp! lingerie! I sifted through the pile of lace and silk sets varying in coverage. Beside it was a box of condoms with a note attached. I was mortified!

Lexi, I'm not your mother. Every young woman has desires and pa.s.sion flaring within her. The flames I see between you and Kellan are fierce so I wanted you to be prepared.

Have fun and be safe!

Love, Aunt Claire "Aunt Claire," I called in a raised voice, enough to know she would hear me clearly despite her male distraction. She climbed the stairs and entered my room within thirteen seconds of my call, just in time for the angst to climax within me.

"Yes dear?" she asked.

"Umm... Ear m.u.f.fs Kellan." He rolled his eyes and covered his ears. Though I was sure he could still hear me, knowing he wasn't supposed to should at least keep him from talking about it later.

"Aunt Claire," I whispered. "What is all this?"

She closed the door and replied softly, "It's for you to be safe when you're having fun with you-know-who over here." She motioned to Kellan with a side nod of her head. "If you don't need it now, just save it for when you're ready."

"He's not even my boyfriend. I have a human boyfriend named Mike."

"Ooh Lexi! I knew you were just like me," she cooed proudly. "But I'm telling you now, I've never met two people or vamps with more chemistry than you have with Kellan. Even I feel the heat between you two. I'm so jealous!" she said with a southern accent, abandoning her usual west coast one.

"I'm confused right now," I admitted.

"Well talk to me honey. That's what I'm here for."

"I don't even know where to start," I said sitting Indian style on the floor.

"Start from the beginning. Who's this Mike?" she insisted settling beside me on the carpet.

I explained in depth who Mike was. I shared my original crush, the intimate details of our relations.h.i.+p, including my conclusion prior to my transformation. I told her all my discomforts and mental quaderies over the situation saving the worst, his monologue, for last. I will admit, recalling all those things officially made me submerge myself in slight regret, but it brought me relief simultaneously. I knew Kellan was the guy for me; it was only guilt bringing this bout over Mike because I knew at this point I was intentionally hurting him since I didn't break it off before.

"He sounds like a great guy Lexi, but you clearly didn't want to get together with him originally, so why did you agree?" Aunt Claire probed.

"Well, he's a nice guy and to be honest, he was the first guy to even acknowledge my existence." That line was beginning to sound lame even to me.

"Alexa."

"Uh oh. You called me Alexa. What's wrong?"

"What are your doubts with Kellan?" she asked.

I pondered this silently for a minute, but came up empty handed. When we connected on a spiritual level, I clearly saw and heard his intentions in commitment. I saw exactly how he viewed me as a human and discovered he never lied to me except with his age, which was for his own pre-conceived rejection. It washed my doubts away and discarded any hesitations I carried over him.

"None that I can think of," I sighed.

"Now compare that list to the negative one you have with Mike."

"Oh, I see where you're going with this."

"I can't tell you what to do, but as an outsider looking in, I can share my view. My philosophy is 'When in doubt, you can live without.' I have so many men floating around me and with every last one of them I can tell you why it won't work, explain my doubts. I keep them around because I have to entertain myself somehow until the right one comes along. Seriously though, what you have with Kellan I've only heard and read stories about. You don't throw that away, no matter what the cost."

"Thanks Aunt Claire."

"Like I said, anytime dear. And listen, don't fret yourself into action immediately. You're young; you have plenty of time," she offered as a parting note.

"Thanks," I smiled.

She winked. On her way out the room she pointed to Kellan and then flapped her hands as if to fan herself profusely. Bluntly she said he was hot.

I chuckled, returning to the bed relieving Kellan's hands of m.u.f.f duty.

"Did you have a nice chat with your aunt?" he asked.

"Oh please! Don't even pretend like you didn't hear anything," I scolded sarcastically.

He smiled wide and brilliant. Acting on impulse I leaned in and kissed him. Feeling the serum desert my throat amidst this kindle is what brought awareness to just how bad it was hurting. No hurting was too light. The healing liquid was literally roasting my throat. The relief I enc.u.mbered in kissing Kellan kept me glued to him. Whatever happens though, I couldn't let us unite again beyond the physical. He would certainly discover my bold secret with it fresh on my mind; it's a miracle he didn't learn the last time. Though after seeing the number of humans he had drained lifeless, I could never succ.u.mb to his lifestyle.

He gently laid me back on the bed and hovered over me. I sunk down cradling his body with my arms. His touch sent chills down my spine and left a tingling sensation wherever he caressed me. This new energy encompa.s.sed us and I knew I would have to pull away soon. So with one last ditch effort, I threw myself into him, let down my barriers and then quickly released from his lip lock.

We spent the next few minutes just gazing into each other's eyes. The liquid refilled my throat, but I remained peaceful in his arms. My aunt was right, Kellan was the right guy for me; I knew he certainly believed that to be true and I did too. It's strange to think that you've found your soul mate at sixteen, but destiny doesn't work by age.

I sat up, turned to Kellan now lying beside me and asked, "So you ready to teach me some killer moves?"

"I don't think that's such a good idea."

"Why? You said I need to learn," I argued.

"You just pa.s.sed out a couple hours ago, ate hardly anything and now expect me to work you physically?"

"Yea?"

"Not happening. You need to eat. Then I'll consider it."

"I haven't even showered yet though," I whined trying to put off scarfing more food down my burning throat.

"Lexi. What's going on? Why are you trying to avoid the thing that makes you stronger?" he pressed suspiciously.

c.r.a.p. He's onto me. I didn't want to add him to the list of people I'd lied to. It's bad enough that I'd added three new people in three days Mel, Mike and my mom.

"It just doesn't taste good," I replied remembering the weird after-taste of the first steak I consumed five bites of. It didn't taste horrible, just wasn't appetizing in any way.

Before he could reply, I was off the bed. I scurried grabbing my new green VS capri sweats, which matched his eyes, and a white tank with an intricate black and grey design on the front. I kissed him lightly on my way to the bathroom and advised, "I'll be out in a bit... unless you want to join me." I teased flas.h.i.+ng a devilish grin.

"Tempting, but I'll pa.s.s," he smiled.

"Still playing the gentleman card I see."

"Hurry up," he grumbled.

"Yea, yea."

Midway through letting the hot water run down my back, I felt a fog cloud me; a feeling of exhaustion and slight dizziness far stronger than the time before. I placed my hands flat against the tiled wall feeling the color drain out of me. My breath began to come in shorter spurts. The serum in my throat ran over again filling my mouth, burning my tongue. I spit the clear syrup out profusely into the running water, swallowing the rest repeatedly.

I began to feel weak. I managed to turn off the water and wrap myself in the towel over the gla.s.s door before I sunk down against the wall of the shower. My head was heavy, my body putty, and my excellent vision was beginning to blur at the corners. I felt how I did when I was going under; I was fighting to stay conscious. I heard a knock at the bathroom door, but nothing was audible to me; all surrounding noises had muted in my drowsiness.