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The Anatomy of Melancholy Part 71

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"Gaze not on a maid," saith Siracides, "turn away thine eyes from a beautiful woman," c. 9. v. 5. 7, 8. _averte oculos_, saith David, or if thou dost see them, as Ficinus adviseth, let not thine eye be _intentus ad libidinem_, do not intend her more than the rest: for as [5645]Propertius holds, _Ipse alimenta sibi maxima praebet amor_, love as a snow ball enlargeth itself by sight: but as Hierome to Nepotian, _aut aequaliter ama, aut aequaliter ignora_, either see all alike, or let all alone; make a league with thine eyes, as [5646]Job did, and that is the safest course, let all alone, see none of them. Nothing sooner revives, [5647]"or waxeth sore again," as Petrarch holds, "than love doth by sight." "As pomp renews ambition; the sight of gold, covetousness; a beauteous object sets on fire this burning l.u.s.t." _Et multum saliens incitat unda sitim._ The sight of drink makes one dry, and the sight of meat increaseth appet.i.te. 'Tis dangerous therefore to see. A [5648]young gentleman in merriment would needs put on his mistress's clothes, and walk abroad alone, which some of her suitors espying, stole him away for her that he represented. So much can sight enforce. Especially if he have been formerly enamoured, the sight of his mistress strikes him into a new fit, and makes him rave many days after.

[5649] ------"Infirmis causa pusilla nocet, Ut pene extinctum cinerem si sulphure tangas, Vivet, et ex minimo maximus ignis erit: Sic nisi vitabis quicquid renovabit amorem, Flamma recrudescet, quae modo nulla fuit."

"A sickly man a little thing offends, As brimstone doth a fire decayed renew, And makes it burn afresh, doth love's dead flames, If that the former object it review."

Or, as the poet compares it to embers in ashes, which the wind blows, [5650]_ut solet a ventis_, &c., a scald head (as the saying is) is soon broken, dry wood quickly kindles, and when they have been formerly wounded with sight, how can they by seeing but be inflamed? Ismenias acknowledged as much of himself, when he had been long absent, and almost forgotten his mistress, [5651]"at the first sight of her, as straw in a fire, I burned afresh, and more than ever I did before." [5652]"Chariclia was as much moved at the sight of her dear Theagines, after he had been a great stranger." [5653]Mertila, in Aristaenetus, swore she would never love Pamphilus again, and did moderate her pa.s.sion, so long as he was absent; but the next time he came in presence, she could not contain, _effuse amplexa attrectari se sinit_, &c., she broke her vow, and did profusely embrace him. Hermotinus, a young man (in the said [5654]author) is all out as unstaid, he had forgot his mistress quite, and by his friends was well weaned from her love; but seeing her by chance, _agnovit veteris vestigia flammae_, he raved amain, _Illa tamen emergens veluti lucida stella cepit elucere_, &c., she did appear as a blazing star, or an angel to his sight.

And it is the common pa.s.sion of all lovers to be overcome in this sort. For that cause belike Alexander discerning this inconvenience and danger that comes by seeing, [5655]"when he heard Darius's wife so much commended for her beauty, would scarce admit her to come in his sight," foreknowing belike that of Plutarch, _formosam videre periculosissimum_, how full of danger it is to see a proper woman, and though he was intemperate in other things, yet in this _superbe se gessit_, he carried himself bravely. And so when as Araspus, in Xenophon, had so much magnified that divine face of Panthea to Cyrus, [5656]"by how much she was fairer than ordinary, by so much he was the more unwilling to see her." Scipio, a young man of twenty-three years of age, and the most beautiful of the Romans, equal in person to that Grecian Charinus, or Homer's Nireus, at the siege of a city in Spain, when as a n.o.ble and most fair young gentlewoman was brought unto him, [5657]"and he had heard she was betrothed to a lord, rewarded her, and sent her back to her sweetheart." St. Austin, as [5658]Gregory reports of him, _ne c.u.m sorore quidem sua putavit habitandum_, would not live in the house with his own sister. Xenocrates lay with Lais of Corinth all night, and would not touch her. Socrates, though all the city of Athens supposed him to dote upon fair Alcibiades, yet when he had an opportunity, [5659]_solus c.u.m solo_ to lie in the chamber with, and was wooed by him besides, as the said Alcibiades publicly [5660]confessed, _formam sprevit et superbe contempsit_, he scornfully rejected him. Petrarch, that had so magnified his Laura in several poems, when by the pope's means she was offered unto him, would not accept of her. [5661]"It is a good happiness to be free from this pa.s.sion of love, and great discretion it argues in such a man that he can so contain himself; but when thou art once in love, to moderate thyself (as he saith) is a singular point of wisdom."

[5662] "Nam vitare plagas in amoris ne jaciamur Non ita difficile est, quam captum retibus ipsis Exire, et validos Veneris perrumpere nodos."

"To avoid such nets is no such mastery, But ta'en escape is all the victory."

But, forasmuch as few men are free, so discreet lovers, or that can contain themselves, and moderate their pa.s.sions, to curb their senses, as not to see them, not to look lasciviously, not to confer with them, such is the fury of this headstrong pa.s.sion of raging l.u.s.t, and their weakness, _ferox ille ardor a natura insitus_, [5663]as he terms it "such a furious desire nature hath inscribed, such unspeakable delight."

"Sic Divae Veneris furor, Insanis adeo mentibus incubat,"

which neither reason, counsel, poverty, pain, misery, drudgery, _partus dolor_, &c., can deter them from; we must use some speedy means to correct and prevent that, and all other inconveniences, which come by conference and the like. The best, readiest, surest way, and which all approve, is _Loci mutatio_, to send them several ways, that they may neither hear of, see, nor have an opportunity to send to one another again, or live together, _soli c.u.m sola_, as so many Gilbertines. _Elongatio a patria_, 'tis Savanarola's fourth rule, and Gordonius' precept, _distrahatur ad longinquas regiones_, send him to travel. 'Tis that which most run upon, as so many hounds, with full cry, poets, divines, philosophers, physicians, all, _mutet patriam_: Valesius: [5664]as a sick man he must be cured with change of air, Tully _4 Tuscul_. The best remedy is to get thee gone, Jason Pratensis: change air and soil, Laurentius. [5665]_Fuge littus amatum_.

"Virg. Utile finitimis abstinuisse locis.

[5666] Ovid. I procul, et longas carpere perge vias.

------sed fuge tutus eris."

Travelling is an antidote of love,

[5667] "Magnum iter ad doctas proficisci cogor Athenas, Ut me longa gravi solvat amore via."

For this purpose, saith [5668]Propertius, my parents sent me to Athens; time and patience wear away pain and grief, as fire goes out for want of fuel. _Quantum oculis, animo tam procul ibit amor_. But so as they tarry out long enough: a whole year [5669]Xenophon prescribes _Critobulus, vix enim intra hoc tempus ab amore sanari poteris_: some will hardly be weaned under. All this [5670]Heinsius merrily inculcates in an epistle to his friend Primierus; first fast, then tarry, thirdly, change thy place, fourthly, think of a halter. If change of place, continuance of time, absence, will not wear it out with those precedent remedies, it will hardly be removed: but these commonly are of force. Felix Plater, _observ. lib.

1._ had a baker to his patient, almost mad for the love of his maid, and desperate; by removing her from him, he was in a short s.p.a.ce cured. Isaeus, a philosopher of a.s.syria, was a most dissolute liver in his youth, _palam lasciviens_, in love with all he met; but after he betook himself, by his friends' advice, to his study, and left women's company, he was so changed that he cared no more for plays, nor feasts, nor masks, nor songs, nor verses, fine clothes, nor no such love toys: he became a new man upon a sudden, _tanquam si priores oculos amisisset_, (saith mine [5671]author) as if he had lost his former eyes. Peter G.o.defridus, in the last chapter of his third book, hath a story out of St. Ambrose, of a young man that meeting his old love after long absence, on whom he had extremely doted, would scarce take notice of her; she wondered at it, that he should so lightly esteem her, called him again, _lenibat dictis animum_, and told him who she was, _Ego sum, inquit: At ego non sum ego_; but he replied, "he was not the same man:" _proripuit sese tandem_, as [5672]Aeneas fled from Dido, not vouchsafing her any farther parley, loathing his folly, and ashamed of that which formerly he had done. [5673]_Non sum stultus ut ante jam Neaera_. "O Neaera, put your tricks, and practise hereafter upon somebody else, you shall befool me no longer." Petrarch hath such another tale of a young gallant, that loved a wench with one eye, and for that cause by his parents was sent to travel into far countries, "after some years he returned, and meeting the maid for whose sake he was sent abroad, asked her how, and by what chance she lost her eye? no, said she, I have lost none, but you have found yours:" signifying thereby, that all lovers were blind, as Fabius saith, _Amantes de forma judicare non possunt_, lovers cannot judge of beauty, nor scarce of anything else, as they will easily confess after they return unto themselves, by some discontinuance or better advice, wonder at their own folly, madness, stupidity, blindness, be much abashed, "and laugh at love, and call it an idle thing, condemn themselves that ever they should be so besotted or misled: and be heartily glad they have so happily escaped."

If so be (which is seldom) that change of place will not effect this alteration, then other remedies are to be annexed, fair and foul means, as to persuade, promise, threaten, terrify, or to divert by some contrary pa.s.sion, rumour, tales, news, or some witty invention to alter his affection, [5674]"by some greater sorrow to drive out the less," saith Gordonius, as that his house is on fire, his best friends dead, his money stolen. [5675]"That he is made some great governor, or hath some honour, office, some inheritance is befallen him." He shall be a knight, a baron; or by some false accusation, as they do to such as have the hiccup, to make them forget it. St. Hierome, _lib. 2. epist. 16._ to Rusticus the monk, hath an instance of a young man of Greece, that lived in a monastery in Egypt, [5676]"that by no labour, no continence, no persuasion, could be diverted, but at last by this trick he was delivered. The abbot sets one of his convent to quarrel with him, and with some scandalous reproach or other to defame him before company, and then to come and complain first, the witnesses were likewise suborned for the plaintiff. The young man wept, and when all were against him, the abbot cunningly took his part, lest he should be overcome with immoderate grief: but what need many words? by this invention he was cured, and alienated from his pristine love-thoughts"--Injuries, slanders, contempts, disgraces--_spretaeque injuria formae_, "the insult of her slighted beauty," are very forcible means to withdraw men's affections, _contumelia affecti amatores amare desinunt_, as [5677]Lucian saith, lovers reviled or neglected, contemned or misused, turn love to hate; [5678]_redeam? Non si me obsecret_, "I'll never love thee more." _Egone illam, quae illum, quae me, quae non_? So Zephyrus hated Hyacinthus because he scorned him, and preferred his co-rival Apollo (Palephaetus _fab. Nar._), he will not come again though he be invited.

Tell him but how he was scoffed at behind his back, ('tis the counsel of Avicenna), that his love is false, and entertains another, rejects him, cares not for him, or that she is a fool; a nasty quean, a s.l.u.t, a vixen, a scold, a devil, or, which Italians commonly do, that he or she hath some loathsome filthy disease, gout, stone, strangury, falling sickness, and that they are hereditary, not to be avoided, he is subject to a consumption, hath the pox, that he hath three or four incurable tetters, issues; that she is bald, her breath stinks, she is mad by inheritance, and so are all the kindred, a hair-brain, with many other secret infirmities, which I will not so much as name, belonging to women. That he is a hermaphrodite, an eunuch, imperfect, impotent, a spendthrift, a gamester, a fool, a gull, a beggar, a wh.o.r.emaster, far in debt, and not able to maintain her, a common drunkard, his mother was a witch, his father hanged, that he hath a wolf in his bosom, a sore leg, he is a leper, hath some incurable disease, that he will surely beat her, he cannot hold his water, that he cries out or walks in the night, will stab his bedfellow, tell all his secrets in his sleep, and that n.o.body dare lie with him, his house is haunted with spirits, with such fearful and tragical things, able to avert and terrify any man or woman living, Gordonius, _cap. 20. part. 2._ hunc in modo consulit; _Paretur aliqua vetula turp.i.s.sima aspectu, c.u.m turpi et vili habitu: et portet subtus gremium pannum menstrualem, et dicat quod amica sua sit ebriosa, et quod mingat in lecto, et quod est epileptica et impudicia; et quod in corpore suo sunt excrescentiae enormes, c.u.m faetore anhelitus, et aliae enormitates, quibus vetulae sunt edoctae: si nolit his persuaderi, subito extrahat [5679]pannum menstrualem, coram facie portando, exclamando, talis est amica tua; et si ex his non demiserit, non est h.o.m.o, sed diabolus incarnatus_. Idem fere, Avicenna, _cap. 24, de cura Elis.h.i.+, lib. 3, Fen. 1. Tract. 4._ _Narrent res immundas vetulae, ex quibus abominationem incurrat, et res [5680]sordidas et, hoc a.s.siduent_. Idem Arcula.n.u.s _cap. 16. in 9. Rhasis_, &c.

Withal as they do discommend the old, for the better effecting a more speedy alteration, they must commend another paramour, _alteram inducere_, set him or her to be wooed, or woo some other that shall be fairer, of better note, better fortune, birth, parentage, much to be preferred, [5681]

_Invenies alium si te hic fastidit Alexis_, by this means, which Jason Pratensis wisheth, to turn the stream of affection another way, _Successore novo truditur omnis amor_; or, as Valesius adviseth, by [5682]subdividing to diminish it, as a great river cut into many channels runs low at last.

[5683]_Hortor et ut pariter binas habeatis amicas_, &c. If you suspect to be taken, be sure, saith the poet, to have two mistresses at once, or go from one to another: as he that goes from a good fire in cold weather is both to depart from it, though in the next room there be a better which will refresh him as much; there's as much difference of _haec_ as _hac ignis_; or bring him to some public shows, plays, meetings, where he may see variety, and he shall likely loathe his first choice: carry him but to the next town, yea peradventure to the next house, and as Paris lost Oenone's love by seeing Helen, and Cressida forsook Troilus by conversing with Diomede, he will dislike his former mistress, and leave her quite behind him, as [5684]Theseus left Ariadne fast asleep in the island of Dia, to seek her fortune, that was erst his loving mistress. [5685]_Nunc primum Dorida vetus amator contempsi_, as he said, Doris is but a dowdy to this.

As he that looks himself in a gla.s.s forgets his physiognomy forthwith, this flattering gla.s.s of love will be diminished by remove; after a little absence it will be remitted, the next fair object will likely alter it. A young man in [5686]Lucian was pitifully in love, he came to the theatre by chance, and by seeing other fair objects there, _mentis sanitatem recepit_, was fully recovered, [5687] "and went merrily home, as if he had taken a dram of oblivion." [5688]A mouse (saith an apologer) was brought up in a chest, there fed with fragments of bread and cheese, though there could be no better meat, till coming forth at last, and feeding liberally of other variety of viands, loathed his former life: moralise this fable by thyself.

Plato, in. his seventh book _De Legibus_, hath a pretty fiction of a city under ground, [5689]to which by little holes some small store of light came; the inhabitants thought there could not be a better place, and at their first coming abroad they might not endure the light, _aegerrime solem intueri_; but after they were accustomed a little to it, [5690]"they deplored their fellows' misery that lived under ground." A silly lover is in like state, none so fair as his mistress at first, he cares for none but her; yet after a while, when he hath compared her with others, he abhors her name, sight, and memory. 'Tis generally true; for as he observes, [5691]_Priorem flammam novus ignis extrudit; et ea multorum natura, ut praesentes maxime ament_, one fire drives out another; and such is women's weakness, that they love commonly him that is present. And so do many men; as he confessed, he loved Amye, till he saw Florial, and when he saw Cynthia, forgat them both: but fair Phillis was incomparably beyond, them all, Cloris surpa.s.sed her, and yet when he espied Amaryllis, she was his sole mistress; O divine Amaryllis: _quam procera, cupressi ad instar, quam elegans, quam decens_, &c. How lovely, how tall, how comely she was (saith Polemius) till he saw another, and then she was the sole subject of his thoughts. In conclusion, her he loves best he saw last. [5692]Triton, the sea-G.o.d, first loved Leucothoe, till he came in presence of Milaene, she was the commandress of his heart, till he saw Galatea: but (as [5693]she complains) he loved another eftsoons, another, and another. 'Tis a thing which, by Hierom's report, hath been usually practised. [5694]"Heathen philosophers drive out one love with another, as they do a peg, or pin with a pin. Which those seven Persian princes did to Ahasuerus, that they might requite the desire of Queen Vashti with the love of others." Pausanias in Eliacis saith, that therefore one Cupid was painted to contend with another, and to take the garland from him, because one love drives out another, [5695]_Alterius vires subtrahit alter amor_; and Tully, _3. Nat.

Deor._ disputing with C. Cotta, makes mention of three several Cupids, all differing in office. Felix Plater, in the first book of his observations, boasts how he cured a widower in Basil, a patient of his, by this stratagem alone, that doted upon a poor servant his maid, when friends, children, no persuasion could serve to alienate his mind: they motioned him to another honest man's daughter in the town, whom he loved, and lived with long after, abhorring the very name and sight of the first. After the death of Lucretia, [5696]Euryalus would admit of no comfort, till the Emperor Sigismund married him to a n.o.ble lady of his court, and so in short s.p.a.ce he was freed.

SUBSECT. III.--_By counsel and persuasion, foulness of the fact, men's, women's faults, miseries of marriage, events of l.u.s.t, &c._

As there be divers causes of this burning l.u.s.t, or heroical love, so there be many good remedies to ease and help; amongst which, good counsel and persuasion, which I should have handled in the first place, are of great moment, and not to be omitted. Many are of opinion, that in this blind headstrong pa.s.sion counsel can do no good.

[5697] "Quae enim res in se neque consilium neque modum Habet, ullo eam consilio regere non potes."

"Which thing hath neither judgment, or an end, How should advice or counsel it amend?"

[5698]_Quis enim modus adsit amori_? But, without question, good counsel and advice must needs be of great force, especially if it shall proceed from a wise, fatherly, reverent, discreet person, a man of authority, whom the parties do respect, stand in awe of, or from a judicious friend, of itself alone it is able to divert and suffice. Gordonius, the physician, attributes so much to it, that he would have it by all means used in the first place. _Amoveatur ab illa, consilio viri quem timet, ostendendo pericula saeculi, judicium inferni, gaudia Paradisi_. He would have some discreet men to dissuade them, after the fury of pa.s.sion is a little spent, or by absence allayed; for it is as intempestive at first, to give counsel, as to comfort parents when their children are in that instant departed; to no purpose to prescribe narcotics, cordials, nectarines, potions, Homer's nepenthes, or Helen's bowl, &c. _Non cessabit pectus tundere_, she will lament and howl for a season: let pa.s.sion have his course awhile, and then he may proceed, by foreshowing the miserable events and dangers which will surely happen, the pains of h.e.l.l, joys of Paradise, and the like, which by their preposterous courses they shall forfeit or incur; and 'tis a fit method, a very good means; for what [5699]Seneca said of vice, I say of love, _Sine magistro discitur, vix sine magistro deseritur_, 'tis learned of itself, but [5700]hardly left without a tutor. 'Tis not amiss therefore to have some such overseer, to expostulate and show them such absurdities, inconveniences, imperfections, discontents, as usually follow; which their blindness, fury, madness, cannot apply unto themselves, or will not apprehend through weakness; and good for them to disclose themselves, to give ear to friendly admonitions. "Tell me, sweetheart (saith Tryphena to a lovesick Charmides in [5701]Lucian), what is it that troubles thee?

peradventure I can ease thy mind, and further thee in thy suit;" and so, without question, she might, and so mayst thou, if the patient be capable of good counsel, and will hear at least what may be said.

If he love at all, she is either an honest woman or a wh.o.r.e. If dishonest, let him read or inculcate to him that 5. of Solomon's Proverbs, Ecclus. 26.

Ambros. _lib. 1. cap. 4._ in his book of Abel and Cain, Philo Judeus _de mercede mer_. Platina's _dial. in Amores_, Espencaeus, and those three books of Pet. Haedus _de contem. amoribus_, Aeneas Sylvius' tart Epistle, which he wrote to his friend Nicholas of Warthurge, which he calls _medelam illiciti amoris_ &c. [5702]"For what's a wh.o.r.e," as he saith, "but a poller of youth, a [5703]ruin of men, a destruction, a devourer of patrimonies, a downfall of honour, fodder for the devil, the gate of death, and supplement of h.e.l.l?" [5704]_Talis amor est laqueus animae_, &c., a bitter honey, sweet poison, delicate destruction, a voluntary mischief, _commixtum coenum, sterquilinium_. And as [5705]Pet. Aretine's Lucretia, a notable quean, confesseth: "Gluttony, anger, envy, pride, sacrilege, theft, slaughter, were all born that day that a wh.o.r.e began her profession; for," as she follows it, "her pride is greater than a rich churl's, she is more envious than the pox, as malicious as melancholy, as covetous as h.e.l.l. If from the beginning of the world any were _mala, pejor, pessima_, bad in the superlative degree, 'tis a wh.o.r.e; how many have I undone, caused to be wounded, slain! O Antonia, thou seest [5706]what I am without, but within, G.o.d knows, a puddle of iniquity, a sink of sin, a pocky quean." Let him now that so dotes meditate on this; let him see the event and success of others, Samson, Hercules, Holofernes, &c. Those infinite mischiefs attend it: if she be another man's wife he loves, 'tis abominable in the sight of G.o.d and men; adultery is expressly forbidden in G.o.d's commandment, a mortal sin, able to endanger his soul: if he be such a one that fears G.o.d, or have any religion, he will eschew it, and abhor the loathsomeness of his own fact. If he love an honest maid, 'tis to abuse or marry her; if to abuse, 'tis fornication, a foul fact (though some make light of it), and almost equal to adultery itself. If to marry, let him seriously consider what he takes in hand, look before ye leap, as the proverb is, or settle his affections, and examine first the party, and condition of his estate and hers, whether it be a fit match, for fortunes, years, parentage, and such other circ.u.mstances, _an sit sitae Veneris_. Whether it be likely to proceed: if not, let him wisely stave himself off at the first, curb in his inordinate pa.s.sion, and moderate his desire, by thinking of some other subject, divert his cogitations. Or if it be not for his good, as Aeneas, forewarned by Mercury in a dream, left Dido's love, and in all haste got him to sea,

[5707] "Mnestea, Surgestumque vocat fortemque Cloanthem, Cla.s.sem aptent taciti jubet"------

and although she did oppose with vows, tears, prayers, and imprecation.

[5708] ------"nullis ille movetur Fletibus, aut illas voces tractabilis audit;"

Let thy Mercury-reason rule thee against all allurements, seeming delights, pleasing inward or outward provocations. Thou mayst do this if thou wilt, _pater non deperit filiam, nec frater sororem_, a father dotes not on his own daughter, a brother on a sister; and why? because it is unnatural, unlawful, unfit. If he be sickly, soft, deformed, let him think of his deformities, vices, infirmities; if in debt, let him ruminate how to pay his debts: if he be in any danger, let him seek to avoid it: if he have any lawsuit, or other business, he may do well to let his love-matters alone and follow it, labour in his vocation whatever it is. But if he cannot so ease himself, yet let him wisely premeditate of both their estates; if they be unequal in years, she young and he old, what an unfit match must it needs be, an uneven yoke, how absurd and indecent a thing is it! as Lycinus in [5709]Lucian told Timolaus, for an old bald crook-nosed knave to marry a young wench; how odious a thing it is to see an old lecher! What should a bald fellow do with a comb, a dumb doter with a pipe, a blind man with a looking-gla.s.s, and thou with such a wife? How absurd it is for a young man to marry an old wife for a piece of good. But put case she be equal in years, birth, fortunes, and other qualities correspondent, he doth desire to be coupled in marriage, which is an honourable estate, but for what respects? Her beauty belike, and comeliness of person, that is commonly the main object, she is a most absolute form, in his eye at least, _Cui formam Paphia, et Charites tribuere decoram_; but do other men affirm as much? or is it an error in his judgment.

[5710] "Fallunt nos oculi vagique sensus, Oppressa ratione mentiuntur,"

"our eyes and other senses will commonly deceive us;" it may be, to thee thyself upon a more serious examination, or after a little absence, she is not so fair as she seems. _Quaedam videntur et non sunt_; compare her to another standing by, 'tis a touchstone to try, confer hand to hand, body to body, face to face, eye to eye, nose to nose, neck to neck, &c., examine every part by itself, then altogether, in all postures, several sites, and tell me how thou likest her. It may be not she, that is so fair, but her coats, or put another in her clothes, and she will seem all out as fair; as the [5711]poet then prescribes, separate her from her clothes: suppose thou saw her in a base beggar's weed, or else dressed in some old hirsute attires out of fas.h.i.+on, foul linen, coa.r.s.e raiment, besmeared with soot, colly, perfumed with opoponax, sagapenum, asafoetida, or some such filthy gums, dirty, about some indecent action or other; or in such a case as [5712]Bra.s.sivola, the physician, found Malatasta, his patient, after a potion of h.e.l.lebore, which he had prescribed: _Manibus in terram depositis, et ano versus caelum elevato (ac si videretur Socraticus ille Aristophanes, qui Geometricas figuras in terram scribens, tubera colligere videbatur) atram bilem in alb.u.m parietem injiciebat, adeoque totam cameram, et se deturpabat, ut_, &c., all to bewrayed, or worse; if thou saw'st her (I say) would thou affect her as thou dost? Suppose thou beheldest her in a [5713]

frosty morning, in cold weather, in some pa.s.sion or perturbation of mind, weeping, chafing, &c., rivelled and ill-favoured to behold. She many times that in a composed look seems so amiable and delicious, _tam scitula, forma_, if she do but laugh or smile, makes an ugly sparrow-mouthed face, and shows a pair of uneven, loathsome, rotten, foul teeth: she hath a black skin, gouty legs, a deformed crooked carca.s.s under a fine coat. It may be for all her costly tires she is bald, and though she seem so fair by dark, by candlelight, or afar off at such a distance, as Callicratides observed in [5714]Lucian, "If thou should see her near, or in a morning, she would appear more ugly than a beast;" [5715]_si diligenter consideres, quid per os et nares et caeteros corporis meatus egreditur, vilius sterquilinium nunquam vidisti_. Follow my counsel, see her undressed, see her, if it be possible, out of her attires, _furtivis nudatam coloribus_, it may be she is like Aesop's jay, or [5716]Pliny's cantharides, she will be loathsome, ridiculous, thou wilt not endure her sight: or suppose thou saw'st her, pale, in a consumption, on her death-bed, skin and bones, or now dead, _Cujus erat gratissimus amplexus_ (whose embrace was so agreeable) as Barnard saith, _erit horribilis aspectus; Non redolet, sed olet, quae, redolere solet_, "As a posy she smells sweet, is most fresh and fair one day, but dried up, withered, and stinks another." Beautiful Nireus, by that Homer so much admired, once dead, is more deformed than Thersites, and Solomon deceased as ugly as Marcolphus: thy lovely mistress that was erst [5717]_Charis charior ocellis_, "dearer to thee than thine eyes," once sick or departed, is _Vili vilior aestimata coeno_, "worse than any dirt or dunghill." Her embraces were not so acceptable, as now her looks be terrible: thou hadst better behold a Gorgon's head, than Helen's carca.s.s.

Some are of opinion, that to see a woman naked is able of itself to alter his affection; and it is worthy of consideration, saith [5718]Montaigne the Frenchman in his Essays, that the skilfulest masters of amorous dalliance, appoint for a remedy of venerous pa.s.sions, a full survey of the body; which the poet insinuates,

[5719] "Ille quod obscaenas in aperto corpore partes Viderat, in cursu qui fuit, haesit amor."

"The love stood still, that run in full career, When once it saw those parts should not appear."

It is reported of Seleucus, king of Syria, that seeing his wife Stratonice's bald pate, as she was undressing her by chance, he could never affect her after. Remundus Lullius, the physician, spying an ulcer or cancer in his mistress' breast, whom he so dearly loved, from that day following abhorred the looks of her. Philip the French king, as Neubrigensis, _lib. 4. cap. 24._ relates it, married the king of Denmark's daughter, [5720]"and after he had used her as a wife one night, because her breath stunk, they say, or for some other secret fault, sent her back again to her father." Peter Mattheus, in the life of Lewis the Eleventh, finds fault with our English [5721]chronicles, for writing how Margaret the king of Scots' daughter, and wife to Louis the Eleventh, French king, was _ob graveolentiam oris_, rejected by her husband. Many such matches are made for by-respects, or some seemly comeliness, which after honeymoon's past, turn to bitterness: for burning l.u.s.t is but a flash, a gunpowder pa.s.sion; and hatred oft follows in the highest degree, dislike and contempt.

[5722] ------"c.u.m se cutis arida laxat, Fiunt obscuri dentes"------

when they wax old, and ill-favoured, they may commonly no longer abide them,--_Jam gravis es n.o.bis_, Be gone, they grow stale, fulsome, loathsome, odious, thou art a beastly filthy quean,--[5723]_faciem Phoebe cacantis habes_, thou art _Saturni podex_, withered and dry, _insipida et vetula_,--[5724]_Te quia rugae turpant, et capitis nives_, (I say) be gone, [5725]_portae patent, proficiscere_.

Yea, but you will infer, your mistress is complete, of a most absolute form in all men's opinions, no exceptions can be taken at her, nothing may be added to her person, nothing detracted, she is the mirror of women for her beauty, comeliness and pleasant grace, inimitable, _merae deliciae, meri lepores_, she is _Myrothetium Veneris, Gratiarum pixis_, a mere magazine of natural perfections, she hath all the Veneres and Graces,--_mille faces et mille figuras_, in each part absolute and complete, [5726]_Laeta genas laeta os roseum, vaga lumina laeta_: to be admired for her person, a most incomparable, unmatchable piece, _aurea proles, ad simulachrum alicujus numinis composita, a Phoenix, vernantis aetatulae Venerilla_, a nymph, a fairy, [5727]like Venus herself when she was a maid, _nulli secunda_, a mere quintessence, _flores spirans et amarac.u.m, foeminae prodigium_: put case she be, how long will she continue? [5728]_Florem decoris singuli carpunt dies_: "Every day detracts from her person," and this beauty is _bonum fragile_, a mere flash, a Venice gla.s.s, quickly broken,

[5729] "Anceps forma bonum mortalibus, ------exigui donum breve temporis,"

it will not last. As that fair flower [5730]Adonis, which we call an anemone, flourisheth but one month, this gracious all-commanding beauty fades in an instant. It is a jewel soon lost, the painter's G.o.ddess, _fulsa veritas_, a mere picture. "Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vanity,"

Prov. x.x.xi. 30.

[5731] "Vitrea gemmula, fluxaque bullula, candida forma est, Nix, rosa, fumus, ventus et aura, nihil."

"A brittle gem, bubble, is beauty pale, A rose, dew, snow, smoke, wind, air, nought at all."

If she be fair, as the saying is, she is commonly a fool: if proud, scornful, _sequiturque superbia formam_, or dishonest, _rara est concordia formae, atque pudicitiae_, "can she be fair and honest too?" [5732] Aristo, the son of Agasicles, married a Spartan la.s.s, the fairest lady in all Greece next to Helen, but for her conditions the most abominable and beastly creature of the world. So that I would wish thee to respect, with [5733]Seneca, not her person but qualities. "Will you say that's a good blade which hath a gilded scabbard, embroidered with gold and jewels? No, but that which hath a good edge and point, well tempered metal, able to resist." This beauty is of the body alone, and what is that, but as [5734]

Gregory n.a.z.ianzen telleth us, "a mock of time and sickness?" or as Boethius, [5735]"as mutable as a flower, and 'tis not nature so makes us, but most part the infirmity of the beholder." For ask another, he sees no such matter: _Dic mihi per gratias quails tibi videtur_, "I pray thee tell me how thou likest my sweetheart," as she asked her sister in Aristenaetus, [5736]"whom I so much admire, methinks he is the sweetest gentleman, the properest man that ever I saw: but I am in love, I confess (_nec pudet fateri_) and cannot therefore well judge." But be she fair indeed, golden-haired, as Anacreon his Bathillus, (to examine particulars) she have [5737]_Flammeolos oculos, collaque lacteola_, a pure sanguine complexion, little mouth, coral lips, white teeth, soft and plump neck, body, hands, feet, all fair and lovely to behold, composed of all graces, elegances, an absolute piece,

[5738] "Lumina sint Melitae Junonia, dextra Minervae, Mamillae Veneris, sura maris dominae," &c.

Let [5739]her head be from Prague, paps out of Austria, belly from France, back from Brabant, hands out of England, feet from Rhine, b.u.t.tocks from Switzerland, let her have the Spanish gait, the Venetian tire, Italian compliment and endowments:

[5740] "Candida sideriis ardescant lumina flammis, Sudent colla rosas, et cedat crinibus aurum, Mellea purpurem depromant ora ruborem; Fulgeat, ac Venerem coelesti corpore vincat, Forma dearum omnis," &c.

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