Thyla. Part 13

Mr Beagle sighed. 'That's okay, Tessa,' he said. 'I'm sorry for snapping. I'm just tired, I suppose. Ms Hindmarsh had to go out unexpectedly to visit Mr Lord and she asked me to get some files for her. That's all.'

I didn't even bother to ask where the files were. He had none in his hand when he left the office just the book. He was lying.

'Ms Hindmarsh will be back this evening,' Mr Beagle continued. 'Don't forget it's the full moon tonight. Mrs Bush is very keen that you all get a chance to observe it through our new telescope.'

I nodded, ignoring the way my scars began to throb every time the full moon was mentioned. 'I'll be there,' I said, returning his lie.

Of course, I wouldn't be there. If the whole school was in one spot, observing the moon, there seemed no better time for me to escape and begin my investigations. No better time for me to go on a bushwalk.

'Glad to hear it, Miss Connolly,' he said. 'I'm glad to hear you're not foolish and rebellious. The world out there is scary, Tessa. It's best to be sensible, if you're a young girl. Now, if you'll excuse me ...'

And with that, Mr Beagle was gone.

I didn't have time to linger, though my meeting with Mr Beagle had given me many more things to think about, and an intensified sense of unease. I could reflect about it later. Ms Hindmarsh was not in her office, and so my plans had changed.

Rhiannah had gone for her bushwalk hours earlier. And I wanted to catch up.

It didn't take as long as I thought it would to catch up with Rhiannah.

As I walked towards room 36, I heard raised voices. I crept closer and saw that the door to our bedroom was not properly shut. I crouched down and listened. For a moment the voices were silent, and I worried that I had been caught. But then they spoke again.

It was Rhiannah, and she was with Perrin. I could tell from the scent. I was distracted, briefly, by the memory of his face; the feeling of his hand in mine ... but then I heard the tone of Rhiannah's voice, and it brought my thoughts sharply back into focus. Her voice wasn't jovial and joking, or kind and friendly. It was harsh and angry and, when I heard what the voice was talking about about, it became terrifying. 'She has the stripes. If what the book says is true if she is immortal then that can only mean one thing. She's a Thyla. She's a Thyla who has been sleeping in my bedroom sleeping in my bedroom for the past week. Do you know how that makes me feel?' for the past week. Do you know how that makes me feel?'

She was talking about me. Rhiannah was talking about me. And she called me Thyla. Thyla.

'And I believed her! Seriously, can you even believe how dumb I was? I bought her whole act of being human, of being a friend friend. I thought she'd lost her memory in the accident. Geez, Perrin, I thought she needed protecting! I thought: here was this new girl, this innocent human, just like Cat was. And, you know, Charlotte didn't like Cat either. She made her life h.e.l.l. I couldn't let that happen again. Can you believe it? I should have killed her in her sleep!'

My breath caught in my throat. Did Rhiannah just say what I thought she said? That she should have killed killed me? A cold sweat began to p.r.i.c.kle on my forehead. me? A cold sweat began to p.r.i.c.kle on my forehead.

'Rin, I know you don't mean that,' said Perrin. 'She's your friend.'

'She's a Thyla Thyla!' Rhiannah exclaimed. 'You know, the race that's been trying to wipe us out for millennia? Remember them?'

'If she'd been human, would that have been any better?' Perrin asked, his voice calm. 'Humans don't have the best track record with their treatment of our kind. Humans have sided with the Diemens in the past, and helped them become stronger. And you know, the Diemens are pretty d.a.m.n strong now, Rhiannah. If what Rha says is to be believed, we may just need need the Thylas on our side.' the Thylas on our side.'

'You really believe that?' asked Rhiannah, laughing bitterly.

'I believe what Rha says,' Perrin said, firmly. 'I believe there is something in this treaty idea.'

'You always believe what Rha says,' Rhiannah spat, and I pictured her rolling her eyes and crossing her arms. 'You wors.h.i.+p him. It's pathetic.'

'What he says makes sense!' Perrin exclaimed, his voice getting louder. There was a pause, and when he continued his voice was soft again; measured. 'You're just scared. We're all scared. But we don't need to be scared of Tessa. Trust me on that, Rin.'

Rhiannah's voice was soft now, too. 'I know. I never would have given her the book otherwise. It just kind of threw me for six, you know? I never expected to b.u.mp into a Thyla inside inside Cascade Falls.' Cascade Falls.'

'And I'm sure she never expected she'd be rooming with a Sarco either.'

Rhiannah sighed. 'Perrin, she barely knows about Thylas Thylas, let alone Sarcos. I think she's lost her memory. She keeps saying she doesn't know if she's done things before or eaten things before or whatever. Plus, she doesn't have a cuff, so she can't can't know who she is. No Sarco or Thyla in their right mind would go around among humans without a cuff, especially approaching a full moon. We may be able to switch in and out of this at will at other times of the month, but at a full moon? No, she really know who she is. No Sarco or Thyla in their right mind would go around among humans without a cuff, especially approaching a full moon. We may be able to switch in and out of this at will at other times of the month, but at a full moon? No, she really must must have lost her memory. Oh, geez! Poor Tessa! I don't know why I said that before. I was just angry. And hurt. And ... and scared.' have lost her memory. Oh, geez! Poor Tessa! I don't know why I said that before. I was just angry. And hurt. And ... and scared.'

'If she's lost her memory, then we don't need to be scared of her. We need to look out for her. It's not just approaching approaching a full moon, Rhiannah. It's a full moon a full moon, Rhiannah. It's a full moon tonight tonight.'

'I know. I don't know what to do about that.'

'We do the only thing we can do. We go to the forest. We protect ourselves the best we can. And we wait to see what happens.'

'But what about Tessa?' Rhiannah's voice was anxious now, and small. She sounded like a scared child.

'I don't know. I really don't. I want to protect her, but it's not like we we can be inside Cascade Falls when it's a full moon. It's too risky. And we can't take her with us either. Can you imagine taking a Thyla into Wellington Park with us on a full moon? One who doesn't know or has can be inside Cascade Falls when it's a full moon. It's too risky. And we can't take her with us either. Can you imagine taking a Thyla into Wellington Park with us on a full moon? One who doesn't know or has forgotten forgotten how to control her powers? One without a cuff to how to control her powers? One without a cuff to help help her? It would be a catastrophe. I'm just going to have to ask you to suggest she stays in your room tonight. Will you do that? For me?' her? It would be a catastrophe. I'm just going to have to ask you to suggest she stays in your room tonight. Will you do that? For me?'

'But what if someone finds her?' said Rhiannah. 'One of the humans?'

'If a human finds her on a full moon, pity that person, not Tessa.'

'We must have fought against her,' Rhiannah said, her voice sounding as though she was concentrating hard; straining to remember. 'That's the hardest thing. She would have been on the other side so many times, when I only knew her as a Thyla, not as a human, so I never recognised her. I keep telling myself I'm stupid, that I should have known.'

'You're not stupid, Rin. You couldn't have known. You never expected to find yourself sleeping with the enemy.'

'Very funny,' Rhiannah growled. 'And anyway, I thought you said she wasn't the enemy. I thought you said we should trust her. Why exactly do you think that, anyway? Is there something you're not telling me?'

'Don't worry, Rin. There's nothing you need to know,' Perrin said, firmly. 'Look, I gotta go, sis. Gotta get back to school. I'll catch you soon, okay?'

'Okay,' Rhiannah said, softly. 'You would tell me, though, wouldn't you? If there was was something I needed to know?' something I needed to know?'

'There's not,' said Perrin, quickly. 'I'll see you soon.'

I heard Perrin's heavy boots clomping towards the door. Although I wanted to stay; although I was desperate desperate to hear more, I did the only thing I could do. to hear more, I did the only thing I could do.

I ran, with the lightest of feet, down the hallway and away.

The grounds were now filled with girls. School had finished, and everyone was walking towards their lockers or to the dormitories. They were gossiping and laughing. It was as if I'd stepped into a parallel existence one where everything I had heard and everything I had discovered did not exist.

A world where everything was normal.

But even here I was still a freak. I still still stood out. stood out.

Even without my scars or being ... whatever it was I was, I stood out for running. I stood out for my casual clothes and tufty, unkempt hair. I stood out for the wild, anxious look on my face. Soon, everyone was staring at me.

And then, the whispers started.

'Look at her. She's so so weird.' weird.'

That was Inga. I saw her rolling her pale blue eyes.

Then, there was another whisper. 'She looks like she's homeless.'

I saw Jenna shaking her strawberry blonde hair and fixing me with a sneer of disgust.

Then finally I heard Charlotte pretending to whisper, 'I don't know why she was ever let into Cascade Falls in the first place. Daddy is too kind for his own good. She's so wild. She's insane. The sooner she leaves here, the better. We don't have room for people like that. She's a beast.'

My heart seemed to stop as a memory burst abruptly into my head. I was hiding outside an office door, clasping a basket of clean was.h.i.+ng. I was eavesdropping! There was a male voice, quiet and sounding as though the owner was quite upper crust. He was saying, 'We must eradicate these beasts. We must eradicate them if we are ever to fully control this colony.' 'We must eradicate these beasts. We must eradicate them if we are ever to fully control this colony.'

And then another voice. 'But, sir. The men say they are 'But, sir. The men say they are human.' human.'

'They are not human, Hopkins. They are beasts. Vermin. Freaks of nature. They are an unruly, disruptive influence. Surely as a gentleman yourself you understand that. Surely as a gentleman you will be on our side.'

'But they were here before us,' another, familiar, voice interjected. ' another, familiar, voice interjected. 'Excuse my impertinence but, if you dislike them so, why do you stay here?'

'Who is this man, Hopkins?' the first man growled. the first man growled.

'His name is Livingston,' said Hopkins. 'He is a guard here at the factory.'

'Some minor prison guard?' the first man sneered. the first man sneered. 'Why did you let him in here, Hopkins? Be off with you, man.' 'Why did you let him in here, Hopkins? Be off with you, man.'

I heard footsteps as the third man retreated though not completely. I didn't hear a door shut. He was hiding. Listening. Like I was. The first man proceeded, his voice quiet and menacing.

'Hopkins, you know that every day Victoria remains Queen is another day that our power is diminished. Soon, we will have no power at all in our motherland. The convicts are being s.h.i.+pped abroad at an alarming rate. In England our game is slowly disappearing. And where the game goes, so must we! And, who knows, perhaps on the other side of the world, our kind will thrive once more. This place is our refuge. It is not the best best choice, that much is certain, but it is our only choice. Our only option if we are to survive.' choice, that much is certain, but it is our only choice. Our only option if we are to survive.'

'And the beasts? They prevent your survival?'

'They have been intercepting our sport; stealing our game. Transforming it into their own kind. It is a horror, what they do. What we do is ... a kindness. You see that, don't you, Hopkins? We deal with the convict women much more humanely than they would be treated in the hands of the beasts.'

'You have our support, sir. You know that. We are on your side.'

'Your loyalty will be rewarded, Hopkins. Just be sure you keep your side of the bargain.'

'We will provide you with women, sir. As many as you need. Don't worry, they won't be missed.'

'I see now it was a grand idea appointing you as warden of this prison, Hopkins. You have done us proud. And for that, we will grant you the highest gift we can bestow.'

'What is that?'

'Immortality.'

I heard a door click quietly shut. The prison guard had left the room. I needed to run. I needed to hide. If the guard found out I had been eavesdropping ... but then, he had been eavesdropping too, hadn't he?

Still, I hid, curled up like a ball. I heard him run past. He was muttering to himself. 'They've gone mad,' 'They've gone mad,' he said. he said. 'They've all gone mad.' 'They've all gone mad.'

A darkness fell on my memory, and I was back in reality. I felt my body shaking. I didn't know what to do. I was surrounded by so many girls, all staring, all pointing, all whispering. I wanted to just sink through the ground and disappear.

Then there was another voice in my ear. A kinder one, saying, 'Come with me, Tessa.'

I turned around to see Ms Hindmarsh behind me, her arm outstretched. I had sought her and now she had found me.

I took her hand, pus.h.i.+ng back the tears that threatened to break free from my eyes.

'I am Tessa. I am strong. I do not cry,' I whispered to myself.

I let Ms Hindmarsh lead me away to safety.

Laurel and Erin were sitting outside Ms Hindmarsh's office. I was grateful for their kind, accepting faces. They were not staring at me as though I was a monster, like the others had been.

'Would you mind waiting here please, Tessa?' asked Ms Hindmarsh, indicating towards the empty seat beside Laurel. 'I won't be long.'

I nodded and sat down.

As Ms Hindmarsh's door clicked shut, Laurel turned to me and asked, 'So, what are you in for?'

'What do you mean?' I asked.

'Don't mind her,' said Erin, twiddling a strand of her crackly black hair between her thumb and forefinger. 'She's in a stupid mood. That's why we're we're here.' here.'

She shot Laurel a look that was dagger sharp.

'It completely was not my fault!' Laurel exclaimed, pouting.

'Oh yeah, somebody made made you scratch "Mr Beagle is a very bad dog" into your desk with a compa.s.s,' said Erin, shaking her head. you scratch "Mr Beagle is a very bad dog" into your desk with a compa.s.s,' said Erin, shaking her head.

She was trying to look serious, but her dimpled cheek let slip her true feelings.

'n.o.body made you laugh laugh when you saw it!' Laurel retorted, and the two of them collapsed into silly, helpless giggles. when you saw it!' Laurel retorted, and the two of them collapsed into silly, helpless giggles.

I wanted to laugh too, but it wouldn't come. Looking at them giggling, I felt as though I was made of stone like I was separated from their world, from happiness, by what I had learned and what it all might mean.

'You okay?' asked Erin, wiping tears from her eyes. 'You look a bit pale. Look, um, I heard something. Just gossip and, I mean, tell me if this is wrong, but I heard you had an accident before you came here? You were in hospital? Are you okay now?'

I nodded. 'I'm okay.'

Because, really, what else could I say? No, I'm not okay. I actually think I might be an immortal monster, and my roommate is an immortal monster, too, and she wants to kill me in my sleep. No, I'm not okay. I actually think I might be an immortal monster, and my roommate is an immortal monster, too, and she wants to kill me in my sleep.

No. Laurel and Erin were more kind and welcoming than anybody else at Cascade Falls had been, but I thought to borrow a phrase Vinnie often used when he got grumpy with you that might be 'pus.h.i.+ng it'.

'Really? Well, if you ever need anyone, we're here. It's just ...' Erin looked at Laurel, and Laurel shrugged, and nodded, as if to say 'go on'.

Erin looked back at me, her eyebrows scrunched together like two dark caterpillars kissing in the middle of her forehead. 'Okay, it's just that Laurel and I know it can be tough here. If you're an "untouchable". Princess Charlotte and those other cows think they own the place and, well, they kind of do. Mr Lord pretty much pays for everything, and the rest of their fathers are all big benefactors too. All of those girls' dads are Van Diemen Industries head honchos. Ours aren't. Our dads are just VDI labourers, and we only got in because of our scholars.h.i.+ps. So we're never going to be good enough for those posh b.i.t.c.hes ...'

As if Erin's words had conjured them, Charlotte and Inga turned into the hallway, shooting us sharpened steel glares. As they strutted by, Inga said without bothering to lower her voice 'When are they going to kick those girls out of our school? It would be a much better place without them.'