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His foot caught her in the thigh as she folded tighter, smaller, drawing her legs up. She was cold.
Then he reached down with both hands and pulled her erect by her hair. He slammed her head against the wall. Everything slid up in her sight as though running off the edge of the world. He slammed her head against the wall again, and she felt something go soft over her right ear.
When he tried to slam her a third time she reached out blindly for his face and ripped down with her nails. He howled in pain and she hurled herself forward, arms wrapping themselves around his waist. He stumbled backward and in a tangle of thras.h.i.+ng arms and legs they fell out onto the little balcony.
Beth landed on the bottom, feeling the window boxes jammed up against her spine and legs. She fought to get to her feet, and her nails hooked into his s.h.i.+rt under the open jacket, ripping. Then she was on her feet again and they struggled silently.
He whirled her around, bent her backward across the wrought-iron railing. Her face was turned outward.
They were standing in their windows, watching.
Through the fog she could see them watching. Through the fog she recognized their expressions. Through the fog she heard them breathing in unison, bellows breathing of expectation and wonder. Through the fog.
And the black man punched her in the throat. She gagged and started to black out and could not draw air into her lungs. Back, back, he bent her farther back and she was looking up, straight up, toward the ninth floor and higher....
Up there: eyes.
The words Ray Gleeson had said in a moment filled with what he had become, with the utter hopelessness and finality of the choice the city had forced on him, the words came back. You can't live in this city and survive unless you have protection...you can't live this way, like rats driven mad. without making the time right for some G.o.d- forsaken other kind of thing to be born...you can't do it without calling up some kind of awful...
G.o.d! A new G.o.d, an ancient G.o.d come again with the eyes and hunger of a child, a deranged blood G.o.d of fog and street violence. A G.o.d who needed wors.h.i.+pers and offered the choices of death as a victim or life as an eternal witness to the deaths of other chosen victims. A G.o.d to fit the times, a G.o.d of streets and people.
She tried to shriek, to appeal to Ray, to the director in the bedroom window of his ninth-floor apartment with his long-legged Philadelphia model beside him and his fingers inside her as they wors.h.i.+pped in their holiest of ways, to the others who had been at the party that had been Ray's offer of a chance to join their congregation. She wanted to be saved from having to make that choice.
But the black man had punched her in the throat, and now his hands were on her, one on her chest, the other in her face, the smell of leather filling her where the nausea could not. And she understood Ray had cared, had wanted her to take the chance offered; but she had come from a world of little white dormitories and Vermont countryside; it was not a real world. This was the real world and up there was the G.o.d who ruled this world, and she had rejected him, had said no to one of his priests and servitors. Save me!
Don't make me do it!
She knew she had to call out, to make appeal, to try and win the approbation of that G.o.d. I can't...save me!
She struggled and made terrible little mewling sounds trying to summon the words to cry out, and suddenly she crossed a line, and screamed up into the echoing courtyard with a voice Leona Ciarelli had never known enough to use.
"Him! Take him! Not me! I'm yours, I love you, I'm yours! Take him, not me, please not me, take him, take him, I'm yours!"
And the black man was suddenly lifted away, wrenched off her, and off the balcony, whirled straight up into the fog-thick air in the courtyard, as Beth sank to her knees on the ruined flower boxes.
She was half-conscious, and could not be sure she saw it just that way, but up he went, end over end, whirling and spinning like a charred leaf.
And the form took firmer shape. Enormous paws with claws and shapes that no animal she had ever seen had ever possessed, and the burglar, black, poor, terrified, whimpering like a whipped dog, was stripped of his flesh. His body was opened with a thin incision, and there was a rush as all the blood poured from him like a sudden cloudburst, and yet he was still alive, twitching with the involuntary horror of a frog's leg shocked with an electric current. Twitched, and twitched again as he was torn piece by piece to shreds. Pieces of flesh and bone and half a face with an eye blinking furiously, cascaded down past Beth, and hit the cement below with sodden thuds. And still he was alive, as his organs were squeezed and musculature and bile and s.h.i.+t and skin were rubbed, sandpapered together and let fall. It went on and on, as the death of Leona Ciarelli had gone on and on, and she understood with the blood-knowledge of survivors at any cost that the reason the witnesses to the death of Leona Ciarelli had done nothing was not that they had been frozen with horror, that they didn't want to get involved, or that they were inured to death by years of television slaughter.
They were wors.h.i.+ppers at a black ma.s.s the city had demanded be staged; not once, but a thousand times a day in this insane asylum of steel and stone.
Now she was on her feet, standing half-naked in her ripped nightgown, her hands tightening on the wrought-iron railing, begging to see more, to drink deeper.
Now she was one of them, as the pieces of the night's sacrifice fell past her, bleeding and screaming.
Tomorrow the police would come again, and they would question her, and she would say how terrible it had been, that burglar, and how she had fought, afraid he would rape her and kill her, and how he had fallen, and she had no idea how he had been so hideously mangled and ripped apart, but a seven-story fall, after all...
Tomorrow she would not have to worry about walking in the streets, because no harm could come to her. Tomorrow she could even remove the police lock. Nothing in the city could do her any further evil, because she had made the only choice. She was now a dweller in the city, now wholly and richly a part of it. Now she was taken to the bosom of her G.o.d.
She felt Ray beside her, standing beside her, holding her, protecting her, his hand on her naked backside, and she watched the fog swirl up and fill the courtyard, fill the city, fill her eyes and her soul and her heart with its power. As Ray's naked body pressed tightly inside her, she drank deeply of the night, knowing whatever voices she heard from this moment forward would be the voices not of whipped dogs, but those of strong, meat- eating beasts.
At last she was unafraid, and it was so good, so very good not to be afraid.
"When inward life dries up, when feeling decreases and apathy increases, when one cannot affect or even genuinely touch another person, violence flares up as a daimonic necessity for contact, a mad drive forcing touch in the most direct way possible."
--Rollo May, Love and Will
G.o.d, in the latest, chrome-plated, dual-carb, chopped & channeled, eight-hundred-horsepowered incarnation.
G.o.d's unspoken name is Vroooom!
Along the Scenic Route
The blood-red Mercury with the twin-mounted 7.6 mm Spandaus cut George off as he was s.h.i.+fting lanes. The Merc cut out sharply, three cars behind George, and the driver decked it. The boom of his gas-turbine engine got through George's baffling system without difficulty, like a fist in the ear. The Merc sprayed JP-4 gook and water in a wide fan from its jet nozzle and cut back in, a matter of inches in front of George's Chevy Piranha.
George slapped the selector control on the dash, lighting YOU STUPID b.a.s.t.a.r.d, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING and I HOPE YOU CRASH & BURN, YOU SON OF A b.i.t.c.h. Jessica moaned softly with uncontrolled fear, but George could not hear her: he was screaming obscenities.
George kicked it into Overplunge and depressed the selector b.u.t.ton extending the rotating buzzsaws. Dallas razors, they were called, in the repair shoppes. But the crimson Merc pulled away doing an easy 115.
"I'll get you, you beaver-sucker!" he howled.
The Piranha jumped, surged forward. But the Merc was already two dozen car- lengths down the Freeway. Adrenaline pumped through George's system. Beside him, Jessica put a hand on his arm. "Oh, forget it, George; it's just some young snot," she said.
Always conciliatory.
"My masculinity's threatened," he murmured, and hunched over the wheel.
Jessica looked toward heaven, wis.h.i.+ng a bolt of lightning had come from that location many months past, striking Dr. Yasimir directly in his Freud, long before George could have picked up psychiatric justifications for his awful temper.
"Get me Collision Control!" George snarled at her.
Jessica shrugged, as if to say here we go again, and dialed CC on the peek. The smiling face of the Freeway Sector Control Operator blurred green and yellow, then came into sharp focus. "Your request, sir?"
"Clearance for duel, Highway 101, northbound."
"Your license number, sir?"
"XUPD 88321," George said. He was scanning the Freeway, keeping the blood- red Mercury in sight, obstinately refusing to stud on the tracking sights.
"Your proposed opponent, sir?"
"Red Mercury GT. '88 model."
"License, sir. "
"Just a second." George pressed the stud for the instant replay and the last ten miles rolled back on the movieola. He ran it forward again till he caught the instant the Merc had pa.s.sed him, stopped the film, and got the number. "MFCS 909090"
"One moment, sir."
George fretted behind the wheel. "Now what the h.e.l.l's holding her up? Whenever you want service, they've got problems. But boy, when it comes tax time--"
The Operator came back and smiled. "I've checked our master Sector grid, sir, and I find authorization may be permitted, but I am required by law to inform you that your proposed opponent is more heavily armed than yourself. "
George licked his lips. "What's he running?" "Our records indicate 7.6 mm Spandau equipment, bulletproof screens and coded optionals."
George sat silently. His speed dropped. The tachometer fluttered, settled.
"Let him go, George," Jessica said. "You know he'd take you."
Two blotches of anger spread on George's cheeks. "Oh, yeah!?!" He howled at the Operator, "Get me a confirm on that Mercury, Operator!"
She blurred off, and George decked the Piranha; it leaped forward. Jessica sighed with resignation and pulled the drawer out from beneath her bucket. She unfolded the g- suit and began stretching into it. She said nothing, but continued to shake her head.
"We'll see!" George said.
"Oh, George, when will you ever grow up?
He did not answer, but his nostrils flared with barely restrained anger.
The Operator smeared back and said, "Opponent confirms, sir. Freeway Underwriters have already cross-filed you as mutual beneficiaries. Please observe standard traffic regulations, and good luck, sir."
She vanished, and George set the Piranha on sleepwalker as he donned his own g- suit. He overrode the sleeper and was back on manual in moments.
"Now, you stuffer, now let's see!" 100, 110, 120.
He was gaining rapidly on the Merc now. As the Chevy hit 120, the mastercomp flashed red and suggested crossover. George punched the selector and the telescoping arms of the buzzsaws retracted into the axles, even as the buzzsaws stopped whirling. In a moment they had been drawn back in, now merely fancy decorations in the hubcaps. The wheels retracted into the underbody of the Chevy and the air-cus.h.i.+on took over. Now the Chevy skimmed along, two inches above the roadbed of the Freeway.
Ahead, George could see the Merc also crossing over to aircus.h.i.+on. 120. 135.
150.
"George, this is crazy!" Jessica said, her face in that characteristic shrike expression. "You're no hot-rodder, George. You're a family man, and this is the family car!"
George chuckled nastily. "I've had it with these fuzzfaces. Last year...you remember last year?...you remember when that punk stuffer ran us into the abutment? I swore I'd never put up with that kind of thing again. Why'd'you think I had all the optionals installed?"
Jessica opened the tambour doors of the glove compartment and slid out the service tray. She unplugged the jar of anti-flash salve and began spreading it on her face and hands. "I knew I shouldn't have let you put that laser thing in this car!" George chuckled again. Fuzzfaces, punks, rodders!
George felt the Piranha surge forward, the big reliable stirling engine recycling the hot air for more and more efficient thrust. Unlike the Merc's inefficient kerosene system, there was no exhaust emission from the nuclear power plant, the external combustion engine almost noiseless, the big radiator tailfin in the rear dissipating the tremendous heat, stabilizing the car as it swooshed along, two inches off the roadbed.
George knew he would catch the blood-red Mercury. Then one smarta.s.s punk was going to learn he couldn't flout law and order by running decent citizens off the freeways!
"Get me my gun," George said. Jessica shook her head with exasperation, reached under George's bucket, pulled out his drawer and handed him the bulky.45 automatic in its breakaway upside-down shoulder rig. George studded in the sleeper, worked his arms into the rig, tested the oiled leather of the holster, and when he was satisfied, returned the Piranha to manual.
"Oh, G.o.d," Jessica said, "John Dillinger rides again."
"Listen!" George shouted, getting more furious with each stupidity she offered.
"If you can't be of some help to me, just shut your d.a.m.ned mouth. I'd put you out and come back for you, but I'm in a duel...can you understand that? I'm in a duel!" She murmured a yes, George, and fell silent.
There was a transmission queep from the transceiver. George studded it on. No picture. Just vocal. It had to be the driver of the Mercury, up ahead of them. Beaming directly at one another's antennae, using a tightbeam directional, they could keep in touch: it was a standard trick used by rods to rattle their opponents.
"Hey, Boze, you not really gonna custer me, are you? Back'm, Boze. No bad trips, true. The kid'll drop back, hang a couple of biggies on ya, just to teach ya little lesson, letcha swimaway." The voice of the driver was hard, mirthless, the ugly sound of a driver used to being challenged.
"Listen, you young snot," George said, grating his words, trying to sound more menacing than he felt, "I'm going to teach you the lesson!"
The Merc's driver laughed raucously.
"Boze, you de-mote me, true!"
"And stop calling me a bozo, you lousy little degenerate!"
"Ooooo-weeee, got me a thrasher this time out. Okay, Boze, you be custer an' I'll play arrow. Good sh.e.l.ls, baby Boze!"
The finalizing queep sounded, and George gripped the wheel with hands that went knuckle-white. The Merc suddenly shot away from him. He had been steadily gaining, but now as though it had been springloaded, the Mercury burst forward, spraying gook and water on both sides of the forty-foot lanes they were using. "Cut in his afterburner,"
George snarled. The driver of the Mercury had injected water into the exhaust for added thrust through the jet nozzle. The boom of the Merc's big, noisy engine hit him, and George studded in the rear-mounted propellers to give him more speed. 175. 185. 195.
He was crawling up the line toward the Merc. Gaining, gaining. Jessica pulled out her drawer and unfolded her crash-suit. It went on over the g-suit, and she let George know what she thought of his turning their Sunday Drive into a kamikaze duel.
He told her to stuff, and did a sleeper, donned his own crash-suit, applied flash salve, and lowered the bangup helmet onto his head.
Back on manual he crawled, crawled, till he was only fifty yards behind the Mercury, the gas-turbine vehicle sharp in his tinted winds.h.i.+eld. "Put on your goggles...I'm going to show that punk who's a bozo...."
He pressed the stud to open the laser louvers. The needle-nosed gla.s.s tube peered out from its bay in the Chevy's hood. George read the power drain on his dash. The MHD power generator used to drive the laser was charging. He remembered what the salesman at Chick Williams Chevrolet had told him, pridefully, about the laser gun, when George had inquired about the optional.
Dynamite feature, Mr. Jackson. Absolutely sensational. Works off a magneto hydro dynamic power generator. Latest thing in defense armament. You know, to achieve sufficient potency from a CO2 laser, you'd need a gla.s.s tube a mile long. Well, sir, we both know that's impractical, to say the least, so the project engineers at Chevy 's big Bombay plant developed the "stack" method. Gla.s.s rods baffled with mirrors--360 feet of stack, the length of a football field...plus end-zones. Use it three ways. Punch a hole right through their tires at any speed under a hundred and twenty. If they're running a GT. you can put that hole right into the kerosene fuel tank, blow them off the road. Or, if they're running a stirling, just heat the radiator. When the radiator gets hotter than the engine, the whole works shuts down. Dynamite. Also...and this is with proper CC authorization, you can go straight for the old jugular. Use the beam on the driver. Makes a neat hole.
Dynamite!
"I'll take it," George murmured.
"What did you say?" Jessica asked.
"Nothing."
"George, you're a family man, not a rodder!"
"Stuff it!"
Then he was sorry he'd said it. She meant well. It was simply that...well, a man had to work hard to keep his b.a.l.l.s. He looked sidewise at her. Wearing the Armadillo crash-suit, with its overlapping discs of ceramic material, she looked like a ferryflight pilot. The bangup hat hid her face. He wanted to apologize, but the moment had arrived.