The Complete Poems of Sir Thomas Moore Part 200

We've the _babies_ in _them_, and the _thunder_ in _you_!

The following trifles, having enjoyed in their circulation through the newspapers all the celebrity and length of life to which they were ent.i.tled, would have been suffered to pa.s.s quietly into oblivion without pretending to any further distinction, had they not already been published, in a collective form, both in London and Paris, and, in each case, been mixed up with a number of other productions, to which, whatever may be their merit, the author of the following pages has no claim. A natural desire to separate his own property, worthless as it is, from that of others, is, he begs to say, the chief motive of the publication of this volume.

TO SIR HUDSON LOWE.

_effare causam nominis, utrumne mores hoc tui nomen dedere, an nomen hoc secuta morum regula_. AUSONIUS.

1816.

Sir Hudson Lowe, Sir Hudson _Low_, (By name, and ah! by nature so) As thou art fond of persecutions, Perhaps thou'st read, or heard repeated, How Captain Gulliver was treated, When thrown among the Lilliputians.

They tied him down--these little men did-- And having valiantly ascended Upon the Mighty Man's protuberance, They did so strut!--upon my soul, It must have been extremely droll To see their pigmy pride's exuberance!

And how the doughty mannikins Amused themselves with sticking pins And needles in the great man's breeches: And how some _very_ little things, That past for Lords, on scaffoldings Got up and worried him with speeches,

Alas, alas! that it should happen To mighty men to be caught napping!-- Tho' different too these persecutions; For Gulliver, _there_, took the nap, While, _here_, the _Nap_, oh sad mishap, Is taken by the Lilliputians!

AMATORY COLLOQUY BETWEEN BANK AND GOVERNMENT.

1826.

BANK.

Is all then forgotten? those amorous pranks You and I in our youth, my dear Government, played; When you called me the fondest, the truest of Banks, And enjoyed the endearing _advances_ I made!

When left to ourselves, unmolested and free, To do all that a das.h.i.+ng young couple should do, A law against _paying_ was laid upon me, But none against _owing_, dear helpmate, on you.

And is it then vanisht?--that "hour (as Oth.e.l.lo So happily calls it) of Love and _Direction_?"

And must we, like other fond doves, my dear fellow, Grow good in our old age and cut the connection?

GOVERNMENT.

Even so, my beloved Mrs. Bank, it must be; This paying in cash plays the devil with wooing: We've both had our swing, but I plainly foresee There must soon be a stop to our _bill_ing and cooing.

Propagation in reason--a small child or two-- Even Reverend Malthus himself is a friend to; The issue of some folks is moderate and few-- But _ours_, my dear corporate Bank, there's no end to!

So--hard tho' it be on a pair, who've already Disposed of so many pounds, s.h.i.+llings and pence; And in spite of that pink of prosperity, Freddy,[1]

So lavish of cash and so sparing of sense--

The day is at hand, my Papyria[2] Venus, When--high as we once used to carry our capers-- Those soft _billet-doux_ we're now pa.s.sing between us, Will serve but to keep Mrs. Coutts in curl-papers:

And when--if we _still_ must continue our love, (After all that has past)--our amour, it is clear, Like that which Miss Danae managed with Jove, Must all be transacted in _bullion_, my dear!

_February, 1826_.

[1] Honorable Fredrick Robinson.

[2] So called, to distinguish her from the Aure or _Golden_ Venus.

DIALOGUE BETWEEN A SOVEREIGN AND A ONE POUND NOTE.

_"o ego non felix, quam tu fugis, ut pavet acres agna lupos, capreaeque leones."_--HOR.

Said a Sovereign to a Note, In the pocket of his coat, Where they met in a neat purse of leather, "How happens it, I prithee, "That, tho' I'm wedded _with_ thee, "Fair Pound, we can never live together?

"Like your s.e.x, fond of _change_ "With Silver you can range, "And of lots of young sixpences be mother; "While with _me_--upon my word, "Not my Lady and my Lord "Of Westmouth see so little of each other!"

The indignant Note replied (Lying crumpled by his side), "Shame, shame, it is _yourself_ that roam, Sir-- "One cannot look askance, "But, whip! you're off to France, "Leaving nothing but old rags at home, Sir.

"Your scampering began "From the moment Parson Van, "Poor man, made us _one_ in Love's fetter; "'For better or for worse'

"Is the usual marriage curse, "But ours is all 'worse' and no 'better.'

"In vain are laws past, "There's nothing holds you fast, "Tho' you know, sweet Sovereign, I adore you-- "At the smallest hint in life, "You forsake your lawful wife, "As _other_ Sovereigns did before you.

"I flirt with Silver, true-- "But what can ladies do, "When disowned by their natural protectors?

"And as to falsehood, stuff!

"I shall soon be _false_ enough, "When I get among those wicked Bank Directors."

The Sovereign, smiling on her, Now swore upon his honor, To be henceforth domestic and loyal; But, within an hour or two, Why--I sold him to a Jew, And he's now at No. 10, Palais Royal.