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"Pardon me," says Miss Hampton, "but just who is Vee?"
"Eh?" says I, pinkin' up. "Why, in my case, she's the only girl."
"Ah-ha!" says she. "So you--er----"
"Uh-huh!" says I. "I've come near bein' ditched myself. And Mr. Robert he's helped out more'n once. So this looked like my cue to hand back something. We thought maybe the roses would kind of patch things up.
Say, how about it, Miss Hampton? Suppose he hadn't b.o.o.bed it this way, wouldn't there be a show of----"
"You absurd youth!" says she, liftin' both hands protestin', but failin'
to smother that smile.
And say, when it's aimed straight at you so you get the full benefit, that's some winnin' smile of hers--sort of genuine and folksy, you know!
It got me. Why, I felt like I'd been put on her list of old friends. And I grins back.
"It wa'n't a case of another party, was it?" says I.
She laughs and shakes her head.
"Or an old watch-dog aunt, eh?" I goes on.
"Whatever made you think of that?" says she.
"You ought to see the one that stands guard over Vee," says I. "But how was it, anyway, that Mr. Robert got himself in wrong with you?"
"How?" says Miss Hampton, restin' her perky chin on one knuckle and studyin' the rug pattern. "Why, I think it must have been--well, perhaps it was my fault, after all. You see, when I left for Italy we were very good friends. And over there it was all so new to me,--Italian life, our villa hung on a mountainside overlooking that wonderful blue sea, the people I met, everything,--I wrote to him, oh, pages and pages, about all I did or saw. He must have been horribly bored reading them. I didn't realize until--but there! We'll not go into that. I stopped, that's all."
"Huh!" says I.
"So it's all over," says she. "Only, when I thought he had sent the roses, of course I was pleased. But now that he has taken such pains to prove that he didn't----"
She ends with a shoulder shrug.
"Say, Miss Hampton," I breaks in, "you leave it to me."
"But there isn't anything to leave," says she, "not a shred! Sometime, though, I hope I may meet your Miss Vee. May I?"
"I should guess!" says I. "Why, she thinks you're a star! We both do."
"Thank you, Torchy," says she. "I'm glad someone approves of me.
Good-by." And we shakes hands friendly at the door.
It was long after five by that time; but I made a break back to the office. Had to get the floor janitor to let me in. I was glad, though, to have the place to myself.
What I was after was a peek at some back letter files. Course I wa'n't sure he could be such a chump; but, knowin' somethin' about his habits along the correspondence line, I meant to settle the point. And, fis.h.i.+n'
out Mr. Robert's personal book, I begun the hunt. I had the right dope, too.
"The lobster!" says I.
There it was, all typed out neat, "My Dear Miss Hampton." And dictated!
Much as ten lines, too! It starts real chatty and familiar with, "Yours of the 16th inst. at hand," just like he always does, whether he's closin' a million-dollar deal or payin' a tailor's bill. He goes on to confide to her how the weather's beastly, business on the fritz, and how he's just ordered a new sixty-footer that he hopes will be in commission for the July regattas.
A hot billy-doo to a young lady he's supposed to be clean nutty over, one that had been sittin' up nights writin' on both sides of half a dozen sheets to him! I found four or five more just like it, the last one bein' varied a little by startin', "Yours of the 5th inst. still at hand." Do you wonder she quit?
If this had been a letter-writin' compet.i.tion, I'd have thrown up both hands; but it wa'n't.
I'd seen Mr. Robert gazin' mushy at that picture of her, and I'd watched Miss Hampton when she was tellin' me about him. Only they was short-circuited somewhere. And it seemed like a blamed shame.
Half an hour more and I'd located Mr. Robert at his club.
He ain't very enthusiastic, either, when one of the doormen tows me into the corner of the loungin' room where he's sittin' behind a tall gla.s.s gazin' moody at nothin' in particular.
"I suppose you told her all about it!" says he.
"And then a few," says I.
"Well?" says he sort of hopeless.
"Verdict for the defense," says I. "I didn't even have to produce the florist's receipt."
"Then that's settled," says he, sighin'.
"You couldn't have made the job more complete if you'd submitted affidavits," says I. "And if you don't mind my sayin' so, Mr. Robert, when it comes to the Romeo stuff, you're ten points off, with no bids."
Course that gets a squirm out of him, like I hoped it would. But he don't blow out a fuse or anything. "Naturally," says he, "I am charmed to hear such a frank estimate of myself. But suppose I am simply trying to avoid the--the Romeo stuff, as you put it?"
"Gwan!" says I. "You're only kiddin' yourself. Come now, ain't you as strong for Miss Hampton as ever?"
He stiffens up for a second; but then his shoulders sag. "Torchy," says he, "your perceptions are altogether too acute. I admit it. But what's the use? As you have so clearly pointed out, this little affair of mine seems to be quite thoroughly ended."
"It is if you let things slide as they stand," says I.
"Eh?" says he, sort of eager. "You mean that she--that if----"
"Say," I breaks in, "do you want it straight from a rank amateur? Then here goes. You don't gen'rally wait to have things handed to you on a tray, do you? You ain't that kind. You go after 'em. And the harder you want 'em the quicker you are on the grab. You don't stop to ask whether you deserve 'em or not, either. You just stretch your fingers and sing out, 'Hey, that's mine!' And if somebody or something's in the way, you give 'em the shoulder. Well, that's my dope in this case. You ain't goin' to get a young lady like Miss Hampton by doin' the long-distance mope. You got to buck up. Rush her off her feet!"
"By Jove, though, Torchy," says he, bangin' his fist down on the table, "I believe you're right! And I do want her. I've been afraid to say it, that's all. But now----"
He squares his shoulders and sets his jaw solid.
"That's the slant!" says I. "And the sooner the quicker, you know."
"Yes, yes!" says he, jumpin' up. "Tonight! I--I'll write to her at once."
"Ah, squiffle!" says I, indicatin' deep disgust.
Mr. Robert gazes at me astonished. "I beg pardon!" says he.
"Don't be a nut!" says I. "Excuse me if I seem to throw out any hints, but maybe letter writin' ain't your long suit. Is it?"