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"Please G.o.d, I will."
The quiet energy of Mac's last words produced a momentary silence.
Charlie thoughtfully studied the carpet; Archie, who had been absently poking the fire, looked over at Mac as if he thanked him again; and Steve, forgetting his self-conceit, began to wonder if it was not possible to improve himself a little for Kitty's sake. Only a minute; for young men do not give much time to thoughts of this kind, even when love stirs up the n.o.blest impulses within them. To act rather than to talk is more natural to most of them, as Charlie's next question showed; for, having the matter much at heart, he ventured to ask in an offhand way, as he laughed and twirled his cue,--
"Do you intend to reach the highest point of perfection before you address one of the fair saints, or shall you ask her to lend a hand somewhere short of that?"
"As it takes a long lifetime to do what I plan, I think I shall ask some good woman 'to lend a hand' when I've got any thing worth offering her. Not a saint, for I never shall be one myself, but a gentle creature who will help me, as I shall try to help her; so that we can go on together, and finish our work hereafter, if we haven't time to do it here."
If Mac had been a lover, he would not have discussed the subject in this simple and sincere fas.h.i.+on, though he might have felt it far more deeply; but being quite heart-free he frankly showed his interest, and, curiously enough, out of his wise young head unconsciously gave the three lovers before him counsel which they valued, because he practised what he preached.
"Well, I hope you'll find her!" said Charlie, heartily, as he went back to his game.
"I think I shall," and, while the others played, Mac lay staring at the window-curtain, as contentedly as if, through it, he beheld "a dream of fair women," from which to choose his future mate.
A few days after this talk in the billiard-room, Kitty went to call upon Rose; for, as she was about to enter the family, she felt it her duty to become acquainted with all its branches. This branch, however, she cultivated more a.s.siduously than any other, and was continually running in to confer with "Cousin Rose," whom she considered the wisest, dearest, kindest girl ever created. And Rose, finding that, in spite of her flighty head, Kitty had a good heart of her own, did her best to encourage all the new hopes and aspirations springing up in it under the warmth of the first genuine affection she had ever known.
"My dear, I want to have some serious conversation with you upon a subject in which I take an interest for the first time in my life,"
began Miss Kitty, seating herself and pulling off her gloves, as if the subject was one which needed a firm grasp.
"Tell away, and don't mind if I go on working, as I want to finish this job to-day," answered Rose, with a long-handled paint-brush in her hand, and a great pair of shears at her side.
"You are always so busy! What is it now? Let me help: I can talk faster when I'm doing something," which seemed hardly possible; for Kitty's tongue went like a mill-clapper at all hours.
"Making picture-books for my sick babies at the hospital. Pretty work, isn't it? You cut out, and I'll paste them on these squares of gay cambric: then we just tie up a few pages with a ribbon; and there is a nice, light, durable book for the poor dears to look at as they lie in their little beds."
"A capital idea. Do you go there often? How ever do you find the time for such things?" asked Kitty, busily cutting from a big sheet the touching picture of a parent bird with a red head and a blue tail, offering what looked like a small boa-constrictor to one of its nestlings; a fat young squab with a green head, yellow body, and no tail at all.
"I have plenty of time now I don't go out so much; for a party uses up two days generally,--one to prepare for it, and one to get over it, you know."
"People think it is so odd of you to give up society all of a sudden.
They say you have 'turned pious,' and it is owing to your peculiar bringing up. I always take your part, and say it is a pity other girls haven't as sensible an education; for I don't know one who is as satisfactory on the whole as you are."
"Much obliged. You may also tell people I gave up gayety because I valued health more. But I haven't forsworn every thing of the kind, Kit. I go to concerts and lectures, and all sorts of early things, and have nice times at home, as you know. I like fun as well as ever: but I'm getting on, you see, and must be preparing a little for the serious part of life; one never knows when it may come," said Rose, thoughtfully, as she pasted a squirrel upside-down on the pink cotton page before her.
"That reminds me of what I wanted to say. If you'll believe me, my dear, Steve has got that very idea into his head! Did you or Mac put it there?" asked Kitty, industriously clas.h.i.+ng her shears.
"No, I've given up lecturing the boys lately: they are so big now they don't like it, and I fancy I'd got into a way that was rather tiresome."
"Well, then, _he_ is 'turning pious' too. And what is very singular, I like it. Now don't smile: I really do; and I want to be getting ready for the 'serious part of life,' as you call it. That is, I want to grow better as fast as I can; for Steve says he isn't half good enough for me. Just think of that!"
Kitty looked so surprised and pleased and proud, that Rose felt no desire to laugh at her sudden fancy for sobriety, but said in her most sympathetic tone,--
"I'm very glad to hear it; for it shows that he loves you in the right way."
"Is there more than one way?"
"Yes, I fancy so; because some people improve so much after they fall in love, and others do not at all. Have you never observed that?"
"I never learned how to observe. Of course, I know that some matches turn out well and some don't; but I never thought much about it."
"Well, I have; for I was rather interested in the subject lately, and had a talk with Aunt Jessie and uncle about it."
"Gracious! you don't talk to them about such things, do you?"
"Yes, indeed; I ask any question I like, and always get a good answer.
It is such a nice way to learn, Kitty; for you don't have to poke over books, but as things come along you talk about them, and remember; and when they are spoken of afterward you understand and are interested, though you don't say a word," explained Rose.
"It must be nice; but I haven't any one to do so for me. Papa is too busy, and mamma always says when I ask questions, 'Don't trouble your head with such things, child;' so I don't. What did you learn about matches turning out well? I'm interested in that, because I want mine to be quite perfect in all respects."
"After thinking it over, I came to the conclusion that uncle _was_ right, and it is _not_ always safe to marry a person just because you love him," began Rose, trying to enlighten Kitty without betraying herself.
"Of course not: if they haven't money or are bad. But otherwise I don't see what more is needed," said Kitty, wonderingly.
"One should stop and see if it is a wise love, likely to help both parties, and wear well; for you know it ought to last all one's lifetime, and it is very sad if it doesn't."
"I declare it quite scares me to think of it; for I don't usually go beyond my wedding-day in making plans. I remember, though, that when I was engaged the first time (you don't know the man: it was just after you went away, and I was only sixteen), some one very ill-naturedly said I should 'marry in haste and repent at leisure;' and that made me try to imagine how it would seem to go on year after year with Gustavus (who had a dreadful temper, by the way), and it worried me so to think of it that I broke the engagement, and was so glad ever afterward."
"You were a wise girl; and I hope you'll do it again, if you find, after a time, that you and Steve do not truly trust and respect as well as love one another. If you don't, you'll be miserable when it is too late, as so many people are who do marry in haste and have a lifetime to repent in. Aunt Jessie says so, and she knows."
"Don't be solemn, Rose. It fidgets me to think about lifetimes, and respecting, and all those responsible things. I'm not used to it, and I don't know how to do it."
"But you _must_ think, and you must learn how before you take the responsibility upon yourself. That is what your life is for; and you mustn't spoil it by doing a very solemn thing without seeing if you are ready for it."
"Do you think about all this?" asked Kitty, shrugging up her shoulders as if responsibility of any sort did not sit comfortably on them.
"One has to sometimes, you know. But is that all you wanted to tell me?" added Rose, anxious to turn the conversation from herself.
"Oh, dear, no! The most serious thing of all is this. Steve is putting himself in order generally, and so I want to do my part; and I must begin right away before my thoughts get distracted with clothes, and all sorts of dear, delightful, frivolous things that I can't help liking. Now I wish you'd tell me where to begin. Shouldn't I improve my mind by reading something solid?" and Kitty looked over at the well-filled book-case, as if to see if it contained any thing large and dry enough to be considered "solid."
"It would be an excellent plan, and we'll look up something. What do you feel as if you needed most?"
"A little of every thing I should say; for when I look into my mind there really doesn't seem to be much there but odds and ends, and yet I'm sure I've read a great deal more than some girls do. I suppose novels don't count, though, and are of no use; for, goodness knows, the people and things they describe aren't a bit like the real ones."
"Some novels are very useful and do as much good as sermons, I've heard uncle say; because they not only describe truly, but teach so pleasantly that people like to learn in that way," said Rose, who knew the sort of books Kitty had read, and did not wonder that she felt rather astray when she tried to guide herself by their teaching.
"You pick me out some of the right kind, and I'll apply my mind to them. Then I ought to have some 'serious views' and 'methods' and 'principles;' Steve said 'principles,' good firm ones, you know," and Kitty gave a little pull at the bit of cambric she was cutting, as housewives pull cotton or calico when they want "a good firm article."
Rose could not help laughing now, though much pleased; for Kitty was so prettily in earnest, and yet so perfectly ignorant how to begin on the self-improvement she very much needed, that it was pathetic as well as comical to see and hear her.
"You certainly want some of those, and must begin at once to get them: but Aunt Jessie can help you there better than I can; or Aunt Jane, for she has very 'firm' ones, I a.s.sure you," said Rose, sobering down as quickly as possible.
"Mercy on us! I should never dare to say a word about it to Mrs. Mac: for I'm dreadfully afraid of her, she is so stern; and how I'm ever to get on when she is my mother-in-law I don't know!" cried Kitty, clasping her hands in dismay at the idea.
"She isn't half as stern as she looks; and if you go to her without fear, you've no idea how sensible and helpful she is. I used to be frightened out of my wits with her, but now I'm not a bit, and we get on nicely: indeed I'm fond of her, she is so reliable and upright in all things."
"She certainly is the straightest woman I ever saw, and the most precise. I never shall forget how scared I was when Steve took me up to see her that first time. I put on all my plainest things, did my hair in a meek k.n.o.b, and tried to act like a sober, sedate young woman. Steve would laugh at me, and say I looked like a pretty nun, so I couldn't be as proper as I wished. Mrs. Mac was very kind, of course; but her eye was so sharp I felt as if she saw right through me, and knew that I'd pinned on my bonnet-strings, lost a b.u.t.ton off my boot, and didn't brush my hair for ten minutes every night," said Kitty, in an awe-stricken tone.
"She likes you, though, and so does uncle, and he's set his heart on having you live with them by and by; so don't mind her eyes, but look straight up at her, and you'll see how kind they can grow."