The New-York Weekly Magazine, or Miscellaneous Repository Part 148

_Gentlemen_,

I have observed in your Magazine, a number of very striking and just Etymologies---I am induced therefore, to present you with the following; hoping, from its authenticity, it will be thought worthy of a place.

The term that was formerly used to express the union of two fond souls was, "Marriage and given in Marriage;" but in course of time, the encitements to this union were changed: instead of Love, Money was the stimulus; of course, a new term must be invented to express it:---So that instead of saying, on such a day a Marriage took place between such a Lady and such a Gentleman---It was said, there's a Matter-of-Money: and hence, by a slight alteration, the modern phrase of MATRIMONY.

L.

ANECDOTES.

A country Blacksmith coming into a farmer's yard with a hammer in his hand, was suddenly surprised by a severe bite from a snarling dog, which so irritated him, that he immediately retaliated upon his enemy with his heavy weapon, with the sharp end of which, he killed him on the spot.

"You might," said the person that owned the animal, "have struck him with the other end of the hammer." "That I would," answered the other, "If he had only bit me with the other end of his teeth."

An ingenious politician, meeting with a gentleman of his acquaintance, immediately began to harrangue upon his favourite theme, and positively affirmed, that, "after the late events in France, the actual government of that country will not be acknowledged by any power in Europe, _except America_."

The author of an old book called the Theatre of the World, supposes, that if a person who died of love were to be opened and anatomized, we should find all his entrails gone, his heart burnt up, his liver smoaked and dried, and all the dependencies of the brain spoiled: and he believes, that the poor soul (as he calls the lover) was scorched, and, as it were roasted upon a fire, with the vehement, ardent, and excessive heat that it endured, since first the fury of love surprised him.

ALI AND ORASMIN; Or, the Effects of Envy.

(Concluded from our last.)

Flattered by the hopes of possessing Almeria, but more through fear at the threats of Orasmin, Ibrahim sat down, without a thought of the consequences which might ensue to imitate the treasonous scroll. The monster who compelled him to the action, was delighted with his performance: and calling for sherbet, he drank, telling Ibrahim to pledge him; then, bidding him good night with a sarcastical smile, and securing the door when he went, left him in a most painful reverie.

Repairing to the walls of the seraglio, he entered by a private pa.s.sage, through which the Emperor always pa.s.sed when wont to survey the royal city in disguise; and which, by having been vizier, he was well acquainted with: and having, while in office, procured false keys to the various doors, he easily found admission to the secret audience-chamber, where none but the vizier can enter, on pain of death, without permission of the Sultan; and there leaving the letter, he returned to his house, exulting in the hope that Mustapha would discover it, when he retired there alone, as was his custom every night, to inspect such dispatches as the vizier in the day prepared for his approbation: trusting the success of his plan on the extreme credulity and impetuosity of that monarch, which hurried him into actions that provided him the most severe repentance for his moments of reflection.

The event justified his most sanguine expectations; and, before the first watch of the night was pa.s.sed, a hasty messenger summoned him to a secret audience in the palace. The sultan presented him with the letter; he read it, and appeared petrified with astonishment; compared the writing with some of Ali's he had purposely brought with him, to satisfy himself of it's ident.i.ty; then, bemoaning the defalcation of his friend, in accents of the most artfully counterfeited grief, and after an apparent struggle between duty and friends.h.i.+p--"Glory," said he, "to G.o.d and his prophet! Long life to the Commander of the Faithful! and destruction to his enemies! The profound duty every Mussulman owes to the vicegerent of Alla, obliges me to dispense with the scruples of an ill-placed friends.h.i.+p; and declare, that the conduct of Ali has long appeared to me as involved in the veil of mystery; the plausible manner in which he has ever demeaned himself, I have discovered, beyond a doubt, has been only a bait for popularity; too ardent a love for which is a certain criterion of unwarrantable ambition.

"I once had the mortification to witness the shameful defeat of the Ottoman arms, under his command: I had then many reasons to suspect treachery; but the implicit confidence I, with the empire at large, put in him, made me discredit my own senses; and it was the same infatuation which induced me to be the foremost in declaring him the most eligible for the viziers.h.i.+p, when returned from meeting the rebel Ismoul.

"Yet, when I reflect, in sober reason, on the nature of that action, and behold the insurgents, though greatly superior in force, throwing down their arms almost without the shadow of resistence, and their leader suffered to escape, it impresses me as a strong confirmation of the authenticity of his treason." "Thou art right, Orasmin!" interrupted the enraged Mustapha: "convey him instantly to a dungeon; and to-morrow's sun shall behold inflicted on him the reward of his treachery!"--"Will it please the gracious emblem of Alla," replied Orasmin, "to listen a moment longer, without anger, to his slave; while he offers, as Alla himself can witness, the counsel only dictated by that unshaken attachment ever evinced by his house to the renowned family of the Othmans!"--"Speak on, and fear not," returned Mustapha. Orasmin proceeded--"Thou knowest well, O glory of thy race! that Ali is the idol of the deluded mult.i.tude; and, should they behold him going forth to execution, what desperate steps may not their blind attachment induce them to take for his preservation? And a commotion once begun, as we know not how far the treason has spread, may encourage hundreds of accomplices in the guilt to come forward; and, led by Nadar who doubtless is at hand, induce the populace to join the compact of treason, release Ali, and shake perhaps even the foundation of the Ottoman throne? Let policy, then, bid Justice strike this night; so, the root of the confederacy being cut away, the branches shall necessarily wither; and when to-morrow's sun shall expose the traitor's head, branded with his crime, to the trembling people, thy subjects shall be more firmly fixed in their obedience--taught by the awful lesson, that the most exalted enemies of Mustapha are the fated victims of destruction!" He ceased.

"By Mahomet, I swear," rejoins the Sultan, "thy reasons are just! See him instantly dispatched! Be this," presenting his ring, "thy warrant.

Begone!"

Orasmin wanted not urging: he seized Ali; but appeared not before him, till he beheld him extended on the floor of a loathsome dungeon, secured by the pondrous manacles of injustice. On entering, having ordered the guard to withdraw--"Mahomet!" said he, "is it my n.o.ble friend Ali I am commissioned to guard? Can any wretch have accused thee of a crime meriting such dishonour! thou, whose name scandal had not even dared to prophane? Alas! my friend! where will Oppression finish his career!"---"I know not, my dear Orasmin!" replied the injured Ali, half raising himself, "my crime, nor mine accuser: innocence, however, is my support; and, while thou art my gaoler, I shall find pleasure even in a prison!"---"Generous, n.o.ble Ali," rejoind the brute, "what is it I do not feel for thee! Yet it were unkind to keep thee in suspence. Know, then, that the abandoned wretch, who was the occasion of the foul disgrace thou endurest, is no other than thy dear, thy beloved friend, Orasmin!"---"Orasmin! Orasmin!" with an accent of doubting horror, inquired the victim. "Yes!" returned the fiend, "thy Orasmin!" Ali sunk down senseless. On his recovering, Orasmin continued, "From the hour that early youth submitted me to the scourgings of a pedagogue, thou hast been my rival, and the name of Orasmin has shrunk before that of All. Thinkest thou, that I could have a spirit, and bear it? No! the childish weaknesses of friends.h.i.+p I soon got rid of; and, from the moment thou deprived me of all hope of possessing the sorceress Amine, I determined on a revenge--not a common revenge, that was always at hand--I waited, with all the patience of deliberate malignance, for a revenge worthy my hatred, and I have obtained it! I have accused thee of treason; and, behold, this ring is my warrant for thy private murder!

Murder! I say; for--O it delights my soul to p.r.o.nounce it--thou art innocent!"

"And must I die innocent?" exclaimed the devoted Ali. "Yet thy will, O Alla! be done. What more have I to wish for on earth? I have lost my friend, my wife, and my child!"--"Friend," interrupted Orasmin, "thou never hadst! Thy wife and child----But, hold! I came to torment, not to satisfy thee!"--"Oh! Orasmin, what a conflict hast thou raised in my bosom! My wife and child! knowest thou any thing of them?" Orasmin smiled contemptuously. "Speak, only say if thou knowest aught of them!"---"I will say nothing," replied he; "uncertainty will increase thy pangs. Prepare for death!---Slaves!" The door of the dungeon burst open, and presented to their view Mustapha, Ibrahim, and Amine! "Secure that fiend!" cried the Sultan; and instantly Orasmin was loaded with chains. Ali and Amine were lying senseless in each other's arms; Orasmin a.s.sumed a desperate sullenness; the Sultan and Ibrahim surveyed the whole in silence. "Alla! Alla! Alla!" repeated the reviving Ali; "thou art merciful! thou art merciful!"

"My dear lord," interrupted Amine, "dreary have been the hours since we parted! O hear my justification! While walking by the seaside, a band of men, masked, beset me; and, forcing me on a horse, carried me, blind-folded, I knew not where; for when suffered to remove the bandage, I was alone, in a mean, gloomy apartment, the door of which was secured.

There have I remained, in vain lamenting my fate; ignorant of my oppressor; and seeing no one, except a slave, who put my food through a lattice daily, but never spoke; till this night I heard the voice of Orasmin in a tone of threatening.

"I listened; and discovered, that he was compelling that generous youth, Ibrahim, to write a treasonous letter in characters like yours. When I found Orasmin was gone, I entreated the youth to liberate me: instantly he opened a door into my apartment, so artfully contrived, that I had never before observed it. I told him who I was, and begged him again to deliver me. He was shocked; confirmed what I had over-heard, and promised to protect me.

"He discovered, with indignation, that he himself was also a prisoner.

After a long deliberation, and many fruitless attempts to force the door, at the peril of our lives, we escaped by a window into the garden.

Here we had fresh difficulties to encounter, and the fourth watch pa.s.sed before we were quite at liberty.

"We soon learned that you was imprisoned. Flying to the palace, our gracious Sultan admitted us to an audience, when we convinced him of the villainy of thy false friend." "And, behold me," interrupted the Sultan, "ready to do thee justice, Ali; and inflict on that wretch the punishment which he had prepared for thee! for, by Alla's self I swear, this night is his last!" "My fate is just!" said Orasmin, in a tone of penitence. "But, before I die, let me make what reparation is in my power to the man I have injured.

"Behold, Ali, in Ibrahim, I restore thee thy long-lost son!" Extreme was the astonishment of all; and the rapture of Ali and Amine induced them to kneel for a pardon for the culprit. "Ask not pardon," said Orasmin, "which must soon be repented! I stole thy child solely for the purposes of revenge; though fortune never, till now, gave me an opportunity of making use of him equal to my wishes; and, to make him the source of his father's death, was a stroke worthy the n.o.blest policy of vengeance.

Thou hast escaped me; but, to give him thus kindly, were an inequality of soul, poor indeed! No I have pangs for thee yet in store, the thought of which makes the contemplation of death and tortures pleasant to me.

"I only revealed him to thee, to make thee feel the curses of lasting separation. The mother once disdained the offer I made of my hand; it was my intention, therefore, to have kept her ignorant of her persecutor, languis.h.i.+ng till grief and despair removed her from my reach; but the boy had answered the end I designed him for: I wanted him no more; and, at liberty, he might have betrayed me. For security, I gave him poison in sherbet; and thought, even had he got free, so strong it was, that it would have worked faster than his conscience!"

"The vengeance be on thine own head!" cried Ibrahim; "for it was thyself who drank the poison. I saw thee drop something in the draught intended for me; and unseen by thee, changed the cups."

"I feel it! I feel it!" exclaimed the frantic Orasmin. "Curse on thee, Mahomet! thou hast frustrated all!" "Hence with him!" said Mustapha. And then led Amine and Ibrahim out of the prison. By permission of the Sultan, Ibrahim was united to Almeria; and the partic.i.p.ation of her husband's honours, who was restored to his viziers.h.i.+p, amply recompenced Amine for all her sorrows.

An exemplary instance of grat.i.tude towards Alla and the Sultan---towards the latter, by faithful counsel, and steady attachment to his interest; and, towards the former, by an uniform course of piety, and a conscientious dispensation of justice and benevolence to his fellow subjects. Ali lived long beloved, and happy. As it is written in the sacred tablets of truth---"The righteous shall dwell in the tents of gladness, and the merciful in the gardens of peace: while the wicked shall be covered with shame; and the envious man shall be consumed in the fire which he kindleth for his neighbour."

_For the +New-York Weekly Magazine+._

ON INDUSTRY.

The absurd indulgence with which parents antic.i.p.ate every wish of their children often paves the way for their destruction, and entirely unfits them for returning that affectionate care which is due to the authors of their being. How many instances do we see of the ill effects of such misplaced kindness. By supplying children with all the superfluities of life, we at once weaken the springs of exertion, and induce a habit of indolence fatal to future improvement; for why should they exert themselves to procure that which is ready at their call? Virtuous habits and habits of industry are nearly the same; and since these only are productive of happiness, it is of the utmost importance to teach the youthful mind that enjoyment and self-satisfaction must be purchased by labour.---Happy is the man, who, in early life, has been taught by experience the blessed effects of honest industry, and the inestimable value of time. Multiply _time_ by _industry_, and what is the result?--Peace of mind; the innocent enjoyment of life, and every thing that can exalt human nature.

By Industry, I must not be understood to mean the incessant drudging pursuit after sorded gain:---I have likewise reference to mental industry; the improvement of that intellectual part of our existence which elevates our view above this narrow scene of things, and teaches us to soar to heaven.

VIATOR.

MILITARY ANECDOTE

A new formed corps of Volunteers were one day exercising in a park, where a Bull was kept, and where he had been accustomed to enjoy unresisted sovereignty. Whether displeased with the aukwardness of their manuvres, offended at their intrusion on the scene of his pleasure, or regarding their martial music as a challenge of defiance on his own territory, the Lordly Animal advanced with a menacing air; and notwithstanding some attempts at resistance, charged the line, broke through the ranks, and after having completely routed and dispersed the enemy, remained undisputed master of the field!

LEVITIES.

Literary men, and the advantages of learning, being the subject of conversation when JOHNSON was present, he enforced and closed the observations in the following celebrated sentence of Lactantius--- "Eruditio inter prospera ornamentum, inter adversa refugium."

Professor Richardson's observation, that men judge of objects according to their peculiar habits, and that a beautiful lawn, which excites pastoral ideas in the poet's mind, suggests the value of the land to the miser, is exemplified by the following: