Literary Blunders Part 11

''The answers to the question 'Who was Rossini? What influence did he exercise over the art of music in his time?' brought to light much curious and interesting intelligence. His nationality was various.

He was 'a German by birth, but was born at Pesaro in Italy'; 'he was born in 1670 and died 1826'; he was a 'Frenchman,'

'a noted writer of the French,'

the place of nativity was 'Pizzarro in Genoa'; he was 'an Italian, and made people feel drunk with the sparke and richness of his melody'; he composed _Oberon, Don Giovanni; Der Frischutz_, and _Stabet Matar_. He was 'an accom

plished writer of violin music and produced some of the prettiest melodies'; it is 'to him we owe the extension of chords struck together in ar peggio'; he was 'the founder of some inst.i.tution or another'; 'the great aim of his life was to make the music he wrote an interpretation of the words it was set to'; he 'broke many of the laws of music'; he 'considerable altered the stage'; he 'was noted for using many instruments not invented before'; in his 'composition he used the chromatic scale very much, and goes very deep in harmony'; he 'was the first taking up the style, and therefore to make a great change in music'; he was 'the cause of much censure and bickering through his writings'; he 'promoted a less strict mode of writing and other beneficial things'; and, finally, 'Giachono Rossini was born at Pezarro in 1792. In the year 1774 there was war raging in Paris between the Gluckists and Piccinists. Gluck wanted to do away with the old restraint of the Italian aria, and improve opera from a dramatic point of view. Piccini remained true to the old

Italian style, and Rossini helped him to carry it on still further by his operas, _Tancredi, William Tell_, and _Dorma del Lago_.' ''

The child who gave the following brilliant answer to the question, ''What was the character of Queen Mary?'' must have suffered herself from the troubles supposed to be connected with the possession of a stepmother: ''She was wilful as a girl and cruel as a woman, but'' (adds the pupil) ''what can you expect from any one who had had five stepmothers?''

The greatest confusion among the examined is usually to be found in the answers to historical and geographical questions. All that one boy knew about Nelson was that he ''was buried in St. Paul's Cathedral amid the groans of a dying nation.'' The student who mixed up Oliver Cromwell with Thomas Cromwell's master Wolsey produced this strange answer: ''Oliver Cromwell is said to have exclaimed, as he lay a-dying, If I had served my G.o.d as I served my king, He would not have left me to mine enemies.''

Miss Graham relates in the _University

Correspondent_ an answer which contains the same confusion with a further one added: ''Wolsey was a famous general who fought in the Crimean War, and who, after being decapitated several times, said to Cromwell, Ah! if I had only served you as you have served me, I would not have been deserted in my old age.''

''The Spanish Armada,'' wrote a young man of seventeen, ''took place in the reign of Queen Anne; she married Philip of Spain, who was a very cruel man.

The Spanish and the English fought very bravely against each other. The English wanted to conquer Spain. Several battles were fought, in which hundreds of the English and Spanish were defeated. They lost some very large s.h.i.+ps, and were at a great loss on both sides.''

The following description of the Nile by a schoolboy is very fine: ''The Nile is the only remarkable river in the world.

It was discovered by Dr. Livingstone, and it rises in Mungo Park.'' Constantinople is described thus: ''It is on the Golden Horn; a strong fortress; has a University, and is the residence of Peter the Great.

Its chief building is the Sublime Port.''

Amongst the additions to our geographical knowledge may be mentioned that Gibraltar is ''an island built on a rock,'' and that Portugal can only be reached through the St. Bernard's Pa.s.s ''by means of sledges drawn by reindeer and dogs.''

''Turin is the capital of China,'' and ''Cuba is a town in Africa very difficult of access.''

One of the finest answers ever given in an examination was that of the boy who was asked to repeat all he knew of Sir Walter Raleigh. This was it: ''He introduced tobacco into England, and while he was smoking he exclaimed, 'Master Ridley, we have this day lighted such a fire in England as shall never be put out.' '' Can that, with any sort of justice, be styled a blunder?

The rule that ''the King can do no wrong'' was carried to an extreme length when a schoolboy blunder of Louis XIV.

was allowed to change the gender of a French noun. The King said ''un carosse,'' and that is what it is now.

In Cotgrave's _Dictionary carosse_ appears

as feminine, but Mnage notes it as having been changed from feminine to masculine.

It has already been pointed out that some of the blunders of the examined are due to the absurdity of the questions of the examiner. The following excellent anecdote from the late Archdeacon Sinclair's _Sketches of Old Times and Distant Places_ (1875) shows that even when the question is sound a difficulty may arise by the manner of presenting it:--

''I was one day conversing with Dr.

Williams about schools and school examinations. He said: 'Let me give you a curious example of an examination at which I was present in Aberdeen. An English clergyman and a Lowland Scotsman visited one of the best parish schools in that city. They were strangers, but the master received them civilly, and inquired: ''Would you prefer that I should _speer_ these boys, or that you should _speer_ them yourselves?'' The English clergyman having ascertained that to _speer_ meant to question, desired the master to proceed.

He did so with great success, and the

boys answered numerous interrogatories as to the Exodus from Egypt. The clergyman then said he would be glad in his turn to _speer_ the boys, and began: ''How did Pharaoh die?'' There was a dead silence. In this dilemma the Lowland gentleman interposed. ''I think, sir, the boys are not accustomed to your English accent,'' and inquired in broad Scotch, ''Hoo did Phawraoh dee?'' Again there was a dead silence, till the master said: ''I think, gentlemen, you can't _speer_ these boys; I'll show you how.'' And he proceeded: ''Fat cam to Phawraoh at his hinder end?'' _i.e_., in his latter days. The boys with one voice answered, ''He was drooned''; and a smart little fellow added, ''Ony la.s.sie could hae told you that.''

The master then explained that in the Aberdeen dialect ''to dee'' means to die a natural death, or to die in bed: hence the perplexity of the boys, who knew that Pharaoh's end was very different.' ''

The author is able to add to this chapter a thoroughly original series of answers to certain questions relating to acoustics, light and heat, which Professor Oliver

Lodge, F.R.S., has been so kind as to communicate for this work, and which cannot fail to be appreciated by his readers.

It must be understood that all these answers are genuine, although they are not given _verbatim et literatim_, and in some instances one answer is made to contain several blunders. Professor Lodge expresses the opinion that the questions might in some instances have been worded better, so as to exclude several of the misapprehensions, and therefore that the answers may be of some service to future setters of questions. He adds that of late the South Kensington papers have become more drearily correct and monotonous, because the style of instruction now available affords less play to exuberant fancy untrammelled by any information regarding the subject in hand.

1880.--ACOUSTICS, LIGHT AND HEAT PAPER.

_Science and Art Department_.

The following are specimens of answers given by candidates at recent examinations in Acoustics, Light and Heat, held in

connection with the Science and Art Department, South Kensington. The answers have not of course all been selected from the same paper, neither have they all been chosen for the same reason.

_Question_ I.--State the relations existing between the pressure, temperature, and density of a given gas. How is it proved that when a gas expands its temperature is diminished?

_Answer_.--Now the answer to the first part of this question is, that the square root of the pressure increases, the square root of the density decreases, and the absolute temperature remains about the same; but as to the last part of the question about a gas expanding when its temperature is diminished, I expect I am intended to say I don't believe a word of it, for a bladder in front of a fire expands, but its temperature is not at all diminished.

_Question_ 2.--If you walk on a dry path between two walls a few feet apart, you hear a musical note or ''ring'' at each footstep. Whence comes this?

_Answer_.--This is similar to phosph.o.r.escent paint. Once any sound gets between two parallel reflectors or walls, it bounds from one to the other and never stops for a long time. Hence it is persistent, and when you walk between the walls you hear the sounds made by those who walked there before you. By following a m.u.f.fin man down the pa.s.sage within a short time you can hear most distinctly a musical note, or, as it is more properly termed in the question, a ''ring''

at every (other) step.

_Question_ 3.--What is the reason that the hammers which strike the strings of a pianoforte are made not to strike the middle of the strings? Why are the ba.s.s strings loaded with coils of wire?

_Answer_.--Because the tint of the clang would be bad. Because to jockey them heavily.

_Question_ 4.--Explain how to determine the time of vibration of a given tuning- fork, and state what apparatus you would require for the purpose.

_Answer_.--For this determination I should require an accurate watch beating

seconds, and a sensitive ear. I mount the fork on a suitable stand, and then, as the second hand of my watch pa.s.ses the figure 60 on the dial, I draw the bow neatly across one of its p.r.o.ngs. I wait.

I listen intently. The throbbing air particles are receiving the pulsations; the beating p.r.o.ngs are giving up their original force; and slowly yet surely the sound dies away. Still I can hear it, but faintly and with close attention; and now only by pressing the bones of my head against its p.r.o.ngs. Finally the last trace disappears. I look at the time and leave the room, having determined the time of vibration of the common ''pitch'' fork.

This process deteriorates the fork considerably, hence a different operation must be performed on a fork which is only _lent_.

_Question_ 6.--What is the difference between a ''real'' and a ''virtual'' image?

Give a drawing showing the formation of one of each kind.

_Answer_.--You see a real image every morning when you shave. You do not see virtual images at all. The only people who see virtual images are those people

who are not quite right, like Mrs. A.

Virtual images are things which don't exist. I can't give you a reliable drawing of a virtual image, because I never saw one.

_Question_ 8.--How would you disprove, experimentally, the a.s.sertion that white light pa.s.sing through a piece of coloured gla.s.s acquires colour from the gla.s.s? What is it that really happens?

_Answer_.--To disprove the a.s.sertion (so repeatedly made) that ''white light pa.s.sing through a piece of coloured gla.s.s acquires colour from the gla.s.s,'' I would ask the gentleman to observe that the gla.s.s has just as much colour after the light has gone through it as it had before. That is what would really happen.

_Question_ 11.--Explain why, in order to cook food by boiling, at the top of a high mountain, you must employ a different method from that used at the sea level.

_Answer_.--It is easy to cook food at the sea level by boiling it, but once you get above the sea level the only plan is to fry it in its own fat. It is, in fact, impossible to boil water above the sea level by any

amount of heat. A different method, therefore, would have to be employed to boil food at the top of a high mountain, but what that method is has not yet been discovered. The future may reveal it to a daring experimentalist.

_Question_ 12.--State what are the conditions favourable for the formation of dew.

Describe an instrument for determining the dew point, and the method of using it.

_Answer_.--This is easily proved from question 1. A body of gas as it ascends expands, cools, and deposits moisture; so if you walk up a hill the body of gas inside you expands, gives its heat to you, and deposits its moisture in the form of dew or common sweat. Hence these are the favourable conditions; and moreover it explains why you get warm by ascending a hill, in opposition to the well-known law of the Conservation of Energy.

_Question_ 13.--On freezing water in a gla.s.s tube, the tube sometimes breaks.

Why is this? An iceberg floats with 1,000,000 tons of ice above the water line. About how many tons are below the water line?

_Answer_.--The water breaks the tube because of capallarity. The iceberg floats on the top because it is lighter, hence no tons are below the water line.

Another reason is that an iceberg cannot exceed 1,000,000 tons in weight: hence if this much is above water, none is below. Ice is exceptional to all other bodies except bis.m.u.th. All other bodies have 1090 feet below the surface and 2 feet extra for every degree centigrade.

If it were not for this, all fish would die, and the earth be held in an iron grip.

P.S.--When I say 1090 feet, I mean 1090 feet per second.

_Question_ 14.--If you were to pour a pound of molten lead and a pound of molten iron, each at the temperature of its melting point, upon two blocks of ice, which would melt the most ice, and why?

_Answer_.--This question relates to diathermancy. Iron is said to be a diathermanous body (from _dia_, through, and _thermo_, I heat), meaning that it gets heated through and through, and accordingly contains a large quant.i.ty of real heat.

Lead is said to be an athermanous body

(from _a_, privative, and _thermo_, I heat), meaning that it gets heated secretly or in a latent manner. Hence the answer to this question depends on which will get the best of it, the real heat of the iron or the latent heat of the lead. Probably the iron will smite furthest into the ice, as molten iron is white and glowing, while melted lead is dull.

_Question_ 21.--A hollow indiarubber ball full of air is suspended on one arm of a balance and weighed in air. The whole is then covered by the receiver of an air pump. Explain what will happen as the air in the receiver is exhausted.

_Answer_.--The ball would expand and entirely fill the vessell, driving out all before it. The balance being of greater density than the rest would be the last to go, but in the end its inertia would be overcome and all would be expelled, and there would be a perfect vacuum. The ball would then burst, but you would not be aware of the fact on account of the loudness of a sound varying with the density of the place in which it is generated, and not on that in which it is heard.