Three Dramas Part 56

The Mayor. Then what is politics, if America isn't?

Koll. To talk politics is--for instance--to use the arguments your wors.h.i.+p did. Mr. Gran will proceed.

Gran. I see that the Priest wishes to speak. I shall be happy to give way.

Koll. The Priest will address the meeting.

The Priest. I see here, in this a.s.sembly, a number of those whom I am accustomed to address in more solemn surroundings. My dear paris.h.i.+oners, it was for your sake that I came here. You have heard for yourselves--the whole question is a political one; and, dear fellow Christians, let me entreat you to shun politics! Did not our Lord Himself say: "My kingdom is not of this world"? This freedom, this equality, of which they talk is not the soul's freedom, not that equality which--

Koll. I would suggest to the reverend speaker that he should postpone his remarks until the next time he gets into the pulpit. (Slight laughter.)

The Priest. One should be instant in season and out of season; therefore--

Koll. I forbid you to continue.

The Priest. It is written: "Thou shalt obey G.o.d rather than man"! My dear paris.h.i.+oners, let us all leave this meeting! Who will follow his priest? (Takes a few steps towards the door, but no one follows him.

Laughter. He sighs deeply, and sits down again.)

Koll. If no one else wishes to speak--

Vinager. Mr. Chairman!

Koll. Mr. Vinager wishes to speak.

Vinager. These proceedings remind me of China, and of the Chinese mandarins who will not allow any one of lesser degree to come near them--although at moments I have felt as if I were still in Europe in the presence of a still greater power, greater even than the Grand Turk--I mean this democratic envy which grudges others what it has not got itself. To reconcile both parties I should like to make the following suggestion. Build the carriages, as is often done, in two stories. Then those who wish to ensure their privacy can do so by sitting upstairs; and the others will be satisfied too, because they will all be in the same carriage after all. (Loud laughter.)

Koll. If no one else wishes to speak (looks at GRAN, who shakes his head) I shall proceed to put the question to the vote. The motion submitted by the directors, which is now before the meeting, is as follows--

The Mayor. Excuse me, but what of my motion wit h regard to a saloon for his Majesty?

Koll. I did not understand your wors.h.i.+p to mean your suggestion as a formal motion.

The Mayor. I did, though.

Koll. Then I will put it to the vote after the director, motion has been voted upon.

The Mayor. A motion that concerns the King should take precedence of all others.

Koll. Even the King is subject to the rules of logic. The directors'

motion is: "That only one cla.s.s of railway carriage shall be purchased, of a type slightly more comfortable than the ordinary third-cla.s.s carriage." Will those in favour of the motion kindly go to the left--on this side of the room; those against the motion, to the right. (Nearly all go to the left. Cheers are heard outside, and are gradually taken up by those inside. KOLL hammers with his mallet.) Order, please! (The cheering ceases, but an animated conversation goes on.) The directors'

motion is carried!

The Mayor (shouting). I am sure every one did not understand the method of voting!

Koll (hammering with his mallet). Order, order. (Quiet is gradually restored.) What did your wors.h.i.+p say?

The Mayor. That some people must have misunderstood the way of voting; because I see my daughter Natalie, who is a shareholder too, on the other side of the room. Of course she has made a mistake.

Natalie. Oh no, father, I haven't. (Loud laughter, and applause.)

The Priest. Ah, my poor deluded paris.h.i.+oners, I shall pray for you!

The Mayor. Order!--The Mayor's motion--

Alstad. I would suggest that the Mayor should withdraw it. We know what its fate would be in such a meeting as this.

Koll. As long as I occupy the chair, I shall not permit any derogatory expressions to be applied to the meeting. Does the Mayor still insist on his motion being put? (Whispers to him: "Say no!")

The Mayor. No.

Koll. Then, as no one else wishes to speak, I declare the meeting at an end. (Every one begins to move about and discuss affairs vigorously.)

Alstad (to his son VILHELM). So you have the face to vote with these--these Americans, against your old father, have you?

Vilhelm. Well, father, I honestly think--

Alstad. Just you wait till I get you home!

Vilhelm. Oh, that's it, is it? Then I shan't go home--so there! I shall stay here and get drunk, I shall.

Alstad. Oh, come, come!

Vilhelm. Yes, I shall! I shall stay here and get drunk!

Alstad. But, Vilhelm, listen to me! (Takes him by the arm. Meantime a STRANGER has taken KOLL and GRAN by the arm, to their manifest surprise, and brought the forward away from the crowd. He stands for a moment, looking them in the face, till suddenly KOLL gives a start and cries out: "The King!")

The King. Hus.h.!.+

Gran. It really is--!

The King (to GRAN). You are at home here; take up into a room--and give us some champagne. My throat is as dry as a lime-kiln!

Curtain

SCENE II

(SCENE.--A room built in Gothic style, comfortably furnished and decorated with trophies of the chase. GRAN ushers in the KING and KOLL.)

Gran. We can be quite alone here. (ANNA, a deaf and dumb girl of about fifteen, brings in some bottles of champagne, and, during the following dialogue, sets out gla.s.ses, refreshments, cigars, and pipes. She is quick and attentive to render the slightest service required of her; when not employed, she sits on a stool in the background. She talks to GRAN on her fingers, and receives orders from him in the same manner.)

The King. Ah, this is like old times! I know the setting: "Gothic room in mediaeval style, decorated with trophies of the chase. Furnished with an eye to bachelor comfort!" You always had bachelor habits, you know, even when you were quite a boy. (To KOLL.) We never called him anything but "the Bachelor" on board s.h.i.+p. He never had a love affair in all the three years our cruise lasted; but the rest of us had them in every port we touched at!

Koll. He is just the same in that respect now.

Gran (offering the KING some champagne). Allow me!

The King. Thanks; I shall be glad of it. (To KOLL.) Your health, my former tutor! (To GRAN.) And yours! (They drink.) Ah, that has done me good!--Well now, let me ask you this: isn't it true that, all through the meeting, you were talking nothing but republicanism, although you didn't actually mention the word?