Memoir and Diary of John Yeardley, Minister of the Gospel - BestLightNovel.com
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He soon after alludes to the Memoir of Joseph John Gurney, then just published, and to the sharp stimulus which he received from its perusal--a stimulus which minds fixed upon improvement always receive from the vivid representation of time and talents diligently employed.
6 _mo_. 16.--Many of my solitary moments are cheered, and I am greatly edified, in reading J.J. Gurney's Memoirs. It is a real privilege to be introduced into the daily walk of the life of a Christian man with such an enlightened and enlarged mind, whose expansive heart is filled with love for the whole human race. Strengthened by faith, and filled with the unction of the Spirit, his life was devoted to doing good to the family of man, laboring for the conversion of sinners, and comforting believers.
The diligence of J.J. Gurney in study, &c., has stimulated me to renew the reading of the Greek New Testament, but I sink into the dust when I see what he accomplished in comparison of my own insignificance. It is, however, a comfort to know that I have a merciful Lord, who will not require of me the exercise of gifts that I have not received. O that I may he more faithful in the employment of the capacity which has been entrusted to me, for the good of souls and the honor of my Lord!
The reflections which follow add another to the numberless testimonies of the saints' experience, that the Christian life is a continual warfare.
I am sensible of having lost ground for some time past for want of more diligence in watchfulness and prayer. I have been deeply sorry for it, and I do hope my compa.s.sionate Lord has forgiven me. As a proof of his forgiveness, I am permitted to enjoy once more the smiles of his countenance, which cheer my lonely walk. How greatly do I long for more intimate communion with the Beloved of my soul, the precious Saviour! Lord _preserve_ me in _every moment_ of _temptation_, and make me more entirely thine! Grant me more confidence in the immediate action of thy Spirit in the ministry of the word, that my communications of this nature may be deep and clear, and under the unction of thy Holy Spirit.
_Amen_!
6 _mo_. 23.--This morning I have been favored, more than usual, in my endeavor to pour out my soul before G.o.d in prayer, in desiring more purity of heart, more faith; and that it might please my compa.s.sionate Lord to sustain and console me in my solitary lot, and preserve me faithful to the end of the race. Many relatives and near friends were brought to my remembrance, whom I endeavored to present to the mercy of a merciful G.o.d.
In the same diary is an appropriate notice of Dr. Steinkopf, and a tender tribute to the memory of Martha Yeardley.
The other evening was spent at J. and M.C.S.'s with Dr. Steinkopf. "The h.o.a.ry head" of this aged and experienced Christian is as "a crown of glory," for "it is found in the way of righteousness." He is full of love, speaking constantly out of a grateful heart of the mercies of his G.o.d.
Before parting he read a few verses, exhorted us and supplicated for us.
A little more than three years have fled away since my precious and dearly-beloved M.Y. entered on a blissful eternity. How do I feel the loss of her sweet, cheerful, and edifying society! Ever since her blessed spirit fled from earth to heaven, she has never by night or day been long absent from my thoughts. How often does my soul pant and pray for a preparation of heart for that blissful state where she now is, near to her precious Saviour, who redeemed her with his own blood. He enabled her to serve him when on earth, and now she sings his praises in heaven. What a charm did she impart to my daily life! Our pursuits were always one and the same; and now what a desert I still have before me,--but it may be very short.
In the Eighth Month, John Yeardley went to Minden on a visit to Ernst Peitsmeyer, whose daughter Sophie had been for some time his kind and cheerful companion, and who now, with her parents and other friends, welcomed him again to Germany. Whilst at Minden he derived benefit from the sulphur baths of the Klause, not far from the town.
The bath, he says, is one hour's gentle exercise on the saddle. The farm where the spring is stands quite alone in the midst of a wood, and the way to it is delightful,--much suited to my taste. Sophie rides sometimes with me: it cheers me to have her trotting by my side.
The handful of inquiring persons at Obernkirchen, whom J.Y. visited on his return from Norway, continued to claim his sympathy, and one First-day he joined them at their usual place of wors.h.i.+p.
It was, he writes, a refres.h.i.+ng time in this little meeting. When the little company first met together they were dragged into the street by the police; but they persevered, and, on making an appeal to the magistrate at Rinteln, stated their case with so much simplicity that the government has granted them liberty to meet together undisturbed. How marvellous, the Friends are protected; and the Baptists, under the same government, are persecuted with increasing rigor! No interference on their behalf has been of the least use.--(_Dairy and Letter_.)
In the Fourth Month of 1855 John Yeardley received a certificate "to visit his friends in Yorks.h.i.+re, and to hold meetings with persons not in church-fellows.h.i.+p" with Friends.
I arrived at Halifax, he says, in a letter of the 28th of the Fourth Month, on Fifth-day evening, and attended the Monthly Meeting of Brighouse on the 20th. It looked formidable to me in prospect on the first entering into harness; but I hope the meeting proved a good introduction, and I saw a good specimen of a large, harmonious, and well-conducted Monthly Meeting. There might be near 250 members present.
When he had completed the service, he took a week of repose at Harrowgate, where he briefly reviews his journey.
5 _mo_. 29.--In pa.s.sing along through my native county, I found many countenances missing which were very familiar to me years ago, and who are now gone to their rest. But I was comforted to find in many places a race of young people springing up who bore the marks of being plants of my Heavenly Father's right-hand planting, and who gave hopes of becoming useful in his Church. It is with a grateful heart that I record the mercy of my Lord, in that he has granted me strength in a remarkable manner to do what he put in my heart to do, from place to place. Blessed be his name!
After having finished the service in Yorks.h.i.+re, I have had a week's tarriance at Harrowgate. The rest and quiet have proved beneficial to my health, and very precious have been the seasons of sweet communion I have been permitted to hold with my G.o.d in this retirement.
This summer he repeated his visit to Minden, and hired a lodging at the Klause. A reflection in one of the letters which he wrote from this retreat affords a pleasing glimpse of his mind:--
I sometimes think that a large portion of comfort and joy are allowed to those who really love the Lord; and how chastened are the pleasures of the humble Christian! They abide with us long after the causes of them are pa.s.sed away; and the more our permitted pleasures are enjoyed under a grateful sense of the goodness of the bountiful Giver, the longer they may be permitted to us.
In the Ninth Month, he attended the Two-months' Meeting at Pyrmont. It was not without emotion that he visited once more the place which had been so familiar to him in earlier days. The hopes he had then conceived, and which, as we have seen, he had so fondly cherished, with regard to the Society of Friends in that part, had been disappointed; the little company had dwindled in numbers and declined in religious influence; and when he took leave of Pyrmont for the last time, it was with a sorrowful heart.
From Minden, accompanied by Sophie Peitsmeyer, he went southwards, and took up his abode at the little town of Neuveville, on the Lake of Bienne, in Switzerland.
I spent, he says, two or three days at Neufchatel, and visited many of my old friends in the place and neighborhood; but it was affecting to find how many of those I had known years ago were no longer on this earth.
Madame Petavel was as warm-hearted as ever; the professor, her husband, is ripening for heaven.
John Yeardley had gone to Neuveville with the intention of pa.s.sing the winter in Switzerland. After remaining a month, however, he returned to England; and this change of mind was the result of a remarkable circ.u.mstance. He became silent and reserved, with the air and manners of one who is not at peace with himself; until one night, when he was heard to cry out in a loud tone, as though speaking to some one. The next morning at breakfast he appeared subdued and full of tenderness; and on his young friend inquiring what had made him cry out in the night, he told her that he must return home, for there was more work for him to do. He said that a prospect of service in the gospel had latterly opened before him, and that as he had greatly desired to remain in Switzerland, he had striven against the sense of duty and refused to yield; but that during the night he had had a vision, in which he heard the command repeated to return home and enter again upon his labor, and that he felt, as he thought, the touch of the heavenly messenger's hand. This caused him to call out; and when he awoke, he found that willingness of spirit had taken the place of his former obstinacy. Thus turned from his own purpose, he set about to accomplish the will of his gracious Master with his usual resolution, and they made the best of their way back to England. The nature of the service which he saw before him is touched upon in the following pa.s.sage from a letter, dated Neuveville, the 14th of the Tenth Month.
My home duties press heavily upon me.... Very long have I thought about the young men, and the younger part of our Society; and I have a hope the way will be made for my finding access to them, in a religious and social point of view. Should it be permitted, the Lord grant that it may tend to mutual comfort.
John Yeardley returned through Paris. He spent a day or two in that great city, which he never saw "so quiet and free from soldiers." We extract from his Diary a short note of a conversation which took place at the _table d'hote_ of the hotel where he lodged, and which appears to us to be of an instructive character.
Two men contended respecting the motive by which mankind are influenced to good actions. One attributed it to _reason_; the other held that it was _virtue_ which restrains from evil and impels to good, and maintained that we must do good actions from the love of justice and virtue, and not from the fear of punishment or the hope of reward. The latter had the advantage over his antagonist in the argument:--
I had not, says J.Y., taken part in the conversation; but at the close I felt constrained to tell the _Christian_ that I confessed myself on his side, because he had defended the truth; only that what he called _virtue_, I called _the action of the spirit of G.o.d in the heart of man_. With much animation, he clasped my hand in his, and cried, "That is the very thing,--that is just what I mean!"
In the year 1856, he engaged in two religious visits at home, both of them in accordance with the kind of service which had been unfolded to him in the retirement of Neuveville, viz., mingled religious and social intercourse with his younger fellow-members.
In reading the expression of his feelings in the prospect of the former of these engagements, it is instructive to remark, that the same sense of entire dependence which had bowed his spirit when required in early life to make the first offering of this kind, was present with him when now called upon to go forth in his Master's name for the twentieth time, and when age and experience had given him reverence among men.
1 _mo_. 8.--To-morrow is our Monthly Meeting, when I expect to propose to my Friends a visit to the meetings composing the Quarterly Meetings of Bristol and Somerset, and Gloucester and Wilts. Every time any fresh exercise turns up for me, it always feels as if it was the _first_ time of entering into the holy harness. If my friends permit me to proceed, I hope I shall be helped through it; but it looks formidable.
21_st_.--Bristol is like a great mountain looking me in the face, and weighing heavily upon my heart.
The following short memoranda of the way in which he was engaged at Bristol are taken from his letters; the Diary, during his later years, supplies few notes, either of his labors or his experience:--
3 _mo_.--I met at Richard Fry's house a large number of young men and women teachers of the First-day School; forty-eight were present. An opportunity was offered for my receiving and also communicating information respecting schools and education. What makes the subject more interesting in Bristol, is the attendance of more than one hundred of the school children at meeting on First-day mornings, which, I think, has been the practice for about ten years, and their behavior is orderly and good.
31_st_.--I am somewhat busily employed in this busy city in visiting the young men. I find very ready access to them, and my engagement has the hearty concurrence of all my friends. I am abundantly convinced that it would have been a great mistake to have ran away from the place without making the attempt at the performance of the present service. The usual meetings for wors.h.i.+p have been seasons of divine favor, some of them, I think, extraordinarily so, which I consider a great mercy in my Heavenly Father, when I consider the weakness of the poor instrument. It has been announced for me to give a lecture this evening in the large meeting-house, on my travels in Europe, a _sound_ which almost frightens me. Friends really do not know what a poor thing I am.