Mr. Punch's Life in London - BestLightNovel.com
You’re reading novel Mr. Punch's Life in London Part 18 online at BestLightNovel.com. Please use the follow button to get notification about the latest chapter next time when you visit BestLightNovel.com. Use F11 button to read novel in full-screen(PC only). Drop by anytime you want to read free – fast – latest novel. It’s great if you could leave a comment, share your opinion about the new chapters, new novel with others on the internet. We’ll do our best to bring you the finest, latest novel everyday. Enjoy
_A._ According to circ.u.mstances, from three-fifths to nineteen-twentieths of his easily-secured takings.
_Q._ And what does promotion do for the promoter?
_A._ It usually bestows upon him temporary prosperity.
_Q._ Why do you say "temporary"?
_A._ Because a pleasant present is frequently followed by a disastrous future.
_Q._ You mean, then, that this prosperity is like the companies promoted, "limited"?
_A._ Yes, by the Court of Bankruptcy.
[Ill.u.s.tration: "ON 'CHANGE"
_Brown._ "Mornin'. Fresh mornin', ain't it?"
_Smith._ "'Course it is. Every morning's a fresh morning! By-bye!"
[_Brown's temper all day is quite unbearable._
[Ill.u.s.tration: _Sympathetic Pa.s.ser-by._ "But if he's badly hurt, why doesn't he go to the hospital?" _British Workman._ "Wot! In 'is dinner-time!!"]
ADVERTIs.e.m.e.nT PERVERSIONS (_By Dumb-Crambo, Junior_)
[Ill.u.s.tration: Was.h.i.+ng wanted]
[Ill.u.s.tration: Vacancy for one pupil]
[Ill.u.s.tration: Improver wanted in the dressmaking]
[Ill.u.s.tration: Left-off clothing]
[Ill.u.s.tration: Branch establishment]
[Ill.u.s.tration: Engagement wanted, as housekeeper. Highly recommended]
[Ill.u.s.tration: Board and residence]
[Ill.u.s.tration: Unfurnished flat]
[Ill.u.s.tration: Smart youth wanted]
[Ill.u.s.tration: Mangling done on the shortest notice]
RIVER STYX.--"The thousand masts of Thames."
THE MAN WE SHOULD LIKE TO SEND TO A SeANCE.--The man who knows how to hit the happy medium.
APPROPRIATE _LOCALE_ FOR THE DAIRY SHOW.--Chalk Farm.
A TIDY DROP.--A gla.s.s of spirits, _neat_.
[Ill.u.s.tration: LORD MAYOR'S SHOW AS IT OUGHT TO BE
_Designed by Mr. Punch's Special Processionist_]
[Ill.u.s.tration: ANOTHER SUGGESTION FOR THE LORD MAYOR'S SHOW AS IT OUGHT TO BE]
[Ill.u.s.tration: "'Nuts for the monkeys, sir? Buy a bag o' nuts for the monkeys!"
"I'm not going to the Zoo."
"Ah, well, sir, have some to take home to the children!"]
[Ill.u.s.tration: HYDE PARK, MAY 1
_Country Cousin._ "What is the meaning of this, policeman?"
_Constable._ "Labour day, miss."]
[Ill.u.s.tration: _Boy_ (_to Cabby with somewhat shadowy horse_). "Look 'ere, guv'nor, you'd better tie a knot in 'is tail afore 'e gets wet, or 'e might slip through 'is collar!"]
