The Dragon of Wantley Part 13

"Villain!" cried Geoffrey, seizing the half-extricated body by the throat. "Thy false skin is honester than thyself, and warned us. Back inside!"

The robber's eyes shrivelled to the size of a snake's, as, with no tenderness, the youth grappled with him still entangled, and with hands, feet, and knees drove him into his sh.e.l.l as a hasty traveller tramples his effects into a packing-case.

"See," said Elaine, "how pleasantly we two have you at our disposal.

Shall the neighbours be called to have a sight of the Dragon?"

"What do you want with me?" said Sir Francis, quietly. For he was a philosopher.

"In the first place," answered Geoffrey, "know that thou art caught.

And if I shall spare thee this night, it may well be they'll set thy carcase swinging on the gallows-tree to-morrow morning,--or, being Christmas, the day after."

"I can see my case without thy help," Sir Francis replied. "What next?"

At this, Elaine came to Geoffrey and they whispered together.

[Ill.u.s.tration: The Dragon perceiueth hymself to be entrapped]

"Thy trade is done for," said the youth, at length. "There'll be no more monks of Oyster-le-Main, and no more Dragon of Wantley. But thou and the other curs may live, if ye so choose."

"Through what do I buy my choice?"

"Through a further exhibition of thine art. Thou must play Dragon to-night once again for the last time. This, that I may show thee captive to Sir G.o.dfrey Disseisin."

"And in chains, I think," added Elaine. "There is one behind the post." It had belonged in the bear-pit during the lives of Orlando Crumb and Furioso Bun, two bears trapped expressly for the Baron near Roncevaux.

"After which?" inquired Sir Francis.

"Thou shalt go free, and I will claim this lady's hand from her father, who promised her to any man that brought the Dragon to him dead or alive."

"Papa shall be kept at a distance from you," said Elaine, "and will never suspect in this dimness, if you roar at him thoroughly."

"Then," continued Geoffrey, "I shall lead thee away as my spoil, and the people shall see the lizard-skin after a little while. But thou must journey far from Wantley, and never show face again."

"And go from Oyster-le-Main and the t.i.things?" exclaimed Sir Francis.

"My house and my sustenance?"

"Sustain thyself elsewhere," said Geoffrey; "I care not how."

"No!" said Sir Francis. "I'll not do this."

"Then we call Sir G.o.dfrey. The Baron will not love thee very much, seeing how well he loves his Burgundy thou hast drank. Thou gavest him sermons on cold spring-water. He'll remember that. I think thou'lt be soon hanging. So choose."

The Knight of the Voracious Stomach was silent.

"This is a pretty scheme thou hast," he presently said. "And not thine own. She has taught thee this wit, I'll be bound. Mated to her, thou'lt prosper, I fear."

"Come, thy choice," said Geoffrey, sternly.

A sour smile moved the lips of Sir Francis. "Well," he said, "it has been good while it lasted. Yes, I consent. Our interests lie together.

See how Necessity is the mother of Friends.h.i.+p, also."

The mask was drawn over his face, and they wound the chain about the great body.

"There must be sounds of fighting," said Elaine. "Make them when I am gone into the house."

"If I had strangled thee in thy prison, which was in my mind," said the voice of the hidden speaker, "this folly we--but there. Let it go, and begin."

Then they fell to making a wonderful disturbance. The Dragon's voice was lifted in horrid howlings; and the young knight continually bawled with all his lungs. They chased as children in a game do: forward, back, and across to nowhere, knocking the barrels, clanking and clas.h.i.+ng, up between the rows and around corners; and the dry earth was ground under their feet and swept from the floor upward in a fine floating yellow powder that they sucked down into their windpipes, while still they hustled and jangled and banged and coughed and grew dripping wet, so the dust and the water mingled and ran black streams along their bodies from the neck downwards, tickling their backs and stomachs mightily. When the breath was no longer inside them, they stopped to listen.

The house was stone still, and no noise came, save always the wind's same cheerless blowing.

"How much more of this before they will awaken?" exclaimed Geoffrey, in indignation. "'Tis a scandal people should sleep so."

"They are saying their prayers," said Sir Francis.

"It is a pity thou art such a miscreant," Geoffrey said, heartily; "otherwise I could sweat myself into a good-humour with thee."

But Sir Francis replied with coldness, "It is easy for the upper hand to laugh."

"We must at it again," said Geoffrey; "and this time I will let them hear thou art conquered." The din and hubbub recommenced. And Mistletoe could hear it where she quaked inside her closet holding the door with both hands. And the Baron could hear it. He was locked in the bath-room, dreadfully sorry he had not gone to the Crusade. Quite unknowingly in his alarm he had laid hold of a cord that set going the shower-bath; but he gave no heed at all to this trifle. And every man and woman in the house heard the riot, from the scullion up through the cook to Popham, who had unstrapped his calves before retiring, so that now his lean shanks knocked together like hockey-sticks. Little Whelpdale, freezing in his s.h.i.+rt-tail under the bed, was crying piteously upon all Saints to forget about his sins and deliver him.

Only Miss Elaine standing in her room listened with calm; and she with not much, being on the threshold of a chance that might turn untoward so readily. Presently a victorious shouting came from far down through the dark.

"He is mine!" the voice bellowed. "I have laid him low. The Dragon is taken." At this she hastened to summon Sir G.o.dfrey.

"Why, where can he be?" she exclaimed, stopping in astonishment at his room, empty and the door open wide.

Down in the cellar the voice continued to call on all people to come and see the Dragon of Wantley. Also Elaine heard a splas.h.i.+ng and dripping that sounded in the bath-room. So she ran to the door and knocked.

"You can't come in!" said the Baron angrily.

"Papa! They've caught the Dragon. Oh why are you taking your bath at such a time?"

"Taking my grandmother!" Sir G.o.dfrey retorted in great dudgeon. But he let the rope go, and the shower stopped running. "Go to your room," he added. "I told you to lock your door. This Dragon----"

"But he's caught, papa," cried Elaine through the key-hole. "Don't you hear me? Geoff----somebody has got him."

"How now?" said the Baron, unlocking the door and peering out. "What's all this?"

His dressing-gown was extremely damp, for stray spouts from the shower-bath had squirted over him. Fortunately, the breast-plate underneath had kept him dry as far as it went.

"Hum," he said, after he had listened to the voice in the cellar.

"This is something to be cautious over."

"If the people of this house do not come soon to bear witness of my conquest," said the voice in tones of thunder, "I'll lead this Dragon through every chamber of it myself."

"d.a.m.num absque injuria!" shrieked Sir G.o.dfrey, and uttered much more horrible language entirely unfit for general use. "What the Jeofailes does the varlet mean by threatening an Englishman in his own house? I should like to know who lives here? I should like to know who I am?"

The Baron flew down the entry in a rage. He ran to his bedside and pulled his sword from under the pillows where he always kept it at night with his sun-dial.