Samantha at the World's Fair Part 60

Wall, as I said, we didn't git home till pitch dark, and then I drempt of fish all night, and eels, and alligators, and such. It wuz tegus.

[Ill.u.s.tration: I drempt of fish all night.]

The next mornin' Josiah Allen met me all riz up with a new idee.

He had been out to buy a new pair of suspenders, his havin' gin out the day before; and he come to our room, where I wuz calmly settin'

a-bastin' in some clean cotton lace into the sleeves of my alpaca dress.

And sez he right out abrup, with no preamble, "Samantha, less go down to the Fair Ground in a whale."

"In a whale?" sez I; "are you a loonatick, or what duz ail you, to try to make a pair of Jonahses of us at our age?"

"Wall," sez he, "they have 'em here to carry folks down to the Fair, I know, for I hearn it straight, and I should think we wuz jest the right age to go as easy as possible, and try experiments."

"Wall," sez I firmly, "I hain't a-goin' to try no such experiment as that. If the Lord called me to tackle a whale, I would tackle it, but I hain't had no callin', and I hain't goin' to try to ride out in no whale."

"I'm a-callin' you," sez he.

"Wall," sez I dryly, "you hain't the Deity--no, indeed, fur from it."

"Wall," sez he, "I'd love to go, Samantha. What a glorious piece of news to carry back to Jonesville, that we rid out in a whale. In the old Jonesville meetin'-house now, when Elder Minkley is a-preachin' on Jonah--and you know he trots him out a dozen times a year as a warnin'--how you and I could lift up our heads and tost 'em, and how the necks of the Jonesvillians would be craned round to look at us--we two, who had rid out in a whale--we had been right there, and knew how it wuz."

"I don't want to show off," sez I, "and I don't want any necks craned or tosted on account of my gettin' into a whale and ridin' it;" and then I sez, "Good land! what won't Chicago do next?"

And I added, "It don't surprise me a mite; it hain't no more of a wonder than lots of things I have seen here. I might a known if Chicago had sot its mind on havin' a whale to transport folks to the World's Fair she'd a done it, but I won't tackle the job."

"There it is," sez he gloomily, "I never make arrangements to distinguish myself and make a name, but you must break it up. I had lotted on this, Samantha," sez he.

He looked sad and deprested, and though I was bound not to give in and go, yet I made some inquiries.

"How many does the whale carry? What makes you think we could both git into it?"

Sez Josiah, "It carries 5000 at a time."

I felt weak as a cat, jest as I had felt time and agin sence I had come to Chicago.

"Wall," sez I in weak axents, and dumbfoundered, "any whale story I could hear about Chicago wouldn't surprise me a mite."

And I wiped my brow on my white linen handkerchief, for though the idee didn't surprise me none, it started the sweat.

Sez Josiah, "It is 225 feet long, and has a fountain in it, and a skylight 138 feet long."

But jest at that minute, before I could frame a reply, even if I could have found a frame queer-shaped enough to hold my curious--curious feelin's--

Miss Plank knocked at the door and said she wuz ready to go--we had made arrangements to go together that mornin'--and Josiah tackled her about the whale; and sez she briskly--

"Oh, yes; the whaleback Christopher Columbus! It would be a good idee to go to the grounds in it; you can go down in it in half an hour--it is only seven or eight milds."

So we fell in with her idee; and bein' ust to the place, she took the lead, and also the street cars, and we soon found ourselves on board the biggest floatin' s.h.i.+p I ever laid eyes on. And I couldn't see as it looked much like a whale, unless it wuz that it wuz long, and kinder pinted, and turned up at both ends, some the shape of a whale.

Wall, I guess the hull five thousand folks wuz on board, and had brung their relations on both sides. It looked like it, and we steamed along by the sh.o.r.e for quite a spell, the city a-layin' in plain view for mild after mild--or that is, in as plain view as it could be under its envelopin' curtain of smoke.

But bimeby the smoke all cleared away, the air wuz clear and pure, and the lake lay fair and placid fur off as we could see. It might a been the ocean, for all we could tell, for you can't see no further than you _can_, anyway, and you can't see no further than that on the Atlantic or the Pacific.

Way beyend what you can't see might stretch thousands and thousands of milds and a new continent; or it might be a loggin' camp, or Kalamazoo.

It don't make no difference to your feelin's, it has all the illimitable expanse, the vastness of the great ocean.

So it wuz with the outlook on the flas.h.i.+n' blue waters on that magic mornin'.

And pretty soon the White City riz up like a city of bewilderin' beauty and enchantment, with the sun a-lookin' down from a blue sky, and lightin' up the tall, white walls, and gilded domes, and towers, and minarets. And as we floated along by Jackson Park, and could git a plain view of the perfect buildin's--the lagoons with fairy boats a-skimmin'

over the sparklin' surface--in fact, in plain view of the hull vast, bewilderin' seen of matchless splendor--why, I declare I felt almost as if I wuz took back clear into the Arabian Nights Entertainments, and magic seens wuz bein' unfolded before my enraptured vision.

Why, I almost felt that my Josiah wuz a genii, and Miss Plank a geniess.

I wouldn't a wondered a mite any minute if a carpet had dropped down for us to git onto, and we floated off into Bagdad. I felt queer--extremely.

But Bagdad nor no other Dad wuz ever so enchantin'ly lovely as the seen outspread before our eyes. As surpa.s.sin'ly beautiful as the Exposition is from every side, hind side and fore side, and from top to bottom, it is, I do believe, most radiantly lovely from the water approach.

You needn't be a mite afraid of gittin' your idees too riz up about the onspeakable beauty of the seen. No matter if they wuz riz up higher than you ever drempt of rizin' 'em up, instead of fallin', they will, so to speak, find themselves on the ground floor--in the suller, as you may say--so fur up beyend your highest imagination is the reality of that wonderful White City of the West--

Magic city that has sprung up there amidst the blue waters and green forests like a dream of enchantment, a hymn of glory, with not one false, harsh note in it to mar the glory and perfectness of the song.

Now, I have had my idees riz up lots of times--they have riz and fell so much that my muse has fairly lamed herself time and agin, and went round limpin' for some time.

And Josiah had told me time and agin, as I would go on about the beauty I expected to see at the World's Fair, "Samantha, you expect too much; you will get dissapinted; tain't Heaven you are goin' to; anybody would most expect, to hear you go on, that you expected to see the New Jerusalem--you are goin' to be dissapinted."

Wall, sure enough I wuz, but the dissapintment wuz on the other side--I hadn't expected half nor a quarter nor a millionth part enough. My muse instead of comin' down from the heights that I spozed she wuz on a-cungerin' up that seen--to use metafor--she had always, as you may say, sot down flat on the ground.

Why, I couldn't do justice to it in words, nor Josiah couldn't, nor Miss Plank couldn't, not if we all on us had a dictionary in one hand and a English reader in the other, and had travelled down there that beautiful mornin' with a bra.s.s band.

I wuz so wropped up in my bewildered and extatic admiration that my companions wuz entirely lost from sight, when Miss Plank sez--

"Here we are, ready to land." And indeed I see on comin' to myself that the hull 5000, and their relations on both sides, wuz on the move, and it wuz time for me to disembark myself, which I proceeded to do, a-follered by the forms of my Josiah and Miss Plank. She stepped out quite briskly over her namesake, and so did Josiah. They didn't take in the full beauty and grandeur of the seen as I did--no, indeed.

[Ill.u.s.tration: I proceeded to disembark, a-follered by the forms of my Josiah and Miss Plank.]

They could think of vittles even at that time, for I heard Josiah say--

"We will settle on some place to go that is handy to a restaurant."

And Miss Plank picked one where the biled corned beef wuz delicious, and the pies and coffee--

Corned beef! oh, my heart, in such a time as this! Beef corned in such a hour! But I forgive 'em and pitied 'em, for it wuz my duty.

Wall, we told Josiah he should have his way that mornin', and go where he wanted to--and he wanted to tackle Machinery Hall; consequently we tackled it.

And how many acres big do you suppose this buildin' wuz? Seventeen acres and a half is the size of the floor--

Jest half a acre more than Silenas Bobbetses farm, that he broke old Squire Bobbetses will to git, and he and his twin brother Zebulin come to hands and blows about, in front of the Jonesville post-office.