Lincoln's Yarns and Stories - BestLightNovel.com
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HANDSOMEST MAN ON EARTH.
One day Thaddeus Stevens called at the White House with an elderly woman, whose son had been in the army, but for some offense had been court-martialed and sentenced to death. There were some extenuating circ.u.mstances, and after a full hearing the President turned to Stevens and said: "Mr. Stevens, do you think this is a case which will warrant my interference?"
"With my knowledge of the facts and the parties," was the reply, "I should have no hesitation in granting a pardon."
"Then," returned Mr. Lincoln, "I will pardon him," and proceeded forthwith to execute the paper.
The grat.i.tude of the mother was too deep for expression, save by her tears, and not a word was said between her and Stevens until they were half way down the stairs on their pa.s.sage out, when she suddenly broke forth in an excited manner with the words:
"I knew it was a copperhead lie!"
"What do you refer to, madam?" asked Stevens.
"Why, they told me he was an ugly-looking man," she replied, with vehemence. "He is the handsomest man I ever saw in my life."
THAT c.o.o.n CAME DOWN.
"Lincoln's Last Warning" was the t.i.tle of a cartoon which appeared in "Harper's Weekly," on October 11, 1862. Under the picture was the text:
"Now if you don't come down I'll cut the tree from under you."
This ill.u.s.tration was peculiarly apt, as, on the 1st of January, 1863, President Lincoln issued his great Emanc.i.p.ation Proclamation, declaring all slaves in the United States forever free. "Old Abe" was a handy man with the axe, he having split many thousands of rails with its keen edge. As the "Slavery c.o.o.n" wouldn't heed the warning, Lincoln did cut the tree from under him, and so he came down to the ground with a heavy thump.
This Act of Emanc.i.p.ation put an end to the notion of the Southern slave holders that involuntary servitude was one of the "sacred inst.i.tutions"
on the Continent of North America. It also demonstrated that Lincoln was thoroughly in earnest when he declared that he would not only save the Union, but that he meant what he said in the speech wherein he a.s.serted, "This Nation cannot exist half slave and half free."
WROTE "PIECES" WHEN VERY YOUNG.
At fifteen years of age "Abe" wrote "pieces," or compositions, and even some doggerel rhyme, which he recited, to the great amus.e.m.e.nt of his playmates.
One of his first compositions was against cruelty to animals. He was very much annoyed and pained at the conduct of the boys, who were in the habit of catching terrapins and putting coals of fire on their backs, which thoroughly disgusted Abraham.
"He would chide us," said "Nat" Grigsby, "tell us it was wrong, and would write against it."
When eighteen years old, "Abe" wrote a "piece" on "National Politics,"
and it so pleased a lawyer friend, named Pritchard, that the latter had it printed in an obscure paper, thereby adding much to the author's pride. "Abe" did not conceal his satisfaction. In this "piece" he wrote, among other things:
"The American government is the best form of government for an intelligent people. It ought to be kept sound, and preserved forever, that general education should be fostered and carried all over the country; that the Const.i.tution should be saved, the Union perpetuated and the laws revered, respected and enforced."
"TRY TO STEER HER THROUGH."
John A. Logan and a friend of Illinois called upon Lincoln at Willard's Hotel, Was.h.i.+ngton, February 23d, the morning of his arrival, and urged a vigorous, firm policy.
Patiently listening, Lincoln replied seriously but cheerfully:
"As the country has placed me at the helm of the s.h.i.+p, I'll try to steer her through."
GRAND, GLOOMY AND PECULIAR.
Lincoln was a marked and peculiar young man. People talked about him.
His studious habits, his greed for information, his thorough mastery of the difficulties of every new position in which he was placed, his intelligence on all matters of public concern, his unwearying good-nature, his skill in telling a story, his great athletic power, his quaint, odd ways, his uncouth appearance--all tended to bring him in sharp contrast with the dull mediocrity by which he was surrounded.
Denton Offutt, his old employer, said, after having had a conversation with Lincoln, that the young man "had talent enough in him to make a President."
ON THE WAY TO GETTYSBURG.
When Lincoln was on his way to the National Cemetery at Gettysburg, an old gentleman told him that his only son fell on Little Round Top at Gettysburg, and he was going to look at the spot. Mr. Lincoln replied: "You have been called on to make a terrible sacrifice for the Union, and a visit to that spot, I fear, will open your wounds afresh.
"But, oh, my dear sir, if we had reached the end of such sacrifices, and had nothing left for us to do but to place garlands on the graves of those who have already fallen, we could give thanks even amidst our tears; but when I think of the sacrifices of life yet to be offered, and the hearts and homes yet to be made desolate before this dreadful war is over, my heart is like lead within me, and I feel at times like hiding in deep darkness." At one of the stopping places of the train, a very beautiful child, having a bunch of rosebuds in her hand, was lifted up to an open window of the President's car. "Floweth for the President."
The President stepped to the window, took the rosebuds, bent down and kissed the child, saying, "You are a sweet little rosebud yourself. I hope your life will open into perpetual beauty and goodness."
STOOD UP THE LONGEST.
There was a rough gallantry among the young people; and Lincoln's old comrades and friends in Indiana have left many tales of how he "went to see the girls," of how he brought in the biggest back-log and made the brightest fire; of how the young people, sitting around it, watching the way the sparks flew, told their fortunes.
He helped pare apples, sh.e.l.l corn and crack nuts. He took the girls to meeting and to spelling school, though he was not often allowed to take part in the spelling-match, for the one who "chose first" always chose "Abe" Lincoln, and that was equivalent to winning, as the others knew that "he would stand up the longest."
A MORTIFYING EXPERIENCE.
A lady reader or elocutionist came to Springfield in 1857. A large crowd greeted her. Among other things she recited "Nothing to Wear," a piece in which is described the perplexities that beset "Miss Flora McFlimsy"
in her efforts to appear fas.h.i.+onable.
In the midst of one stanza in which no effort is made to say anything particularly amusing, and during the reading of which the audience manifested the most respectful silence and attention, some one in the rear seats burst out with a loud, coa.r.s.e laugh, a sudden and explosive guffaw.
It startled the speaker and audience, and kindled a storm of unsuppressed laughter and applause. Everybody looked back to ascertain the cause of the demonstration, and were greatly surprised to find that it was Mr. Lincoln.
He blushed and squirmed with the awkward diffidence of a schoolboy.
What caused him to laugh, no one was able to explain. He was doubtless wrapped up in a brown study, and recalling some amusing episode, indulged in laughter without realizing his surroundings. The experience mortified him greatly.