Don’t Tell Me This Is the True History of the Three Kingdoms! Vol 2 Chapter 6

“First things first, let me thank you from the bottom of my heart, for saving my father.” The moment I entered the tent, I was greeted with the sight of Meng De flicking her long hair as she came up to welcome me.

Meng De was still the same as always, with that signature confident smile on her face.

“Ah, it’s nothing much. I just happened to see him and trouble and so I saved him.” I said as I walked towards her. “But did your father safely reach Chang’an?”

“He reached quite a while back, and when he saw me, the first thing he talked about was not about the robbery, but you.” Meng De said meaningfully. ‘Looks like my father has taken quite a liking to you.”

“He thinks too highly of me.”

But at least I can be relieved about the matter of Cao Song, though this begs the question of why would Meng De still…

“Please sit, Xuan De.” Meng De gestured for us to take a seat, and continued. “We haven’t met for about a month now.”

“That’s right. Back then, you said you were going to get back Chang’an and the Son of Heaven before you left Luoyang. Not even a month pa.s.sed before you accomplished what you said you would.” I sat down as I said so, and gestured for the rest to do so as well.

“Yes, now the new capital has been set to be Xuchang where the Son of Heaven will lead the Imperial Court once more.” Meng De said as she ordered her subordinates to bring drinks over. “But the world is still far too chaotic and just the words of the Son of Heaven is not enough to stand down and recognise his authority.”

“… Meng De really has a lot to do huh.”

Wine was brought while I said so.

“… Before long, I should be formally appointed as Imperial Chancellor.” Meng De said as she circled the rim of the cup with her index finger. “When that time comes, all feudal lords nationwide will probably say that I am controlling the Son of Heaven.”

That will definitely come to pa.s.s.

“That isn’t something good to wear…”

“I understand, there will be many who will gather under the banner of ridding the Han traitor and come for my head. Just like when we gathered to destroy Dong Zhuo.” Meng De brought the wine cup close. “Or perhaps, people have already done so.”

When I heard this, my palms began sweating.

“Would Meng De be referring to her father being robbed?”

“Un, to put it simply, yes.”

Meng De’s laugh hadn’t diminished in the least, but I could no longer detect a shred of goodwill behind it.

“Is that the reason why you have come to conquer Xu state?”

“Un, to put it simply, yes.” Meng De continued to smile as she closed her eyes.

“But isn’t your father alright? Moreover, Lord Tao Qian did not mean to–”

“Are you certain?” Meng De suddenly opened her eyes and looked straight into mine.

“Eh?”

“From what I know, though the Governor of Xu state is very old, he is still very good in his judgement of people.” Meng De began to speak in a serious tone as she held her chin. “A person who knows how to judge others would actually place a man who might succ.u.mb to greed in charge of protecting my father… Is this not a ploy of sorts?”

I looked back to the Xu state 3, but the look on their faces told me they had never considered this possibility.

(TL: Throughout the novel, the 3 girls are referred to as a collective several times. In such cases, they will be called the “Xu state 3”.)

“To be honest, I have nothing to hide.” Meng De continued. “Though my father is alive and well, I am truly enraged about this whole affair. And so I have decided to let this rage out on Xu state.”

Meng De said resolutely, and emptied the contents of the wine cup into her.

“… Meng De,” I said as I looked at my own cup, any desire to drink long gone. “As the reinforcements from Beihai, I cannot let you all take Xu state.”

“Cannot, or do not want to?” Meng De asked probingly. “As an outsider, what could possibly compel you to fight this much for Xu state?”

… In this situation, I better not mention the matter of Tao Qian giving me Xu state.

“Lord Cao Cao.” “Lord Liu Bei is now the Governor-in-lieu of Xu state.” “That’s how it is.”

“Hou~~~” Meng De’s face had ‘no wonder’ written all over it.

“Ah! Not yet!” I hurriedly retorted them.

… Why did these 3 have to say it.

“In any case, even if you are the Governor of Xu state now, when the time comes, I’ll still come for Xu state.” Meng De returned to her confident smile from the start.

“I understand… But please I beseech you, for the sake of the commoners of Xu state, please don’t wage a war.” I lowered my head as I said so.

“…” Meng De did not reply to this.

Un, this should be impossible now. And now even I don’t know whether Lord Tao Qian was just being senile or if he intended to kill Cao Song.

“I will think about it over again. Sieging a city will bring us no small loss given that you are around.” Meng De said, seeming to have come around and gave some way. “Alright, the tasteless affairs are now concluded. Let us have a more relaxing chat now.”

“Un, alright.” I took down my negotiating countenance. I wasn’t satisfied with this outcome, as it couldn’t be considered favourable. “But why did Meng De insist on me bringing Feng Xian over as well?”

“Nothing much. I just wanted to see who it was who could match 6 of my finest generals… Hou hou~~~~~” Meng De sized up Feng Xian who was standing behind me. “I must say… This dog is quite cute huh.”

That’s all you have to say? And it’s not even about Feng Xian.

“Right!” On hearing her mention the dog, Feng Xian seemed to have become a different person entirely and began to excitedly introduce Meng De to it.

Seeing them happily play with the dog, I turned to speak with the Xu state 3.

(Why did you all have to mention to Meng De about the matter of giving Xu state to me?)

(It’s nothing much.) (Since Lord Cao Cao has said as much, she probably already knows this matter.) (Instead of hiding this, it’s better to speak the truth at this time.)

(But this hasn’t been decided yet right…)

(We decided it for you.)

3 people with different expressions and tones said the exact same words.

(But no matter what you all say, as long as I don’t receive the official seal, you all can’t do anything to me.)

(Tch.)

(Can you 3 don’t click your tongues at me at the same time?)

Having Xu state city was a good thing, but now it was a burden.

(Lord Xuan De! Lord Xuan De!)

(Ah? Ah! Hua Tuo, you’re here.)

(Lord Xuan De is too much, I’ve always been around~~~)

Un? But why has Hua Tuo followed along as well?

(Please help me tell Lord Cao Cao that I have something to report, it’s urgent!)

What could it be? But seeing the serious look on Hua Tuo, it probably concerns life and death.

“Meng De! … Umm, please put down the dog first, I have something to talk to you about.”

“Un? What is it huh?” Meng De replied me half-heartedly.

I gestured to Hua Tuo with my chin to get her to speak. Hua Tuo nervously took a step forward and bowed before she began speaking.

“Ju-just now when the 7 generals were in their duel, though I can’t see too clearly, something did catch my attention.” Hua Tuo said and took a step back. “From looking at their movements, there is 1 amongst your 6 who has a severe condition in their eyes. If we do not remove the problematic eyeball in time, she could lose both eyes.”

(You can tell even that?) I whispered to Hua Tuo.

(Leaving aside everything else, even though that person is clearly right-handed, she always slashed from her left, wouldn’t that mean that her right eye has issues?)

I didn’t think that Hua Tuo could catch such details even with her horrid short-sightedness.

“Un, this is a serious matter indeed. You, go and bring Dian Wei, Xu Chu, the Xiahou sisters, Yue Jin and Li Dian here.” Meng De ordered her subordinate with a serious tone, before turning to Hua Tuo. “In a while when they have arrived, please confirm who it is you were talking about and then please proceed with treatment.”

“Yes.” Hua Tuo bowed with relief when she heard so.

Feels like all of them are important named generals…

And are all 6 of them female?

(TL: Were you just looking at Feng Xian?)

“Xiao E! It’s her, she was so strong from the very beginning when we fought each other one on one.~~~” Xu Chu exclaimed as she pointed as Feng Xian. And the one she was speaking to was… Xiao E? Is it E Lai? Then the girl by her side is Dian Wei?

(TL: Dian Wei’s courtesy name is E Lai (p.r.o.nounced as “er” but without the r sound). But Xu Chu calls her xiao E, or little E. I’m leaving this as the former because the latter just sounds r.e.t.a.r.ded, especially when the person in question might not even be little. If the person’s name contains a Chinese character with the pinyin of “xiao” I will write it in uppercase (Xiao) but if it’s a means of addressing the person, it will be in lowercase (xiao) unless it’s the beginning of a sentence.)

“That’s right. Just from the several blows I exchanged with her, facing off against her felt like being a cake that was about to be smashed by a morningstar.”

What sort of a.n.a.logy is that!!

“Ah, the 2 of you are pretty good yourselves, and have great strength. The only thing you both lack would be balance.” Feng Xian said humbly on hearing their judgement of herself.

“Un, but this really can’t be helped, see.” As she said so, Dian Wei pushed up her huge b.r.e.a.s.t.s with a helpless smile, and I understood instantly.

I looked at Dian Wei, who was just barely taller than Xu Chu, with a short fringe while most of her hair was combed back and tied in a small ponytail… And was another oppai loli like Xu Chu. If Yi De saw her, she would probably get mad again.

“I give her skills 100 marks. What about you, Yue Jin?”

“Li Dian, if it were me, I’d say she gets 99. More or less perfect, but still not quite there yet.”

“What’s with giving marks…” Feng Xian did not know how to reply to that, nor did she quite understand what they meant. But not understanding this sort of thing is fine.

But now that they addressed each other, I know they are Li Dian and Yue Jin.

Both were tall, wore a serious look, had their arms folded across their chests, and each wore a hat. Yue Jin tied her hair in a braid while Li Dian’s fringe covered one eye.

“It’s her!” Hua Tuo, who had been walking around amongst them, suddenly shouted while pointing at a girl. “Seeing it up close makes me certain that we must extract it as soon as possible.”

“Oh~~~ Big sister, you won a prize!” A girl who looked like the one Hua Tuo was pointing to said enthusiastically.

“Eh?! Extract!!” The girl was shocked and seemed to know that her eye had issues and promptly turned her face away. “My, my eye is fine.”

“Yuan Rang, you must be obedient and accept treatment~~~” Meng De said calmly as she sat by the side.

Then that means this is Xiahou Dun. She is quite a bit taller than me with long black hair that was messy and unkempt, and wore a stern and serious look.

(TL: In the original, Xiahou Dun lost his left eye from a stray arrow after a duel with Lu Bu.)

“Meng De! It’s not as if you don’t know I’m afraid of pain!” Yes, that stern looking girl started whining after hearing that she had to receive treatment. “If it wasn’t because of my fear of pain from injuries, I wouldn’t have bothered training my martial skills to such a high level.”

What kind of logic is that huh.

“If you don’t extract this eye, you will lose both eyes.” Hua Tuo said with emphasis on the latter half. “I have ‘mafeisan’ here, it won’t hurt.”

“No, I won’t do it!” Xiahou Dun shook her head vigorously and would have looked just like a spoiled kid if she was about to roll on the ground. “Even if it doesn’t hurt, when I open my eyes, I’ll lose half of my vision, who can beat that huh!”

“Yuan Rang, why are you acting like a ki? … Eh! Eh! Eh! Miao Cai, stop making fun of your big sister and hold her down!” Meng De felt like she couldn’t get through to her and ordered Xiahou Yuan to catch her.

Xiahou Yuan and Xiahou Dun looked very similar, albeit Xiahou Yuan’s straighter hair and a more playful personality.

“Big sister, it will be alright.” Xiahou Yuan said as she approached Xiahou Dun.

“Miao Cai, there’s fried chicken there!”

“Where?” Xiahou Yuan gullibly looked over.

“An opening!” Xiahou Dun seized the moment when her little sister was distracted and dashed out of the tent.

“d.a.m.n! Everyone else, get her now!” Meng De seemed to have not expected her plan to fail and tapped her head as she said so. “No matter what we must find her and bring her here. I will not let her lose both eyes for the sake of keeping one.”

All of us ran out, only to see Xiahou Dun standing about 100 meters away from us.

“n.o.body come close! You should know that no one can catch up to me on foot!”

Looks like she is still open to discussion.

“Come back, big sister. It’s only one eye. No need to be so afraid!”

“My dear little sister, if you have nothing good to say, then don’t say anything! The one who is losing an eye is me, not you!”

Now that I think about it, it is quite a momentuous operation and she hasn’t had any time to prepare herself at all.

“Well then General Xiahou, why don’t we take it easy for now? And proceed with treatment when you’re mentally ready?” I suggested.

“…” Xiahou Dun thought it over and probably felt like the stand-off was not going to end in a favourable outcome for her anyway and decided to accept my suggestion. “Then, let’s go with–”

*Whoosh*– The sound of something piercing through the air came from beside my ear.

“Ah!!!!” Xiahou Dun immediately screamed and held her face as she sank to the ground.

Taking a closer look, I saw that Xiahou Dun had been shot by an arrow.

“Big sister?!” “Yuan Rang!” “General Xiahou!”

Meng De and her other subordinate generals were visibly shocked and bewildered by what happened.

“Please don’t be alarmed everyone.” Just then, Feng Xian who was holding a bow from behind us said calmly. “Don’t worry, what I shot was her bad eye, and so we need not bother wrangling with her… Un? Why does everyone look like they want to laugh and cry at the same time?”

You really are efficient huh…

“Ah!!~~~~” Xiahou Dun who lay on the ground suddenly cried out from the pain.

“Oh right! There was that!” Xiahou Yuan said as she snapped her fingers as though she had realised something. “Meng De, I’ll add another arrow now. Not to worry, my archery is top notch.”

“Someone else has already shot her, how many arrows do you want to put in her huh~~~” Meng De said as she sighed.

“Ah!!~~~ It hurts so bad!! Ow!~~” Still screaming.

“Aiya, not only do you have stellar martial skills, your archery is on point too!”

“I am unworthy of such praise. I only dabbled a little in archery in my childhood.”

“Oh? Please do share with us your experiences. It may help us improve our archery.” As they said so, the 5 Cao Army generals gathered over at Feng Xian to hear about her experiences.

“Ah~~~~~ My eye!! My eye!!” Still screaming.

“Cut it out you lot… Quickly haul her into the tent, all the soldiers are watching.” Meng De said calmly as she gave a helpless smile.

“I hope that Yuan Rang is fine after this. Lord Hua Tuo, please take a look at Yuan Rang to see if there are any other injuries. If not, please proceed with treatment for the eye.. Ah, don’t forget to use that ‘mafeisan’ of yours.”

By the way, Xiahou Dun was still screaming and moaning all this while.

“90.”

“I say 85.”

Why are you giving marks at this time…

In the end, I and the Xu state 3 were the ones to carry Xiahou Dun into the tent.

“Ah~ My eye~” Half a day has gone by and the surgery has concluded with the eye cleanly removed. Xiahou Dun was now lying on the bed and uttering the same lines as before with glazed over eyes.

“Maa, don’t be too sad big sister. It can still grow back in future. Come, I’ll give you an eyepatch.”

“Who do you think you’re kidding!! Since when do eyes grow back huh?!”

Xiahou Yuan, that’s not how you comfort someone…

“Xuan De, thank you for today.” Meng De said with a smile as she s.h.i.+fted her gaze from Yuan Rang to me, “If it weren’t for you and Lord Hua Tuo, I could have lost one of my best generals.”

“It’s nothing much.”

“Saving the dying and curing the sick is my rightful duty. Ah, by the way, General Xiahou better not move around too much in this period in case the wound ruptures.”

“Though it will be a bit difficult, I got it.” Meng De said as she looked at the energetic Xiahou Dun helplessly. “It’s not getting any early, you all should return soon.”

“Alright,” I nodded, and began to broach the original topic, “Ah, about the matter of Xu state…”

With our strength now, there is no way we can face Meng De’s troops. If Meng De begins her offensive tomorrow, then the city will fall tomorrow. If Meng De begins her offensive the day after, then the city will fall the day after.

“Un, I understand.” Meng De said after closing her eyes in thought for a while before facing me with a frown. “But no matter what happens, I have no intention of retreating.”

“…”

You still plan on advancing then…

“Seeing how you look now, you probably don’t get it.” Meng De continued with a smile. “Let me say it once more. No matter what happens, I have no intention of retreating.”

Un… So what is it with that line?

Just then the Xu state 3 behind me pulled on my s.h.i.+rt.

(It means that the negotiation was a success.) (Not retreating doesn’t equate to advancing.) (That is to say Lord Cao Cao has changed her plans and is now using her supposed offensive on Xu state as a guise to see what the other feudal lords will do in response, before making her next move.)

The 3 behind me explained in excited whispers.

Oh! So that’s what it’s about~~~~~

“Ah ah, in that case, thank you from the bottom of my heart, Meng De.”

“No need for thanks. I just feel that doing things this way is more aligned to my goals. And besides, I get to make you owe me a favour.” Meng De said with a smile.

(TL: She can’t just retreat either. If she does so, then her standing in the Imperial Court will plummet and the other feudal lords will make light of her.)

Even though we’d gotten nowhere at all earlier, in just a short while after all that fuss with Xiahou Dun, we made significant progress…

Alright, this should be good enough for now.

“We’ll be leaving then.”

I said, and led the others to exit the tent. Just before I left, I turned and saluted Meng De and her generals.

“Un, go on. In this period, if there’s anything, just come and find me. If I have anything, I’ll find you as well.” Meng De said as she raised a hand she folded across the chest and waved at me. “Maybe I’ll bring my troops along as well.”

Wu!

“… Haha, just kidding. Don’t need to look so fearful.”

(TL: Just like a guy teasing the girl he likes.)

I only hope it really is just a joke.

As I thought so, I returned her smile with a helpless one, and led the Xu state 3 and Hua Tuo out of the tent.

As I was exiting the tent, I could still hear the voices from inside.

“Miao Cai, get a cup of water for your big sister.”

“Oh, just so happens there’s one bowl of water on the table here. Here, big sister.”

“Un… What water is this? Why is there white fungus inside?”

(TL: White fungus has many names, you can Google it. Basically, it’s one of those ingredients in traditional Chinese medicine and food as well.)

Well, Xiahou Dun does need to eat and rest well after all.

“A-re? I seem to have left General Xiahou Dun’s eyeball behind… I wanted to bring it back for my medical research too.” Hua Tuo said sadly as we walked on.

Left behind? … Could it be!!

“… Hua Tuo, about the eyeball, where did you leave it?”

“I left in a small bowl of water on a table in the tent.”

A single line of sweat streamed down my head on hearing Hua Tuo’s reply.