The Works of Aphra Behn Volume I Part 88

_Hau._ By the Goodness of yours, you should be none, ha, ha, ha. Did I not meet with him there, _Gload_, hah? But pray refresh my Memory, and let me know you; I come to seek a Father amongst you here, one Don _Carlo_.

_Car._ Am I not the Man, Sir?

_Hau._ How the Devil should I know that now, unless by instinct?

_Glo._ The old Man is mad, and must be humour'd.

_Hau._ Cry you Mercy, Sir, I vow I had quite forgot you. Sir, I hope Donna _Euphemia_--

_Car._ Oh, Sir, she's in a much better Humour than when you saw her last, complies with our Desires more than I cou'd hope or wish.

_Hau._ Why look you here again-- I ask'd after her Health, not her Humour.

_Car._ I know not what Arts you made use of, but she's strangely taken with your Conversation and Person.

_Glo._ Truly, Sir, you are mightily beholden to her, that she should have all this good Will to your Person and Conversation before she sees you.

_Hau._ Ay, so I am; therefore, Sir, I desire to see your Daughter, for I shall hardly be so generous as she has been, and be quits with her before I see her.

_Car._ Why, Sir, I hop'd you lik'd her when you saw her last.

_Hau._ Stark mad-- I saw her last! why, what the Devil do you mean?

I never saw her in all my Life, man. Stark mad, as I am true Dutch-- [Aside.

_Car._ A Lover always thinks the time tedious: But here's my Daughter.

Enter _Euphemia_ and _Olinda_.

_Hau._ Ay, one of these must be she: but 'tis a Wonder I should not know which she is by instinct.

[Aside.

[Stands looking very simply on both.

_Euph._ This is not _Alonzo_-- has he betray'd me? [Aside.

_Car._ Go, Sir, she expects you.

_Hau._ Your pardon, Sir; let her come to me, if she will, I'm sure she knows me better than I do her.

_Glo._ How should she know you, Sir?

_Hau._ How? by instinct, you Fool, as all the rest of the House does: don't you, fair Mistress?

_Euph._ I know you--

_Hau._ Yes, you know me; you need not be so coy mun, the old Man has told me all.

_Euph._ What has he told you?-- I am ruin'd. [Aside.

_Hau._ Faith, much more than I believ'd, for he was very full of his new-fas.h.i.+on'd Spanish Civility, as they call it; But ha, ha, I hope, fair Mistress, you do not take after him?

_Euph._ What if I do, Sir?

_Hau._ Why then I had as lieve marry a Steeple with a perpetual Ring of Bells.

_Glo._ Let me advise you, Sir; methinks you might make a handsomer Speech for the first, to so pretty a Lady-- Fakes, and were I to do't--

_Hau._ I had a rare Speech for her thou knowest, and an Entertainment besides, that was, tho I say it, unordinary: But a pox of this new way of Civility, as thou call'st it, it has put me quite beside my part.

_Glo._ Tho you are out of your complimenting Part, I am not out of my dancing one, and therefore that part of your Entertainment I'll undertake for. 'Slife, Sir, would you disappoint all our s.h.i.+p's Company?--

_Hau._ That's according as I find this proud t.i.t in Humour.

_Car._ And why so coy? pray why all this Dissimulation? Come, come, I have told him your Mind, and do intend to make you both happy immediately.

_Euph._ How, Sir, immediately!

_Car._ Yes, indeed; nay, if you have deceiv'd me, and dissembled with me, when I was so kind, I'll show you Trick for Trick i'faith-- [Goes to _Haunce_.

_Euph._ What shall we do, _Olinda_?

_Olin._ Why marry Don _Alonzo_, Madam.

_Euph._ Do not rally, this is no time for Mirth.

_Olin._ Fie upon't, Madam, that you should have so little Courage; your Father takes this Fellow to be _Alonzo_.

_Car._ What Counsel are you giving there, hah?

_Olin._ Only taking leave of our old Acquaintance, since you talk of marrying us so soon.

_Car._ What Acquaintance, pray?

_Olin._ Our Maiden-heads, Sir.

_Hau._ Ha, ha, ha, a pleasant Wench, faith now; I believe you would be content to part with yours with less warning.

_Olin._ On easy Terms perhaps, but this marrying I do not like; 'tis like going a long Voyage to Sea, where after a while even the Calms are distasteful, and the Storms dangerous: one seldom sees a new Object, 'tis still a deal of Sea, Sea; Husband, Husband, every day,-- till one's quite cloy'd with it.

_Car._ A mad Girl this, Son.

_Hau._ Ay, Sir, but I wish she had left out the simile, it made my Stomach wamble.

_Glo._ Pray, Sir, let you the Maid alone as an Utensil belonging to my Place and Office, and meddle you with the Mistress.

_Hau._ Faith now, thou hast the better Bargain of the two; my Mistress looks so scurvily and civil, that I don't know what to say to her-- Lady-- hang't, that look has put me quite out again.

_Car._ To her, Son, to her--