A Match Made in Heaven Chapter 36

The General's expression was quite calm and he didn't look unusual.

Lord Meishan grabbed his heart and scratched his lungsChinese metaphor : become very upset¹ as he was so curious to know what was written in the paper ball! This was indeed the sorrow of an Immortal who loved to gossip…

Lu Qianqiao looked at the paper for a long time, then he suddenly folded it and slipped it inside the cloth on his chest.

“Thank you.”

He took out ten jars of wine from his Gankunanother universe²'s bag, threw them on the table, got up and left. Lord Meishan cried out in desperation, “Wait a minute! General! I…that...Little Mei, how has she been recently?“

Lu Qianqiao stopped and looked back at him without any expression.

Lord Meishan was so frightened but he still mustered all his courage as he explained, “I don't have any other meaning. I'm just merely being concerned about her, that's all…“

Even as an ordinary friend, he still had the position and confidence to greet her like this, right? He could, right? Right?

The General did not answer, but lowered his eyelids darkly and walked away in silence.

Was that supposed to be good or bad? Lord Meishan felt entangled. The little courage he had left was not enough to encourage him to chase after the General and to continue asking him. He had no other alternative but to turn around instead and embraced Little Crow that had stopped flying to drink some water. He smiled as he started to fawn on it, “My dear Little Crow, tell me, what was written on that paper ball?”

The little crow continued to glance at him with disdain, then it turned back and jumped onto the table. It pulled a piece of white paper over. When its claws shone with golden lights, it started to write like moving clouds and flowing waterChinese idiom : natural and spontaneous³.

Lord Meishan was just about to move closer to peek when he heard the soul spirits outside laughingly said, “Huh? It's Fox Fairy darent.i.tle of respect toward superiors⁴. You came just in time. That War Demon General just gifted ten jars of good wine.“

Lord Meishan rolled and crawled to get the small and exquisite ten jars of wine on the table into his arms as he snarled, “This wines are not many! I will absolutely never let anyone have a free drink!“

Zhen Hongsheng cheerfully pushed the door and came in, “You, Meishan, why are you always so stingy? When I've got good wine, I've always given you not any less.“

“I won't see you out. I really won't see you out.”

Although last time Liu Qianqiao had given him the recipe on how to make the wine, many of the ingredients in the recipe were ancient and had long since disappeared. Now that he had won the ten jars of wine with great ease, he had to keep a small mouth and slowly tasted all the wines by himself. 

Zhen Hongsheng was not angry either. He walked forward slowly and saw Little Crow writing on a piece of paper. It seemed to be writing about the War Demon Clan. He stated, "I just met the War Demon General. He looked quite ferocious."

Moreover, his eyes…indeed as expected, had been predicted by the Great Monk. The two, mother and son, were really not so simple people.

Lord Meishan picked up that piece of paper, took a rough look and immediately froze.

Zhen Hongsheng s.h.i.+fted his sight, “By the way, speaking of which, isn't Xin Mei the General's wife? I think there is something wrong with the General. With this transformation, what do you think the Imperial Mausoleum look like right now? And Meishan, you seem to like that girl very much, right?“

Before he even finished speaking, Lord Meishan had already left the wine jars behind and rushed out while shouting angrily, “Hurry! Bring me Little Crane! I'm going out!“

Zhen Hongsheng leaned over the window and added, “Hurry up! I have seen the girl's palm, and she's rather unlucky recently. If you are late, she may have lose her life…“

Lord Meishan jumped onto the back of Little Crane and flew away without even looking back. Zhen Hongsheng got what he wanted and opened a jar of wine that was used to wors.h.i.+p G.o.ds in heaven. He mumbled, he will still be very stingy later. However, who cares, weren't these wines not belong to him? He slowly poured the wine into a cup. Its colour was crystal clear as he carefully read a book.

“Such a good wine, Meishan. I'm not going to leave any for you.”

*

Lu Qianqiao never returned to the Imperial Mausoleum. Silan was still injured and he had been lying on the bed for days, while shedding tears like a dissatisfied housewife. When he opened his mouth, it always muttered only these words, “General…why are you…”

At first, Lord Zhao would try to appease him, but now he had turned a blind eye and a deaf ear to him. That day, Xin Mei came to deliver Jin Chuanglit golden wound⁵ medicine. Just as she opened the door, she heard Silan playing the same old tune again, “General! How can you be so cruel! Why? Why?!”

Lord Zhao was leaning over the table to write about the last part of the ‘Unhappy Couple Made In Heaven'. He just had a headache because Silan was being so noisy that he could not help but bemoan, “Look at you! Such a big and tall man, with strong round waist! You are a man! Not an abandoned heroine in a play! That's enough. Now close your mouth for me!“

Silan covered his head with a white towel, as he closed his eyes and wept silently.

......How should Xin Mei put it, she, who was the real heroine, suddenly felt a very heavy burden on herself.

“Girl, what medicine are you still giving to him?” When Lord Zhao saw her, he continued to say, “This guy is a monster. No matter how many broken ribs he has, he will get better after two or three days. He doesn't need any medicine at all.”

Silan could not help opened his eyes, “Old Zhao, I am suffering from a heart injury!”

“So laozimean 'I' but used arrogantly or jocularly⁶ has been forced to sit here and listen to all your nagging! As to save you from first crying, then make a fuss and then hang yourselfto throw a tantrum⁷!“ Lord Zhao threw the brush away and denounced it loudly, “I'm currently writing the play book which is at its crucial part. Because of your noise, I am completely uninspired to write!”

“It's all because you, old fool, wrote that damaging bad luck play book! Now the General has walked away from here!”

“You're just talking nonsense!”

“You…”

The two monsters were awfully noisy that Xin Mei looked at this one first and then looked at the other one next. She wondered if she should comfort them. There was a pot of tea on the table. She was planning to have some tea to continue watching the excitement when she suddenly heard a few monsters outside the door shouting, “Silan! Don't pretend to be ill. Hurry come out! Outside the Imperial Mausoleum, there was an Immortal trapped in the Mist Formation. He is cursing loudly!”

When Silan heard what had been said, he immediately got up and threw the white towel on his head into the water. He casually put on a coat in smooth agile movement. Nowhere could be seen any injury on him.

Although the General had wounded him, he would never betray him as long as he lived. Since the General was not in the Imperial Mausoleum, he vowed to die for him to keep this paradise!

Everyone immediately rushed to Mist Formation and heard a loud roar from afar, “Lu Qianqiao! If you, if you dare to kill Xiao Mei, I, Mei Shan, will go up to heaven or down to h.e.l.lChinese idiom : to go to great lengths⁸ to never let you off!“

Xin Mei walked over and looked up at Little Crane that was flying in mid-air, with its demeanour of a transcendent being, She asked curiously, “Lord Meishan, what are you doing?”

When Lord Meishan saw her still fully intact and appeared charming in front of his eyes, he felt so excited just like a child. He rolled down from the back of the crane, and fell down straight in front of her, with two lines of tears streamed down his face.

“Little Mei! Fortunately, you are all right!“

He was excited. He wailed as he was pleasantly surprised, which also perked up his manliness. He grabbed her by the sleeve and started to leave, “You should come with me at once! Let's run away! You can't stay at this place!“

One was pulling — one was unmoved.

One continued to pull hard — one continued to be unmoved.

Meishan's face turned red as he pulled with all his strength, only to hear Xin Mei strangely said, “What are you pulling Silan for?”

He turned in astonishment and saw himself holding a very ugly-looking big man. The big man looked at him quietly with his deep eyes and asked, “Immortal Meishan, are you going to elope with me?”

……

When Lord Meishan finally calmed down, it was already a long time after the incident, during which, Xin Mei sat on the ground with a group of small monsters, drank a cup of tea, ate two pieces of PaG.o.da tree flower flat cakes and belched contentedly.

“It sounds like you know what happened to the General.” Silan handed him a cup of tea to help him smoothed the air.

Lord Meishan's facial expression was empty and ethereal, while his voice was like a lost rabbit as he answered, “It was just transformation, killing and so on…”

What the h.e.l.l does that even mean?

“Probably the mother killed the father, and now the son wants to kill his wife or something…”

“Please say it again, slowly and smoothly, in the words of a normal person.”

……He was not normal now — no, he would not even be normal in the future! Lord Meishan shed two lines of tears of anguish mixed with ashamed.

“Oh? It's so lively, and I've come at a good time.”

A frivolous but gentle voice suddenly sounded on the top of their head. When they looked up, they saw several huge birds of paradise came out from the clouds while pulling a long vehicle with an extraordinary style. A young man in a large black suit squatted at the front of the vehicle and with a smile, he waved at them.

Who was this person? He was annoyingly ostentatious.

Xin Mei was nibbling a PaG.o.da tree flower flat cake when she said, “That is…that fox clan…fake monk!”

“I'm a real monk, not a fake monk.”

The Great Monk jumped out of the vehicle while sighing and landed right across from her. He grabbed a piece of PaG.o.da tree flower flat cake and stuffed it into his mouth. He murmured, “I've been starving for two days.”

“You are from the Fox Clan!” Lord Meishan dejected eyes finally got a little bit of spirit at that moment as he looked at him suspiciously.

He had been very interested in these ancient descendants for a period of time, and he had asked Little Crow to check a lot of things about them, such as the War Demon Clan in the far west, the Fox Clan in the south, the Imperial Sons Clan in the north, etc. These clans of ancient descendants did not have much contact with each other, and there was even a contradiction between the two clans, the Fox Clan and the War Demon Clan. One said that they were from the deity lineage while the other firmly denied this statement, which was quite a rare situation.

Compared with today's declining War Demons, this ethnic group was much stronger. Many countries in the south still built temples for them and wors.h.i.+pped them as true G.o.ds. The so-called great monks were different from ordinary people. They were said to have a very n.o.ble status and were extremely clean and pure.

At present, this black-coated man…with nothing  that could be considered special and forgetful face was eating a Pandora tree flower flat cake and his mouth was full of crumbs. Where did he look clean and n.o.ble? Was what had been told actually a lie?

“You are really worthy of your reputation. You really love to gossip a lot.” The Great Monk smiled at him. “Unfortunately, you still not elegant enough. Learn from me. If you want to ask a woman to come with you, you can't just shed tears.”

He stuffed the last Pandora tree flower flat cake into his mouth, clapped his hands, and under everyone's eyes, he slapped at a spot beside a dazed Xin Mei — uh, he had slapped an empty s.p.a.ce. That girl's reaction was too fast as she had immediately hidden herself away. (Meishan roared : How can this be called elegance?!)

“What are you doing? !” Xin Mei jumped up with a swish, while considering whether to punch or kick him back.

Silan stood directly in front of her and glared at him. “I know there is a Fox Clan member around! Did you have a disagreement with the General? Are you trying to sneak in while he isn't around?!”

The Great Monk smiled lightly, “If he was here, do you people thought that you could still be alive?”

Silan was stunned.

“Excuse me, please don't disturb me while I'm trying to save people.”

His hand, which was wearing a black silk glove, kindly patted Silan on the shoulder. Somehow, Silan felt that he was completely unable to resist it and he involuntarily took a step back, letting the Great Monk put his claws into Xin Mei.

— his hand clutched into empty air again. This girl was really slippery. She immediately hid behind a tree, like a small alert animal.

“Darling, come here.” The Great Monk squatted on the ground and hooked his fingers at her like she was a cat. “GegeElder Brother⁹ will give you some delicious food.”

A pebble flew straight at him, and he quickly flashed, only to hear a ‘kacha' sound. The relatively thick little PaG.o.da tree behind him was smashed down abruptly.

The Great Monk wiped the cold sweat from his forehead : War Demon General, you have worked really hard.

At last, Lord Meishan, who could not sit down, had perked up his manliness again and was about to stop the Great Monk when he stepped forward. However, he heard him say with a smile, “It's too late. Li Chaoyang is very well informed. I can't help it. I have to do something else.“

He whistled, and several birds of paradise with the long vehicle immediately cried loudly. At that moment, the golden light from the vehicle was so bright that nothing could be seen. The crowd instinctively covered their eyes and squatted down. After a while, they could hear the frivolous voice of the Great Monk again on top of their heads, “You should run too, if you don't want to die.”

Lord Meishan abruptly opened his eyes, which were stung by strong light and he nearly shed tears. While he was still in a trance, he could vaguely see Xin Mei fainted in the man's arms and being carried on the vehicle.

However, in the blink of an eye, with a strong bright light, all the birds of paradise and the long vehicle disappeared together with Xin Mei.

Xin Mei has been kidnapped! Will LQQ come and save her?

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