The Funny Philosophers Part 69

"Look!--look yonder!"

On the opposite side of the street they beheld what appeared to be a procession of giants and dwarfs. In front walked Cleopatra with little Love on her arm. Next followed Theodosia with Dove, who looked like a pigmy by her side. After them came Sophonisba with Bliss; and in the rear was Hercules with a very pretty but unusually diminutive woman. The giant could not stoop to give her his arm, but led her by the hand. The procession pa.s.sed on, and entered the house of Gideon Foot.

"Who in the world was that little woman?" asked Tom.

"His wife," said Toney.

"Is Hercules married?"

"He was married about a week ago to his little cousin Polly Sampson. He bought a farm adjoining that of Moses, whose father is dead. Hercules lives out there with his little wife, and has, I suppose, brought her into town on a visit to his relations."

"And what has become of Moses?" asked Tom.

"Moses is also married."

"He is?" exclaimed Tom, in astonishment.

"Yes; he is married notwithstanding his dread of the female s.e.x."

"How did it ever happen?"

"By the death of his father, Moses became a landed proprietor, and is the owner of a fine farm in a high state of cultivation. Several enterprising young maidens endeavored to make an impression on his heart; but he could not be induced to go into their society until, on a certain occasion, there was a rural festival in the neighborhood, called an apple-b.u.t.ter boiling."

"Did Moses go to that?"

"He would not have gone had not some waggish young farmers first put him in an abnormal condition, by the consumption of a considerable quant.i.ty of hard cider. The cider imparted a wonderful degree of courage, and Moses went to the festival, where he soon found himself surrounded by rustic beauties. Moses drank more cider and became more courageous.

Finally, as he sat in a corner with a pretty maiden, he popped the question."

"He did?"

"The young maiden said 'Yes' with a sweet smile, and looked so pretty that Moses kissed her."

"Great thunder!" cried Tom.

"When Moses got sober he was greatly alarmed; but it was too late to recede. More than twenty people had heard his promise of marriage. The young woman's father threatened to have a suit brought for breach of promise; and her big brother said that he would cudgel the swain if he proved false to his engagement. So Moses, dreadfully frightened, was led like a lamb to the altar, and now has a very pretty wife, and looks contented and happy."

Toney purchased the property for his friend, and in a few weeks the Professor and Dora arrived with the intention of making it their permanent home. Tom became the owner of an adjoining estate. The three friends, with their wives, frequently a.s.sembled in the parlor of the Widow Wild, with whom Toney and Rosabel continued to reside after their marriage. Not long subsequent to the arrival of the Professor and Dora, Clarence and Harry, with Claribel and Imogen, came to Mapleton on a visit. During the conversation of the evening, Tom asked Toney if he still adhered to the opinion which he once so emphatically expressed as they sat on the veranda of the hotel in Bella Vista.

"What was that?" asked Toney.

"That the right man is never married to the right woman."

"No; I do not," said Toney, with emphasis. And he looked at Rosabel.

"There must be a recantation of such opinions when experience has demonstrated their fallacy," said the Professor, with a look of tender affection at Dora. Each husband looked at his wife, and each wife returned the glance; and it was evident that the ladies and gentlemen present were unanimously of opinion that the right men had been married to the right women.

"And what has become of the Mystic Order of Seven Sweethearts?" asked Tom.

"The organization has been destroyed by a power which man has never been able to resist," said Toney.

"What is that?" asked Rosabel.

"Love," said her husband.

"_Amor vincit omnia_," said the Professor, as he arose from his seat; and, bidding his friends good-night, conducted Dora to their carriage.

As they rode homeward, Dora inquired the meaning of those Latin words, and they were translated by her husband; and she now learned that even the stern old Romans recognized and acknowledged the

OMNIPOTENCE OF LOVE.

THE END.