Short Stories by Robert A. Heinlein Vol 2 Part 155

Nothing just yet. Go home and sleep on it. This Charlie may be playing a lone hand, making small-time shakedowns purely on bluff. I don't really think so; his type sounds like a mobster. But we need more data; we can't do anything until they expose their hand a little more.'

We did not have long to wait. When I got down to my place of business the next morning I found a surprise waiting for me - several of them, all unpleasant.

It was as if it had been ransacked by burglars, set fire to, then gutted by a flood. I called up Jedson at once. He came right over. He didn't have anything to say at first, but went poking through the ruins, examining a number of things. He stopped at the point where the hardware storeroom had stood, reached down and gathered up a handful of the wet ashes and muck. Notice anything?' he asked, working his fingers so that the debris sloughed off and left in his hand some small metal objects - nails, screws, and the like.

Nothing in particular. This is where the hardware bins were located; that's some of the stuff that didn't burn.'

Yes, I know,' he said impatiently, but don't you see anything else? Didn't you stock a lot of bra.s.s fittings?'

Yes.'

Well, find one!'

I poked around with my toe in a spot where there should have been a lot of bra.s.s hinges and drawer pulls mixed in with the ashes. I did not find anything but the nails that had held the bins together. I oriented myself by such landmarks as I could find, and tried again. There were plenty of nuts and bolts, cas.e.m.e.nt hooks, and similar junk, but no bra.s.s.

Jedson watched me with a sardonic grin on his face.

Well?' I said, somewhat annoyed at his manner.

Don't you see?' he answered. It's magic, all right. In this entire yard there is not one sc.r.a.p of metal left, except cold iron!'

It was plain enough. I should have seen it myself.

He messed around awhile longer. Presently we came across an odd thing. It was a slimy, wet track that meandered through my property, and disappeared down one of the drains. It looked as if a giant slug, about the size of a Crosley car, had wandered through the place.

Undine,' Jedson announced, and wrinklcd his nose at the smell. I once saw a movie, a Megapix super production called the Water King's Daughter. According to it undines were luscious enough to have interested Earl Carroll, but if they left trails like that I wanted none of them.

He took out his handkerchief and spread it for a clean place to sit down on what had been sacks of cement - a fancy, quick- setting variety, with a trade name of

Hydrolith. I had been getting eighty cents a sack for the stuff; now it was just so many big boulders.

He ticked the situation off on his fingers. Archie, you've been kicked in the teeth by at least three of the four different types of elementals - earth, fire, and water. Maybe there was a sylph of the air in on it, too, but I can't prove it. First the gnomes came and cleaned out everything you had that came out of the ground, except cold iron. A salamander followed them and set fire to the place, burning everything that was burnable, and scorching and smoke-damaging the rest. Then the undine turned the place into a d.a.m.ned swamp, ruining anything that wouldn't burn, like cement and lime. You're insured?'

Naturally.' But then I starred to think. I carried the usual fire, theft, and flood insurance, but business-risk insurance comes pretty high; I was not covered against the business I would lose in the meantime, nor did I have any way to complete current contracts. It was going to cost me quite a lot to cover those contracts; if I let them slide it would ruin the good will of my business, and lay me open to suits for damage.

The situation was worse than I had thought, and looked worse still the more I thought about it. Naturally I could not accept any new business until the mess was cleaned up, the place rebuilt, and new stock put in. Luckily most of my papers were in a fireproof steel safe; but not all, by any means. There would be accounts receivable that I would never collect because I had nothing to show for them. I work on a slim margin of profit, with all of my capital at work. It began to look as if the firm of Archibald Fraser, Merchant and Contractor, would go into involuntary bankruptcy.

I explained the situation to Jedson.

Don't get your wind up too fast,' he rea.s.sured me. What magic can do, magic can undo. What we need is the best wizard in town.'

Who's going to pay the fee?' I objected. Those boys don't work for nickels, and

I'm cleaned out.'

Take it easy, son,' he advised, the insurance outfit that carries your risks is due to take a bigger loss than you are. If we can show them a way to save money on this, we can do business. Who represents them here?'

I told him - a firm of lawyers downtown in the Professional Building.

I got hold of my office girl and told her to telephone such of our customers as were due for deliveries that day. She was to stall where possible and pa.s.s on the business that could not wait to a firm that I had exchanged favours with in the past. I sent the rest of my help home - they had been standing around since eight o'clock, making useless remarks and getting in the way - and told them not to come back until I sent for them. Luckily it was Sat.u.r.day; we had the best part of forty- eight hours to figure out some answer.

We flagged a magic carpet that was cruising past and headed for the Professional

Building. I settled back and determined to enjoy the ride and forget my troubles. I like taxicabs - they give me a feeling of luxury - and I've liked them even better since they took the wheels off them. This happened to be one of the new Cadillacs with the teardrop shape and air cus.h.i.+ons. We went scooting down the boulevard, silent as thought, not six inches off the ground.

Perhaps I should explain that we have a local city ordinance against apportation unless it conforms to traffic regulations - ground traffic, I mean, not air.

That may surprise you, but it came about as a result of a mishap to a man in my own line of business. He had an order for eleven-odd tonsof gla.s.s brick to be delivered to a restaurant being remodelled on the other side of town from his yard. He employed a magician with a common carrier's licence to deliver for him.

I don't know whether he was careless or just plain stupid, but he dropped those eleven tons of brick through the roof of the Prospect Boulevard Baptist Church.

Anybody knows that magic won't work over consecrated ground; if he had consulted a map he would have seen that the straight-line route took his load over the church. Anyhow, the janitor was killed, and it might just as well have been the whole congregation. It caused such a commotion that apportation was limited to the streets, near the ground.

It's people like that who make it inconvenient for everybody else.

Our man was in - Mr Wiggin, of the firm of Wiggin, Snead, McClatchey & Wiggin.

He had already heard about my fire', but when Jedson explained his conviction that magic was at the bottom of it he baulked. It was, he said, most irregular.

Jedson was remarkably patient.

Are you an expert in magic, Mr Wiggin?' he asked.

I have not specialized in thaumaturgic jurisprudence, if that is what you mean, sir.'

Well, I don't hold a licence myself, but it has been my hobby for a good many years. I'm sure of what I say in this case; you can call in all the independent experts you wish - they'll confirm my opinion. Now suppose we stipulate, for the sake of argument, that this damage was caused by magic. If that is true, there is a possibility that we may be able to save much of the loss. You have authority to settle claims, do you not?'

Well, I think I may say yes to that - bearing in mind the legal restrictions and the terms of the contract.' I don't believe he would have conceded that he had five fingers on his right hand without an auditor to back him up.

Then it is your business to hold your company's losses down to a minimum. If I find a wizard who can undo a part, or all, of the damage, will you guarantee the fee, on behalf of your company, up to a reasonable amount, say twenty-five per cent of the indemnity?'

He hemmed and hawed some more, and said he did not see how he could possibly do it, and that if the fire had been magic, then to restore by magic might be compounding a felony, as we could not be sure what the connexions of the magicians involved might be in the Half World. Besides that, my claim had not been allowed as yet; I had failed to notify the company of my visitor of the day before, which possibly might prejudice my claim. In any case, it was a very serious precedent to set; he must consult the home office.

Jedson stood up. I can see that we are simply wasting each other's time, Mr

Wiggin. Your contention about Mr Fraser's possible responsibility is ridiculous, and you know it. There is no reason under the contract to notify you, and even if there were, he is within the twenty-four hours allowed for any notification.

I think it best that we consult the home office ourselves.' He reached for his hat.

Wiggin put up his hand. Gentlemen, gentlemen, please! Let's not be hasty. Will

Mr Fraser agree to pay half of the fee?'

No. Why should he? It's your loss, not his. You insured him.

Wiggin tapped his teeth with his spectacles, then said, We must make the fee contingent on results.'

Did you ever hear of anyone in his right mind dealing with a wizard on any other basis?'