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Of course, both Redwood and old Ike had met with more than one "bar sc.r.a.pe," and the latter was induced to relate one of his best.
"Strengers," began he, "when you scare up a grizzly, take my advice, and gie 'im a wide berth--that is, unless yur unkimmun well mounted. Ov coorse, ef yur critter kin be depended upon, an' thur's no brush to 'tangle him, yur safe enuf; as no grizzly, as ever I seed, kin catch up wi' a hoss, whur the ground's open an' clur. F'r all that, whur the timmer's clost an' brushy, an' the ground o' that sort whur a hoss mout stummel, it are allers the safest plan to let ole Eph'm slide. I've seed a grizzly pull down as good a hoss as ever tracked a parairy, whur the critter hed got bothered in a thicket. The fellur that straddled him only saved himself by hookin' on to the limb o' a tree. 'Twant two minnits afore this child kim up--hearin' the rumpus. I hed good sight o' the bar, an' sent a bullet--sixty to the pound--into the varmint's brain-pan, when he immediately cawalloped over. But 'twur too late to save the hoss. He wur rubbed out. The bar had half skinned him, an'
wur tarrin' at his guts! Wagh!"
Here the trapper unsheathed his clasp-knife, and having cut a "chunk"
from a plug of real "Jeemes's River," stuck it into his cheek, and proceeded with his narration.
"I reck'n, I've seed a putty consid'able o' the grizzly bar in my time.
Ef them thur chaps who writes about all sorts o' varmint hed seed as much o' the grizzly as I hev, they mout a gin a hul book consarnin' the critter. Ef I hed a plug o' bacca for every grizzly I've rubbed out, it 'ud keep my jaws waggin' for a good twel'month, I reck'n. Ye-es, strengers, I've done some bar-killin'--I hev that, an' no mistake!
Hain't I, Mark?
"Wal, I wur a-gwine to tell you ov a sarc.u.mstance that happened to this child about two yeern ago. It wur upon the Platte, atween Chimbly Rock an' Laramies'.
"I wur engaged as hunter an' guide to a carryvan o' emigrant folks that wur on thur way to Oregon.
"Ov coorse I allers kept ahead o' the carryvan, an' picked the place for thur camp.
"Wal, one arternoon I hed halted whur I seed some timmer, which ur a scace article about Chimbly Rock. This, thort I, 'll do for campin'-ground; so I got down, pulled the saddle off o' my ole mar, an'
staked the critter upon the best patch o' gra.s.s that wur near, intendin'
she shed hev her gut-full afore the camp cattle kim up to bother her.
"I hed shot a black-tail buck, an' after kindlin' a fire, I roasted a griskin' o' him, an' ate it.
"Still thur wan't no sign o' the carryvan, an' arter hangin' the buck out o' reach o' the wolves, I tuk up my rifle, an' set out to rackynoiter the neighbourhood.
"My mar bein' some'at jaded, I let her graze away, an' went afoot; an'
that, let me tell you, strengers, ar about the foolichest thing you kin do upon a parairy. I wan't long afore I proved it; but I'll k.u.m to that by 'm by.
"Wal, I fust clomb a conside'able hill, that gin me a view beyont. Thur war a good-sized parairy layin' torst the south an' west. Thur wur no trees 'ceptin' an odd cotton-wood hyur an' thur on the hillside.
"About a mile off I seed a flock of goats--what you'd call antelopes, though goats they ur, as sure as goats is goats.
"Thur waunt no kiver near them--not a stick, for the parairy wur as bar as yur hand; so I seed, at a glimp, it 'ud be no use a tryin' to approach, unless I tuk some plan to decoy the critters.
"I soon thort o' a dodge, an' went back to camp for my blanket, which wur a red Mackinaw. This I knew 'ud be the very thing to fool the goats with, an' I set out torst them.
"For the fust half-a-mile or so, I carried the blanket under my arm.
Then I spread it out, an' walked behind it until I wur 'ithin three or four hundred yards o' the animals. I kept my eye on 'em through a hole in the blanket. They wur a-growin' scary, an' hed begun to run about in circles; so when I seed this, I knew it wur time to stop.
"Wal, I hunkered down, an' still keepin' the blanket spread out afore me, I hung it upon a saplin' that I had brought from the camp. I then stuck the saplin' upright in the ground; an' mind ye, it wan't so easy to do that, for the parairy wur hard friz, an' I hed to dig a hole wi'
my knife. Howsomdever, I got the thing rigged at last, an' the blanket hangin' up in front kivered my karkidge most complete. I hed nothin'
more to do but wait till the goats shed come 'ithin range o' my shootin'-iron.
"Wal, that wan't long. As ye all know, them goats is a mighty curious animal--as curious as weemen is--an arter runnin' backward an' forrard a bit, an' tossin' up thur heads, an' sniffin' the air, one o' the fattest, a young p.r.o.ng-horn buck, trotted up 'ithin fifty yards o' me.
"I jest squinted through the sights, an' afore that goat hed time to wink twice, I hit him plum atween the eyes. Ov coorse he wur throwed in his tracks.
"Now, you'd a-jumped up, an' frightened the rest away--that's what you'd a done, strengers. But you see I knowd better. I knowd that so long's the critters didn't see my karkidge, they wan't a-gwine to mind the crack o' the gun. So I laid still, in behopes to git a wheen more o'
them.
"As I hed calc'lated at fust, they didn't run away, an' I slipped in my charge as brisk as possible. But jest as I wur raisin' to take sight on a doe that hed got near enough, the hull gang tuk scare, an' broke off as ef a pack of parairy-wolves wur arter 'em.
"I wur clean puzzled at this, for I knowd I hedn't done anythin' to frighten 'em, but I wan't long afore I diskivered the pause o' thur alarm. Jest then I heerd a snift, like the coughin' o' a glandered hoss; an' turnin' suddintly round, I spied the biggest bar it hed ever been my luck to set eyes on. He wur comin' direct torst me, an' at that minnit wan't over twenty yards from whur I lay. I knowd at a glimp he wur a grizzly!
"'Tain't no use to say I wan't skeart; I wur skeart, an' mighty bad skeart, I tell ye.
"At fust, I thort o' jumpin' to my feet, an' makin' tracks; but a minnit o' reflexshun showed me that 'ud be o' little use. Thur wur a half o'
mile o' clur parairy on every side o' me, an' I knowd the grizzly laid catch up afore I hed made three hundred yards in any direction. I knowd, too, that ef I started, the varmint 'ud be sartin to foller. It wur plain to see the bar meant mischief; I kud tell that from the glint o' his eyes.
"Thur wan't no time to lose in thinkin' about it. The brute wur still comin' nearer; but I noticed that he wur a-gwine slower an' slower, every now an' agin risin' to his hind-feet, clawin' his nose, an'
sniffin' the air.
"I seed that it wur the red blanket that puzzled him; an' seein' this, I crep' closter behint it, an' cached as much o' my karkidge as it 'ud kiver.
"When the bar hed got 'ithin about ten yards o' the spot, he kim to a full stop, an' reared up as he hed did several times, with his belly full torst me. The sight wur too much for this niggur, who never afore had been bullied by eyther Injun or bar.
"'Twur a beautiful shot, an' I kudn't help tryin' it, ef 't hed been my last; so I poked my rifle through the hole in the blanket, an' sent a bullet atween the varmint's ribs.
"That wur, perhaps, the foolichest an' wust shot this child ever made.
Hed I not fired it, the bar mout a gone off, feard o' the blanket; but I did fire, an' my narves bein' excited, I made a bad shot.
"I had ta'en sight for the heart, an' I only hit the varmint's shoulder.
"Ov coorse, the bar bein' now wounded, bekim savage, and cared no longer for the blanket. He roared out like a bull, tore at the place whur I hed hit him, an' then kim on as fast as his four legs 'ud carry him.
"Things looked squally. I throwed away my emp'y gun, an' drawed my bowie, expectin' nothin' else than a regular stand-up tussle wi' the bar. I knowd it wur no use turnin' tail now; so I braced myself up for a desp'rate fight.
"But jest as the bar hed got 'ithin ten feet o' me, an idee suddintly kim into my head. I hed been to Santa Fe, among them yaller-hided Mexikins, whur I hed seed two or three bull-fights. I hed seed them mattydoors fling thur red cloaks over a bull's head, jest when you'd a thort they wur a-gwine to be gored to pieces on the fierce critter's horns.
"Jest then, I remembered thur trick; an' afore the bar cud close on me, I grabbed the blanket, spreadin' it out as I tuk holt.
"Strangers, that wur a blanket an' no mistake! It wur as fine a five-point Mackinaw as ever kivered the hump-ribs o' a nor'-west trader.
I used to wear it Mexikin-fashun when it rained; an' in coorse, for that purpose, thur wur a hole in the middle to pa.s.s the head through.
"Wal, jest as the bar sprung at me, I flopped the blanket straight in his face. I seed his snout a pa.s.sin' through the hole, but I seed no more; for I feeled the critter's claws touchin' me, an' I let go.
"Now, thunk I, wur my time for a run. The blanket mout blin' him a leetle, an' I mout git some start.
"With this thort, I glid past the animal's rump, an' struck out over the parairy.
"The direction happened to be that that led torst the camp, half a mile off; but thur wur a tree nearer, on the side o' the hill. Ef I kud reach that, I knowd I 'ud be safe enuf, as the grizzly bar it don't climb.
"For the fust hundred yards I never looked round; then I only squinted back, runnin' all the while.
"I kud jest see that the bar appeared to be still a tossin' the blanket, and not fur from whur we hed parted k.u.mpny.
"I thort this some'at odd; but I didn't stay to see what it meant till I hed put another hundred yards atween us. Then I half turned, an' tuk a good look; an' if you believe me, strangers, the sight I seed thur 'ud a made a Mormon larf. Although jest one minnit afore, I wur putty nigh skeart out o' my seven senses, that sight made me larf till I wur like to bring on a colic.