Mr. Sponge's Sporting Tour Part 89

Sponge got, and what would he do?' This Lucy couldn't tell. 'What! hadn't he told her where is estates were?--'No.' 'Well, was his dad dead?' This Lucy didn't know either. They had got no further than the tender prop. 'Ah!

well; would get it all out of him by degrees.' And with the reiteration of her 'so glads,' and the repayment of the kiss Lucy had advanced, her ladys.h.i.+p advised her to get off her habit and make herself comfortable while she ran downstairs to communicate the astonis.h.i.+ng intelligence to the party below.

'What d'ye think?' exclaimed she, bursting into the billiard-room, where the party were still engaged in a game at pool, all our sportsmen, except Captain Cut.i.tfat, who still sported his new Moses and Son's scarlet, having divested themselves of their hunting-gear--'What d'ye think?' exclaimed she, darting into the middle of them.

'That Bob don't cannon?' observed Captain Bouncey from below the bandage that encircled his broken head, nodding towards Bob Spangles, who was just going to make a stroke.

'That Wax is out of limbo?' suggested Captain Seedeybuck, in the same breath.

'No. Guess again!' exclaimed Lady Scattercash, rubbing her hands in high glee.

'That the Pope's got a son?' observed Captain Quod.

'No. Guess again!' exclaimed her ladys.h.i.+p, laughing.

'I give it up,' replied Captain Bouncey.

'So do I,' added Captain Seedeybuck.

'_That Mr. Sponge is going to be married_,' enunciated her ladys.h.i.+p, slowly and emphatically, waving her arms.

'Ho-o-ray! Only think of that!' exclaimed Captain Quod. 'Old 'hogany-tops goin' to be spliced!'

'Did you ever?' asked Bob Spangles.

'No, I _never_,' replied Captain Bouncey.

'He should be called Spooney Sponge, not Soapey Sponge,' observed Captain Seedeybuck.

'Well, but to whom?' asked Captain Bouncey.

'Ah, to whom indeed! That's the question,' rejoined her ladys.h.i.+p archly.

'I know,' observed Bob Spangles.

'No, you don't.'

'Yes, I do.'

'Who is it, then?' demanded her ladys.h.i.+p.

'Lucy Glitters, to be sure,' replied Bob, who hadn't had his stare out of the billiard-room window for nothing.

'Pity her,' observed Bouncey, sprawling along the billiard-table to play for a cannon.

'Why?' asked Lady Scattercash.

'Reg'lar scamp,' replied Bouncey, vexed at missing his stroke.

'Dare say you know nothing about him,' snapped her ladys.h.i.+p.

'Don't I?' replied Bouncey complacently; adding, 'that's all you know.'

'He'll whop her, to a certainty,' observed Seedeybuck.

'What makes you think that?' asked her ladys.h.i.+p.

'Oh--ha--hem--haw--why, because he whopped his poor horse--whopped him over the ears. Whop his horse, whop his wife; whop his wife, whop his horse.

Reg'lar Rule-of-three sum.'

'Make her a bad husband, I dare say,' observed Bob Spangles, who was rather smitten with Lucy himself.

'Never mind; a bad husband's a deal better than none, Bob,' replied Lady Scattercash, determined not to be put out of conceit of her man.

'He, he, he!--haw, haw, haw!--ho, ho, ho! Well done you!' laughed several.

'She'll have to keep him,' observed Captain Cut.i.tfat, whose turn it now was to play.

'What makes you think that?' asked Lady Scattercash, coming again to the charge.

'He has nothing,' replied Fat coolly.

"Deed, but he has--a very good property, too,' replied her ladys.h.i.+p.

'In _Air_s.h.i.+re, I should think,' rejoined Fat.

'No, in Englands.h.i.+re,' retorted her ladys.h.i.+p: 'and great expectations from an uncle,' added she.

'Ah--he looks like a man to be on good terms with his uncle,' sneered Captain Bouncey.

'Make no doubt he pays him many a visit,' observed Seedeybuck.

'Indeed! that's all you know,' snapped Lady Scattercash.

'It's not all I know,' replied Seedeybuck.

'Well, then, what else do you know?' asked she.

'I know he has nothing,' replied Seedey.

'How do you know it?'

'I _know_,' said Seedey, with an emphasis, now settling to his stroke.

'Well, never mind,' retorted her ladys.h.i.+p; 'if he has nothing, she has nothing, and nothing can be nicer.'

So saying, she hurried out of the room.