The Three Clerks Part 51

'My mamma is never displeased because we amuse ourselves, and I am not a bit fatigued;' and so saying Katie walked off, and took refuge with her sister Gertrude. What business had any Ugolina Neverbend to interfere between her and her mamma?

Then came the supper. There was a great rush to get downstairs, but Charley was so clever that even this did not put him out. Of course there was no sitting down; which means that the bashful, retiring, and obedient guests were to stand on their legs; while those who were forward, and impudent, and disobedient, found seats for themselves wherever they could. Charley was certainly among the latter cla.s.s, and he did not rest therefore till he had got Katie into an old arm-chair in one corner of the room, in such a position as to enable himself to eat his own supper leaning against the chimney-piece.

'I say, Johnson,' said he, 'do bring me some ham and chicken--it's for a lady--I'm wedged up here and can't get out--and, Johnson, some sherry.'

The good-natured young Weights obeyed, and brought the desired provisions.

'And Johnson--upon my word I'm sorry to be so troublesome--but one more plateful if you please--for another lady--a good deal, if you please, for this lady, for she's very hungry; and some more sherry.'

Johnson again obeyed--the Weights are always obedient--and Charley of course appropriated the second portion to his own purposes.

'Oh, Charley, that was a fib--now wasn't it? You shouldn't have said it was for a lady.'

'But then I shouldn't have got it.'

'Oh, but that's no reason; according to that everybody might tell a fib whenever they wanted anything.'

'Well, everybody does--everybody except you, Katie.'

'O no,' said Katie--'no they don't--mamma, and Linda, and Gertrude never do; nor Harry Norman, he never does, nor Alaric.'

'No, Harry Norman never does,' said Charley, with something like vexation in his tone. He made no exception to Katie's list of truth-tellers, but he was thinking within himself whether Alaric had a juster right to be in the catalogue than himself. 'Harry Norman never does, certainly. You must not compare me with them, Katie. They are patterns of excellence. I am all the other way, as everybody knows.' He was half laughing as he spoke, but Katie's sharp ear knew that he was more than half in earnest, and she felt she had pained him by what she had said.

'Oh, Charley, I didn't mean that; indeed I did not. I know that in all serious things you are as truthful as they are--and quite as good--that is, in many ways.' Poor Katie! she wanted to console him, she wanted to be kind, and yet she could not be dishonest.

'Quite as good! no, you know I am not.'

'You are as good-hearted, if not better; and you will be as steady, won't you, Charley? I am sure you will; and I know you are more clever, really more clever than either of them.'

'Oh! Katie.'

'I am quite sure you are. I have always said so; don't be angry with me for what I said.'

'Angry with you! I couldn't be angry with you.'

'I wouldn't, for the world, say anything to vex you. I like you better than either of them, though Alaric is my brother-in-law.

Of course I do; how could I help it, when you saved my life?'

'Saved your life! Pooh! I didn't save your life. Any boy could have done the same, or any waterman about the place. When you fell in, the person who was nearest you pulled you out, that was all.'

There was something almost approaching to ferocity in his voice as he said this; and yet when Katie timidly looked up she saw that he had turned his back to the room, and that his eyes were full of tears. He had felt that he was loved by this child, but that he was loved from a feeling of uncalled-for grat.i.tude. He could not stop to a.n.a.lyse this, to separate the sweet from the bitter; but he knew that the latter prevailed. It is so little flattering to be loved when such love is the offspring of grat.i.tude. And then when that grat.i.tude is unnecessary, when it has been given in mistake for supposed favours, the acceptance of such love is little better than a cheat!

'That was not all,' said Katie, very decidedly. 'It never shall be all in my mind. If you had not been with us I should now have been drowned, and cold, and dead; and mamma! where would she have been? Oh! Charley, I shall think myself so wicked if I have said anything to vex you.'

Charley did not a.n.a.lyse his feelings, nor did Katie a.n.a.lyse hers.

It would have been impossible for her to do so. But could she have done it, and had she done it, she would have found that her grat.i.tude was but the excuse which she made to herself for a pa.s.sionate love which she could not have excused, even to herself, in any other way.

He said everything he could to rea.s.sure her and make her happy, and she soon smiled and laughed again.

'Now, that's what my editor would call a Nemesis,' said Charley.

'Oh, that's a Nemesis, is it?'

'Johnson was cheated into doing my work, and getting me my supper; and then you scolded me, and took away my appet.i.te, so that I couldn't eat it; that's a Nemesis. Johnson is avenged, only, unluckily, he doesn't know it, and wickedness is punished.'

'Well, mind you put it into the _Daily Delight_. But all the girls are going upstairs; pray let me get out,' and so Katie went upstairs again.

It was then past one. About two hours afterwards, Gertrude, looking for her sister that she might take her home, found her seated on a bench, with her feet tucked under her dress. She was very much fatigued, and she looked to be so; but there was still a bright laughing sparkle in her eye, which showed that her spirits were not even yet weary.

'Well, Katie, have you had enough dancing?'

'Nearly,' said Katie, yawning.

'You look as if you couldn't stand.'

'Yes, I am too tired to stand; but still I think I could dance a little more, only--'

'Only what?'

'Whisper,' said Katie; and Gertrude put down her ear near to her sister's lips. 'Both my shoes are quite worn out, and my toes are all out on the floor.'

It was clearly time for them to go home, so away they all went.

CHAPTER XXVII

EXCELSIOR

The last words that Katie spoke as she walked down Mrs. Val's hall, leaning on Charley's arm, as he led her to the carriage, were these--

'You will be steady, Charley, won't you? you will try to be steady, won't you, dear Charley?' and as she spoke she almost imperceptibly squeezed the arm on which she was leaning. Charley pressed her little hand as he parted from her, but he said nothing. What could he say, in that moment of time, in answer to such a request? Had he made the reply which would have come most readily to his lips, it would have been this: 'It is too late, Katie--too late for me to profit by a caution, even from you--no steadiness now will save me.' Katie, however, wanted no other answer than the warm pressure which she felt on her hand.

And then, leaning back in the carriage, and shutting her eyes, she tried to think quietly over the events of the night. But it was, alas! a dream, and yet so like reality that she could not divest herself of the feeling that the ball was still going on.

She still seemed to see the lights and hear the music, to feel herself whirled round the room, and to see others whirling, whirling, whirling on every side of her. She thought over all the names on her card, and the little contests that had taken place for her hand, and all Charley's jokes, and M. de l'Empereur's great disaster; and then as she remembered how long she had gone on twisting round with the poor unfortunate ill-used Frenchman, she involuntarily burst out into a fit of laughter.

'Good gracious, Katie, what is the matter? I thought you were asleep,' said Gertrude.

'So did I,' said Linda. 'What on earth can you be laughing at now?'

'I was laughing at myself,' said Katie, still going on with her half-suppressed chuckle, 'and thinking what a fool I was to go on dancing so long with that M. de l'Empereur. Oh dear, Gertrude, I am so tired: shall we be home soon?' and then she burst out crying.

The excitement and fatigue of the day had been too much for her, and she was now completely overcome. Ugolina Neverbend's advice, though not quite given in the kindest way, had in itself been good. Mrs. Woodward would, in truth, have been unhappy could she have seen her child at this moment. Katie made an attempt to laugh off her tears, but she failed, and her sobs then became hysterical, and she lay with her head on her married sister's shoulder, almost choking herself in her attempts to repress them.

'Dear Katie, don't sob so,' said Linda--'don't cry, pray don't cry, dear Katie.'

'She had better let it have its way,' said Gertrude; 'she will be better directly, won't you, Katie?'