Qinglian Chronicles Chapter 24

I’m a bit confused as well, but someone who wanted to a.s.sa.s.sinate me wouldn’t come up with such a c.r.a.ppy idea. This invitation was legitimately sent from Mr. Xue’s residence, and he would not bring me harm.

After turning it over in my head a few times, I decide that I do still value my little life. Besides, he only asked me not to bring Yao Jinzi, not to not bring any bodyguards at all, so I took Zhu Xianxi and Tian Chun.

It seems that five out of every ten restaurants in this world are called Taibai House or Taibai Building. This Taibai House in particular is the best, most famous, and most expensive restaurant in the capital. Compared to the ground floor, which is packed from wall-to-wall with diners, the second floor is more comfortable with a lot less people, its decor extremely gorgeous without losing its simple elegance. It’s not surprising that it claims that there isn’t a single high-ranking official or aristocratic successor in the capital who hasn’t been a guest here.

When I went upstairs, the second floor only had two or three occupied tables. The seats are semi-separated and placed very far apart from each other, so anything spoken couldn’t be easily heard by others. Mr. Xue was seated near the south side’s gated window, surprisingly all by himself.

Zhu Xianxi and Tian Chun have a lot of professionalism. One is standing under a window next to the stairs, the other is keeping watch in… some kind of open box that’s diverting traffic in the main road, standing tall.

Mr. Xue turned to see me coming and couldn’t stop himself from smiling. He welcomed me by holding both my hands. “You came, Qinglian.”

Zhang Qinglian is not tall, and has slim bones, small hands, and slender fingers. He probably puts a lot of thought and money into self-maintenance, so he’s seriously ethereally fair and soft. Mr. Xue is used to drawing bowstrings and using swords; his hands are wrapped in calluses both thick and thin. The difference is as distinct as black and white – Zhang Qinglian’s really seem to be a lot like a woman’s.

Mr. Xue is also stunned as he looked at my hands that he’s holding. He spoke cautiously, blus.h.i.+ng, “Your body is frail and hands are cold. Why don’t you wear more layers?”

I smile. “Brother Xue need not worry, spring is beginning and it’s no bother.”

He has a bit of a sorry figure as he lets go of my hand and sits down with me.

This person is an uncomplicated one – very hard to come by in the bureaucracy – and there’s no need to put a strenuous amount of effort in speaking with him, so I’m also quite relaxed.

“Brother Xue called me here today, but I don’t…”

“Oh!” He promptly picks up the conversation. This guy always seems to be somewhat fl.u.s.tered when he sees me, and it’s especially obvious when no one else is around. This isn’t at all like that group situation with those beautiful men, so could he secretly be in love with Zhang Qinglian? “It’s not for anything urgent. The first reason is that I wanted to send my thanks for going through so much trouble for my cousin, and the second is that I just wanted to invite my worthy younger brother for food and drink.”

I smile and nod. “Brother Xue has such a refined bearing, how could this little brother dare not risk his life to accompany such a gentleman? As for thanks, there’s no need to mention it at all.”

The dishes come one after another; nothing luxurious, but certainly refined. A tiny kaolin jar was sent up at this time, its shape very primitive and inelegant.

Mr. Xue gestured to the jug with a smile. “I heard that you liked to drink Pear Blossom White. This is a top-grade product from the primary wine-brewers in Fenyang, the long-standing Liu family, that they use as a sacrifice to their own ancestors, and has been fermenting for fifty years. I received it two days prior but didn’t dare keep it for myself, so today I have a special request for my brother to share it with me.”

Drinking wine, hm? I’m not afraid of it. I had social interactions nearly every day in modern times, so I can be considered a veteran drinker – and that’s not saying anything about how ancient wine isn’t very strong. When it comes to wine-tasting, though, I’ve really only had pink wine.

Three cups down the hatch, and I only have this to say: “Strong and good wine, as expected.”

Yet Mr. Xue is easy to satisfy, entirely glad.

After that, he said, “The reason I asked you not to let Xiao Zi come along today is not to keep you apart, but because some things won’t be easy to explain to him.”

Xiao Zi? That’s an affectionate name.

I fix my attention on him as I wait for him to continue.

“Brother, this older brother doesn’t know the proper words to explain this, so if you don’t like what you hear, don’t get angry with me.” He peeked at my expression and saw that it was the same as ever, then resumed speaking with anxiety and unease. “Brother, some things are fine to experience in your younger years, but now that you’re grown, what’s with this image of continuing to mix with men all day long? …The previous emperor is gone now and cannot prohibit you from taking a wife. Furthermore, you must take into consideration that ‘of all the ways to be unfilial, having no son is the worst,’ [1] you must have someone to burn incense for you later… a stately of-age man, magnanimous to all, who wouldn’t greatly treasure your affection?…”

It appears that discussing this topic is making a certain Mr. Xue feel very awkward. He’s long-winded, at times fervently impa.s.sioned, at times speaking sincerely and earnestly for a half-day’s time, all leading up to this topic:

“My little sister, as you probably already know, was originally in a marriage contract with Xiao Zi since childhood, which Uncle Yao later broke, and Mother called off the engagement — if Father were still around he definitely wouldn’t agree with this, and I don’t approve either, but it’s just that she dotes on her daughter, and as we’re the juniors, it’s not easy for us to speak against her… my sister is two years older than Jinzi, being nineteen this year. My mother and I talked it over; the court nowadays is full of high civil and martial public officials whose age, countenance, and looks are worthy enough, and yet the only one who is unmarried is you, brother… though my sister is as feeble as a willow and barely enough to enter the eye in the end, she’s been clever since she was little, learning a lot in literature and martial arts, and though she has a propensity to be mischievous, she is charitable from the bottom of her heart… if she is allowed to serve a n.o.bleman, our two families will be joined together…”

So he’s wanting to propose a marriage for me.

And the partner is Yao Jinzi’s former fiancée!

I get lost in thought.

I really want to say that this is a great opportunity for a political marriage. The greater chunk of who I currently have to rely on, aside from my own unprincipled disciples, is Shao Qing’s troops and the northern land-owners that the Shao family represents. The Xue family is related to a founding general and is a high-ranking prestigious name that has been in the capital for generations. Roping them in would be helpful in breaking up and weakening the Weiqi, and I’d be able to bolster my own power.

But…

First of all, I can’t imagine myself going to marry a woman and having her be my wife afterwards! Thinking about this sends chills up my spine. Taking what Zhang Qinglian left behind is one thing, having me take up a wife is another…

I can’t even picture the sight of the Zhang residence having a madam. How could Hong Feng wait upon her when she’s nominally my lover/maid who also runs the estate? If that woman came in, wouldn’t the first thing she’d do be to sweep her out of here?

And for Yao Jinzi, this woman is his ex-fiancée, the one who was originally going to be his wife. What would happen when those two saw each other? I don’t want her to have a cloud of jealousy over her head before she even crosses the threshold, y’know? Jinzi is so elegantly and heroically beautiful, too… I don’t even know who’d be drinking the vinegar in that scenario!

It’s out of the question! Zhang residence may be big, but it has no room for another woman!

Noticing that I wasn’t saying anything, Mr. Xue spoke softly, “Mother asked me to come and talk to you, brother, and if you were willing, we would set up a marriage for you… but if you don’t wish to get married now, don’t force yourself. Though I’d very much like to become in-laws with you, Qinglian, I don’t want to make things hard for you if you’re unwilling…”

I raise my head to meet his eyes, seeing that’s he’s completely sincere and warm. It’s clear that he’s quite fond of Zhang Qinglian.

“…You being in such a position, Qinglian, there are many things outside of your control, and I know of the bitterness in your heart. There’s a lot of words spoken outside that are hard to listen to, and I know that you’re not that kind of person, brother, just that you had no other choice… like the matter with my cousin, things must be very difficult for you to bear, brother. Even I have done something to make things harder for you, brother…sigh, my heart has room for nothing but guilt…”

“You must not give in to despair due to past matters, brother, so listen to this brother’s next sentence – the relations.h.i.+p between a man and a woman is the greatest one can have. You do not have to continue to be engrossed in such abnormality, brother, I know that it’s not your true nature… if you are afraid of General Shao being unwilling, I will go and speak to him on your behalf, he is not the unreasonable type…”

He talked for so long and in such a roundabout way, my mouth was agape just listening. All these heartfelt words were just to persuade Zhang Qinglian not to be gay anymore?

However, it’s really not normal for me to see him be so concerned about Zhang Qinglian.

Furthermore, according to what he said, Zhang Qinglian is actually an innocent man who is envied by others, and because he was born beautiful, was forced to be with pathetic people with deviant s.e.xual orientations? And all the horrible things he’s done were because he had no better option? Was he ‘forced’ to bring up catamites, too?

Sometimes people’s thought processes are… way too out-there.

Regarding this old pal who still has yet to find his mind, I naturally won’t prompt for him to cause trouble for himself, so I’ll just go along with it. I give him a half-nod and speak with some sadness, “Many thanks for Brother Xue’s kindness, but my body has already become tainted, and I am not willing to take a wife in this life… Young Lady Xue is a precious one from a renowned family while I have humble origins. The Young Lady must not be blasphemed with my climbing the social ladder…”

Mr. Xue quickly refuted my standpoint. I directly said a few words of self-pity, self-despair, and self-condemnation. Hearing this old chap be so worried and pained really made me want to hug and console him, but I barely held myself back.

After a long back-and-forth, he said, “If you’re really not wanting to, Qinglian, I won’t force you, I just ask that you think about it thoroughly.”

I promised to consider it when I went back. He wasn’t sure what to say for a moment, then brought up Jinzi. “The thing with Uncle Yao, there wasn’t any choice but to cancel the marriage. I feel that I’ve let Xiao Zi down immensely, but I just can’t go against Mother… that child, Xiao Zi, is a prideful one, so meeting with such a huge misfortune is a huge blow to him, but luckily you’re looking after him, so I can be at ease. There’s also talk of how you brought ruin to Uncle Yao, how ridiculous! But now it seems that Xiao Zi doesn’t believe in the rumors…”

I’m now thinking this is most laughable thing Sir Son-in-Law has said. Zhang Qinglian taking care of Yao Jinzi? Is putting chains on him and securing him to the bed ‘taking care of’ him? This man seems to believe that Zhang Qinglian is a long-suffering angel.

Is he too blinded by his emotions, or is Zhang Qinglian too good of an actor?

I’m really not sure what to say. Bosom-buddy Xue is talking my ear off, asking me of my well-being and diet with utter affection.

My mind wanders a bit.

The sky outside the window is already dark, and light rain has begun to float down, as it often has recently. There’s an alley down below, but due to this being a famous restaurant, it’s full of the parked carriages and palanquins of the wealthy as well as heavy traffic. There are also a few 10-year-old poor girls dressed in thin clothes carrying baskets full of plum blossoms and premature winter jasmine to sell. There are also a few 10-year-old poor girls dressed in thin clothes and carrying baskets full of plum blossoms and premature winter jasmine. In another month or two, there will be a “listening to the spring rain in my little manor at night, someone will be selling apricot blossoms deep in the alley tomorrow morning” kind of mood. [1]

I watched the countless points of light reflecting off the tiny raindrops, listened to the sound of carts and horses and people, and suddenly felt a tinge of loneliness within my heart, slightly cold and distant.

What’s Jinzi doing at home right now? Is he keeping watch under lantern light, the swaying faint yellow glow s.h.i.+ning off his young and beautiful face that’s deliberately set into an unwavering line? Is he in the middle of examining the cla.s.swork of his beloved younger brother? Is he demonstrating to him on how to wield a sword? Is he quietly wiping clean the edge of a blade that hasn’t been stained with blood in ages, wanting to use it to sacrifice his enemy – me – in three years time, unconsciously biting his lips?

I suddenly want to go back home.

Ah, I’ve already taken to calling the Zhang residence home. In modern times, my largely empty yet expensive house, which I had decorated like a modern art museum, was never once called “home” by me.

All sorts of rueful sentiments are tangled up in my heart. I tilt my neck upwards and drink down a cup of wine, clicking my chopsticks together as I drawl, “…There are two red chambers fronting the cold, hidden by the rain, and a lantern on a pearl screen swaying my lone heart homeward…” [2]

Putting my cup down, I unexpectedly find that Mr. Xue is looking at me in astonishment.

What’s with that face? Even if Zhang Qinglian is semiliterate, can it be that he’s never read Li Shangyin’s poems? Or is it because Zhang Qinglian’s voice is music to the ears when reciting poetry?

“B…Brother…” Mr. Xue seems overly amazed. “Is that a verse you wrote?”

That… I wrote? I can’t believe this. Is he illiterate too?

A sudden burst of noise came from next door. A moment later, a few young scholars fled to our side. The first one over was wearing a pale blue overcoat, and shouted loudly, “Which one of you was just saying poetry? It’s a very good poem…”

Another one followed close after, his voice steady. He’s wearing long, blue-gray robes, with a marten-fur coat draped across his shoulders. “Bai Feng, you’re always so impatient. Don’t forget your manners…”

When the man raised his face to see Mr. Xue and I, he couldn’t stop himself from blurting out, “Sir Zhang? Commander Xue?”

Mr. Xue and I are also startled, because this is Zhou Zizhu of the Imperial Hanlin Academy.

Calling that guy "son-in-law Xue" all the time was getting on my nerves, so I overrode the original text and used Mr. Xue instead. Also he talks way too d.a.m.n much and I hate him

[1] Quote from Mencius. TL;DR for those not in the know is that in traditional Chinese values, respecting your family/ancestors is a huge thing, and girls aren’t allowed to carry on the family name, so having no sons = bad. Different culture, same BS, honestly.

[2] From Lu You’s poem "Lin'an's Spring Rain Has Just Cleared Up". I can't find a good or consistent English translation for it, or even a page on it.

[3] From Li Shangyin's "Spring Rain". Translation directly lifted from .