Ten Thousand a-Year Volume I Part 31

"Fine gal--devilish fine!" replied Snap.

"I'm blessed if I don't think--'pon my life, I believe we've met before!"

"Didn't seem to know you though!"---- quoth Snap, somewhat dryly.

"Ah! you don't know--How uncommon infernal unfortunate to happen just at the moment when"---- t.i.tmouse became silent; for all of a sudden he recollected when and where, and under what circ.u.mstances he had seen Miss Aubrey before, and which his vanity would not allow of his telling Snap. The fact was, that she had once accompanied her sister-in-law to Messrs. Tag-rag and Company's, to purchase some small matter of mercery.

t.i.tmouse had served them; and his absurdity of manner and personal appearance had provoked a smile, which t.i.tmouse a little misconstrued; for when, a Sunday or two afterwards, he met her in the Park, the little fool actually had the presumption to nod to her--she having not the slightest notion who the little wretch might be--and of course not having, on the present occasion, the least recollection of him. The reader will recollect that this incident made a deep impression on the mind of Mr. t.i.tmouse.

The coincidence was really not a little singular--but to return to Mr.

Aubrey and his sister. After riding a mile or two farther up the road, they leaped over a very low mound or fence, which formed the extreme boundary of that part of the estate, and having pa.s.sed through a couple of fields, they entered the eastern extremity of that fine avenue of elms, at the higher end of which stood Kate's favorite tree, and also Waters and his under-bailiff--who looked to her like a couple of executioners, only awaiting the fiat of her brother. The sun shone brightly upon the doomed sycamore--"the axe was laid at its root." As they rode up the avenue, Kate begged very hard for mercy; but for once her brother seemed obdurate--the tree, he said, _must_ come down--'t was all nonsense to think of leaving it standing any longer!--

"Remember, Charles," said she, pa.s.sionately, as they drew up, "how we've all of us romped and sported under it! Poor papa also"----

"See, Kate, how rotten it is," said her brother; and riding close to it, with his whip he snapped off two or three of its feeble silvery-gray branches--"it's high time for it to come down."

"It fills the gra.s.s all round with little branches, sir, whenever there's the least breath of wind," said Waters.

"It won't hardly hold a crow's weight on the topmost branches, sir,"

added d.i.c.kons, the under-bailiff, very modestly.

"Had it any leaves last summer?" inquired Mr. Aubrey.

"I don't think, sir," replied Waters, "it had a hundred all over it!"

"Really, Kate," said her brother, "'t is such a melancholy, unsightly object, when seen from any part of the Hall"--turning round on his horse to look at the rear of the Hall, which was at about two hundred yards'

distance. "It looks such an old withered thing among the fresh green trees around it--'t is quite a painful contrast." Kate had gently urged on her horse while her brother was speaking, till she was close beside him. "Charles," said she, in a low whisper, "does not it remind you a little of poor old mamma, with her gray hairs, among her children and grandchildren? _She_ is not out of place among us--is she?" Her eyes filled with tears. So did her brother's.

"Dearest Kate," said he, with emotion, affectionately grasping her little hand, "you have triumphed! The old tree shall never be cut down in my time! Waters, let the tree stand; and if anything _is_ to be done to it--let the greatest possible _care_ be taken of it." Miss Aubrey turned her head aside to conceal her emotion. Had they been alone, she would have flung her arms round her brother's neck.

"If I were to speak my mind, sir," said the compliant Waters, seeing the turn things were taking, "I should say, with our young lady, the old tree's quite a kind of ornament in this here situation, and (as one might say) it sets off the rest." [It was he who had been worrying Mr.

Aubrey for these last three years to have it cut down!]

"Well," replied Mr. Aubrey, "however that may be, let me hear no more of cutting it down--Ah! what does old Jolter want here?" said he, observing an old tenant of that name, almost bent double with age, hobbling towards them. He was wrapped up in a coa.r.s.e thick blue coat; his hair was long and white; his eyes dim and gla.s.sy with age.

"I don't know, sir--I'll go and see," said Waters.

"What's the matter, Jolter?" he inquired, stepping forward to meet him.

"Nothing much, sir," replied the old man, feebly, and panting, taking off his hat, and bowing very low towards Mr. and Miss Aubrey.

"Put your hat on, my old friend," said Mr. Aubrey, kindly.

"I only come to bring you this bit of paper, sir, if you please," said the old man, addressing Waters. "You said, a while ago, as how I was always to bring you papers that were left with me; and this"--taking one out of his pocket--"was left with me only about an hour ago. It's seemingly a lawyer's paper, and was left by an uncommon gay young chap.

He asked me my name, and then he looked at the paper, and read it all over to me, but I couldn't make anything of it."

"What is it?" inquired Mr. Aubrey, as Waters cast his eye over a sheet of paper, partly printed and partly written.

"Why, it seems the old story, sir--that slip of waste land, sir. Mr.

Tomkins is at it again, sir."

"Well, if he chooses to spend his money in that way, I can't help it,"

said Mr. Aubrey, with a smile. "Let me look at the paper." He did so.

"Yes, it seems the same kind of thing as before. Well," handing it back, "send it to Mr. Parkinson, and tell him to look to it; and, at all events, take care that poor old Jolter comes to no trouble by the business. How's the old wife, Jacob?"

"She's dreadful bad with rheumatis, sir; but the stuff that Madam sends her does her a woundy deal of good, sir, in her inside."

"Well, we must try if we can't send you some more; and, harkee, if the goodwife doesn't get better soon, send us up word to the Hall, and we'll have the doctor call on her. Now, Kate, let us away homeward." And they were soon out of sight.

I do not intend to deal so unceremoniously or summarily as Mr. Aubrey did, with the doc.u.ment which had been brought to his notice by Jolter, then handed over to Waters, and by him, according to orders, transmitted the next day to Mr. Parkinson, Mr. Aubrey's attorney. It was what is called a "DECLARATION IN EJECTMENT;" touching which, in order to throw a ray or two of light upon a doc.u.ment which will make no small figure in this history, I shall try to give the reader a little information on the point; and hope that a little attention to what now follows, will be repaid in due time. Here beginneth a little lecture on law.

If _Jones_ claim a _debt_, or _goods_, or _damages_, from _Smith_, one should think that, if he went to law, the action would be ent.i.tled "Jones _versus_ Smith;" and so it is. But behold, if it be LAND which is claimed by Jones from Smith, the style and name of the cause stand thus:--"DOE, on the demise of Jones, _versus_ ROE." Instead, therefore, of Jones and Smith fighting out the matter in their own proper names, they set up a couple of puppets, (called "John Doe" and "Richard Roe,") who fall upon one another in a very quaint fas.h.i.+on, after the manner of Punch and Judy. John Doe pretends to be the real plaintiff, and Richard Roe the real defendant. John Doe says that the land which Richard Roe has, is his, (the said John Doe's,) because _Jones_ (the real plaintiff) gave him a lease of it; and _Jones_ is then called "the lessor of the plaintiff." John Doe further says that one Richard Roe, (who calls himself by the very significant and expressive name of a "_Casual Ejector_,") came and turned him out, and so John Doe brings his action against Richard Roe. 'Tis a fact, that whenever land is sought to be recovered in England, this anomalous and farcical proceeding must be adopted.[15] It is the duty of the _real_ plaintiff (Jones) to serve on the _real_ defendant (Smith) a copy of the queer doc.u.ment which I shall proceed to lay before the reader; and also to append to it an affectionate note, intimating the serious consequences which will ensue upon inattention or contumacy. The "Declaration," then, which had been served upon old Jolter, was in the words, letters, and figures following--that is to say:--

"IN THE KING'S BENCH.

"Michaelmas Term, the---- of King----.

"YORKs.h.i.+RE, to-wit--Richard Roe was attached to answer John Doe of a plea wherefore the said Richard Roe, with force and arms, &c., entered into two messuages, two dwelling-houses, two cottages, two stables, two out-houses, two yards, two gardens, two orchards, twenty acres of land covered with water, twenty acres of arable land, twenty acres of pasture land, and twenty acres of other land, with the appurtenances, situated in _Yatton_, in the county of York, which t.i.tTLEBAT t.i.tMOUSE, Esquire, had demised to the said John Doe for a term which is not yet expired, and ejected him from his said farm, and other wrongs to the said John Doe there did, to the great damage of the said John Doe, and against the peace of our Lord the King, &c.; and Thereupon the said John Doe, by OILY GAMMON, his attorney, complains,--

"That whereas the said t.i.tTLEBAT t.i.tMOUSE, on the --th day of August, in the year of our Lord 18--, at Yatton aforesaid, in the county aforesaid, had demised the same tenements, with the appurtenances, to the said John Doe, to have and to hold the same to the said John Doe and his a.s.signs thenceforth, for and during, and unto the full end and term of twenty years thence next ensuing, and fully to be completed and ended: By virtue of which said demise, the said John Doe entered into the said tenements, with the appurtenances, and became and was thereof possessed for the said term, so to him thereof granted as aforesaid. And the said John Doe being so thereof possessed, the said Richard Roe afterwards, to-wit, on the day and year aforesaid, at the parish aforesaid, in the county aforesaid, with force and arms, that is to say with swords, staves, and knives, &c., entered into the said tenements, with the appurtenances, which the said t.i.tTLEBAT t.i.tMOUSE had demised to the said John Doe in manner and for the term aforesaid, which is not yet expired, and ejected the said John Doe out of his said farm; and other wrongs to the said John Doe then and there did, to the great damage of the said John Doe, and against the peace of our said Lord the now King. Wherefore the said John Doe saith that he is injured, and hath sustained damage to the value of 50, and therefore he brings his suit, &c.

"SQUEAL, for the Plaintiff. { Pledges of } John Den.

GROWL, for the Defendant. { Prosecution. } Richard Fenn.

"MR. JACOB JOLTER,

"I am informed that you are in possession of, or claim t.i.tle to, the premises in this Declaration of Ejectment mentioned, or to some part thereof: And I, being sued in this action as a _casual ejector_ only, and having no claim or t.i.tle to the same, do advise you to appear, next Hilary term, in His Majesty's Court of King's Bench at Westminster, by some attorney of that Court; and then and there, by a rule to be made of the same Court, to cause yourself to be made defendant in my stead; otherwise, I shall suffer judgment to be entered against me by default, and you will be turned out of possession.

"Your loving friend, RICHARD ROE.

"Dated this 8th day of December 18--."[16]

You may regard the above doc.u.ment in the light of a deadly and destructive missile, thrown by an unperceived enemy into a peaceful citadel; attracting no particular notice from the innocent unsuspecting inhabitants--among whom, nevertheless, it presently explodes, and all is terror, death, and ruin.

Mr. Parkinson, Mr. Aubrey's solicitor, who resided at Grilston, the post-town nearest to Yatton, from which it was distant about six or seven miles, was sitting on the evening of Tuesday the 28th December 18--, in his office, nearly finis.h.i.+ng a letter to his London agents, Messrs. Runnington and Company--one of the most eminent firms in the profession--and which he was desirous of despatching by that night's mail. Among other papers which have come into my hands in connection with this history, I have happened to light on the letter which he was writing; and as it is not long, and affords a specimen of the way in which business is carried on between town and country attorneys and solicitors, here followeth a copy of it:--

"Grilston, 28th Dec. 18--.

"DEAR SIRS,

"_Re Middleton_.

"Have you got the marriage-settlements between these parties ready?

If so, please send them as soon as possible; for both the lady's and gentleman's friends are (as usual in such cases) very pressing for them.

"_Puddinghead_ v. _Quickwit_.

"Plaintiff bought a horse of defendant in November last, 'warranted sound,' and paid for it on the spot 64. A week afterwards, his attention was accidentally drawn to the animal's head; and to his infinite surprise, he discovered that the left eye was a _gla.s.s eye_, so closely resembling the other in color, that the difference could not be discovered except on a very close examination. I have seen it myself, and it is indeed wonderfully well done. My countrymen are certainly pretty sharp hands in such matters--but this beats everything I ever heard of. Surely this is a breach of the warranty? Or is it to be considered a _patent_ defect, which would not be within the warranty?[17]--Please take pleader's opinion, and particularly as to whether the horse could be brought into court to be viewed by the court and jury, which would have a great effect. If your pleader thinks the action will lie, let him draw declaration, _venue_--Lancas.h.i.+re (for my client would have no chance with a Yorks.h.i.+re jury,) if you think the _venue_ is transitory, and that defendant would not be successful on a motion to change it. _Qu._--Is the man who sold the horse to defendant a _competent[18] witness_ for the plaintiff, to prove that, when he sold it to defendant, it had but one eye, and that on this account the horse was sold for less?

"_Mule_ v. _Stott_.