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Claims to have a son. Family history denied.
SOCIAL HISTORY:.
Claims was not adhering to the prescribed meds.
PAST MEDICAL HISTORY: Non contributory except status post accident, premenstrual dysphonic disorder, history of postpartum depression?
MENTAL STATUS HISTORY:.
The patient was dressed in hospital gown. Mood down. Affect depressed, agitated. Speech pressured, screaming loudly, feeling extremely upset, manic symptomatology noted. At this point patient is going through agitation and mood liability with depression at the same time. Claimed to have seen angels and was pulled down beneath the bottom of the lake. Clearly delusional.
The doctor did know all this then, I thought, but how in the world would he believe a psychopath, like me? Everything was in my file and plain as day, and no one believed my experience to be true. That date bothered me too. How could I go from October twenty-first to November first unseen and undetected?
It was getting dark again, and I could feel myself changing. The excruciating pain pierced through my body like several scalpels slicing open my skin. The blue blood was starting to seep through my pores and molding on my body like a coc.o.o.n. Like a statue, I couldn't move.
As I changed I tried to put the pieces together as to what truly happened to me. How could I have committed suicide, as my body lay washed along the sh.o.r.e ten days later? What happened during the time I was dead, and most importantly, who was Chris?
With my transformation now complete, I took flight in a search to find more answers.
Chapter Seven.
I went back to the island where Benjamin was, to see if he knew anything, but he was nowhere in sight. Above the swaying palm trees I flew, swimming inside the moon-lit sky. I could feel the ocean spray in the air. I spotted a flas.h.i.+ng light down below, flickering inside a cave.
I landed on the jagged rock with the cras.h.i.+ng waves at my feet. I gripped on quickly with my claws and dug into the rock. I could smell that same familiar smell again; whiskey mingled with the scent of an old fire. Benjamin had to be near.
The cool breeze drifted through my feathers as I entered inside the cave and walked along the slick, black rocks. Delicate limestone formations hung on the ceiling as if the upper walls had millions of huge, piercing fangs. It was cold and quiet, and only a few drops of water dripped into mirror-like puddles. I could taste the minerals in the air. As I got closer, the light grew, making a halo effect above the pools of water.
Once I got to an open area, I could see someone had been living there for a while. It had to be Benjamin's lair. The markings on the walls were of Egyptian-like drawings. People were dancing around a fire with masks on. Their snouts protruded like that of a dog, yet had scales and teeth like some kind of prehistoric animal. Their eyes glowed red, and their bodies dripped in blue.
Dear G.o.d, I thought. These drawings looked just like me. I stepped in closer to take a look to see if I could find some kind of writing or dates, but everything was in symbols and foreign markings I couldn't make out.
I scanned the area trying to search for more clues, and that's when I heard a noise. It felt like someone was breathing down my neck.
"Benjamin? Are you there?" I called out. My voice echoed, at first loud, then softer until it disappeared. I continued to look around, but no one was there.
I felt enclosed and started to hyperventilate. I had to get out of there and fast. I was scared Benjamin or something else was watching my every move.
Once I ran back to the opening, I leaped off the edge and started to fly.
I had the urge to see Jesse. I knew where he lived as he once mentioned it. I remembered his number and address as if it was my own. He gave me the information, not only so we could communicate, but for emergency purposes, too.
I could see I was getting close as I noticed the Golden Gate Bridge lit up like a string of pearls. Feeling tired of flying, yet forcing myself through the cold air, I finally got to his place.
As I circled Jesse's house, I could see he wasn't home yet. The neighborhood was dark and quiet, so I decided to land underneath the thickly shadowed trees.
After waiting there for a few minutes, I saw him pulling up in the driveway. He wasn't alone. He got out of the car and walked around to the other side to open the door. He was helping Sarah out of the car. She must have just left the hospital as I could clearly see she was still weak.
"I appreciate this, I really do," she said to him, taking his hand.
"Sarah, I just want you to get better."
They walked inside the house and turned on the light. Through the window I could see him placing her on the couch.
What am I doing here? I thought. I shouldn't be spying on him like this, yet I couldn't take my eyes off them. I was a little upset he took her in. Here I was supposed to help her and save her from killing herself, but yet she seemed so happy.
"You mustn't do this," a voice stuttered from behind me.
I turned around and saw a glowing light. "Delmara!"
"The time will come when you will be needed. The prophecy shows she will attempt her death the eve of your annual."
"That's tomorrow. How will I know?"
"You will know when the time comes. Come, my child, rest your eyes from this sight. I fear it may disturb you." She took me under her wing and s.h.i.+elded me.
Before I could look away, I saw Jesse one last time. He bent over to kiss Sarah before he turned out the light.
I found myself lying in my bed crying. I missed my old life very much, but most of all I missed Drake. I desperately wanted to see him again, but it was forbidden. His sixth-year birthday had just pa.s.sed, and I wondered how he was doing. I knew my mother was taking good care of him, but it still hurt. There was this unbearable feeling in the pit of my mind that I couldn't escape.
I remembered the last time I had seen him. It was just little over a year ago. He was starting kindergarten and was nervous for that whole first month. I tried the best I could, but just looking at his face reminded me of his father. I couldn't bear the thought of him. The time I became pregnant kept repeating in my mind. I lived on the streets the whole nine months before I came back to my mother. Once I had Drake, I couldn't handle it on the streets with my son alone. I was desperate to come back home.
I had so many dark periods in my previous life that I started to forget who I was. After all that had happened, I wasn't going to let Drake have a life like mine. I was never able to fit into the "real" world. Back then, all the so-called friends I had were users and abusers.
Delmara said if I saved Sarah I would be rewarded in some way or another. Benjamin said he was rewarded with new physical attributes every year. I wondered if it was a different kind of reward for saving a life. Would I be able to see my son again?
Chapter Eight.
I woke up around five in the morning, like usual, and got ready for work. The night before had been traumatic for me, seeing Jesse take care of Sarah like that. Was he still in love with her? That kiss on the forehead did look like it was in a loving way, but in a more caring manner than anything. Why did Sarah want to kill herself so bad? I mean Jesse was still in her life, but not as her boyfriend. There had to be something more to it. I still couldn't understand why.
I stepped into the shower, again was.h.i.+ng the sand and soot off me. I thought of Benjamin. What was he up to? I hadn't heard from him and had no other way of contacting him other than to try to see if he was at his laira"if that was even his lair. I still couldn't make out how old the markings were. The dying fire had looked like it was sparked up only hours before.
I washed my body, turned the shower off and toweled myself dry. I heard the phone and answered it on the first ring.
"Thinking of me again?" a low voice gave out.
"Who is this?"
"You couldn't have possibly forgotten about me, have you?"
Through the phone I felt a tingling feeling fluttering inside my chest. It was as if a pillow fight had gone on inside me. My palms began to sweat as did my upper lip, yet I felt that familiar sensation, and then I knew.
"Benjamin!"
"None other!"
"How did you know my number?"
"Dear girl, haven't you learned yet? I am adorned with gifted talent," he said, sounding amused.
His laughter echoed through me like I was holding a sh.e.l.l up to my ear.
"What do you want?" I said in a curt tone. Even though I was slightly intrigued to hear his voice, I still didn't trust him, but there was something about him I was undeniably attracted to. He was the same as I. He could see right through me, all without having to say a word.
"What do I want? You were the one that came to me, so what do you want?"
He was tricky with his wording. It always seemed like a riddle when we spoke. Everything was a game to him, and the very words spoken amused him.
"I smelled you a mile away when I came back to my cozy little home. Did you like, by the way?"
"I don't have time for this."
"Oh, you'll make the time. You want your questions answered, don't you?"
"Okayawhat do you want from me? What's the catch?" I gripped the phone firmly in my hand and paced around the room in just a towel wrapped around my wet body. I could hear my heart beat faster.
"Not so fast, my sweet. You will know when it is time."
There was a sudden silence over the phone.
"Benjamin? Are you still there?"
The conversation was over; either he'd hung up, or the line went dead.
I arrived at Lucky's twenty minutes after I was supposed to start. Jan was running back and forth filling in for my tardiness. I could see the look of disappointment in her face.
"Charlene, I need to speak with you when you get settled in," she said as the door swung closed behind her.
I took my coat off and punched in. I started to feel nauseous again as if something was about to happena"another vision maybe? As I took a deep breath, I tried to calm my thoughts. The hairs on my back of my neck were standing up and so were the hairs on my arms. The room felt static, as if something wasn't right.
I saw Jan walk into her office and followed a few minutes later.
"Would you mind telling me why you were running late? If this becomes a habit, maybe different hours are in order. Do I need to put you on the late s.h.i.+ft?"
"NoaummaI'm sorry. It won't happen again." I stumbled over my words as I spoke. I couldn't be on the night s.h.i.+ft; that would ruin everything.
"You said that before. Look, you know the other girls are just itching to get on the morning s.h.i.+ft. I have girls that have worked here longer than you and are still working nights."
"I know, and I'm really sorry. I've been caught up with my writing lately. I get carried away sometimes and don't realize the time." I was sweating it out because it was sort of a lie. She knew I liked to write poetry and even had work published, but that wasn't truly the reason why I was running late. I wondered what kind of repercussions I would endure having to lie to her.
"Listen, if you need to talk about it, I'm here for you, Charlene. You're a sweet girla"don't say mucha*but I like you, and the customers like you too. I will give you another chance, but note this as a verbal warning. The next time might be your last."
After talking to Jan, the nausea seemed to go away on its own. I thought I would have another vision right in the office when talking to her.
I ran to the bathroom to freshen up. I could feel the beads of sweat running down my forehead. Thank G.o.d my sweat was clear otherwise I would be in big trouble. I patted my face with cold water and took a peek in the mirror. Nothing seemed unusual, with the exception of my eyes. They had changed color a little, and a yellow tinge had formed around my pupils, swelling in with the green. I pa.s.sed it off since no one seemed to notice.
As I exited the bathroom, I started waiting on my tables. The first table I went to had a man sitting alone in one of the booths near the window. He had his head buried in the menu.
I walked up to his table and said, "h.e.l.lo, I'm Charlene. I'll be your server today. Can I get you some coffee?"
After he lowered his menu away from his face, I felt a surge of energy. It was as if someone had turned on a powerful light source within me.
"Charlene?" he asked. He was in his fifties with salt-and-pepper hair. His face looked oddly familiar, like I had seen him somewhere before. I tried to rack my brain as to where, but I couldn't think of it.
"Can I help you?" I asked him.
"All these years and you don't remember?"
Suddenly it hit me, and a rush of memories flooded my mind. I remembered walking through the dead leaves on a brisk fall day, holding hands with a man similar to him, yet much younger, then it dawned on me; I knew this man.
"Dad?"
Chapter Nine.
I was free-falling through a tunnel of water. I could feel myself descending as if I was in an elevator going down, yet my body was in mid-air, floating still. Once I reached the ground, the whirling water dropped like rain and surrounded my feet. I waded through two feet of water, grazing my hands against the black stone walls. Was I in a cave of some sort? Had I been taken back into Benjamin's lair?
Confused and scared, my heart beat like a racehorse pounding against the dirt-road track. Some kind of sticky dew glistened against my skin, and there was a light. As the light grew stronger, the water started to bubble around my legs as if I was standing in a Jacuzzi.
"Charlene, I must warn you." It was Delmara's voice, but the light was so magnificently bright, I could not see her. I felt a force surrounding mea"a gentle wind pulling me in.
"Seek and you will find that heartache awaits you," she said as the water continued to bubble. I could feel it rising. "Stay on course, or you will endure a deeper h.e.l.l."
I couldn't understand what she meant by that. One minute I was at work and the next I was in some kind of other realm, a realm that seemed somewhat familiar to me, yet I was overwhelmed with loss.