My Girlfriend is a Mahou Shoujo! Vol 1 Chapter 1

Chapter 1 – The First Great Magical War

“Stop bothering me, I like Wu Shao, I don’t like you anymore.”

“Hey lil’ punk, ya hear that? Get outta here!”

Zhang Shaoyu’s heart ached when he recalled what just happened. His girlfriend just got stolen by some other guy. With those emotions dwelling in his drunken heart, he kicked over a trash can in an alley, pointed at the sky and yelled, “You f.u.c.king b.i.t.c.h! Gold digger, not even a single ounce of purity!”

Zhang Shaoyu was a student at Nan Jiang(1) High School. Throughout the two years there, he’d already confessed to more than twenty girls, but got rejected every time. His cla.s.smates gave him the nickname ‘good person king’.

Of course, this does not mean that he really was a good person. But, every time he confessed, the girls he confessed to would say the same thing. ‘You’re a good person, but we’re not suited for each other’, and that is how he got the nickname.

In reality, Zhang Shaoyu had ordinary looks, no special traits, nor was he rich, and as the saying goes, heroes often fall prey to beauty. But, if you’re not a hero, beauties will just let you pa.s.s.
Recently, however, with Zhang Shaoyu’s unrelenting perseverance, a cla.s.smate named Ma Li got tired of him– Wait no! She was so moved that she agreed to become his girlfriend.

Zhang Shaoyu was thrilled, thinking that his springtime had finally come. It seemed like the good luck he was predicted to have when he prayed to Wong Tai Sin(2) was true. He didn’t usually believe in the supernatural, but this time, he really wanted to embrace and wildly kiss that Great Immortal.

But his springtime was too d.a.m.ned short. In not even a week, Zhang Shaoyu was already plunged into an ice age. To have ‘worn a green hat’(3) was ten times more humiliating than a direct rejection, f.u.c.k!

The more Zhang Shaoyu thought about this, the more frustrated he became. Throwing his liquor bottle down onto the ground with one hand, he yelled to the heavens, “All you b.i.t.c.hes! What’s so great about you?! Mark my words, I’ll find someone more beautiful than you!”

After shouting out, he felt somewhat better. Drunkenly returning home, he immediately pa.s.sed out on the sofa.

Zhang Shaoyu’s parents ran a small business overseas, which was why he’d been living by himself since middle school, keeping himself alive with the money his parents sent him each month. Due to the lack of discipline, Zhang Shaoyu had been lazy from a young age. As a result, his studies weren’t very good, barely sc.r.a.ping by and getting him into a third-rate high school.

However, the treasured seat of the first place from the bottom was still his for this past two years.

Although this was a third-rate school, many rich kids came here. Money makes the world go round(4) these days, and this school was some ‘high-cla.s.s’ school. The headmaster’s name was Qian Jinxin, so if it wasn’t money, it was gold(5). From this, anyone could imagine how legitimate this school’s educational philosophy was.

But once there were a lot of rich people, there were going to be a lot of good looking guys and girls, since they had all the free time to dress themselves up. Which was why this school became the concentration camp of good looking guys and girls in Nan Jiang.

Zhang Shaoyu awoke groggily, not knowing for how long he had slept, when a red light suddenly a.s.saulted his eyelids. He opened his eyes irritated, “The heck, the sun’s up already!?”

However, when he glanced at the balcony, he froze. There was someone shrouded in red light standing outside the balcony.

“What the? There’s someone outside there?”

Zhang Shaoyu couldn’t believe his own eyes. After all, there was someone standing outside his home?

Zhang Shaoyu stood up, rubbed his eyes, and looked carefully once again. The person wasn’t holding on to the railing, wasn’t standing on any sort of platform, and wasn’t using a bamboo-copter(6)or anything of the sort. That person just stood there. Or to be more precise, the person was ‘floating’. That person was just floating in midair.

The wind fluttered the figure’s clothes. Despite the stinging red light which prevented Zhang Shaoyu from opening his eyes to see the person’s face clearly, he deduced that the person was probably a woman from the figure’s long hair.

Zhang Shaoyu stood there, trembling at the sight of the red-clad girl. He uttered in disbelief,

“What is she? A ghost? A G.o.ddess? An alien? Am I considered lucky or unlucky to stumble upon this kind of supernatural phenomenon?”

“That devil! Where’d you go?! Hand over the Sacred Blood Stone!”

A woman’s voice came from nowhere, and suddenly, a white ray of light spread across the horizon. Then, like meteors, dozens of metallic daggers flew towards the red-clad girl.

The red-clad girl evaded, already moving hundreds of meters away from the balcony. The room that was just covered with red light suddenly went dark again. The stunned Zhang Shaoyu could only say, “Flying so far in such a short time… Did she teleport?”

Zhang Shaoyu disregarded everything else and jumped onto the balcony, holding on to the railing while looking towards the distant sky at the red and white lights, which were flying back and forth.

Both dots left a trail of light as they flew, crisscrossing on the skyline. Sparks scattered every time their paths intersected. The white dot would fire daggers at the red dot while the latter would try to evade the strikes.

Although the battle had just begun, the white light was obviously overpowering the red. Though the red light was able to avoid all the attacks from the white light up until now, it showed no signs of retaliating. At this rate, the red light would be defeated sooner or later.

Zhang Shaoyu observed the battle of the two lights. He had watched a lot of science fiction movies, but this was the first time he saw one for real.

His brain turned into mush as he watched the two lights.

What’s going on…? Are they shooting a movie?

He quickly discarded that thought as he saw no cameras nearby and nothing like wires to allow those two lights to fly around at such high speeds.

“Don’t tell me G.o.ds really exist in this world!” He couldn’t convey the profound emotions he felt in his heart even if he recited the moonlight poem(7) over and over again.

The clas.h.i.+ng between the two points of light became more intense, dozens of swords flying between them, attacking the red light from various different angles. The red light suddenly unleashed a fast and vicious attack, causing the swords to be stopped by some red smoke despite how fast they travelled. Each and every one of the sword softened after encountering the mist.

“What a strong that is!” The white dot yelled as it suddenly grew brighter. A large white magic circle spread out into the sky, making an ellipse with a diameter roughly equivalent to the length of two basketball courts. A pentagram with a large number of runes was created in the middle of the ellipse, the runes wiggling as if they were living.

Zhang Shaoyu opened his mouth wide till his jaw almost touched the ground. “Oh my Lady Gaga(8)! A magic circle!?”

“O Blade of Light, becometh the strongest sword, cut away the darkness before me! Sword of Light!” As the white dot completed her chant, bright light shone out from magic circle. The innumerable rays of light all moved at once, raining towards the red dot like a meteor shower.

The red dot dimmed, as if it had become weaker, but the white light streaks kept attacking it.

The red dot was truly in a desperate situation.

“Fufu!” the white dot smirked.“Now that you know how strong I am, hand over the Sacred Blood Stone. I will let you go if you do. This is your last chance!”

“I finally managed to obtain this! Even if I were to die, I wouldn’t give it to you!” Despite being weakened, the red light replied stubbornly.

“Alright then! You’re just an evil spirit anyway, killing one of you would only bring good!”

The white dot yelled loudly, manipulating the brightly s.h.i.+ning magic circle behind her. From it, countless blades of light surrounded the red spot from all directions, which were impossible to avoid.

Even though Zhang Shaoyu could not understand the situation clearly, the red dot’s tenacity despite being overwhelmed by the white dot’s aggressiveness, in addition to being in such a dire situation made him feel that the red dot truly had spirit.

For no apparent reason, he suddenly recalled Wu Shao and Ma Li’s figures. He felt a sudden surge of emotion rising up within him. He empathized with the red dot and out of nowhere, he felt sudden courage to shout.

“Red! You can’t lose!”

But Zhang Shaoyu did not expect that single sentence to change his whole life.

The red dot heard Zhang Shaoyu’s yell as she was completely surrounded. She glanced at him and saw him on the balcony, cheering for her. Waving her right hand towards him, a dark sphere no bigger that the size of a thumb flew straight at Zhang Shaoyu.

However, since it was too dark, Zhang Shaoyu didn’t see the flying object. And because he was yelling, his mouth was opened wide. By pure chance, the object went straight into his mouth
and Zhang Shaoyu was unable to react fast enough. It went down his throat so fast that he couldn’t even taste it. But one thing was for sure though, he felt like something like a small ginseng had entered his stomach as he swallowed with a ‘gulp’.

“Huh? What was that? Did I just swallow something?”

Zhang Shaoyu, who was still unable to comprehend the situation, heard a loud ‘Boom!’ as the red dot was completely engulfed in white light. The flurry of explosions blew up such a gale that he flew backwards onto the living room couch, and was knocked unconscious.

After the loud explosion, people in the surrounding area turned on their lights and peeked out of their windows to look at the sky. However, they didn’t see the white and red light because they disappeared as soon as the explosion took place. Soon after, people could be heard talking.

“Where’s the explosion? Where’s the fire?”

“What was that loud sound! I’m still having my ‘sweet moment’ here!”

“Did someone get r*ped? I want to see a live AV!”

“You idiot, how would that produce an explosion! You sc.u.m!”

The noise continued for a while, and as they came out to look around and found nothing, they soon went back to their room, turned off the lights and went back to sleep.

In a secluded back alley, a wounded girl was struggling to stand up. She wrinkled her nose and rubbed her behind, muttering, “Ouch…It hurts so much… Who would ever guess that someone from Britain’s Holy Church would come all the way here… Can’t even relax a bit. Just one piece of a Sacred Blood Stone and they were fighting so hard for it… Even though they just need to wait for a hundred million years for one, they can’t wait! Hmph, so stingy!”

She probably didn’t realize that normal humans can’t wait a hundred million years.

The girl’s right hand was suddenly bathed in a red glow, and as she swung it sideways, her wounds healed immediately.

“That boy just now… I must find him quickly now, my Sacred Blood Stone is still with him!“ With that, she disappeared into the darkness of the back alley.

TRANSLATOR’S NOTES :

1. Literally “South River High School”
2. Also known as Huang Da Xian, who is a Chinese deity whose name roughly translates as ‘Great Immortal Wong’.
3. ‘To wear a green hat’ 戴绿帽子 is a phrase that means to be cuckolded. Its origins are debatable, but one version tells of a wife who made a green hat for her husband, so that when the man she was having an affair with sees him leaving with it on, he’d know that her husband wouldn’t be returning that night.
4. ‘Money makes the world go around’ 有钱使得磨推鬼is usually written as有钱能使鬼推磨, which translates as ‘money can make the devil push the millstone’ meaning that with money, you can do anything. There’s a further play on words here where the position of 磨 (mill) and 鬼 (devil) are switched, making it literally translate as ‘money can make the millstone push the devil’
5. ‘Qian JinXin’ is written as 钱金鑫,and the character for money is 钱 (qian), while the character for gold is 金 (jin). As you can see, the headmaster’s name has both these characters in it, and the third character is written with three 金.
6. Those flying things that Doraemon uses.
7. A very popular poem for the chinese. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quiet_Night_Thought a.n.a.logous to some sort of counting numbers to keep calm.
8. A GREAT pun on ‘oh my G.o.d’. And yes it’s written like that. In English.