Nicococo!! Chapter 3

DURARARA!! NICONICO SPECIAL EDITION PART 3: NICOCOCO!!X3
Ikebukuro - Business District
It was the same business as usual today for the town of Ikebukuro.
It was just pa.s.sed 7:00 p.m. Whether it was salarymen returning from work, or
students having fun long after school, or maybe those people wearing those strange
clothes and you’re really not sure what they’re up to, various kinds of people were
bustling around, each going about their own Ikebukuro life.
Everyone on the streets all had their own individual emotions written across their faces,
from the cheerful laugh to the tired sigh of the worker, it all came together to make up the
usual atmosphere of the town.
All except for one.
That exception was straddling a black bike with no headlights or license plate was a
suspicious looking shadow——That is, the “Headless Rider,” who was hanging around
with a handy cam gripped in her hand.
“Oh, if it isn’t Celty. What are you doing?” From out of the darkness, a voice called
the wandering Headless Rider, Celty Sturluson, to a stop. The voice belonged to a
longtime friend of hers, Heiwajima s.h.i.+zuo.
He was certainly a conspicuous figure, walking around in his bartender outfit, but he
was nothing compared to Celty. s.h.i.+zuo had just finished work and was on his way home
when he happened to spy her sneaking around behind a telephone pole and called out to
her.
“A-ah…S-s.h.i.+zuo. It’s been a while.”
“Yo. What’s that, you’re holding a video camera. Doing work?”
“No……it’s like, a hobby or something…Just, thought I’d look for something
amusing or strange to shoot…”
“Something strange?” Hearing such words from Celty, who was a strange
phenomenon in and of herself, s.h.i.+zuo looked puzzled.
“Uuum, I need to make a video to post on Niconico Douga, but I haven’t really
had any good chances.”
“What? What the h.e.l.l is a Niconico Douga?”
“…Uh, well, it’s an online site where you post videos, and people comment on
it and share it and stuff…” s.h.i.+zuo wasn’t really interested with anything to do with the
internet, so Celty tried to keep her explanation to the basics. She thought it would be
useless to try and explain in depth, but this explanation seemed to work.
“Aaah…so it’s an online thing.” s.h.i.+zuo let out a sigh and pulled a face as he continued.
“I’m not really suited for online stuff. There’s no one in front of me I can get mad at
and beat up, so I ended up destroying everything around me instead.”
“….I see. Then, yeah, it’s better if you don’t use it.”
——He really does have no patience or ability to ignore things does he.
Although she thought it, Celty would never say that out loud, so she turned the
conversation back to her original purpose.
“Well, at any rate, I guess I won’t be able to make an interesting movie that
attracts everyone’s interest after all. Sometimes I see street performers or some
people acting strangely, but it’s creepy if I take a video without permission… I
think it’ll only be possible if some pink elephants and white crocodiles come
dancing down the street after escaping from a circus. Hahahahahahahah.”
“You’re, in an unusually bad mood.”
“I, I guess.”
“In the first place, those kind of strange events don’t simply show up that often.”
s.h.i.+zuo said in disgust, as he took a swig of the canned juice in his hand.
“Well, that’s true but still…” From behind Celty, who was still watching the events of
the town while holding her video camera, s.h.i.+zuo began to crush the can he had finished
drinking with his finger.
“I think it’s better when nothing’s happening. Taking a video of a peaceful town and
then getting that feeling of calm that comes from watching it is the best, isn’t it.” As he
spoke, he carefully smoothed out the steel can with only the power of his finger.
“Well…I agree it would be best if I could upload something like that to Niconico
but…Peaceful things really are great. But people really want to see videos of
others showing off their c that not everybody has…”
“Special skills, huh.” As the conversation went on, s.h.i.+zuo continued to manipulate the
steel can in his hands. He easily crushed the hard bottom as though it was clay, and, fed
up with it, folded it all up.
“If that’s the case, then just walking around won’t really work, yeah? I mean, I’m just
saying, don’t you think you should turn your camera to a more clear and concrete
purpose?”
Finally, due to s.h.i.+zuo’s super human strength, the steel can was compressed into a
tiny, dice like cube. The dense level of compression exceeded that of a vice, and was
enough to make someone think that the metal sides had actually been soldered together.
“That’s a good idea…Especially since people with amazing, special skills don’t
show up very often.”
“Yeah, that’s true. Well, I don’t know why you’re making that movie, but good luck.”
As he said that, s.h.i.+zuo tossed the little cube into a nearby metal recycling bin. Listening
to the sound it made hitting the sides of the bin, s.h.i.+zuo turned back onto his road home.
——It’s just as s.h.i.+zuo says.
——After all, if it was easy to make a movie, people wouldn’t work so hard at it.
Letting out a deep sigh in her mind, Celty put her camera away and returned to her
motorcycle she had stopped nearby.
She paid no attention to the result of that man’s superhuman strength that was rolling
around in the nearby recycling bin.
 ♂♀
“Ah! It’s Headless Rider-san! Yahoo~!”
“……”
Several minutes later, as Celty had driven slowly through the town, she spotted a pair
of twin girls she recognized, and the one with gla.s.ses had flagged her down.
“Uum…you’re Izaya’s sisters, right...”
“I’m Mairu! This is Kuru-nee!”
“……”
There was the lively sister, Orihara Mairu, and her opposite, who just silently did a
quick bow of her head, Orihara Kururi.
“Whaat~? What are you doing~? Work?”
“No, nothing like that…ah, that’s right, this is good timing.” Although she had only
been peripherally connected to these two by fate before, Celty was desperate and decided
to try and consult them.
“I think this is a bit sudden to ask…but do you know Niconico Douga?”
“Yup, we do!”
“Can you tell me what kind of videos you like?” After all, these two were high
school girls. While she didn’t know what ratio of Niconico users were high school girls,
she thought it might be useful to hear the preferences of a young person, and she could
listen without taking it too seriously.
“p.o.r.n!”
“…Eh?”
“And videos of girls dancing around half-naked going ‘nukyaa nukyaa~’!”
“This is the first time I’ve ever heard of someone saying ‘nukyaa nukyaa~’…”
Celty was clearly fl.u.s.tered, not knowing if this was a good answer or not, but Mairu
continued to talk.
“I’ve made one before too, with Kuru-nee, y’know? The two of us dancing.”
“I see.”
It’s true that the two were pretty, and combined with the novelty of twins, the video
would surely be popular if they danced well. Thinking that, Celty decided to try and ask
how many views it got. But Mairu finished her story before she could.
“But you know, it got deleted.”
“Eh?”
“Apparently it was in violation of the Terms of Service, something about【s.e.xual,
obscene, and violent acts, or acts that cause extreme discomfort to others.】”
“High school girls shouldn’t be making videos that violate the kind of rule! No,
no matter what age you are you shouldn’t do that!” Seeing Celty so extremely
fl.u.s.tered, Mairu gave a loud laugh as she spoke.
“It’s fine, it’s fine! It wasn’t like it was a matter for the police or anything…just
barely.”
“That’s not a good thing!”
“It’s really fine though. It’s not like we were stark naked~. What got us was that Kurunee’s
dance was just too erotic. Even I started to drool at the pa.s.sion Kuru-nee put into
her dance.”
“Enough already. I’m sorry. I don’t want to hear any more dreadful things.”
——Geez, they really are Izaya’s sisters aren’t they…
After parting from the twins, Celty once again began to aimlessly wander the town.
——But, maybe that’s how all the kids feel these days?
——I don’t really have any acquaintances among young people recently.
——Well, I want to capture the hearts of ordinary people too, not just young people.
——I’m going to have to try to ask more people for their opinions.
 ♂♀
Russia Sus.h.i.+
“Movie? Good timing, you should make a propaganda movie for our store.” Hearing
what Dennis, the owner of Russia Sus.h.i.+, had to say, Celty broke out in a cold sweat and
was lost for words.
As though he heard what had been said, Simon suddenly appeared, holding a plate of
sus.h.i.+ and dancing in front of Celty’s camera.
“He~y! Russia Sus.h.i.+ good! Fill up all your dreams! Eel, toro, crab, sea urchin, salmon
roe, kohada, sea ba.s.s, salmon, we have all! Eating sus.h.i.+ good, yes? Get thin by eating
only sus.h.i.+. Sus.h.i.+ diet! Eating sus.h.i.+ very popular, yes? When you win lottery or find
employment, this is the happiest paradise to come to. Russia Sus.h.i.+ is the best sus.h.i.+,
number one coast-to-coast with super epic sus.h.i.+!”
As Simon continued to give his nonsensical sales speech while dancing in front of the
camera, Celty gave a deep sigh and turned her smart phone screen to the shop owner.
“No…it’s forbidden to post goods and services advertis.e.m.e.nts on Niconico
without permission from the managing company.” At those words, Dennis glanced at
Celty while sharpening his knife and said,
“I see…then I’ll leave it to you to get permission.”
“Stop talking nonsense!”
 ♂♀
Russia Sus.h.i.+ - Back Entrance
Celty had just bid good-bye to Dennis and Simon when she unexpectedly ran into an
acquaintance in the back Russia Sus.h.i.+ who had come to get an order of crab and decided
to ask him for his opinion.
“Um, Niconico Douga, well, do you know anything about it?”
His name was Akabayas.h.i.+. He was a high ranking member of the Awakusu-Kai, the
group that claimed Ikebukuro as their turf, and a man who worked in the city’s
underworld.
“Due to certain circ.u.mstances, I have to make a video that will get a lot of
views…but I don’t really know what kind of video to make…”
“I see. Well, if you’re fine with an old man’s opinion, I may have something that will
get a lot of views.”
“!! Really!?” Celty jumped on Akabayas.h.i.+’s unexpected response.
“Yeah, it’s a secret video, one that has not been shown to the general public. The only
copy is on my phone.”
“That’s, what on earth…”
“…If I tell you, there’s no going back, got it?”
“Eh!”
Akabayas.h.i.+ continued to speak in undertones to a perplexed Celty.
“At any rate, it’s a video that deals with the management of my organization. So you
must be prepared for it to come to mortal combat if you release it to the public.”
“That’s a little…”
“There are many different kinds of videos in this world. There are even weirdos who
want to see snuff videos, and are willing to pay money for it, so I have colleagues who
are making those kinds of films. Of course it’s not faked, and it actually is 120 minutes of
uncut snuff film.” Ignoring the suddenly frozen Celty, Akabayas.h.i.+ continued on.
“So when people ask me, ‘Do you have any interesting videos’ and such…of course,
they are people who want to see a video that’s different from the mask the world puts
on...But if you upload it to Niconico, you’ll get to see an interesting mix of the public
world and the underworld…It’s a bit risky but…Well, what do you think of that?”
“S-sorry, I just remembered something I have to do!”
“I wonder if I was I a bit too threatening.” After bidding goodbye to Celty, who fled to
escape, Akabayas.h.i.+ replayed the video on his cellphone.
“Well, it’s just a video of a guy who tried to rough up one of the shop girls in our
territory getting beaten up and then prostrating himself naked on the ground.”
 ♂♀
A Certain Place in Ikebukuro
“A…video?” While fleeing home in a panic, Celty unexpectedly encountered
Sonohara Anri, who was on her way home from school and called out to Celty.
“I’ve never made one before…ah, but I did receive one once.”
“Really?”
“Yes, a really cute cat video…Mika-chan, who you once took care of at your
apartment, took a video of a cat and sent it to me.” Taking out her cellphone, Anri
naturally opened up the video and showed Celty. It was only a flip phone so the size
wasn’t good, but you could still see the cute little kitten with its folded ears.
“Ooh, this, I want to make a video like this!”
If it comes down to it, perhaps I should borrow this video and upload it instead?
Celty was slowly being driven up the wall, and had reached the conclusion she should
leave it to someone else but––
——……
As the video played, Celty erased that strategy from her head. Because as the camera
zoomed out, the place where the kitten was playing also became clear. The round
swelling Celty had thought was part of a cus.h.i.+on was actually the top of Anri’s body.
Celty knew Anri was well-endowed, but it was amazing that the kitten could play on top
of her b.r.e.a.s.t.s and not fall down, even with them shaking.
“Ah, yeah…thanks. I’ll use it as a reference.” Celty thanked her as she returned the
video, before going on her way.
 ♂♀
As Celty rode her bike, she thought about her options.
——So Izaya’s sisters have that kind of side to them too.
——And I really can’t expose Anri-chan to such public humiliation
After thinking about that, she looked back on her day today.
——…In the end, I feel like I haven’t gotten any good consults outside of s.h.i.+zuo’s
encouragement…
——Yeah, definitely only that.
——I’m going to make a video only I can make!
As Celty decided that, she pulled her bike over on the shoulder. Pulling out the handy
cam, she pressed the record b.u.t.ton and fixed it in front of the bike, by all rights where the
headlight should have been, with her ‘shadow’.
Revving the engine with the sound like a horse whinnying, Celty stroked the seat
lovingly.
——Hang in there Shooter. It’s only for a few moments.
——Still, it’s a good idea if I do say so myself.
——I should have done an on-board bike camera recording from the beginning…
——About halfway, I’ll use my ‘shadows’ to make a road and take flight
By making a road out of her own shadows, she could drive off the ground in the sky. It
sounded like an unimaginable thing to do, but Celty had done it and flown in the sky
many times in the past.
——It will be a very mysterious video.
——Afterwards, so that I don’t get found out I’ll add some suitable effects, t.i.tle it
“Ikebekuro Night Right Flying With Special Effects”, and upload it. It’s perfect!
——Fufufu…I wonder what tags would be good to use. Since I’m pretending its
special effects, maybe I should put it in the Niconico Technology Section tag…
——Or maybe the Strange Technique tag.
——I could even put a Peter Pan picture book on the Niconico Market
——It’s perfect. It’s the perfect plan!
Even as she remembered the many times she had over-confidently calculated, she
straddled the bike br.i.m.m.i.n.g with confidence but––
“Yo.” From the side she heard a familiar voice.
——……
With awful chills running up and down her spine, Celty slowly turned to face the
direction the voice came from.
“What are you planning, attaching a video camera to your bike like that? Have you
started some sort of street view type part time job?”
Almost symmetric with Celty’s black back was a large white bike. Of course, naturally,
the man straddling it was a member of the motorcycle police. Specifically, a member of
the Police Headquarters Traffic Riot Squad, named Kuzuhara Kinnosuke.
Her whole body stiffening with creak, Celty reached her shadows forward and pushed
the camera’s light b.u.t.ton. Then, facing her natural enemy in the motorcycle police, she
slowly showed him her smartphone screen.
“…It’s a headlight.”
“……”
“……”
Inside Celty’s mind, she was forcing the most insincere smile ever––
“…You’re not going to stick to that, are you?”
“…Yes.”
The next instant, the black bike shot away into the dark like a rabbit.
 ♂♀
s.h.i.+nra’s Apartment
“Wow, what an amazing video~! It’s got a sense of tension to it.” Kis.h.i.+tani s.h.i.+nra
raised his voice in admiration as he watched the output from the handy cam on the
television.
It was taken from the point of view from a bike being chased by the motorcycle police
riot squad in all the directions, the town of Ikebukuro flying by and disappearing at great
speed.
“The only problem is that you can’t really tell what’s going on and if you stare at it too
much it feels like you’re drunk. But still, if you add some effects you’ll definitely get
some MyList bookmarks.”
“Whatever…Ah, I’ve had enough of this town…” Celty was completely finished
after two hours of running away from the police, and she punched her words into her
smartphone while collapsing face down on the sofa.
“Worst of all…I can’t even smile while watching that video…” And so, Celty’s
wonderful plan was smashed into smithereens, and the movie was shelved without ever
being shown——
But there was one thing she still didn’t know.
At one point during the eventful chase, a friend of Karisawa’s rival, Blizzard la
Blizzadia, had happened to record and uploaded it to Niconico Douga.
With the simple t.i.tle of【Headless Rider VS Motorcycle Police】it had already
reached #7 in the site wide rankings of all categories.
When she did become aware that she had unwittingly a.s.sisted the enemy, she became
despondent and her spirit withered––
But that’s a story for another time.
To be continued in Nicococo!!x4