The Riches of Bunyan Part 17

But when I had been long vexed with this fear, and was scarce able to take one step more, these words broke in upon my mind: "Compel them to come in, that my house may he filled; and yet there is room." These words, but especially these, "and yet there is room,"

were sweet words to me; for truly I thought that by them I saw there was place enough in heaven for me, and moreover, that when the Lord Jesus spake these words, he did then think of me; and that he knowing that the time would come that I should be afflicted with fear that there was no place left for me in his bosom, did before speak this word and leave it upon record, that I might find help thereby against this vile temptation.

How lovely now in my eyes were all those that I thought to be converted men and women. They shone, they walked like a people that carried the broad seal of heaven about them. Oh, I saw the lot was fallen to them in pleasant places, and they had a goodly heritage.

But that which made me sick, was that of Christ in Mark 3:13, "He went up into a mountain, and called unto him whom he would; and they came unto him." This scripture made me faint and fear, yet it kindled fire in my soul. That which made me fear was this, lest Christ should have no liking to me; for he called "whom he would."

But Oh, the glory that I saw in that condition did still so engage my heart, that I could seldom read of any that Christ did call; but I presently wished, "Would I had been in their clothes; would I had been born Peter; would I had been born John; or would I had been by and had heard him when he called them, how would I have cried, 'O Lord, call me also.'" But Oh, I feared he would not call me.

FEARS ABOUT ELECTION

Before thou canst know whether thou art elected, thou must believe in Jesus Christ so really, that by thy faith there shall be life begotten in thy soul--life from the condemning of the law; life from the guilt of sin; life over its filth; life also to walk with G.o.d in his Son and ways; the life of love to G.o.d the Father, to Jesus Christ his Son, to his saints, and to his ways, because they are holy, harmless, and altogether contrary to iniquity.

YOUNG CONVERTS

In young converts, hope and distrust, or a degree of despair, do work and answer one another as doth the noise of the balance of the watch in the pocket. Life and death is always the motion of the mind then; and this noise continues until faith is stronger grown, and until the soul is better acquainted with the methods and ways of G.o.d with a sinner. Yea, was but a carnal man in a convert's heart, and could see, he should discern these two, to wit, hope and fear, to have a continual motion in the soul--wrestling and opposing one another as do light and darkness, in striving for the victory.

And hence it is that you find such people so fickle and uncertain in their spirits; now on the mount, then in the valleys; now in the suns.h.i.+ne, then in the shade; now warm, then frozen; now bonny and blithe, then in a moment pensive and sad, as thinking of a portion nowhere but in h.e.l.l.

In the general, all the days of our pilgrimage here are evil; yea, every day has a sufficiency of evil in it to destroy the best saint that breatheth, were it not for the grace of G.o.d. But there are also particular specious times, times more eminently dangerous and hazardous unto saints. As,

1. There are their young days, the days of their youth and childhood in grace. This day is usually attended with much evil towards him or them that are asking the way to Zion with their faces thitherward.

Now the devil has lost a sinner; there is a captive has broke prison, and one run away from his master; now h.e.l.l seems to be awakened from sleep; the devils are come out, they roar, and roaring they seek to recover their runaway; they tempt him, threaten him, flatter him, stigmatize him, throw dust in his eyes, poison him with errors, spoil him while he is upon the potter's wheel; any thing to keep him from coming to Jesus Christ. And is not this a needy time?

Doth not such a one want abundance of grace? Is it not of absolute necessity that thou, if thou art the man thus beset, shouldst ply it at the throne of grace for mercy and grace to keep thee in such a time of need as this?

To want a spirit of prayer now, is as much as thy life is worth. Oh, therefore, you that know what I say, you that are broke loose from h.e.l.l, that are fled for refuge to lay hold on the hope set before you, and that do hear the lion roar after you, and that are kept awake with the continual voice of his c.h.i.n.king chain, cry as you fly; yea, the promise is, that they that come to G.o.d with weeping, with supplication, he will lead them.

Well, this is one needy time; now thy hedge is low, now thy branch is tender, now thou art but in the bud. Pray that thou be not marred in the potter's hand.

XII. THE CHRISTIAN DESCRIBED

HAPPINESS OF THE CHRISTIAN

O HOW happy is he who is not only a visible, but also an invisible saint! He shall not be blotted out the book of G.o.d's eternal grace and mercy.

DIGNITY OF THE CHRISTIAN

There are a generation of men in the world, that count themselves men of the largest capacities, when yet the greatest of their desires lift themselves no higher than to things below. If they can with their net of craft and policy encompa.s.s a bulky lump of earth, Oh, what a treasure have they engrossed to themselves!

Meanwhile, the man who comes to G.o.d by Christ, has laid siege to heaven, has found out the way to get into the city, and is resolved, in and by G.o.d's help, to make that his own. Earth is a drossy thing in this man's account; earthly greatness and splendors are but like vanis.h.i.+ng bubbles in this man's esteem. None but G.o.d as the end of his desires, none but Christ as the means to accomplish this his end, are things counted great by this man. No company now is acceptable to this man, but the Spirit of G.o.d, Christ, angels and saints, as fellow-heirs with himself. All other men and things, he deals with as strangers and pilgrims were wont to do. This man's mind soars higher than the eagle, or stork of the heavens. He is for musing about things that are above and their glory, and for thinking what shall come to pa.s.s hereafter.

Is it so, that coming to Christ is by the Father? Then this should teach us to set a high esteem upon them that are indeed coming to Jesus Christ, for the sake of him by virtue of whose grace they are made to come to Jesus Christ.

We see that when men, by the help of human abilities, do arrive at the knowledge of, and bring to pa.s.s that which, when done, is a wonder to the world, how he that did it is esteemed and commended.

Yea, how are his wits, parts, industry, and unweariedness in all, admired; and yet the man, as to this, is but of the world; and his work the effect of natural ability. The things also attained by him, end in vanity and vexation of spirit. Further, perhaps, in the pursuit of these his achievements, he sins against G.o.d, wastes his time vainly, and at long run loses his soul by neglecting of better things. Yet he is admired.

But, I say, if this man's parts, labor, diligence, and the like, will bring him to such esteem in the world, what esteem should we have of such a one that is, by the gift, promise, and power of G.o.d, coming to Jesus Christ?

1. This is the man with whom G.o.d is, in whom G.o.d works and walks--a man, whose motion is governed and steered by the mighty hand of G.o.d, and the effectual working of his power. Here is a man!

2. This man, by the power of G.o.d's might which worketh in him, is able to cast a whole world behind him, with all the l.u.s.ts and pleasures of it, and to charge through all the difficulties that men and devils can set against him. Here is a man!

3. This man is travelling "to mount Zion, the heavenly Jerusalem, the city of the living G.o.d; and to an innumerable company of angels, and the spirits of just men made perfect, to G.o.d the judge of all, and to Jesus." Here is a man!

4. This man can look upon death with comfort, can laugh at destruction when it cometh, and long to hear the sound of the last trump, and to see the Judge coming in the clouds of heaven. Here is a man, indeed!

We pa.s.s through a threefold state from nature to glory; the state of grace in this life, the state of felicity in paradise, and our state in glory after the resurrection.

They are all kings that go to that world, and so shall be proclaimed there. They shall also be crowned with crowns, and they shall wear crowns of life and glory, crowns of everlasting joy, crowns of loving-kindness.

The coming man, the man that comes to G.o.d by Christ, if his way, all his way thither were strewed with burning coals, would choose, G.o.d helping him, to tread that path rather than to have his portion with them that perish.

"The angel of the Lord encampeth about them that fear him, and delivereth them." This, therefore, is a glorious privilege of the men that fear the Lord. Alas, they are some of them so mean, that they are counted not worth taking notice of by the high ones of the world; but their betters do respect them: the angels of G.o.d count not themselves too good to attend on them, and camp about them to deliver them. This then is the man that hath his angel to wait on him, even he that feareth the Lord.

It is said, that when the church is "fair as the sun, and clear as the moon," she is "terrible as an army with banners." The presence of G.o.dly Samuel made the elders of Bethlehem tremble; yea, when Elisha was sought for by the king of Syria, he durst not engage him but with chariots and horses, a heavy host. G.o.dliness is a wonderful thing; it commandeth reverence, and the stooping of the spirit, even of the unG.o.dly ones.

G.o.dliness puts such a majesty and dread upon the professors of it, that their enemies are afraid of them; yea, even then when they rage against them, and lay heavy afflictions upon them. It is marvellous to see in what fear the unG.o.dly are, even of G.o.dly men and G.o.dliness; in that they stir up the mighty, make edicts against them, yea, and raise up armies, and what else can be imagined, to suppress them; while the persons thus opposed, if you consider them as to their state and capacity in this world, are the most inconsiderable--but as a dead dog or a flea. O, but they are clothed with G.o.dliness; the image and presence of G.o.d is upon them. This makes the beasts of this world afraid. "One of you shall chase a thousand."

The ornament and beauty of this lower world, next to G.o.d and his wonders, are the men that spangle and s.h.i.+ne in G.o.dliness.

THE FAMILY IN HEAVEN AND EARTH

"The whole family in heaven, and earth." The difference betwixt us and them is, not that we are really two, but one body in Christ, in divers places. True, we are below stairs, and they above; they in their holiday, and we in our working-day clothes; they in harbor, but we in the storm; they at rest, but we in the wilderness; they singing, as crowned with joy, we crying, as crowned with thorns. But we are all of one house, one family, and are all the children of one Father.

FEEBLENESS OF THE CHRISTIAN

Israel, as the child of G.o.d, is a pitiful thing of himself; one that is full of weaknesses, infirmities, and defects, should we speak nothing of his transgressions. He that is to be attended with so many mercies, absolutely necessary mercies, must needs be in himself a poor indigent creature. Should you see a child attended with so many engines to make him go, as the child of G.o.d is attended with mercies to make him stand, you would say, "What an infirm, decrepid, helpless thing is this!" Would you not say, "Such a one is not worth the keeping, and his father cannot look for any thing from him, but that he should live upon high charge and expense, as long as he liveth?" Why, this is the case. Israel is such a one, nay, a worse: he cannot live without tender mercy, without great mercy, without rich mercy, without manifold mercy. He cannot stand, if mercy doth not compa.s.s him round about, nor go, unless mercy follows him. Yea, if mercy that rejoiceth against judgment doth not continually flutter over him, the very moth will eat him up, the canker will consume him.

THE CHRISTIAN UNDER A SENSE OF GUILT--BUNYAN'S EXPERIENCE

I had no sooner began to recall to my mind my former experience of the goodness of G.o.d to my soul, but there came flocking into my mind an innumerable company of my sins and transgressions; amongst which these were at this time most to my affliction, namely, my deadness, dulness, and coldness in holy duties; my wanderings of heart, my wearisomeness in all good things, and my want of love to G.o.d, his ways, and his people, with this at the end of all: "Are these the fruits of Christianity? Are these the tokens of a blessed man?" Now, I sunk and fell in my spirit, and was giving up all for lost; but, as I was walking up and down in the house, as a man in a most woful state, that word of G.o.d took hold of my heart, "Ye are justified freely by his grace, through the redemption that is in Jesus Christ." But Oh, what a turn it made upon me.

Now was I as one awakened out of some troublesome sleep and dream; and listening to this heavenly sentence, I was as if I had heard it thus spoken to me: "Sinner, thou thinkest that, because of thy sins and infirmities, I cannot save thy soul; but behold, my Son is by me, and upon him I look, and not on thee, and shall deal with thee according as I am pleased with him." At this I was greatly enlightened in my mind, and made to understand that G.o.d could justify a sinner at any time; it was but his looking upon Christ, and imputing his benefits to us, and the work was forthwith done.

And as I was thus in a muse, that scripture also came with great power upon my spirit, "Not by works of righteousness that we have done, but according to his mercy he saved us." Now was I got on high; I saw myself within the arms of grace and mercy; and though I was before afraid to think of a dying hour, yet now I cried, "Let me die;" now death was lovely and beautiful in my sight, for I saw we should never live indeed till we reach the other world. Oh, methought, this life is but a slumber, in comparison of that above.

At this time also I saw more in these words, "heirs of G.o.d," than ever I shall be able to express while I live in this world. HEIRS OF G.o.d! G.o.d himself is the portion of the saints. This I saw and wondered at, but cannot tell you what I saw.

Sometimes I have been so loaded with my sins, that I could not tell where to rest nor what to do; and at such times I thought it would have taken away my senses; but G.o.d, through grace, hath so effectually applied the atonement of Jesus to my poor wounded, guilty conscience, and I have found such a sweet, solid, sober, heart-comforting peace, that it hath made me rejoice exceedingly; and I have for a time been in a strait and trouble, that I should love and honor him no more, the virtue of whose blood hath so comforted my soul.

My sins have at times appeared so great, that I have thought one of them as heinous as all the sins of all the men in the world. Reader, these things are not fancies, for I have smarted for this experience; yet the least believing view of the blood of Jesus hath made my guilt vanish to my astonishment, and delivered me into sweet and heavenly peace and joy in the Holy Ghost.

Sometimes when my heart hath been hard, slothful, blind, and senseless--which are sad frames for a poor Christian--then hath the precious blood of Christ softened, enlivened, quickened, and enlightened my soul.