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"Why? So you could kill him with your bare hands and go to jail? He wasn't worth it, Reese. He was nothing but a troublemaker and I knew I couldn't tell you or my father. Besides," she said, lowering her voice, fighting back her tears, "he wasn't your problem."
He took another step into the room. "You were mine, Leah. I loved you. I was going to marry you. Your problems were my problems. We would have worked things out."
"No, I had to leave. I felt dirty. Used. I felt unworthy. Don't you understand how difficult it is for me now, knowing that you know?"
"You should have told me. It would have changed nothing."
Leah turned away from him, trying to block whatever emotional reactions she was having to his words. Why couldn't he understand that she couldn't tell him? At the time she had felt battered, bruised and confused.
"Leah, please don't shut me out. I love you. I always have. I still do."
She turned back around, her eyes filled to capacity with tears. His admission of love was the last thing she wanted to hear, the last thing she wanted to know. Knowing he loved her and that he'd built this house for her was too much. "No, we can't go there, Reese. We can't go back. Too much has happened. After I left and went to California, I had a hard time dealing with things. If a man looked at me, I panicked. Finally, I knew I needed help and sought out professional a.s.sistance. With the aid of counselors and a very special support group, I began to see that I wasn't alone. There were other women who'd been violated like I had. And then there was Grace, the older woman who was kind enough to give me a place to stay in her home. She became the mother I had lost, the grandmother I'd never had and the friend that I needed. I've come a long way but I still have a long way to go."
"And we'll go there together. I love you too much to let you leave me a second time."
The sincerity in his words touched her and nervously she placed her lower lip between her teeth and met his gaze. He was being honest with her, leaving her no choice but to be completely honest with him, as well. "And I love you, too, Reese. Too much for you to get involved and waste your time with me. The love I knew you had for me is what helped me keep my sanity over the years. But each time I came home I knew that love was turning to hate and I had to learn how to get stronger without your love as a crutch because it wasn't there anymore and I couldn't pretend that it was."
She wiped the tears from her eyes before continuing. "I still haven't gotten over things to the point where I trust men. In fact, the thought of one ever touching me makes me ill. Even you. Knowing that, how can I even consider us picking up where we left off?"
"Like I said, we'll work through-"
"No, there's nothing to work through. In a few weeks I'm returning to California. I'm going to use the money I'm getting from Jocelyn to open a small restaurant there. My life, the one I do have, is in California. There's nothing for me here."
"I'm here, Leah," he said quietly. "The man who loves you."
She shook her head. "No, I can't take what you're offering. I can't and I won't."
Not giving him a chance to say anything else, she walked around him and out of the room.
Jocelyn replaced her cell phone in her purse and glanced over at Bas when he brought the car to a stop at the traffic light. "That was Reese. Things didn't go with Leah the way he'd hoped, but he's determined to help her through this."
Bas nodded. "He loves her very much."
"Always has. At one time I actually envied what they shared, it was so special. And I've always known that if there was one person who could get Leah to change her mind about leaving Newton Grove it was going to be Reese, just like I truly believe he's the one person who can heal her hurt."
"I'm going to have to agree with you on that."
Jocelyn had been waiting to hear from Reese, and with the phone call from him out of the way, she took the time to study her surroundings out the car's window. Lifting a brow, she glanced back over at Bas. "I thought we were headed back to town for lunch. Where are we going?"
He smiled although he couldn't take his eyes off the road to look over at her. "My place. I'm treating you to lunch."
Jocelyn blinked. "Your place? I thought you were staying at Sadie's Bed and Breakfast."
"I was, until Friday. While I was out riding around with Reese a few weeks ago, I saw this cabin on the outskirts of town and thought it would be a nice piece of investment property for the Steele Corporation. All of us like to get away every once in a while and we all love the mountains. Our parents own a cabin that we use occasionally, but this one is bigger."
"So you bought it? Just like that?"
He risked glancing over at her before returning his eyes to the road. Just for that instant he felt his heart slam hard in his chest. He did love her. He was no longer falling in love with her; he had fallen-and hard.
"Yes, just like that," he said, feeling like a man on top of the world. He would feel even better if the woman who held his affections felt the same way, but he knew that she didn't. But he had time to spare, and pretty soon she would see that Reese wasn't the only man on a mission to win over the woman he loved.
"So what's for lunch?" she asked.
"I thought I'd keep it simple and fix a couple of sandwiches. I haven't had a chance to do any real grocery shopping yet, but I do have stuff to make a nice sandwich."
"What kind of sandwich?"
When he brought the car to a stop in front of his cabin, he c.o.c.ked his head and shot her a smile that tilted the corners of his lips. "I hope you like peanut b.u.t.ter and jelly."
Jocelyn had to admit that the peanut b.u.t.ter and jelly sandwich and gla.s.s of iced tea were good. She hadn't eaten since breakfast so her hunger might have been what had made it so delicious. But then she thought of something else that was delicious, something she liked-Bas's kisses.
"What are you thinking about?"
"Oh." A blush stained her cheeks. She'd thought he was using the restroom. She hadn't known he'd returned and had been staring at her. "I-" She paused, wondering what she could say. "I was just thinking about Reese and Leah," she lied, figuring he would believe that.
"And the thought of them is what had you smiling?"
"Er...yeah," she said, compounding her lie. "I can remember happier times."
"Don't give up on them. The happier times will return."
"You think so?"
"Yes," he said without hesitation. "When two people love each other, things will work out for them."
She lifted a brow. "You sound like someone who knows."
He shook his head. "Trust me, I'm not, but I believe it, and I've seen it happen. Take my brother Chance and his wife, Kylie. They b.u.t.ted heads from the start, but finally they decided to give love a try and eventually got married. And I don't know two happier people."
Jocelyn nodded, glanced around. For a place that had been moved in to a mere three days ago, Bas's place looked lived in. The three-bedroom, two-bath two-story log cabin with cathedral ceilings, sat secluded on a stream with hardwood trees all around. It also had an extraordinary view of the mountains, a wood-burning fireplace and a covered porch with an outdoor hot tub.
"You still planning on going to that baby shower later?"
She turned, not knowing he had crossed the room and was standing so close. "No, I'm not in the mood," she said softly, barely realizing what she was saying. Being this close to Bas was as usual stirring her senses, all five of them.
There was the scent of him, strong and manly with a come-hither aroma that should be bottled. The sight of him, especially in his jeans, was provocative enough to make a woman's mouth water...And speaking of mouth, the taste of him from last night was still on her tongue. Even the peanut b.u.t.ter hadn't been able to eradicate it. Her taste buds were sensitive, tingling, antic.i.p.ating kissing him again. Just thinking about it was putting another sense to work-her hearing. She could hear the pounding of her heart against her chest.
And then there was the sense of touch, something she hadn't quite explored to the fullest when it came to him. A soft sigh escaped her lungs at the thought of touching him intimately, taking him in her hands, feeling him harden beneath her fingers.
"You're smiling again," he said, resting his hip against his kitchen counter. "Still thinking about Reese and Leah?"
Jocelyn chewed the inside of her cheek, wondering what his reaction would be if she told him what she'd really been thinking about. She swallowed, deciding not to chance it. So she told him something that wasn't a lie, but it wasn't the full truth, either. "I was thinking about this weekend."
Bas smiled. "Now isn't that a coincidence. So was I."
"And what was your favorite part?" she asked him, wondering if it was the same as hers.
He deliberately licked his lips and eased up closer to her. "I can't believe you have to ask me that, sweetheart," he said in a low voice.
Heat suddenly seemed to bubble up in Jocelyn's throat. The sight of his tongue was sending unflagging warmth all through her. "You enjoyed that, huh?"
"Most definitely," he whispered, leaning in closer to her.
Jocelyn breathed in, remembering the nights she hadn't been able to sleep because of thoughts of him, and she knew there was something she wanted to know.
Something she had had to know. to know.
Last night she had had an o.r.g.a.s.m standing up. She wondered how one felt lying down in a bed. A slow burn began building between her legs at the thought of finding out. And she knew she couldn't leave this cabin until she did.
A part of her knew that she and Bas would never be a real couple. His home was in North Carolina and hers was here. There was nothing to keep him in Newton Grove when it was time for him to leave. But there was something the two of them could share while he was here. It was something she had never shared with a man before. A hot and torrid love affair. It would all be in the name of fun. In the end there would be no hard feelings and no regrets.
She could do this. She wanted to do this. She needed needed to do this. to do this.
Bas had awakened feelings and urges within her that she'd never had to deal with before. Not only had he awakened them, he had stirred them up real good and hot. She knew if she wanted to take things to the next level it would be up to her to make the move. He probably a.s.sumed that if he made them, she would accuse him of moving too fast. Hadn't he told her about the problem with a.s.suming things?
Making the decision to take matters into her own hands, she smiled and pointed past him. "Have you used your fireplace yet?"
He glanced over his shoulder and then back at her. "No, why, are you cold?"
"No, I'm not cold." She sighed deeply. For G.o.d's sake, she told herself, don't lose your nerve now. Remember that article you read in Today's Black Woman Today's Black Woman? Sometimes it's up to you to let a man know what you want, Jocelyn Isabella Mason. She smiled, thinking that although she wasn't named after her father, together her initials spelled JIM.
"But I think a fire would be nice," she decided to say. She wanted this man and she intended to have him, for whatever time she could.
"Okay. Just make yourself comfortable."
"Thanks, I will," she said walking over to the sofa and taking a seat.
It didn't take Bas any time at all to get the fire started, mainly because one had already started to flame, right in his gut. He wasn't born yesterday. He could recognize seduction a mile away. But in this case it wasn't a mile away, it was right smack in his living room and sitting on his sofa.
He stood and turned around and the flame in his gut suddenly blazed. Jocelyn had her legs crossed in a way that made her skirt rise higher on her thighs. They were the same luscious thighs he had held on to tightly last night while tasting her.
He tried not to stare. He even tried to stop his body from getting hard, but it was no use. There were some things that a man couldn't control and a physical reaction to a beautiful and s.e.xy woman was one of them. Especially when he happened to be in love with that woman.
He met her gaze, saw the heat in her eyes and saw how she suddenly took her tongue and licked her lips. At that moment all he could think about was taking that tongue, sucking it into his own mouth and having his way with it. He then watched as she switched positions and recrossed her legs, giving him a quick view of her panties. They were white.
He growled low in his throat, not even aware he'd made the sound until a pleased smile touched her lips. "You're trying to tempt me, aren't you?" he asked.
Jocelyn sat back and smiled. "You think so?"
"Yes."
She laughed. "Sounds like you're a.s.suming things, Mr. Steele, and what's your position on people a.s.suming things?"
Positions. Now Now that that was something he didn't want to think about at the moment. But then maybe he did... was something he didn't want to think about at the moment. But then maybe he did...
He slowly crossed the room, not taking his eyes off her, and when he came to a stop in front of where she sat, he reached out for her arm and tugged her unresistingly to her feet, pressing her body to his and gazing deeply into her eyes. "But this time, I'm a.s.suming right."
Jocelyn s.h.i.+vered, feeling the thickness of him pressed against her center. Nice. Hard. Forged of steel. "If you're a.s.suming right, then what are you going to do about it?" she whispered.
His gaze remained locked on hers, and she was struck by pa.s.sion so intense it was hard for her to swallow. She watched as his eyes darkened. "Don't ask unless you really want to know, Jocelyn."
She sucked in a deep breath when she felt him harden even more against her belly. "I really want to know, and I'm asking," she said, pus.h.i.+ng her lower body even closer to his for a more intimate fit.
Now it was Bas who sucked in a deep breath. Bas whose arms wrapped around her tightly. Bas who leaned closer to make sure she saw the desire in his eyes. He moved in closer still and when his mouth was just inches from hers, he snaked out his tongue, slid it sensuously across her lower lip, then the upper one and watched her shudder in response.
"Well, since you really want to know...it's show time," he whispered huskily, before greedily taking her lips with his and picking her up into his arms.
Chapter 14.
Bas pulled his mouth from Jocelyn's the moment he placed her on the king-size bed, feeling the insistent throb of desire running rampant all through him.
He hadn't intended to move this fast so soon. He had wanted to give her a chance to get used to him, to accept the place he intended to claim in her life and the intense love he had for her, before they shared ecstasy together. But now fate had stepped in and the need to stamp his claim, brand her as his, was as elemental as breathing. But first, he needed just to hold her, to feel her close to his heart, the heart she now possessed.
"Come here for a second," he said softly, opening his arms to her. And when she slid across the bed to him, into his opened arms, he held her tight, enveloped her into his warmth. She laid her head on his chest, and he knew she could hear the fast beating of his heart, but what she didn't know was that it beat at that pace just for her.
Emotions were churning through him, emotions he'd never before felt for a woman, and now he understood what Chance had meant when he'd said falling in love with Kylie had been like being hit with a ton of bricks. It had happened so fast Chance hadn't been expecting it.
It has been the same for Bas. Love was the last thing he had been looking for when he'd arrived in Newton Grove, but the one thing he'd found with Jocelyn. There was one thing that couldn't be denied with the Steele men. When they found love they knew how to accept it and claim the woman as theirs. At least, it seemed it was that way for three of them. There was no telling how Donovan, who was slow to accept anything at face value and p.r.o.ne to be the most resisting of the four, would handle love once he found it.
Bas's attention was reclaimed when Jocelyn raised her head and smiled at him. Her smile triggered something deep within him. He had to touch her, feel her, taste her all over, have her naked beneath him and join her body intimately with his, make love to her until they were both out of their minds, crazy with need.
And he wanted her now.
He stripped and reached out and began removing her clothes, first her blouse and bra. When her chest was completely bare, the sight of her firm b.r.e.a.s.t.s quickened his pulse. He leaned forward, took them in his hands and stroked them, licked them, exhaled hot breath over the hardened dark tips.
And then his hands moved down her waist to remove her skirt while his brain could still function. And when she lay before him in nothing but a pair of white lace panties, he reached out and let his fingertips trace along the edge before touching her moist center. He heard her quick intake of breath, her quiet yet ragged moan. She caught hold of his shoulders as his fingers continued to stroke her with slow caresses. His fingers slipped beneath her panties to touch her intimately, stirring her scent, flaming her heat.
"Bas."
His name was a whispered groan. An earth-shattering moan. And when a purr of pleasure rippled from her throat, he leaned back to pull the sc.r.a.p of white lace down her legs. Her scent was intense and filled the air surrounding them. A shudder pa.s.sed through him, the need to mingle in her wet heat became overpowering. But first he wanted to reacquaint his tongue with her taste.
He leaned forward, reached for her hips and lifted her up gently toward his mouth. The moment his tongue entered her she screamed, but he ignored the sound as his tongue continued to push inside her, deep, and then he kissed her intimately, savoring her taste, needing to make love to her in this special and profound way again.
Jocelyn uttered an intense moan while her hips involuntarily rocked against Bas's mouth. No man had ever done this to her before him, and he was making her body crumble into a thousand pieces. She felt every bone in her body melt, and she was filled with intense heat. Her fingernails were digging into his shoulders but she couldn't help it. She was too delirious to do anything but moan in pleasure.