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Immi looked bewildered. 'Not being funny, Chrissie, but why should I have done? You knew Jenna'd had an affair, so her and Lee breaking up can hardly have come as a shock. It isn't exactly hot off the press, is it?'
'No... but...'
The pair joined the queue for the salad bar. 'So what would you care?' said Immi.
'It doesn't matter why, I just do, OK?'
'But why?'
Chrissie remained silent. She didn't want to answer that one.
Immi stopped. She stared at Chrissie, and Chrissie could almost see a cascade of pennies dropping. 'Oh my G.o.d. You and Lee. You and Lee? You and Lee! In Afghan. Oh my G.o.d, you and Lee.'
Chrissie held a hand up to stop Immi speculating any more, as their queue shuffled forwards. 'No! I mean, yes, we were out there together, but that was it. He was out in Helmand and I was in Bastion. Yes, our paths crossed once or twice, but that was it. Honest, Immi.'
'But you wanted more to happen?'
'No.'
Immi gave her a look which couldn't have said 'pull the other one' more clearly if she'd had it tattooed on her forehead.
'All right, yes I did, but it didn't. Really. Truly, Immi. You must believe me. He was married and I respected that.'
Around them the other soldiers stopped shuffling forwards to get their meal and began to openly eavesdrop on the developing row.
'So did you and he plan to go out to Afghan together?' Immi's eyes widened again. 'Of course you did!' she said triumphantly, as she made the connection. 'That's why you didn't want me to mention your posting last Christmas, in case anyone else managed to put two and two together.'
'No! No, Immi, it was just coincidence. When I saw him at Brize, I was as surprised as anyone.'
'Who was surprised?' Lee's voice stopped both of them in mid-flow.
Chrissie jumped, guiltily. 'Nothing.'
'Doesn't sound like nothing to me,' said Lee. His gaze flicked questioningly between the two women.
'No, it certainly isn't,' said Immi.
'Immi,' said Chrissie, a warning note in her voice.
But Immi took no notice. 'I was just about to say to Chrissie that, while everyone in the garrison was having a right go at Jenna for s.h.a.gging that REME guy, you and she were playing fast and loose out in Afghan. Well, I hope you're proud of yourselves.'
'What?' Lee looked gobsmacked. 'Me and Chrissie? s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g? Oh, get real, Immi. As if.' And the look on his face was the final straw.
Obviously, thought Chrissie, feeling her already damaged heart finally shatter into a million tiny shards, he finds the idea of s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g me utterly ridiculous and repellent. Stifling a cry she fled from the cookhouse, cannoning into soldiers as she fought against the incoming tide, half-blinded by tears.
'Now what have I said?' said Lee to Immi.
Immi gazed at Chrissie's fleeing back view before she switched her attention back to Lee. 'So you and she didn't...?'
'When? Immi, just how on earth do you think we got it together out there? s.h.i.+t, I spent most of my time on the front line.'
'I dunno.' She thought about her own love-life. 'But where there's a will there's a way.'
'Exactly. And I was happily married at least I thought I was,' he added bitterly. 'And Chrissie's got a boyfriend. I wasn't about to muscle in, when she was in a relations.h.i.+p. Just because my life was going s.h.i.+t-shaped, I wasn't going to screw up hers too.'
'What?' It was Immi's turn to be completely bewildered. 'Relations.h.i.+p? Who with?'
'That medic, Phil Johns.'
'Phil?' Just when Immi thought the day couldn't get any more surreal, it just did. 'Phil and Chrissie.' She started to giggle.
'Now what have I said?' Lee sounded annoyed.
'Oh come on, Lee, surely you know how unlikely that is?' She was actually shaking with laughter now.
'No.' Lee's irritation was starting to morph into anger. 'What's the joke? What have I said?'
'Phil's gay.'
'A poof?' Lee's eyes popped.
'I don't think that's very PC,' said Immi primly, her laughter gone, 'but yes, totally, 100 per cent, dyed in the wool... poof.'
'So he and Chrissie...?'
'Not for an instant.'
'So why's she so upset, like?'
Immi repeated Lee's words back to him: '"Me and Chrissie? s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g? Oh, get real, Immi. As if."' She gave Lee a significant look. 'If you ask me, Chrissie thought you'd rather s.h.a.g a gorilla than her. And as a result, I think you've just broken her heart.'
The colour drained from Lee's face. 'What have I done?' He began to head for the cookhouse door.
'Top floor, d.u.c.h.ess of Kent block,' Immi called after him. 'Room three hundred and ten.'
36.
The door was shut fast and Lee opened it with trepidation. As he did, he could hear m.u.f.fled hiccuping sobs. Quietly he shut the door behind him and tiptoed across the room, the square of carpet in the middle m.u.f.fling the sound of his boots, but Chrissie was crying so hard, he doubted she would hear anything anyway. All he could see was a little ball huddled under the duvet.
He sat down at the foot of the bed.
'B-b-b.u.g.g.e.r off, I-i-mmi,' came Chrissie's indistinct voice.
Lee stayed put.
'I s-s-said, b-b.u.g.g.e.r off!'
Still Lee didn't move.
The bed erupted as Chrissie, mad with grief and anger, threw back the duvet to lash out at her room-mate. Her mouth opened and shut and then she said, 'Lee!'
Her face was puffy, flushed and tear-stained, but Lee didn't think he'd seen anyone so lovely before.
'Chrissie-'
'Get out,' she screamed at him. 'Get out!'
'Chrissie-'
'Out!' she yelled again, and hauled the duvet back over her head.
Lee stood up and pulled the covers off her.
'Listen to me,' he yelled back, his face inches from hers.
Chrissie was so stunned her sobs ceased. She just lay there, staring up at him, huddled into a foetal position, the epitome of misery.
'Listen to me,' he repeated more gently. 'Chrissie, I had no idea you had feelings for me.'
Inelegantly Chrissie wiped her nose on the back of her hand and glared at Lee. 'Well, you've made it quite plain how you feel about me.'
Lee walked across the room, picked up a box of tissues from a nearby dressing table and brought back a handful of handkerchiefs to Chrissie. She s.n.a.t.c.hed them and blew her nose.
'You have no idea how I feel about you.' He glared back at Chrissie, daring her to contradict him. 'And shall I tell you why?' He sat down on her bed again.
Chrissie snorted. 'If you must.' She pulled herself into a sitting position, against her pillows.
'I backed off. I could see at least I thought I could see your heart was elsewhere. So I didn't want to complicate things for you.'
'Complicate what things?' she sneered.
'You and Phil.'
Chrissie's jaw slackened.
Lee held his hand up. 'Yes, I know all about Phil now, don't I? Immi's just put me straight.'
'Which is more than Phil wants anyone to do for him,' said Chrissie, sniffing and das.h.i.+ng away tears off her cheeks.
Lee smiled at her. 'That's more like it, bonny la.s.s. So that is why I got so cross when Immi accused us of getting it on in Bastion. Talk about unfair: s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g you which isn't the nicest way of putting things but hey was the one thing I'd wanted to do and hadn't been able to; and then I get blamed for it anyway.'
Chrissie gave a wan smile. 'You wanted to?'
'G.o.d, Chrissie, I spent half my waking hours thinking about you. Which was wrong of me, I'll admit, 'cos at the time I thought I was still happily married.' He shrugged. 'Well, we all make mistakes.'
'Said the hedgehog climbing off the hairbrush,' murmured Chrissie.
Lee chuckled. 'But then when I got injured and you and Phil were always together, I thought, well, I've missed me chance.'
'We just liked the same films.'
'Brief Encounter.'
'You remembered.'
'I've watched it.'
'Really?' She was impressed.
Lee nodded. 'Not really my style, like, and I didn't think much of the soundtrack.'
Chrissie laughed. 'No, I don't have you down as the cla.s.sical music type.'
'Is that what it was cla.s.sical music?'
'Rachmaninov.'
'Bless you.'
Chrissie giggled again. 'That's the name of the composer, silly.'
'So do you forgive me?' he asked. He leaned forwards a little and Chrissie saw something nestling in the V of his open combat jacket neck. She hooked the object out with her finger. It was Fred Bear, still on a chain round his neck.
'You've still got him.'
'He's the most important bit of kit I've got. I've been keeping him safe.'
'He didn't do a very good job, though, of keeping you safe, did he?'
'Who cares? That injury meant I got to see lots more of you than I would have. I think, all in all, your little bear did a cracking job.'
'I think,' said Chrissie, 'if you wanted to, you could see a lot more of me yet.'
'That goes without saying, now we're both back here.'
'Not that sort of seeing a lot more of me,' said Chrissie as she began to unb.u.t.ton her combat jacket.
'You mean...?'
'I most certainly do.' And she pulled Lee towards her and kissed him.