Fantasyland: Midnight Soul Part 31

"Why didn't you ask a servant where I was?" I inquired.

"Why didn't you come to our room like we agreed?" he fired back.

"We agreed on an a.s.signation, Noc, we didn't agree on a location."

This, at least, was true.

He tossed an arm out wide. "Have you been waitin' in here for me?"

No, guiltily I had not. I had been in that room somewhat avoiding him but doing it in order to brood and lick my wounds from dinner, which turned into me madly planning a variety of elaborate escapes I wouldn't be able to execute and losing track of time.

But mostly I was avoiding him, and I was doing this because he did simple things, like say two innocuous words, and doing such made warmth flood my belly.

"Well..." I said that word slowly and trailed off, attempting to find an inoffensive, slightly factual answer.

"f.u.c.king h.e.l.l," he muttered, prowling to the cord in the room and tugging on it. He then turned again to me and crossed his arms on his chest. "You gonna get your a.s.s over here and sit with me by the fire or are you gonna stand in front of that window until the cold coming through freezes you to death?"

"There's no need to be surly," I noted (although there was), s.h.i.+fting from the window (which was indeed cold) and moving his way where there were two chairs with a table between them angled toward a hearty fire.

"Frannie, I waited two hours for you."

G.o.ds, the guilt a.s.sailing me was going to make me bite my lip!

I managed not to do something so ridiculous and simply stopped in front of a chair, keeping my gaze on him.

I opened my mouth to say something flippant.

But, "I'm sorry, Noc, I've got much on my mind," came out instead.

Some of the ire in his face faded as me moved toward me.

I expected him to stop in front of his own chair but he was Noc. He didn't do the expected.

He did the affectionate.

This meant he stopped half a foot from me so I could smell his cologne, a fresh, spicy scent I quite liked, his head tilted down so his eyes could hold mine.

"This gig, you know, the one I'm tryin' to help you get used to?" he began.

I nodded.

"Part of it is bein' in a place where, when you got s.h.i.+t on your mind and you got someone who cares about you, they're there for you to unload it on," he explained.

"There are things I need to work through myself."

"I hear you, sweetheart, but from what happened at dinner, thinkin' that you might wanna stop doin' that for a while, unload your s.h.i.+t on me, someone who's thinking a whole lot clearer, and let me help you work through those things, maybe give you ideas of where you could go from here."

I drew in breath to calm the additional warmth that p.r.o.nouncement caused in my belly.

One could say that Antoine was many things, nearly all of them good, and part of those many things was that he was intelligent and he was strong.

However, he did not have that kind of strength. There was much he depended upon me to do. His upkeep, for one, as before he came to be committed only to me, he was a Fleuridian prost.i.tute. Decisions about our home, servants, travel, money matters were other matters he looked to me to see to. He had a good deal saved from his earnings when he'd plied his trade, something which he was in great demand to do. Earnings I'd demanded he keep saved for no one knew what the future would bring and I was capable of taking care of us both, this something he had no qualms about accepting.

Antoine had been sensitive. He'd been caring. He'd been decent and kind to all, not only me. He'd had a flippant sense of humor I relished. And he, like Noc, had a way of seeing deeper inside me than I'd wished (at first) for him to see.

And he was exceptional in bed (obviously).

But he was not that man. He was not Frey to my Finnie, Lahn to my Circe, Tor to my Cora, Apollo to my Madeleine.

He might listen to my problems, but then he'd ask, "So what do you intend to do, mon ange?"

He would never say, "This is what you should think about doing." And definitely never, "This is what you're going to do because this is what's best for you."

Living my life, I would never admit, even to myself, that I found making every decision-from the small to the grand-draining, and the very idea of living the whole of my life with that burden mine alone was exhausting.

To share a burden not simply with someone to listen to it, but to a.s.sist me in seeing past it, felt like a gift so precious, it outshone chests five times as large as the one I owned filled with Sjofn diamonds.

"Frannie," Noc called and I focused on his face.

"I had my plans," I blurted, "and now they're thwarted."

His expression grew understanding as he gently commanded, "Sit down, baby, I'll order some whiskey and tell you my idea."

He had an idea, and I a.s.sumed it was not aiding me in an intricate scheme to spirit Josette, Irene and I into the night taking us someplace no one would find us (until Frey found us, of course).

I sat.

Noc, bizarrely determined to carry on doing mundane things I suspected he had to do in his world but he didn't have to do in mine, went to the windows and drew the drapes. He then stirred the fire, added a couple of logs on it, and whilst doing this, ordered our whiskey from the servant who'd arrived.

I understood why he went about these efforts when the warm glow of the fire became a radiating blaze, taking away any chill, enveloping us in snug intimacy in a way neither of us would have to call for a servant (or in Noc's case, get up and do it himself) to add more fuel to the fire for some time.

The decanter of whiskey came quickly and the servant had barely laid the tray on the table between our chairs before Noc thanked him and started pouring.

"And close the door behind you, would you?" he called.

"Yes, sir." We heard murmured and the door clicked.

Noc handed me my cut crystal gla.s.s filled with two fingers of whiskey.

Quite a dose.

And it was a dose that made me wonder with even more curiosity about his idea.

"All right, Noc, you stated you had an idea, so perhaps you'll break the suspense and share," I prompted as he took a sip from his own gla.s.s.

I did the same as he lowered his and started speaking.

"Finnie and Frey have a few things they gotta sort out here before we take off, which I think is mostly her way of delaying 'cause she likes spending time with her mom," he declared.

"This doesn't exactly end the suspense," I replied when he shared no further.

He grinned at me. "What I'm sayin' is, we're probably gonna be around awhile and that while will take us until at least the time your brother leaves."

This meant five more days of being able to spend time with Noc.

I found it alarming just how much this pleased me.

Really, did I not adore my Antoine at all?

I fought s.h.i.+fting uncomfortably in my chair as Noc continued talking.

"And you've got another choice other than going with your brother or going with the queen," he said then promptly announced, "You can come with us."

I felt my body start in surprise at this offer.

"I-" I began.

"Givin' you this idea to think on, Frannie," he interrupted me to say. "Not make a decision right here and now."

I took a sip of whiskey to sort my thoughts.

After I'd swallowed, carefully, I shared, "Noc, this is a kind offer and I'm glad for it. But my plan of going across the Green Sea was not as foolhardy as people believe. There was a reason I made that choice and I did so even understanding the risks it brought. Josette chose to accompany me understanding those same risks."

"You wanna get away from anything that reminds you of your parents or Antoine."

I closed my mouth, astonished he'd guessed so accurately.

I opened it to say, "I've been to Bellebryn and I've been with Antoine. We took a holiday there once. He'd never been. He enjoyed it greatly."

"Babe-"

I spoke over him. "There was more to Josette and my adventure than eluding my past. I've deduced that it's likely on an adventure you're experiencing so many things, you can think of nothing but what you're experiencing."

"You can't escape your problems, sweetheart, or your emotions," he told me gently. "They got a way of not letting go."

He was undoubtedly right.

"Yes, but when other things are prevalent and they are that for a good period of time, those emotions have a way of fading away."

"You got me there," he muttered.

"In other words, I did know what I was doing, Noc, and now I don't. Now my options are limited. And although I'd enjoy spending time with my brother, meeting my niece or nephew when he or she arrives, something I did not know which I now have to take into account, I think both of us can agree the time is ripe for a variety of changes in my life. And I feel, the sooner I see to them will be the better."

"Come home with me."

I froze in my seat, my eyes locked on him.

Noc did not freeze.

He continued.

"Valentine says she'll take care of it all. And maybe we can give her some of the gold we got to bring us back if you get homesick. I can take a vacation, experience more of this world then. But now, or after your brother leaves, I won't go with Finnie and Frey and instead take you back to my world with me."

I sat mute and immobile, unable to take my eyes off him, but my mind was awhirl with hundreds of thoughts.

Maybe thousands.

But the one that repeatedly churned through the others was Noc's attractive voice saying the words, Come home with me.

"Frey already asked her," he carried on. "It's all set. You gotta get away, there's no further away than there, Frannie. And if you want an adventure to get your mind off s.h.i.+t, that'll be the biggest adventure you can have, there aren't any pirates and I'll be there to keep you safe."

I'll be there to keep you safe.

By the G.o.ddess, he must stop.

"Noc-" I began in an effort to make him do that.

He reached across the table between us, caught my hand that was resting on the arm of my chair and laced his fingers through mine.

He had very long fingers. Competent-looking. Most appealing.

b.l.o.o.d.y h.e.l.l.

"Don't decide on that right now either," he urged. "You got time to think about it. But, babe," he smiled and that was most appealing too. Always. "I'd love to show you my world. And you won't be alone there. You'll have Valentine. And Circe lives where we live too. She's already gone back and from what she's said, she can use a few friends who know her like we'd know her. You'll have people. You'll have resources. You'll be good. You'll be safe." His smile got wider. "And you'll be in New Orleans so you'll have good music, great f.u.c.king food and every opportunity to have a s.h.i.+t ton of fun."

I finally managed to string a thought together.

"I couldn't ask you not to take your adventure in order to give me mine."

"I get vacation days, toss a couple gold coins Valentine's way, I'm back and I'll get it."

"Noc, that's most kind but it'd be selfish of me even to consider."

"Happily give up my adventure for a different one, that bein' givin' you yours."

It appeared he was going to be difficult to dissuade.

Worse, as I was able to string together further thoughts, I was wondering why I would try.

I did manage to note, "There's Josette to consider. And my new maid, Irene."

"Don't know about this Irene, Frannie. Havin' a lady's maid isn't something people have in my world, much less having two. As for Josette, she's your girl and I'd get you'd want her with you. But she was willing to cross the Green Sea with you, don't think she'd back off from traveling to a parallel universe."

Troublingly, I suspected Josette would follow me straight to h.e.l.l if I guided her there. I treasured that loyalty even if I didn't know how I'd earned it.

A place with such fanciful things as motorcycles and phones, if she was right there in the room with us, she'd say yes for the both of us before I could utter another noise.

"Frannie, it's a good deal and you know it," Noc pressed. "Better than whatever you wanted to see on another continent in this world. h.e.l.l, you eat a bite you'll wonder why you didn't say yes before I finished making the offer when you have pizza."