Wings Of The Morning Part 30

"Of?"

"Of Dallas being there and not coming to see me. Of my realizing that his feelings might have changed when mine are stronger than ever."

Willa didn't believe for one minute that Dallas had changed his mind about Smokey, but she was not going to make any promises.

"It's not like you to be afraid of anything. You'll never find out the truth by sitting around here. Not to mention that Jenny is your friend and you've got a lovely little baby named after 253.

you that you've never even seen. If Iwere Jenny, whichl'mnot, I'd be a mite hurt by your indifference"

"I don't feel indifferent," Smokey protested.

"I know that, but Jenny doesn't."

This gave Smokey pause, and she realized she was being very selfish. Dallas was probably still at sea, leaving Tate and Jenny in the dark as to why their friend would stay away after all these weeks. In the morning Smokey packed her bag and asked Da.r.s.ey to take her to Kennebunkport.

Smokey stared down into the cradle at Victoria Jennifer Pemberton and wondered if she had ever seen anyone so tiny and sweet. Jenny lifted her tiny daughter and pa.s.sed her into Smokey's waiting arms. Smokey sat down on the edge of the settee and just stared into the tiny dark eyes that seemed to be gazing right at her.

"She's precious."

"We think so," Jenny said softly. The two friends smiled at each other.

After another look at Victoria's round face, Smokey's eyes skimmed down the front of her friend's dress and then twinkled with suppressed laughter.

"I can see you've traded fullness in one area for another."

Jenny really laughed at this and put her hand to her milk-swelled bosom. "I think I could have fed twins."

"So all I have to do to gain a fuller figure is become a mother."

"That's all," Jenny said with a nonchalant shrug, and the two women shared another laugh.

Smokey looked down at that point to see that Victoria had fallen asleep. She gently laid her back in the cradle. The women silently left the nursery. Neither one spoke until they were downstairs in the parlor.

254.

"You look wonderful, Smokey," Jenny told her sincerely.

Smokey's hand went self-consciously to her hair.

"I guess I should have explained."

"There is no need; Dallas was here."

"Dallas was here?" Smokey asked, trying to keep her voice light.

"Yes, and I'm sorry about everything you had to go through."

Jenny's eyes filled with tears.

"It's all right, Jen," Smokey told her. "I'm going to be all right." Smokey was not sure she believed her own words at the moment, but she was trying.

They fell silent for just a few moments, a silence that bordered on discomfort until Jenny's face lit.

"I have some good news--Buck and Greer are married!"

"Oh, Jenny!" Smokey exclaimed as she tried to put aside her feelings of loss. "That's wonderful! When did this happen?"

"Just a month ago. They wanted to wait until you were back, but they just didn't know when that would be."

"That's all right. I'll have to go and see them. How does Buck like living in Greer's house?"

"He doesn't; I mean, they live at Buck's. Greer loves it."

Smokey's whole frame tensed. "And Greer's house?"

"It's sold," Jenny told her softly, wanting to say more. She wished at the moment that she had never promised Dallas she would stay as quiet as possible about the sale.

Smokey nodded, her face full of calm acceptance. Jenny went on to fill her in on the goings-on of afew more folks, and then Victoria began to cry.

"I'll have to feed her," Jenny said. "You can stay if you like."

"Thanks, Jen, but I think I'll take a walk on the beach. I'll be back before supper."

The women went their separate ways then, but Smokey might have come back to the house if she could have seen Jenny in the second-story nursery window, tears pouring down her face, even as her baby fussed in her bed.

255.

"Please, Lord," she whispered against the gla.s.s, begging G.o.d with every fiber of her being, "Smokey has been through so much, and so has Dallas. Please help them to find each other and work things out very, very soon."

257.

it felt wonderful to SMOKEY to be able to stretch her legs and feel the sand beneath her shoes and the wind on her face as she prayed Her voice was carried away on the wind, but still heard by her heavenly Father.

"You just want it to be You and me, don't You, Lord? You didn't want me to have Dallas or the house. Help me to accept that. Help me to see that having You is enough."

Smokey stopped at that point and looked out to sea. It was a sight of which she never grew weary. For a time it had seemed that she would be giving up the sea and theAramis, but now she thought she'd best reconsider. Sailing was all she really knew how to do, and she was used to being her own boss.

"I want to face that pain of loss, Lord, and not just busy myself to avoid it, but I can't sit around "Willa's and be underfoot there. Show me if You have a new path. Show me where I can best be used"

The tears came then, not a torrent, but they did flow down her face as she mourned the loss of her dreams. Smokey went on asking G.o.d to give her new dreams, dreams to reach for and realize.

Although her heart was heavy, she felt much better after she cried For the moment she couldn't think about Dallas. He was not attainable, and she would only cry again if she allowed her mind to dwell on his face. Smokey was about to turn back 257.

to Jenny's when she glanced up the beach and saw Greer's house. Telling herself she wanted just one more look, Smokey moved toward it.

It really was the most spectacular home she'd ever seen.

She felt there was little point in telling the new owners to keep her in mind if they decided to sell--she'd probably be an old woman by then--but she was tempted to rap on their door anyway.

Smokey gazed at the house in wonder for some time before she realized a man had come outside and was looking down at her on the beach. It was Dallas! Smokey watched in frozen amazement as he took the cliff steps to the sand and walked toward her. She didn't move a muscle, not even when he stopped less than two feet in front of her.

Smokey's eyes met his and then flicked to the house.

Understanding dawned like a light out of the sky.

"You bought it," she said slowly.

"I bought it," Dallas agreed, his voice as deep and wonderful as she recalled Smokey took a deep breath and nodded Dallas' face gave nothing away, and Smokey summoned a smile.

"I'm glad, Dallas," she spoke sincerely "Buck told me a long time ago that you loved that house, and Greer told me she hoped whoever owned it after her would care for it the way she did"

Dallas simply didn't know what to reply, so he just stood quietly and gazed at the women he loved The silence was too much for Smokey.

"Are you all settled in?" Her voice sounded too cheerful, even to her own ears, but Dallas didn't seem to notice "I'm getting settled I have a few additions to make, but that may take some time. Would you like to come inside?"

Dallas asked, thinking that if she refused, he would follow her all the way back to Jenny's. Anything to be near her.

Smokey told herself that going in with him was the worst thing she could do, and at the same time nodded her head and began to follow him back up the steps.

258.

Even with slightly less furniture the house was as wonderful inside as she remembered Smokey noticed it was spotlessly clean, and every windowpane gleamed in the afternoon sun.

"It's a beautiful home, isn't it?"

"Beautiful," Dallas agreed with her. Smokey didn't notice that he never took his eyes from her face.

When she could find nothing else to gaze at, she let her eyes meet his and could not pull away. Dallas whispered to her from his place some ten feet away, but Smokey caught every word.

"I've missed you, Smokey."

Smokey drew in a shuddering breath on those words. If he missed her, why hadn't he come? When Smokey voiced the question, her voice was tight with anger. "Why didn't you come to Willa's?"

"I thought you needed time," he told her, his eyes so full of pain that the spark of anger that had ignited in Smokey was quickly snuffed out.

"G.o.d has asked me to trust Him many times over the years," Dallas went on, his voice still soft, his look intense.

"I've trusted Him when I thought the sea was going to take my s.h.i.+p down, and I trusted Him when it seemed that I would never gain the money for my company, but never has He asked for so much.

"I thought my insides were being torn in half, when I found that you'd been moved from the Tower. And then when I saw you in that courtroom, so pale and fragile, again I thought someone had thrust a knife into my side."

His words were heartbreaking to Smokey and she didn't think she could take much more. "You risked your life to bring Lord Lynne in. I'm sorry I didn't stay and thank you for all you did"

"It's all right. I understood. Brandon told me you were with Da.r.s.ey, and I was fine as long as I knew you were safe."

"Why did you think I needed time?" Smokey had to know.

"Because you'd been through so much. I didn't know if my 259.

presence would complicate things or help them. And I wanted to get things ready," he added Smokey looked a little confused and he went on.

"This is no pa.s.sing fling for me, Smokey. The night that Brandon's coachman came back to say Da.r.s.ey had been arrested was the night I planned to ask you to be my wife."

Smokey was utterly speechless as Dallas slowly covered the distance between them. When his hands held her upper arms, he went on.

"You did understand about the additions to this house, Smokey, didn't you? The first is you, as my wife, and then as G.o.d blesses, a bunch of little people who strongly resemble Dallas and Smokey Knight."

Smokey's eyes slid shut, and Dallas pulled her into his arms. Dallas loved herl G.o.d had given her all her dreams and more.

"I was in such pain when you didn't come." Smokey's voice was broken.

"I'm sorry. I thought it was the right thing, and I wanted this house, our house, to be so perfect."

He stopped speaking when Smokey moved and grasped the front of his s.h.i.+rt with both small fists.

"The house is wonderful, Dallas " she told him, her eyes pleading with him to understand "But it's you I wanted, only you. Outside of that, nothing you could give me would mean a thing." The tears came then, and Dallas wrapped her in his arms once again.

"I'm so sorry," Dallas whispered as she sobbed, "so very sorry. I'm here now, and you don't need to cry anymore."

His words did little. He led her to the parlor then, and to the sofa to sit beside him. It was some time before she let her head fall against his shoulder and tried to control her tears.

"You know," she heard him say, his voice gentle, "I may never want your hair long again."

Smokey raised her head "Do you mean that?"

"Of course. Why?"

262.

"I thought you would hate it," she wailed Dallas only laughed "I can't think of any hairstyle I would hate on you," Dallas told her, punctuating his words with a soft kiss. When he drew away, Smokey's eyes were thoughtful on his face.

"YouVe lost weight," she said as the backs of her fingers stroked his lean cheek.

"I haven't felt very hungry," Dallas admitted before hesitating and going on. "Was it awful?"

"Yes," Smokey told him without pause. "I know it could have been far worse, but it was the worst thing I've ever known. To keep us controlled, they fed us very little."

Now it was Dallas' turn to close his eyes. He wondered if he would ever forget the sight of Smokey's frail frame in that courtroom. From what Brandon told him afterward, he was almost relieved not to have seen the duel.

"You didn't answer my question," Dallas said when he had reined in his wild thoughts.

"You haven't asked a question," Smokey reminded him and then bit her lip when he slipped off the sofa, took her hand, and went down on one knee before her.

If Smokey had read such a scene in the pages of abook, she would have laughed There was no laughter in her right now, however. The man she loved was fixedly gazing at her, his eyes telling her in ways he could never verbally express how deeply she was loved "Will you marry me, Miss Simmons?"

"Yes, Mr. Knight, I will."

No other words were necessary for quite some time.