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How could she, when she and Ry were spending every free moment together? Every evening they settled into her apartment, ordered dinner-which more often than not had to be reheated after they'd feasted on each other.
She didn't think of work from the time he arrived on her doorstep until she rushed into her office the next morning.
She didn't think of anything but him.
Besotted was what she was, Natalie admitted as she stared out her office window. Fascinated by the man, and by what happened every time they got within arm's reach of each other.
It was crazy, of course. She knew it. But it was so wonderful at the moment, it didn't seem to matter.
And she could justify it, since she hadn't yet missed any meetings or business deadlines. Now that Ry had given her the go-ahead, she'd authorized the cleanup and redecorating at the flags.h.i.+p store.
The stock there was nearly all in place, and the window-dressing was complete.
It was only a matter of days before the grand opening, nationwide, and there'd been no more incidents. That was how she liked to think of the fires now. As incidents.
She should, of course, be making plans to visit all the branches within the next ten days. But the thought of traveling just then seemed so annoying, so depressing. So lonely.
She could delegate Melvin or Donald to make the tour. It wouldn't even be outside of proper business procedure to do so. But it wasn't her style to delegate what should be done by her.
Maybe, if things got settled somehow, Ry could get a few days off, go with her. It would be wonderful to have company-his company-on a quick business trip. She could put it off until after the grand opening, instead of before, and then-Turning away from the window, she answered the buzzer on her desk. "Yes, Maureen."
"Ms. Marks to see you, Ms. Fletcher."
"Thanks. Send her in." With an effort, Natalie s.h.i.+fted her personal thoughts to the back of her mind and welcomed her accounting executive. "Deirdre, have a seat."
"I'm sorry I'm so behind." Deirdre blew her choppy bangs out of her eyes before she dropped a thick stack of files on Natalie's desk.
"Every time we turn around, the system's down." Natalie frowned as she picked up the first file. "Have you called in the engineer?"
"He's practically living in my lap." Deirdre plopped into a chair and set one practical flat-heeled shoe on her knee. "He fixes it, we forge ahead, and it goes down again. Believe me, running figures has become a challenge."
"We've still got some time before the end of the quarter. I'll call the computer people myself this afternoon. If their equipment's unstable, they'll have to replace it. Immediately."
"Good luck," Deirdre said dryly. "The good news is, I was able to run a chart on the early catalog sales. I think you'll be pleased with the results."
"Mmm, hmm..." Natalie was already flipping through the files.
"Fortunately, the fires didn't destroy records. You'd have a real accounting nightmare on your hands if it had gotten to the files at the flags.h.i.+p."
"You're telling me." Deirdre rubbed her fingers over her eyes.
"The way the system's been hiccuping, I'd sweat bullets without those hard copies."
"Well, relax. I've got copies of the copies, as well as the backup disks, tucked away. I was hoping to run a full audit by the middle of March." She saw the wince before Deirdre could mask it. "But,"
she added, leaning back, "if we keep running into these glitches, we'll have to put it off until after the tax-season rush."
"My life for you." Solemnly, Deirdre thumped a fist on her breast.
"Now to the nitty-gritty. Your outlay is still within the projected parameters. Barely. With the insurance payments, we'll offset some of that."
Natalie nodded, and made herself focus on budgets and percentages.
A few hours later, in a seedy downtown motel, Clarence Jacoby sat on his sagging bed, lighting matches. His hands were pudgy, smooth as a girl's. Each time he would strike the match and watch the magic flare, waiting, waiting until the heat just kissed the tips of his fingers, before blowing it out.
The ashtray beside him was overflowing with the matches that had already flared and burned. Clarence could entertain himself for hours with nothing more.
I He thought nearly every night about burning down the hotel. It would be exciting to start the blaze right in his own room, watch it grow and spread. But he wouldn't be alone, and that stopped him.
Clarence didn't care overmuch about people, or the risk to their lives. He simply preferred to be alone with his fires.
He'd learned not to stay overlong after he'd ignited them. The rippling scars over his neck and chest were daily reminders of how quickly, how fiercely, the dragon could turn, even on one who loved it.
So he contented himself with merely conceiving the fire, basking for a regrettably short time in its heat, before fleeing.
Six months before, in Detroit, he'd torched an abandoned warehouse that the owner had no longer needed or wanted. It was the kind of favor, a profitable one on all sides, that Clarence enjoyed. He had stayed to watch that fire burn. Oh, he'd been out of the building and deep in the shadows. But they'd nearly caught him. Those cops and arson people scanned the crowds at the scene just for a face like his.
A wors.h.i.+pful face. A happy face.
With a giggle, Clarence struck another match. But he'd gotten away. And he'd learned another lesson. It wasn't smart to stay and watch. He didn't need to stay and watch. There were so many fires, so many fierce and beautiful blazes living in his mind and heart, he didn't need to stay.
He had only to close his eyes and see them. Feel them. Smell them.
He was humming to himself when the phone rang. His round, childlike face beamed happily when he heard the sound. Only one person had his number here. And that person would have only one reason to call.
It was time, he knew, to free the dragon again.
At his desk, Ry pored over lab reports. It was nearly seven, and already dark outside. He'd given up on cutting down on coffee, and drank it hot and black from a chipped mug.
He needed to quit for the day. He recognized the slow process of shutting down in his mind and body. Somehow or other, in the past couple of weeks, he'd gotten into a routine he was now beginning to depend on.
No, not somehow or other, Ry reminded himself, scrubbing his hands over his face. Someone.
He was getting much too used to knocking off for the day and heading for her apartment. He even had a key to her front door in his pocket now. Something that had been given and taken without ceremony. As if neither of them wanted to acknowledge what that simple piece of metal stood for.
They'd have a meal, he thought. They'd talk, maybe watch one of the old movies on television-something they'd discovered by accident they both loved.
Most of what they'd discovered about each other, he mused, had been by accident. Or by observation.
He knew she liked long bubble baths in the evening, with the water too hot and a gla.s.s of chilled wine sitting on the rim of the tub. She stepped out of those ankle-breakers she wore the minute she walked in the door. And she put everything away in its place.
She slept in silk and hogged the blankets. Her alarm went off at seven on the dot every morning, and if he wasn't quick enough to delay her, she was out of the bed seconds later.
She had a weakness for strawberry ice cream and big-band music.
She was loyal and smart and strong.
And he was in love with her.
Sitting back, Ry rested his eyes. A problem, he thought. His problem. They'd had an unspoken agreement going in, and he knew it. No ties, no tangles.
He didn't want them.
G.o.d knew he couldn't afford them with her.
They were opposites on every level but one. The physical needs that had brought them together, no matter how intense, couldn't override everything else. Not in the long term.
So there couldn't be a long term.