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He regained control of himself, wiping the spittle from his mouth. "Forgive me. I have known you since you were born. It is my duty to speak to you, even though it pains me."
"I will forgive you this time," she said. "But it is you who shame my father, through disrespect to his heir. If you ever speak to me in that fas.h.i.+on again, I will order you to slit your belly."
"You are only a woman," he said, trying to placate her but enraging her further. "You have no one to guide you."
"I have my husband," she said shortly. "There is nothing you or Lord Fujiwara can do to alter that. Go to him now and say my sisters are to come home at once. They will return with me to Maruyama."
He left immediately. Shocked and restless, she could not sit quietly and wait for his return. She called to Hiros.h.i.+ and showed him the house and garden while she checked all the repairs that she had had done in the autumn. The crested ibis in their summer plumage were feeding on the banks of the rice fields, and the shrike continued to scold them as they trespa.s.sed into its territory. Then she told him to fetch the chests of records and, carrying one each, they made their way upstream along the s.h.i.+rakawa to where it emerged from under the mountain. She would not hide them where Shoji might find them; she would entrust them to no human. She had decided to give them to the G.o.ddess.
The holy place calmed her, as always, but its ageless, sacred atmosphere awed her rather than lifted her spirits. Below the huge arch of the cave's entrance the river flowed slowly and steadily in deep pools of green water, belying its name, and the twisted shapes of the calcified rocks gleamed like mother-of-pearl in the half-light.
The old couple who maintained the shrine came out to greet her. Leaving Hiros.h.i.+ in the company of the man, Kaede went forward with his wife, each of them carrying one of the chests.
Lamps and candles had been lit inside the cavern, and the damp rock glistened. The roar of the river drowned out all other noise. They stepped carefully from stone to stone, past the giant mushroom, past the frozen waterfall, past Heaven's Stairway-all shapes made by the limy water-until they came to the rock shaped like the G.o.ddess, from which drops fell like tears of mother's milk.
Kaede said, "I must ask the G.o.ddess to protect these treasures for me. Unless I myself come for them, they must stay here with her forever."
The old woman nodded and bowed. Behind the rock a cave had been hollowed out, well above the highest level of the river. They climbed up to it and placed the chests in it. Kaede noticed that it contained many other objects that had been given to the G.o.ddess. She wondered about their history and what had happened to the women who had placed them there. There was a damp, ancient smell. Some of the objects were decaying; some had already rotted. Would the records of the Tribe rot away there, hidden under the mountain?
The air was cold and clammy, making her s.h.i.+ver. When she put the chest down, her arms felt suddenly empty and light. She was seized by the knowledge that the G.o.ddess knew her need-that her empty arms, her empty womb, would be filled.
She knelt before the rock and scooped up water from the pool that had gathered at its base. As she drank she prayed almost wordlessly. The water was as soft as milk.
The old woman, kneeling behind her, began to chant a prayer so ancient that Kaede did not recognize the words, but its meaning washed over her and mingled with her own longing. The rock shape had no eyes, no features, yet she felt the benign gaze of the G.o.ddess upon her. She remembered the vision she had had at Terayama and the words that had been spoken to her: Be patient; he will come for you Be patient; he will come for you.
She heard the words clearly again, and for a moment they puzzled her. Then she understood them to mean he would come back. Of Of course he will. I will be patient course he will. I will be patient, she vowed again. As soon as my sisters are here, we will go to Maruyama at once. And when Takeo returns, I will conceive a child. I was right to come here As soon as my sisters are here, we will go to Maruyama at once. And when Takeo returns, I will conceive a child. I was right to come here.
She felt so strengthened by the visit to the caves that at the end of the afternoon she went to the family temple to pay her respects to her father's tomb. Hiros.h.i.+ came with her, as did one of the women of the house, Ayako, who carried offerings of fruit and rice and a bowl of smoking incense.
His ashes lay buried among the graves of her ancestors, the s.h.i.+ra-kawa lords. Beneath the huge cedars it was gloomy and cool. The wind soughed in the branches, carrying the min-min min-min of cicadas. Over the years earthquakes had s.h.i.+fted the columns and pillars, and the ground heaved upward as if the dead were trying to escape. of cicadas. Over the years earthquakes had s.h.i.+fted the columns and pillars, and the ground heaved upward as if the dead were trying to escape.
Her fathers grave was still intact. Kaede took the offerings from Ayako and placed them in front of the stone. She clapped her hands and bowed her head. She dreaded hearing or seeing his spirit; yet she wanted to placate it. She could not think calmly about his death. He had wanted to die but had been unable to find the courage to kill himself. s.h.i.+zuka and Kondo had killed him: Did that const.i.tute murder? She was aware, too, of the part she had played, the shame she had brought on him; would his spirit now demand some payment?
She took the bowl of smoldering incense from Ayako and let the smoke waft over the tomb and over her own face and hands to purify her. She put the bowl down and clapped again three times. The wind dropped, the crickets fell silent, and in that moment she felt the earth tremble slightly beneath her. The landscape quivered. The trees shook.
"An earthquake!" Hiros.h.i.+ exclaimed behind her as Ayako gave a cry of fear.
It was only a small tremor, and no more followed, but Ayako was nervous and jittery on the way home.
"Your fathers spirit spoke to you," she murmured to Kaede. "What did he say?"
"He approves of everything I have done," she replied with a confidence she was far from feeling. In fact the tremor had shocked her. She feared her father's angry, embittered ghost and felt it attacked all she had experienced in the sacred caves at the G.o.ddess's feet.
"May heaven be praised," Ayako said, but her lips tightened and she continued to give Kaede anxious glances all evening.
"By the way," Kaede asked her as they ate together, "where is the young man Sunoda, Akita's nephew?" This young man had come with his uncle the previous winter, and she had made him remain in her household as a hostage, in Shoji's care. She was beginning to think she might have need of him now.
"He was allowed to return to Inuyama," Ayako said.
"What?" Shoji had relinquished her hostage? She could not believe the extent of his treachery.
"His father was said to be ill," Ayako explained.
So her hostage was gone, diminis.h.i.+ng her power further.
It was already dusk before she heard Shoji's voice outside. Hiros.h.i.+ had gone with Amano to his house to meet his family and sleep there, and Kaede had been waiting in her father's room, going through the records of the estate. She could see many signs of mismanagement, and when it was obvious Shoji had returned alone, her rage against her father's senior retainer grew even more fierce.
When he came to her Ayako followed him, bringing tea, but Kaede was too impatient to drink it.
"Where are my sisters?" she demanded.
He drank the tea gratefully before replying. He looked hot and tired. "Lord Fujiwara is glad of your return," he said. "He sends you his greetings and asks that you will call on him tomorrow. He will send his palanquin and an escort."
"I have no intention of calling on him," she retorted, trying not to lose her temper. "I expect my sisters to be returned to me tomorrow, and after that we will leave for Maruyama as soon as possible."
"I am afraid your sisters are not there," he said. Her heart plunged to her belly. "Where are they?"
"Lord Fujiwara says Lady s.h.i.+rakawa is not to be alarmed. They are perfectly safe and he will tell her where they are when she visits him tomorrow."
"You dare to bring me such a message?" Her voice sounded thin and unconvincing to her own ears.
Shoji inclined his head. "It gives me no pleasure. But Lord Fujiwara is who he is; I cannot defy or disobey him, nor, I believe, can you."
"They are hostages, then?" she said in a low voice.
He did not answer directly but merely said, "I'll give orders for your journey tomorrow. Shall I accompany you?"
"No!" she cried. "And if I am to go, I will ride. I will not wait for his palanquin. Tell Amano I will ride my gray and he is to come with me."
For a moment she thought he would argue with her, but then he bowed deeply and acquiesced.
After he had gone, her thoughts were in turmoil. If she could not trust Shoji, whom of the domain's men could she trust? Were they trying to trap her? Surely even Fujiwara would not dare. She was married now. At one moment she thought she should return immediately to Maruyama; the next she realized Ai and Hana were in someone else's possession and she understood what it meant to have hostages held against her.
So must my mother and Lady Naomi have suffered, she thought. I must go to Fujiwara and bargain with him for them. He has helped me before. He will not turn completely against me now I must go to Fujiwara and bargain with him for them. He has helped me before. He will not turn completely against me now.
Next she began to worry about what to do with Hiros.h.i.+. It had seemed like the safest of journeys; yet she could not help feeling that she had brought him into danger. Should he ride with her to Lord Fujiwara's or should she send him home as quickly as possible?
She rose early and sent for Amano. She dressed in the simple traveling clothes she had worn on the journey, even though she could hear s.h.i.+zuka's voice in her head: You can't appear before Lord Fujiwara on horseback like a warrior You can't appear before Lord Fujiwara on horseback like a warrior. Her own better judgment told her to delay a few days, to send messages and gifts and then to travel in his palanquin with his escort, dressed perfectly for him, presented like the flawless treasures he prized. s.h.i.+zuka, even Manami, would have advised her so. But her impatience was too great. She knew she would never endure the waiting and the inactivity. She would meet Lord Fujiwara once more, would find out where her sisters were and what he wanted, and would then go immediately back to Maruyama, back to Takeo.
When Amano came she sent the women away so she could speak privately with him, and quickly explained the situation.
"I have to go to Lord Fujiwara's, but to tell you the truth I am anxious about his intentions. We may need to leave quickly and return to Maruyama at speed. Be ready for it, and make sure the men and horses are prepared."
His eyes narrowed. "There will be no fighting, surely?"
"I don't know. I am afraid they will try to detain me."
"Against your will? It's impossible!"
"It's unlikely, I know, but I am uneasy. Why were my sisters taken away if not to force me in some way?"
"We should leave at once," he said, young enough not to be cowed by the n.o.bleman's rank. "Let your husband talk to Lord Fujiwara with the sword."
"I am afraid of what will be done to my sisters. I must at least find out where they are. Shoji says we cannot defy Fujiwara, and I suppose he is right. I will have to go and speak with him. But I will not go into the house. Do not let them take me inside."
Amano bowed. Kaede went on: "Should Hiros.h.i.+ be sent home? I wish I had not brought him; I have the burden of his safety on me now too."
"There is safety in numbers," Amano said. "He should stay with us. And anyway, if there is to be trouble, we can ill spare the men to escort him back. I will die before any harm comes to him or you."
She smiled, grateful for his loyalty, "Then let us leave with no more delay."
The weather had changed again. The clarity and coolness of the last few days had given way to a renewed oppressiveness. It was humid and still, the sort of day that heralded the typhoons of late summer. The horses were sweating and restless, Hiros.h.i.+'s roan more unsettled than ever.
Kaede wanted to talk to Hiros.h.i.+, to warn him of the possible dangers that lay ahead, to make him promise not to get involved in any fighting; but the horse was too fidgety, and Amano made the boy ride in front with him, lest the roan upset Raku as well. She could feel the sweat running down inside her clothes. She hoped she would not arrive red in the face and soaked. She was already half regretting the rashness of her decision. But, as always, riding made her feel more powerful. She had made the journey only in the palanquin before, never able to look out on the landscape from behind the silk curtains and oiled paper screens that had enclosed her. Now she was able to absorb the beauty of the scenery, the richness of farmland and forest, the grandeur of the distant mountains, range after range, each slightly paler than the one in front, fading until they merged into the sky.
No wonder Lord Fujiwara did not want to leave this beautiful place. His image, seductive and intriguing, rose before her eyes. She remembered how he had always seemed to like and admire her. She could not believe he would harm her. But her senses were heightened with some apprehension. Is this how it feels to ride into battle Is this how it feels to ride into battle, she wondered, life never seeming more beautiful nor more fleeting, to be grasped and flung away in one and the same breath life never seeming more beautiful nor more fleeting, to be grasped and flung away in one and the same breath?
She put her hand on the sword in her belt, rea.s.sured by the feel of the hilt.
They were only a few miles from the gates of Fujiwara's residence when they saw dust on the road ahead, and out of the haze trotted the palanquin bearers and hors.e.m.e.n sent by the n.o.bleman to fetch her. Their leader spotted the silver river crest on Amano's surcoat and drew rein to greet him. His gaze swept over Kaede and then his neck muscles corded as his eyes snapped back to her in astonishment.
"Lady s.h.i.+rakawa," he gasped, and shouted to the bearers, "Down! Down!"
They dropped the palanquin and knelt in the dust. The hors.e.m.e.n dismounted and stood with bowed heads. They appeared submissive, but she saw immediately that they outnumbered her men two to one.
"I am on my way to visit His Lords.h.i.+p," she said. She recognized the retainer but could not recall his name. He was the man who had always come to escort her to Lord Fujiwara's in the past.
"I am Murita," he said. "Would Lady s.h.i.+rakawa not prefer to be carried?"
"I will ride," she said shortly. "We are so close now." His lips were compressed into a thin line. He disapproves He disapproves, she thought, and glanced at Amano and Hiros.h.i.+, who were now alongside her. Amano's face gave nothing away, but there was a flush of blood beneath Hiros.h.i.+'s skin.
Are they embarra.s.sed for me? Am I shaming myself and them? Kaede straightened her back and urged Raku forward.
Murita sent two of his men ahead, increasing her sense of unease about the reception that awaited them, but she could think of nothing to do but ride onward.
The horses felt her anxiety. Raku sidestepped a little, ears p.r.i.c.ked, eyes rolling, and Hiros.h.i.+'s horse threw its head in the air and tried to buck. The boy's knuckles were white on the reins as he brought it under control.
When they came to the residence, the gates were open and armed guards stood inside the courtyard. Amano dismounted and came to help Kaede from Raku's back.
"I will not get down until Lord Fujiwara comes," she said boldly.
"I do not intend to stay."
Murita hesitated, unwilling to take such a message.
"Tell him I am here," she pressed.
"Lady s.h.i.+rakawa." He bowed his head and dismounted, but at that moment Lord Fujiwara's young companion Mamoru the actor came from the house and knelt in front of her horse.
"Welcome, lady," he said. "Please come inside."
She was afraid that if she did she would never come out. "Mamoru," she said curtly, "I will not go inside. I have come to find out where my sisters are."
He stood then and came to the right side of her horse, stepping between her and Amano. He, who had rarely looked directly at her, now seemed to be trying to meet her gaze.
"Lady s.h.i.+rakawa..." he began, and she heard something in his voice.
"Remount," she said to Amano, and he obeyed her instantly.
"Please," Mamoru said quietly, "it's best if you comply. I beg you. For your sake, for the sake of your men, the boy..."
"If Lord Fujiwara will not come to speak to me and will not tell me what I want to know, I have no further business here."
She did not see who gave the order. She was aware only of some look that flashed between Mamoru and Murita.
"Ride!" she cried to Amano, and tried to turn Raku's head, but Murita was holding the bridle. She leaned forward, drawing her sword and urging the horse to rear. He shook his head free from the man's grip and went up on his hind legs, striking out with his forefeet. She struck downward at Murita and saw the blade slice against his hand. He cried out in fury, pulling out his own sword. She thought he would kill her, but he grabbed at the bridle again, wrenching the horses head down. She felt something plunge and flail behind her: It was Hiros.h.i.+'s horse, panicking. Mamoru was plucking at her clothes, calling out to her, begging her to surrender. Beyond him she could see Amano. His sword was drawn, but before he could use it an arrow struck him in the chest. She saw the look of shock come into his eyes, then blood began to bubble with each breath and he fell forward.
"No!" she screamed. Murita, at the same moment, in frustrated rage, thrust his sword upward into Raku's exposed chest. The horse screamed, too, in pain and fear, and his bright blood began to gush. As he faltered, legs swaying, head sinking, Murita caught Kaede and tried to drag her from his back. She struck out at him once more, but the horse was falling, taking her down, and her blow had no strength in it. Munta caught her wrist and effortlessly twisted the sword from her hand. Saying nothing, he half dragged, half carried her to the house. "Help me! Help me!" she called, twisting her head round, trying to look back at her men, but the swift, ferocious a.s.sault had left them all dead or dying. "Hiros.h.i.+!" she screamed, and heard hooves pounding. The last thing she saw before Murita carried her inside was the roan bolting, carrying the boy away against his will. It was the slightest grain of comfort.
Murita searched her for other weapons, finding her knife; his hand was bleeding freely and rage made him rough. Mamoru ran before them, opening doors as he took her to the guest rooms. When he released her she fell to the ground, sobbing with rage and grief.
"Raku! Raku!" she wept, as grief-stricken as if the horse had been her child. Then she wept for Amano and the others whom she had led to their deaths.
Mamoru knelt beside her, babbling, "I'm sorry, Lady s.h.i.+rakawa. You must submit. No one is going to hurt you. Believe me, we all love and honor you here. Please calm yourself."
When she only wept more desperately, he said to the maids, "Send for Dr. Is.h.i.+da."
A few minutes later she was aware of the physician's presence. He knelt beside her and she raised her head, pus.h.i.+ng aside her hair and gazing at him with stricken eyes.
"Lady s.h.i.+rakawa-" he began, but she interrupted him.
"My name is Otori. I am married. What is this outrage? You will not let them keep me here. You will tell them to let me go at once."
"I wish I could," he said in a low voice. "But we all lead our lives here according to His Lords.h.i.+p's will, not our own."
"What does he want from me? Why has he done this? He has abducted my sisters, murdered my men!" The tears poured anew down her face. "He did not need to kill my horse." She was racked by sobs.
Is.h.i.+da told the maids to fetch herbs from his house and bring hot water. Then he examined her gently, looking in her eyes and feeling her pulse.
"Forgive me," he said, "but I must ask you if you are carrying a child."
"Why must you know that? It is nothing to do with you!"
"His Lords.h.i.+p's intention is to marry you. He considers that you were betrothed to him. He had already sought the emperor's permission, as well as Lord Arai's."
"We were never betrothed," Kaede sobbed. "I am married to Otori Takeo."
Is.h.i.+da said gently, "I can't discuss these things with you. You will see His Lords.h.i.+p directly. But as your physician I must know if you are pregnant."