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"I don't think I've ever felt so cold in my life as I felt in that water."
His hands were on her shoulders and he seemed to be looking for something in her eyes. As I remember it," he said, his voice raw and s.e.xy," we found a very effective way to thaw you out."
Her hands were on his waist when his mouth started its descent toward hers.
Tess felt herself involuntarily stiffening.
"You don't trust me," he whispered, "and there's no reason you should.
But you want me, Tessa. As badly as I want you."
Her eyes couldn't get enough of him, couldn't keep from devouring that chiseled bad-boy face, with its slas.h.i.+ng dimples, dark brows and midnight eyes--intelligent, cunning, streetwise, eyes that reflected a troubled soul that had seen too much pain and too little joy. Eyes that were burning with desire and need and with just one look melted her resistance like sugar in the rain.
"I want you," he told her again as his arms slid around her and pulled her against his long, hard body. "Tessa." He murmured her name into her hair, his smoky voice sending ribbons of desire slipping through her.
When their mouths finally met, their kiss was the kiss of lovers too long denied. Their lips Were warm, moist, open, seeking and finding, and seeking again. When his hands slid over her bottom and skimmed up under her blouse, his touch sent s.h.i.+vers of delight racing through her as his hands dosed around her rib cage and his thumbs brushed the undersides of her b.r.e.a.s.t.s.
"Reed," she breathed against his lips and slid her arms around him neck and let her fingers tangle into his thick, dark hair. A groan, primal and foreign, came from deep wit him her throat and warned her that she was moments from losing control.
He seemed to sense the subtle change and he dragged his mouth from hers as if it pained him. Burying his face in her neck, he whispered, "I want you, Tess," before he took her hand and led her into the bedroom.
In the doorway, he kissed her once more. A quick, hot, breathless kiss that left them both panting. A promise. A warning. A last chance to turn and run. But Tess wasn't running; And she only hesitated a moment before moving into his arms again, telling herself that this moment might be all }hey over had. If it was, her heart told her that this one moment would be worth a lifetime of regret. in the morning.
Chapter Twelve.
Tess awoke alone. Forcing her sleep-clouded mind clear, she sat up in the bed and saw the bag she'd packed last night sitting on a wooden chair in the corner. Reed's duffel bag was gone. And so was Reed.
Reaching for her oversize white s.h.i.+rt on the tiled floor where it had been hastily dkscarded last night, She felt a growing uneasiness gnawing at her.
The bedroom door was open and as she slid her arms into the s.h.i.+rt and swung her legs over the side of the bed, she called out, "" McKenna, are you out there?" She despised the tentative, hopeful note She heard echoing around her.
Walking barefoot through the living room, she pulled the front door open and gazed out onto the screened porch. It was as empty as she was beginning to feel. Hurrying back inside, she took a pair of shorts and a T-s.h.i.+rt into the bathroom with her and quickly showered in cold water that told her Reed was not out back fixing the generator.
Ten minutes later she was dressed, with her hair still wet when she gathered it into a careless ponytail at her nape. The watch she'd left on the table beside the bed read a few minutes to ten.
Outside it was already hot, the sky pale blue and cloudless above a calm sea that sparkled as though it had been sprinkled with a million diamonds for as far as the eye could see. She called his name again, much louder this time, as her eyes swept the beach on both sides of the bungalow, Behind the cabin a long sloping hill rose some two to three hundred feet. Tess shaded her eyes with the back of her hand and looked up, but could see no one moving on the hillside.
Feeling retless and unreasonably agitated, she decided to walk to where they'd left the Jeep parked last night. Remembering how anxious Reed had been to begin the search for the silver-eyed messenger, Tess told herself that he'd start that search without her. Perhaps he had gone into town to get started with the questions he seemed so sure would produce results.
The jog down the beach should have invigorated and restored her, but when she saw the Jeep parked under the pans, precisely where Reed had parked it last night, she felt weighted once again with worry.
Judging by the tracks in the sand, the Jeep hadn't been moved.
Apprehension rose in earnest inside her. Where was he? Last night had proved to her that he was certainly in good enough physical condition to have walked back to Bodden Town, but why? Why walk when he had the Jeep?
And if he'd taken his duffel bag, didn't that mean he wasn't planning to return?
The answer came back to her by degrees, despite her best efforts to ignore it. He'd left the Jeep because he didn't want to leave her stranded, bemuse even a coward had some principles. And even though he couldn't face her this morning, he wouldn't leave her with no means of getting back to civilization.
Wallring back to the bungalow, Tess felt alternately disappointed and enraged. Her pride had been battered, and suddenly her senses became fine-tuned as she realized what a deserted stretch of beach this really was.
Every sound spooked her, the sudden squeak of a bird, the tide hissing around a rock, even the breeze rustling through the stately palms.
By the time she stepped back across the screened porch and into the house, her nerves were stretched as taut as violin strings. If Reed McKenna didn't show up in the next hour, she vowed to drive back to Georgetown and lay the whole matter at the feet of the Cayman police, whether he approved or not.
She killed five minutes by making the bed, and another five by clearing the remnants of last night's picnic dinner from the living room. Then, left alone with the time moving in slow motion, her mind began to whirl again with possible explanations for Reed's abshe walked out onto the porch and stared at the sea as her thoughts drifted back to their lovemaking last night.
Closing her eyes, she could almost imagine the warmth of his breath on her cheek, the touch of his hands on her skin.
Their lovemaking had gone from the heated urgency of lost teenage lovers, to the slow, patient reacquainting of the adults they had become. Their kisses had been soft, deep, thorough . then touching, tender. Though Reed's body had been taut and hard, his caresses had been as sensual as fine silk.
He had hld her and kissed her like a man deeply in love, and by the light of the flickering candles, she'd seen in his eyes the depth of his need.
Physical. Spiritual. His soul was now as battered as his young body had once been.
When the first pink light of morning had begun to seep around the curtains at the bedroom window, they'd held each other and fallen into a deep satisfied sleep, entwined in each others' arms, their sated bodies still moist with spent pa.s.sion.
But all the rernemhered tenderness and ecstasy of last night could not dispel the hard reality of the morning that Tess stood facing alone. And although she fought to resist it, a single thought repeated itself over and over in her mind: he left you again. He could not face her, could not face the adult demands he imagined she might make on him after last night's intimacies.
Tess berated first herself and then him as she tossed her clothes into her bag and proceeded to search for the keys to the Jeep.
Eventually she found them under the bed, where she figured they must have fallen from Reed's pocket when she'd undressed him last night.
Her humiliation and rage rose like a geyser at the thought that he'd been in such a rush to leave her this morning that be hadn't taken the time to look for the keys.
By the time she heard the motorcycle pull up in front of the bungalow, she was already across the porch, propelled by a head of angry steam that would not be quelled: Her whole body was shaking with the unspoken accusations that she longed to hurl at him. And when she saw him riding toward her, s.h.i.+rtless, his tanned chest glistening in the morning sun, his dark hair s.h.i.+ning and tousled by the breeze, his easy smile carving dimples in his cheeks, she felt her heart breaking.
THE FIRST THING he saw when he shut off the engine was her bag and the keys to the Jeep clutched in her hand. The next thing he noticed, besides her slightly swollen lower lip and the tantalizing way she looked standing in snug-fitting blue-jean shorts and bare feet, was the look on her face. The expression she wore was one of blatant anger, a look of sheer rage that he couldn't begin to understand.
"Where are you going, Tessa?"
"What the h.e.l.l do you care?" Her eyes had turned a deeper blue and her face was flushed with crimson.
"Hey, what's going on? What's happened?" he asked, placing a hand on each shoulder, only to feel her go rigid beneath his touch.
"That might be a more appropriate question for me to be asking, don't you think, Reed? I've been shot at and chased. I've been the target of an explosion that killed at least one innocent man. I'm standing here in the middle of nowhere with my only living relative missing, at the n?cy of cold-blooded gangsters, and you have the gall to ask me what's going on?" She stopped only long enough to drag in a lungful of air. "And as if all of that isn't bad enough, I wake up this morning to find you gone, G.o.d knows where, without a word. The man who just last night asked m to 'trust him, despite the fact that he not only left me at the altar, but betrayed me in the most heartless way" -- The tears welled, but she refused to let them fall.
"Betrayed you? Tessa, I--'; She swiped savagely at her eyes and shoved past him.
"Get out of my way, McKenna. I'm going back to Georgetown and straight to the police, which is where I should have gone when I first discovered Se-lena was missing."
He grabbed her arm; but she shrugged away from him.
"Get out of my way, McKenna," she repeated.
"And don't try to stop me from doing what I know now I have to do."
"I won't try to stop you from doing anything, but I think I deserve some kind of an explanation for why you shared my bed last night, and this morning I've suddenly become your enemy again."
Her eyes were dry, the tears gone, replaced by an expression of bitterness that caused his heart to constrict painfully in his chest.
"You want an explanation?" she gasped, her indignation a formidable presence between them.
"You know, Reed, coming from you that's almost funny, from the man famous for his walking act, for disappearing just when he's most needed."
He felt his own anger rising at the need to explain himself, but he fought to control his temper.
"This morning when the leasing agent came by, I didn't want to wake you.
I rode back into town with him to pick up gasoline for the generator. I rented this bike, figuring we could cover more ground if we split up today to question the locals."
Her eyes flicked to the metal gas can strapped to the back of the bike.
"I didn't leave you, Tessa."
"No," she admitted, "you didn't leave me ... not this time. But the point is, you could have. And problem is, I'd care if you did!" She turned to stare out over the water, crossing her arms protectively over her heart.
"I can't let myself believe in you, McKenna. This morning, waking up alone ..." Her voice caught and she swallowed hard before continuing.
"Well, it just all came back, that's all," she said quietly. "I know I have no right to expect anything from you, to hope for anything. You haven't made any promises and neither have I."
He came up behind her and put his hands on her shoulders.
"I'm sorry, Tessa." He could almost feel the past coming between them again.
They'd started planning the wedding that January. The date had been set for mid-June. The invitations had been ordered and she'd even picked out a dress. But then Sean had been killed.
"When Sean died I felt responsible." Just saying the words twisted a knot in his heart.
"I let him down. He thought I'd always be there for him. I couldn't take the chance that I'd do the same thing to you."
He'd admitted more to her in thirty seconds than he'd ever admitted to anyone, including himself, in eight years.
"Running away, enlisting ... it was a cowardly thing to do, I know that now.
And I admit it. I'm sorry. You deserved better. Much better than I could ever give you." He let his hands fall away from her shoulders, but she didn't walk away. At least she was willing to hear him out and that alone was something, he told himself as he continued trying to reach her.
"I was young, stupid, a coward--all the things you thought about me and more were true. But d.a.m.n it, Tess, young people break engagements every day. To hate me for so long, to carry around all this bitterness ...
Tess, how could you hate me for so long?"
When her eyes met his again, they were accusing.
"I don't know how you can stand there and pretend not to know."
He had no answer for something he didn't understand.
"She was so young, and she loved you so much." She swallowed the emotion he could hear choking her. "Okay, so you decided you couldn't marry me--all right. I understand. And I learned to live with it. But my G.o.d, Reed, how could you just walk out On her like that? Just pretend she never existed, that the Child she was carrying never happened?"
If she'd slapped him he couldn't have felt more stunned.
"Child?" he blurted.
"What child?" His mind scrambled in a dozen different directions at the same time, but for the life of him he had no idea who or what she was talking about.
With a final look of bitterness and disgust, she turned and started walking toward the road.
"Wait. Tess! Wait, d.a.m.n it!"
"Forget it, McKenna," she shouted over her shoulder.
Standing there, watching her go, his mind raced back in time, working frantically to make some sense out of the things she'd said. The child she was carrying. Was it possible that someone had lied to Tess, told her he'd been unfaithful? But who? The child she was carrying . she was so young.
The p,le pieces fell together, but the picture they formed was distorted.
When he caught up to her, he didn't try to stop her or touch her, but merely matched her stride, watching her chest rise and fall with every angry breath and feeling his own frustration straining to the breaking point.
"Are you telling me you thought Meredith was carrying my child?"
She kept walking and didn't answer.
"But you can't seriously believe that!"
"I can't?" she blurted, stopping so suddenly he almost stumbled into her.
"No, you can't believe it. Because it isn't true. Where the h.e.l.l did you get such an idea?"
'From Meredith," she replied, stunning him again." Meredith?"
"Meredith told you I'd slept with her?" His voice resonated with his startled disbelief.
Her glare said she'd never hated anyone more tharr she hated him now.
"No," sh spat.
"She conldn't tell me. She never had the chance. But after she died, I read her diary.
"I've decided to take Reed's advice and keep my baby. Reed says I'll make a wonderful mother."
" The words brought silent tears and watching them slip down her cheeks, Reed felt as though they were being wrung out of his own heart.
"The last hate me for so long, to carry around all this bitterness ...