Chaos And Order_ The Gap Into Madness - BestLightNovel.com
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Ciro stopped as if she'd cut his vocal cords.
Morn waited in the pa.s.sage, holding a handgrip outside the door. She was alone. Her eyes seemed unnaturally dark; almost fatal; haunted by doubt and worry.
As the door swept aside, she showed Mikka an uncertain smile, then came determinedly into the cabin. There she let Trumpet's Trumpet's gentle acceleration tug her to a halt. After a glance at Mikka, her gaze turned to the bunk where Ciro lay with his back toward her and his face hidden against the wall. gentle acceleration tug her to a halt. After a glance at Mikka, her gaze turned to the bunk where Ciro lay with his back toward her and his face hidden against the wall.
"My G.o.d," she whispered. "What happened to him?"
Mikka drew a shuddering breath. Without transition the thunder became fury. Rage rolled and crashed like a storm in her head. "Nick set him up. Left him as bait. Sacrificed Sacrificed him. He wanted him. He wanted Soar Soar to take him-I don't know why. Some kind of scheme." to take him-I don't know why. Some kind of scheme."
Her throat closed. No words could convey what she felt. She made a helpless gesture. "He's been like this ever since she let him go. First"-it was impossible to say this, it hurt too much, but somehow she forced it out-"he told me to kill him. Now he wants me to leave him alone."
Morn's eyes widened: the darkness haunting them grew deeper. Her mouth formed the words, "Kill him?" Then she bit her lip.
Mikka started to speak again. Or she thought she did. She meant to. Meant to ask, Where's Nick? What's going on? Why are you alive? What did Angus do to you? But she didn't make a sound. Her head hurt as if she'd just been hit. The bandage on her forehead obscured her vision in one eye. And Morn was looking at Ciro as if she saw his doom in the taut lines of his back.
Mikka knew this about Morn: she'd been Nick's victim as well as Angus'; only her zone implant had kept her sane. But she hadn't had that support when the Amnion had pumped their mutagens into her veins. She understood doom.
"Ciro."
She said his name softly. Nevertheless her voice was enough to make him flinch.
"Turn around, Ciro. Look at me. I need to talk to you, and I want you to look at me."
Ciro pressed himself harder against the wall.
With her eyes, Morn asked Mikka's permission to go on. Mikka nodded roughly, and Morn nudged herself toward Ciro's bunk. When she reached it, she closed one hand in the webbing, pulled herself down to sit on the edge of the bunk, then rested her other hand on Ciro's shoulder.
She made no effort to draw him toward her: she simply let him feel her presence through his tension.
"Ciro," she repeated. "We beat Nick. Sib tied him up. And Angus doesn't take his orders anymore. He's helpless."
Surprised out of herself, Mikka broke in, "How-?" How in h.e.l.l did you manage that! that! At once, however, she set her teeth on her tongue. She didn't want to interrupt. At once, however, she set her teeth on her tongue. She didn't want to interrupt.
A subtle change showed in Ciro's body. He didn't move, but Mikka could tell that he was listening.
"The message that gave Nick Angus' priority-codes came from Punisher" Punisher" Morn answered quietly. "From Dolph Ubikwe. I told you I thought there was something else going on. Something to hope for. This time I was right. Morn answered quietly. "From Dolph Ubikwe. I told you I thought there was something else going on. Something to hope for. This time I was right.
"Somehow that message programmed Angus' computer with new instructions. As soon as Nick and the rest of you left the s.h.i.+p, Angus told us the same codes. He handed himself to us. Then he told us how to set him free. How to help him free himself. Now he doesn't have any priority-codes. They're blocked-they don't affect him. He can make his own choices again."
"Wait a minute," Mikka protested. She couldn't help herself: what she heard horrified her. "You had his codes-you had that b.a.s.t.a.r.d in your control-and you set him free!" free!"
Morn didn't look up at Mikka. She didn't need to.
"He used my zone implant to hurt me. So did Nick. I can't treat other people that way."
Mikka pressed a hand over her bandage to contain the pain. She was doomed; they were all finished. Morn couldn't treat other people that way. treat other people that way. Great. Wonderful. So instead she put herself at his mercy. Again. He was still a cyborg, wasn't he? Now he had the power to treat everyone else the way he'd once treated her. Great. Wonderful. So instead she put herself at his mercy. Again. He was still a cyborg, wasn't he? Now he had the power to treat everyone else the way he'd once treated her.
No wonder she looked haunted. She'd gone over the edge. Like Nick.
Yet she didn't sound crazy. I can't treat other people that way. can't treat other people that way. She sounded like a woman who'd made up her mind to take risks which terrified her. She sounded like a woman who'd made up her mind to take risks which terrified her.
Mikka tried to swallow the futility rising in her gorge. "So what choices is he making?"
Morn lifted her head. For a moment she closed her eyes, as if that might help her bear the pain of her memories.
"Somehow," she murmured distantly, "a long time ago, he and I made a deal. A commitment to keep each other alive. He gave me the control to my zone implant. I took it and went with Nick. Instead of turning myself in to Com-Mine Security. That way Security didn't have enough evidence to execute him. And I got what I thought I needed to go on living.
"Apparently that-I don't really know what to call it-that accommodation still holds for him. He honors it. And maybe he thinks I honored it by letting him free himself."
Slowly Morn opened her eyes and turned to face Mikka. Now the darkness in her gaze looked like a wail of loss.
"Right now he's leaving the choices to me."
Mikka tried, but she couldn't hold Morn's eyes. Not for the first time, she felt weak and limited in Morn's presence; essentially ashamed. Morn should have been the weakest person aboard. Certainly she was the most damaged. And yet she was stronger than anyone else. She just didn't know it.
Despite the tremor of need which made her voice shake, Mikka asked, "So what choices are you you making?" making?"
Morn considered the question for a moment. She seemed to flinch inwardly as she answered, "We're going after Soar." Soar."
That struck a nerve. Without warning Ciro thrashed around to face Morn. His expression ached with an intensity Mikka couldn't interpret-hope or despair so extreme that they were indistinguishable from each other.
Now, however, Morn didn't look at him. Instead she concentrated on Mikka as if she'd forgotten about him.
Intuitively Mikka understood. She, too, refused to look at him-she didn't want to drive him back into his clenched rejection. Instead she asked Morn sourly, "Now why would you go and do something like that?"
A small frown pained Morn's forehead. "That s.h.i.+p used to have another name. She was called Gutbuster Gutbuster, and she killed my mother. She killed the only mother Davies remembers. In a strange way, she's the reason he and I both became cops. So we could try to get the s.h.i.+p that killed our mother."
Ciro raised himself on one elbow as if he wanted to see Morn's face better. His free hand started to reach toward her, then fell back.
"He wants that more than I do," she went on. "Or I want it, but I don't trust it. Revenge is too expensive. And maybe we have more important things to do.
"But our minds started diverging as soon as he was born. We've been changing in different ways. There's enough of Angus in him to affect the way he thinks. And everything that's ever happened to him has been twisted-He needs simple decisions. They help him hang on to who he is."
Morn shrugged. "And I'm supposed to be a cop. I need that. So maybe if I'm going to turn myself into the kind of cop I can believe in, I have to start from the beginning."
Soft as a whimper, Ciro protested, "No. Don't-"
Still without turning away from Mikka, Morn spoke to him.
"Do you understand what I'm saying, Ciro? We're going after Soar. Soar. And And Soar Soar did something to you." An undercurrent of anger began to surge in her voice, whetting her words like knives. "Sorus Chatelaine wants to use you against us somehow. did something to you." An undercurrent of anger began to surge in her voice, whetting her words like knives. "Sorus Chatelaine wants to use you against us somehow.
"Not just against Nick," she insisted. "Do you understand that, Ciro? I don't know what she told you, but this isn't aimed at him. He's irrelevant. She works for the Amnion. And they want us us dead. We have an immunity drug. We have Davies. We know about their near-C acceleration experiments. If they can't take us, they need to kill us. dead. We have an immunity drug. We have Davies. We know about their near-C acceleration experiments. If they can't take us, they need to kill us.
"She's hunting us right now. No matter where we go, she'll come after us. We'll never be safe. That's as good a reason as any to hunt her ourselves."
"Please," Ciro moaned as if she were cutting at him; as if what she said flensed the skin from his bones. His eyes clung to her like pleading. "Don't do this to me."
"I'm not," Morn retorted. "She "She is. Sorus Chatelaine did this to you. I'm just trying to help you understand it." is. Sorus Chatelaine did this to you. I'm just trying to help you understand it."
Slowly she s.h.i.+fted on the edge of the bunk until she could face him. Mikka held her breath as Morn moved her hand-so slowly that it seemed inexorable-to Ciro's chest and gripped the front of his s.h.i.+psuit. With her fist, she lifted him upright to sit in front of her.
He stared naked dread at her. His eyes were so full of white fear that they appeared to have no irises. His mouth hung open. But he didn't resist. Somehow she'd taken control of him.
"Maybe you can change it," she told him. Anger and pain made her strong. "If we leave you alone, and you do whatever it is she wants from you, we'll all die. One way or another. If we don't die fighting her, they'll make us Amnion. All of us, Ciro. Not just Nick. Not just Angus. Mikka and me. Sib and Vector and Davies. A handful of antimutagen pills-which is all we have left-won't save us.
"If we lock you up so you can't do anything, we can probably keep her from taking us. But she still might kill us. That s.h.i.+p has a super-light proton cannon. One hit is all she needs."
Mikka winced. Super-light-? Oh, s.h.i.+t!
"Leave him alone," she breathed at Morn. "Don't you think he's scared enough already?"
Ciro's lower lip quivered. His fear seemed to leave him mute.
Morn went on as if she'd forgotten remorse and knew nothing about terror. Each word was as distinct as an incision.
"But if you tell us what she wants you to do, we might be able to use that against her. We might have a chance. And if you tell us what she did to you, we might be able to help you.
"It's up to you, Ciro," she finished. "But you'd better make up your mind soon. We don't have much time."
Still she didn't let him go.
"I mean it, Morn," Mikka warned thinly. Pain and thunder m.u.f.fled everything. She could hardly hear herself. "That's enough. It would be kinder if you just tortured him."
Morn ignored her. Her gaze and her grip on Ciro's s.h.i.+psuit didn't waver.
He squirmed against her grasp. His voice shook. "You're going to kill me."
"Maybe." Morn didn't s.h.i.+rk the possibility. "Maybe we will. But before it comes to that we'll do everything in our power to save you. And right now, with Angus and this s.h.i.+p on our side, we have a lot lot of power. of power.
"Ciro," she added more gently, "tell us. Please. Give us a chance to show you you're not alone."
"Alone?" His voice cracked, but he didn't stop. Morn had tapped a core of frenzy in him-a pa.s.sion as knotted and extreme as his sister's. "You're going to show me I'm His voice cracked, but he didn't stop. Morn had tapped a core of frenzy in him-a pa.s.sion as knotted and extreme as his sister's. "You're going to show me I'm not alone! not alone!
"What about Mikka? How alone alone is she?" is she?"
Mikka gaped at him in surprise.
"You're a cop," he cried, "a cop, you keep telling us you're a cop. cop. Well, Well, she's she's an illegal. So is Sib. Even an illegal. So is Sib. Even Vector's Vector's an illegal. What're you going to show an illegal. What're you going to show them! them! What are they going to have left when you're done being a cop? Why is it worse for them to die now? At least they can fight. They don't have to sit around waiting to be What are they going to have left when you're done being a cop? Why is it worse for them to die now? At least they can fight. They don't have to sit around waiting to be executed!" executed!"
Morn flinched as if he'd flung acid in her face.
When she heard him-and saw Morn's reaction-Mikka snapped; she couldn't endure any more. Flailing her nearly weightless limbs, she swam to the edge of the bunk, grabbed it, hauled herself down, and drove her desperate fury at her brother.
"Don't give me that bulls.h.i.+t! bulls.h.i.+t! I don't I don't care care about being executed! I don't care about anything that might happen days or weeks or about being executed! I don't care about anything that might happen days or weeks or months months from now, if we're lucky enough to live that long. I care about from now, if we're lucky enough to live that long. I care about you!" you!"
Struggling to control herself, she lowered her voice. "And after that I care about fighting the b.a.s.t.a.r.ds who got all of us into this mess. I can take responsibility for my own crimes."
But the effort of restraint seemed to hurt her as much as his fear. She needed to howl; needed to raise her head to the ceiling and wail while her heart tore.
"If you want to betray us," she rasped bitterly, "then do it. do it. But don't use But don't use me me as an excuse. And don't use Sorus Chatelaine, either. All she did is lean on you. She isn't here holding a gun to your head." as an excuse. And don't use Sorus Chatelaine, either. All she did is lean on you. She isn't here holding a gun to your head."
Ciro couldn't match her when she was like this. She could see what was left of his resistance crumbling under her scorn. He was already broken: Sorus had shattered something that he depended on to keep him whole. Morn had brought him out of his defenses in order to put pressure on him. And now his sister snarled at him as if he were contemptible- "No," he admitted like a whipped child. "She isn't. It's worse than that."
Like Morn, Mikka stared as if she were paralyzed. Angus had cracked her skull. Why hadn't he deafened her as well? She didn't want to hear this. It was more than she could bear.
But Ciro had made his decision. Crouched and beaten on the bunk, with his heart in his eyes and his throat full of pain, he told her and Morn what they'd asked to hear.
"She serves the Amnion because they gave her a mutagen. A special one. It's slow. Then they gave her an antidote. One that just postpones the mutagen. She stays human as long the antidote lasts. As long as they keep her supplied. But if she doesn't take it-or if they don't give it to her-the mutagen starts up again."
His voice sank as he spoke. And yet no matter how low it was, Mikka could still hear it. The clamoring reverberation in her head gave her no protection. She was powerless to forgive herself. Nick had sacrificed him, and it was her fault. She'd given her brother to Nick as surely as if she, too, had considered him only bait.
"She did the same thing to me. She and some man. I think he might have been Milos Taverner."
Tears began to spill from his eyes, but he didn't notice them. Mikka herself hardly noticed them.
"If I sabotage the drives so we can't run or fight, she'll take me with her. She'll keep me supplied." His throat closed on a sob. "So I can stay human."
Take me with her. Mikka groaned. "And you believe that?"
"I have to," he answered simply.
Have to? Of course he did. Sorus Chatelaine had injected a mutagen into his veins. There was nothing else left for him to believe.
Mikka's need to howl mounted until she couldn't contain it. Pus.h.i.+ng back from the bunk, she brandished her helpless fists and brought up a scream from the bottom of her heart.
At once, Morn caught her by the front of her s.h.i.+psuit, held her the same way she'd held Ciro. Her eyes were cold and dark, as bleak as ice. Lines of authority marked her face like emaciation. "Mikka! We don't have time time for this!" for this!"
Her shout hit Mikka like a slap. Mikka swung a wild blow at Morn's head. But there wasn't enough g to anchor her. Her own force tossed her away from the impact, out of control.
By the time she'd reached the wall and recovered, Morn was at the intercom.
Ignoring Mikka now, Morn thumbed the pickup toggle.
"Vector. Are you there? I need you."
"I'm here, Morn," Vector answered promptly. Metallic circuits or concentration made him sound abstract; too far away to be reached. "Give me twenty minutes. I don't want to stop in the middle of this."
"Vector-" Morn began.
"It's going to be great," he went on as if he hadn't heard her. "I'm coding a transmission. It's in my name-maybe that will give it some credibility. In essence, it says that since I left Intertech I've finished the research I was doing there. I've developed an antimutagen. I'll include the formula. Maybe suggest test procedures for verification. We can set it to broadcast constantly, wherever we go. Anybody who hears it can produce the immunity drug for themselves.
"G.o.d, Morn, I've dreamed dreamed of doing something like this. I still can't believe it's happening. It's going to make everything else worthwhile." of doing something like this. I still can't believe it's happening. It's going to make everything else worthwhile."
"But not now" not now" Morn cut in fiercely. Outrage bristled in her voice. "Vector, I Morn cut in fiercely. Outrage bristled in her voice. "Vector, I need need you! That can wait. This can't." you! That can wait. This can't."
The intercom was silent long enough to make Mikka think that Vector would refuse. Then the tiny speaker crackled.
"All right. I'm on my way. Where are you?"