The Last Confession Of Thomas Hawkins Part 6

'Nonsense.' I relit my pipe.

Ned took a mouthful of punch, then coughed half of it back on to the table. He wiped his mouth with a smile of embarra.s.sment. 'Mr Burden don't allow liquor in the house.'

'So I hear.' I took a long draw on my pipe. 'But he allows Alice in his bed.'

Ned's handsome, open face flashed with anger. 'That . . . that is not true,' he floundered. He was a terrible liar.

'The walls are very thin, Ned.'

He struggled for a moment, loyal to his master. But I could see the desire to confide in someone playing through him, and there was anger there too. His fists, resting on the table, were clenched tight. 'It's wicked, sir,' he said at last. 'Alice Dunn is a respectable woman. But if she doesn't . . . If she refused him . . . She's nowhere to go. She'd end up like them.' His eyes flickered to the girls at the lawyers' table, gowns pulled down to their waist. Hands working under loosened breeches.

I laid down my pipe. 'He's taking her against her will?'

'It started a few weeks ago, in secret. We didn't know. Then Alice cried thief the other night from his bed. We all heard her.' He hung his head. 'Now he don't bother to keep quiet. I scolded Alice for it, told her it was a sin. She swore Mr Burden made her do it. She said he makes her cry out so we can hear. I don't know. I suppose . . . perhaps she lies . . .'

But I could tell he did not believe that. There were tears in his eyes, as if the shame were his and not his master's. And in truth how could he stand to lie abed at night and listen to it? We had laughed, Kitty and I, when we heard Burden and Alice together. It made me sick to think of it.

And what of Burden's children, Judith and Stephen? Did they know the truth did they understand? I hoped to G.o.d they did not. I thought of Judith crouched on the stairs that night, spitting Alice's name as if it tasted foul upon her tongue. And Stephen, threatening to tell Gonson what he saw. What he truly saw that night.

I felt a terrible rage growing inside me. This was the man who was spreading foul lies about me? The man who dared to judge me a villain? I closed my eyes. How I hated him in that moment. And the thought came to me before I could stop myself. I wish that he were dead. 'That is terrible, Ned. How can you bear it?'

Ned rolled his empty gla.s.s around and around in a despondent fas.h.i.+on. He had the hands of a busy carpenter battered and grazed, quick and clever. 'There's something wrong with him. He ain't himself. I've been his apprentice for seven years. Six days a week working at his side. He promised me a paid position once I'd finished my apprentices.h.i.+p. And now it's done . . .' His voice fractured. 'He's ordered me to leave by the end of the week.'

'My G.o.d!' To promise a position for seven years, to benefit from Ned's labour for all that time and then withdraw the offer when the apprentices.h.i.+p was over? It was nothing more than slavery. 'Can he not afford to pay you?'

'Ten times over! There's no sense to it. How will he manage without me? The old fool can't survive on his own, not at his age.'

'Perhaps he expects to hand the business to Stephen?'

'Stephen? He couldn't lift a hammer.' Ned's face crinkled in amus.e.m.e.nt and I was struck once again by his kind nature. I would have felt bitter and resentful in his place. Ned seemed more perplexed. As if his master had been replaced with a stranger. It was the puzzle of it all that seemed to trouble him the most. 'What am I to do, Mr Hawkins?'

'I shouldn't worry, Ned. You're an honest man with a good trade. Strong and healthy . . .' I patted his arm. My G.o.d, strong was right. His muscles were hard as iron. 'You'll have no trouble finding a position.'

'But it's my home, sir.' He paused, eyes filled with tears once more. 'I thought he was proud of me. But he doesn't care if I starve in the street. Seven years. Seven years for nothing.'

I frowned in sympathy. Poured him another gla.s.s.

By the time we'd reached the bottom of a second punch bowl of which Ned had drunk half a gla.s.s I had boiled myself into a drunken fury. How dare Burden use Ned in such a cruel fas.h.i.+on? And how dare he blacken my reputation in the neighbourhood? Leaving the coffeehouse, I stumbled out into the piazza, Ned trailing anxiously at my heels. The cold night air slapped at my face and the cobbles buckled at my feet. I had not felt this drunk for a long time. I had barely touched a drop since my fight in St James's Park, and I had forgotten to eat supper.

When I reached Burden's house, I pounded my fist against the door.

'Burden! Come out and face me, you son of a c.u.n.t!' What had I just said? Son of a . . . what did that mean? I shook my head, clearing it a little.

Ned put a hand on my shoulder. 'Mr Hawkins, sir . . .'

He was strong, but there is no one stronger than an outraged drunk. I wrested myself free and kicked the door, slamming my heel into the wood. When no one came, I kicked it again. I kicked and pounded at it until the blood ran from my knuckles. And then I drew my sword and slammed the pommel into the wood.

At last the bolts swung back and Burden stood in the doorway, angry and defiant until he saw the sword in my fist. 'What is this?'

I slotted the sword back in my belt after several failed attempts. It is a hard procedure when there is more punch in one's veins than blood. 'You have been spreading lies. Vile, scoundralous lies.' I paused. One of those words was not, necessarily, a word.

'Ned,' Burden called, beckoning him inside.

Ned shouldered his way past, looking sheepish. As Burden moved to close the door I pushed back, glaring at him through the crack. 'How dare you judge me,' I hissed. 'When you're f.u.c.king Alice Dunn against her will?'

Burden looked stunned at this but he recovered fast enough. He grinned, baring his teeth. 'Mr Gonson visited the Marshalsea today. One of the turnkeys swears you killed a man.'

And of a sudden, I was sober.

'They'll hang you for it,' he crowed. 'That is a promise, Hawkins.'

He closed the door in my face.

Fear washed through me. It wasn't true. It wasn't possible. I was innocent. But I had made enough enemies in gaol and I could think of several turnkeys who would be happy to perjure themselves for a price. Or worse tell Gonson what had really happened. Oh, G.o.d no. The ground pitched beneath my feet and I had to clutch the wall to steady myself.

Now the heat of fury had left me I felt exhausted. My hands were throbbing. I stared down in confusion and saw to my horror that my knuckles were raw and b.l.o.o.d.y from pounding at Burden's door. Oh G.o.d. What had I done? The street was alive behind me, summoned by the drumming of my fists. The girls in the brothel across the road grinned and waved as I caught their eye while our more respectable neighbours stood frozen on their doorsteps, mouths open in shock. They hadn't heard Burden's accusation, but they'd seen me beat down his door, raving like a lunatic. With a sword in my hand.

I hurried home, closing the door on the world. Collapsed on the stairs. Tore off my hat and wig and loosened my cravat, thinking hard. I should flee to the continent set off tonight before Gonson could arrange a warrant. I leaped up the stairs, then stopped on the landing. Leave without Kitty? Impossible. If Gonson spoke to the wrong people she would be in just as much danger.

Eliot would help us if we told him the truth. Perhaps he had guessed some of it. Yes that was the best course of action, at least it seemed to be. My head was still muddled by the drink. I collected a few things for Kitty some clothes, her father's papers, her jewellery and all the money I could find in the house. I had just begun on my own clothes when there was a sharp rap at the door.

I cursed and moved to the window. A carriage stood outside the shop, guarded by two men with clubs. My heart swooped like a hawk. I was too late. Another guard stood at the door, a musket at his shoulder. He glanced up and saw me at the window. 'Mr Hawkins. Open up, sir!'

With a rush of relief, I recognised him as the guard I'd saved in St James's Park. These must be Henrietta Howard's men.

I hurried downstairs, gathering my wig and hat from the floor. As I opened the door, the guard gave a short bow and beckoned me to the carriage.

I gestured inside. 'I will leave a note for-'

'-no time,' he interrupted.

I hesitated, suddenly suspicious. 'Where are we going?'

The guard signalled to the others. In a second they had seized me and slung me into the carriage. I tumbled to the floor, a pile of clothes and a jumble of limbs. I struggled up on to the bench while the guard settled back on the opposite seat and slammed the door tight. With a soft cry, the driver urged the horses forward and we raced away, down Drury Lane towards the Strand. I held on to my seat with my bruised hands, feeling somewhat dizzy from the swaying carriage and the speed of my capture.

The guard tapped his swollen jaw. 'Yours is healing well. But you're a young man.' He grinned, revealing a fresh gap in his teeth. With his flattened nose and old smallpox scars, his face was a brutal sight, but he seemed friendly enough. 'Budge,' he said, holding out his hand.

I shook it. 'Am I in trouble, Mr Budge?'

He threw his head back and laughed. 'Up to your neck, Mr Hawkins.'

Chapter Seven.

As we reached the entrance to St James's Palace, Budge ordered me to lie on the floor and threw a coa.r.s.e wool blanket over me. It stank of horse. There was a short exchange with the guards, and then the carriage rolled forward again, rattling across a large courtyard. The horses made a sharp turn and we rolled to a halt. I felt a tap on my shoulder. 'Wait here.' I began to sit up, but Budge pushed me back with a sharp prod.

I lay cramped in the dark, trying my best to prepare myself for my unexpected appointment with the king's mistress. What in heaven was Mrs Howard thinking, to smuggle me into the palace in such a fas.h.i.+on? She must be quite desperate. The thought made me uneasy. She may not have the power to help Mr Gay find a suitable court position, but I had no doubt she could make my life uncomfortable if she chose. As if it were not uncomfortable enough, lying beneath a horse blanket in the freezing cold.

I s.h.i.+fted position, then winced as the hilt of my sword poked against my hip. Deep in my pocket, my silver fob watch ticked softly. It had been a gift from Samuel Fleet. What would my old cell mate make of all this business? Why, he'd be delighted of course perfectly thrilled. Fleet had lived for trouble. Died for it too.

How late was it? How much time had pa.s.sed? It was too dark to read my watch. I couldn't risk waiting much longer I must reach Kitty and flee the city with her tonight. Perhaps I should leave now, escape into the dark city streets. But how would I explain myself to the guards at the gate house? How would they react if they discovered me creeping through the king's palace with a sword at my hip? Knowing my luck, they'd charge me with treason and burn me at the stake.

Footsteps. I shrank beneath my blanket, but it was only a groom, come to free the horses and lower the shafts. The carriage tilted and I slid along the floor, cracking my ankle bone against the seat. I uttered a low curse. The footsteps drew closer. A lantern flared at the window, flooding the carriage with light. I lay still, holding my breath for a long, tense minute. Then the carriage darkened and I was alone again.

Another hour pa.s.sed before Budge returned. By now I was quite sober and my head was pounding. I threw off the blanket and stumbled from the carriage, stretching my aching limbs and back.

'Too tall,' Budge observed, as if I might want to rectify the problem. 'Apologies for the wait. The king. Speechifying.'

We moved quickly through the stables, the horses stamping and snuffling in the dark. The courtyard beyond was lit with lanterns and torches, bright after my long vigil in the dark. I blinked up at the rambling maze of red brick buildings that formed the palace, marvelling at it all. In spite of my misgivings, I could not help but feel a flicker of excitement.

We crossed the yard, pausing in the shadows as a couple of footmen rushed by with lanterns. When all was still again we turned towards a discreet, unguarded side door. Budge unlocked it and beckoned me forward.

'Quiet now,' he breathed, though we had not spoken a word since I left the carriage.

The corridor beyond was very dark and we had no light, so we were forced to stretch out our hands and brush the walls with our fingertips to guide the way. The walls were smooth and dry. I'd heard St James' was a crumbling, dank old place but it seemed solid enough to me.

My foot grazed against something in the dark and I scuffled forward, almost colliding with Budge. He gave a tiny hiss of annoyance. Sam would be silent down here, I thought. All this time I'd been giving him lessons I should have asked him to teach me some of his own tricks. After a few moments I caught a dim light ahead. We had reached an old back staircase, bowed from the heavy tread of servants labouring up and down. Candles flickered low in their sconces.

On the first landing we pa.s.sed a fine porcelain chamber pot, the lid left carelessly askew. I wrinkled my nose at the stench. We must have reached the living quarters. So I was to meet Mrs Howard in her private rooms, with a pounding headache and stinking of horse blanket. Excellent.

At the top of the stairs, Budge relieved me of my sword and dagger, then led me into a small antechamber. The walls were covered with tapestries and silk hangings that shone softly in the candlelight. Silk rugs covered the burnished oak floors. A tall cabinet held a collection of books bound in green leather and embossed with gold. The room was so rich and opulent and such a contrast from the back stairs we'd just climbed that it took me a moment to breathe. And all this for the king's mistress. Perhaps Mrs Howard was in better favour than Eliot thought.

Budge knocked on a door at the far end of the room and disappeared into a second chamber, leaving me alone. I took the opportunity to practise my speech, pacing the rug with a soft tread. 'Lady Howard I trust you are recovered from your ordeal. I was honoured to come to your aid, my lady but I regret that I am now caught in troubles of my own . . .' I faltered, and stood still, a question forming in my mind.

How had she found me?

I had not given her my name. She had scarcely seen my face in the dark. Enough to say, what? That I was a young gentleman. Long-limbed. Dressed in a black suit and red waistcoat.

So. How had she found me?

James Fleet. It was the only possible answer. Mrs Howard had hired him, after all using Budge as her messenger, no doubt. Fleet must have given my name to Budge and told him where to find me. That was unsettling.

And now I began to suspect that there was a deeper game being played here. My task had been to meet with Mrs Howard that night and hear her story, no more. So how was it that I found myself being smuggled into the king's palace in the middle of the night?

I had no time to think further on the matter. Budge reappeared, followed by Mrs Howard. She was dressed in a rose-pink gown fitted close to her waist, a short strand of pearls at her throat. Her thick chestnut hair was tied in a simple knot and decorated with a piece of lace. She must be nearing forty, but she seemed much younger blessed with a fresh complexion and a graceful figure. And very pretty indeed.

I bowed low. 'My lady.'

She inclined her head. The terror of the attack in the park was long buried her expression was mild, her blue eyes steady. I'd heard that her nickname at court was 'The Swiss' because she remained always calm and neutral, both in her appearance and her opinions. The Swiss. It suited her.

'Mr Hawkins. How kind of you to come.' Her voice soft and seemingly quite sincere. But she was a lady of the court. She must have had a good deal of practice, seeming sincere. She held out a slim, gloved hand. I bowed again and kissed it. As I stepped back, I searched for the woman I had seen in the park. But this Henrietta was quite composed, her smooth features set in a polite mask. Was this what pleased King George? A pretty bauble, bland and sweet. Well, he was said to be a dull sort of fellow.

'How brave you were,' she said, eyes brightening with admiration.

I decided she was not quite as bland as I had first thought. 'It was an honour to serve you, madam.'

'There are few men fearless enough to stand against my husband in his rage.'

'Your husband!' I cried, before I could stop myself. That monster was her husband? I could scarce believe it. I tried to remember what I knew of Charles Howard. He'd been a servant to the old king, I thought. A drunken rake by all accounts, with a cruel temper . . . but I had not realised how cruel. The man I had met in the park had been half-wild.

'I thank you, sir, for saving me from him. I was sure he meant to kill me. He has threatened it before.' Her voice was quite steady, but as she spoke she folded her hands together. A subtle sign, but one I had seen at the gaming tables. She was afraid, and fighting with every breath to conceal it. So terribly afraid even here in the palace.

She drifted towards a tapestry on the wall. I put my hands behind my back and followed her, playing the gentleman. She had taken so much trouble to hide her feelings, it would be ungallant to expose them. 'A fine piece,' I nodded, though I did not care a fig for tapestries. Could I dare hope she had summoned me here solely to thank me? That would suit me very well, if she might hurry it along. Although payment would not go amiss.

I thought of Gonson, gathering his evidence. I did not have time to admire old needlework, even with someone as pretty and intriguing as Henrietta Howard.

'Madam, I am glad you are recovered. But I am not sure how I may a.s.sist you?'

Her lips parted in surprise. 'Oh! I have not summoned you here, sir. It is my mistress who wishes to speak with you.'

'Mr Hawkins,' Budge called across the room. 'Her Majesty the Queen is waiting.'

The queen. I knew of course that Mrs Howard was a Woman of the Bedchamber, but had not thought for a moment that it was her mistress who had ordered me to the palace, and under such strange circ.u.mstances. I stared from Budge to Mrs Howard in bewilderment. What the devil did the Queen of England want of me? Perhaps I was dreaming. Asleep, dead drunk at Moll's, with my head upon the table.

'Mr Hawkins,' Budge prompted.

There was no time to compose myself. Brus.h.i.+ng the horse hair from my coat, I followed Mrs Howard through the door into a larger room.

Queen Caroline sat on a red damask sofa, knitting. Her pale, straight brows were drawn in concentration as she bent over her work. A heaped plate of candied fruit rested on a table at her elbow. Behind her lay two long sash windows, velvet curtains pulled back. They would offer a fine view of the park in the daytime. Now, the world outside was black and jewelled with stars.

The Queen of England. This was no dream, but still I could not quite believe my eyes. All the world knew that Queen Caroline of Ansbach was the great power in this family; everyone save her husband. Those famous, mocking lines played about my head. You may strut, dapper George, but 'twill all be in vain, We all know 'tis Queen Caroline, not you, that reign.

Mrs Howard glided behind her queen, the modest servant, attentive and silent. Budge stood sentinel by the fire. I glanced at him for instruction, but he gazed ahead, shoulders back. Mrs Howard gave a subtle gesture, bidding me to wait. I stood with one leg half behind the other, poised to bow.

The only sound was the fire crackling in the hearth and the knitting needles clicking back and forth. The queen twirled the wool with her thick fingers and said nothing. There was nothing to do but consider her, and doubtless that was her intent. Let the speechless fool gawp for a while until he regains his senses. Her dress was plain and somewhat sombre a mantua gown in dark-blue silk matched with a black quilted petticoat. There was a prodigious dollop of black lace fixed atop her head, quite mysterious in its design and almost comical.

She had once been as fair as her husband's mistress fairer, in fact. A quarter-century ago every prince in Europe had wanted her hand. Fragments of her beauty still remained her thick mane of greying blonde hair bouncing in ringlets down her shoulders, her b.u.t.ter cream complexion. The half-smile that played lazily on her pillow lips. But she had grown stout from childbirth and a sweet tooth. She seemed inflated somehow, swollen to twice the size of her rival, standing quietly behind her. No doubt that was why she wore a mantua, the bodice loose and unboned not a fas.h.i.+onable style, but a good deal more comfortable.

'Howard,' the queen said without looking up. 'Bring me the papers on this boy.' Her voice was warm and rich, laced with a strong Bavarian accent. I felt the hairs on the back of my neck rise.

Mrs Howard crossed to a writing table piled high with books and correspondence. The queen paused in her knitting and began to count the st.i.tches to herself in French, tapping her finger along the needle. The work was very neat. She gave a satisfied grunt and at last fixed me with a look, holding her knitting to her nose like a woollen veil. A deliberate, playful gesture that somehow merely confirmed her power. The world was hers to play in as she chose. She was chuckling to herself as I made my bow, but I could feel her eyes las.h.i.+ng over me like a whip.

'Oh, mon dieu. Up! Up!' she said, after I'd bent myself double for a long, back-breaking minute. As if she had not been the one keeping me there. Mrs Howard gave a curtsey and handed a sheaf of papers to her mistress. What a curious, uncomfortable situation for both women. I wondered why the queen allowed it.

'Thomas Hawkins,' the queen said, rolling my name around her mouth as if it were one of her sugared confections. She opened up a letter and read the first few lines or pretended to. She folded the letter and dropped it on the sofa beside her. Settled back against a cus.h.i.+on. 'Well, sir I hear you fought a great battle in the park. Saved poor Howard from an unhappy reunion with her husband. He is a beast, of course quite the worst man in England. Mrs Howard has not been as fortunate as I in her choice of husband.' Her eyes gleamed. She had placed emphasis upon the word choice. Henrietta had chosen to marry Charles Howard.

The queen glanced at her servant, her husband's mistress, her once-friend. 'How long have you been married, Howard? I forget.'

I doubted that very much.

'Two and twenty years, Your Majesty. I was sixteen years old.' Mrs Howard's voice was clear and perfectly composed. But there must be pain somewhere, buried deep. Twenty-two years, married to such a man! How had she survived him all this time?