Gold: A Bandia Novel Part 16

"Where have you been?" I ask.

Sherri shrugs. "Here, mostly. I figured the last place they'd expect me to go is back home."

"You didn't answer the call to arms." If Sherri was here, why didn't she go to the gateway?

"What is that supposed to mean? I'm not the one who bonded with a Son and got Sasha killed."

She blames me for Sasha's death? "You're the one who decided to attack without knowing exactly who and what you were up against. And if I recall right, I saved your life."

Sherri rolls her eyes. "Fine. We'll call it even." Her eyes drift to the doorway. "Is Liam hot or what?"

"How did you meet him?"

She laughs. "I answered the call."

"But you weren't there."

Sherri stands up and stretches. She glances over at Austin, but he doesn't look up. "You weren't there," she mocks my voice. "Really, Brianna, are you still so clueless?" She walks to the doorway. "You were the one who missed the call. Even the hybrid was there."

Then she disappears down the hall.

I turn to Austin. "What does she mean? I didn't miss the call. I was there, on the beach, when the Gateway opened. I was the only one."

"Maybe he called them more recently? After your powers disappeared?" Austin leans forward. "She's a bit of a true believer, that one."

"A bit? You missed out on her. She would've fought like the devil for you."

"I might've killed her myself before she got that far."

But he's smiling, and I can't help but think that Sherri is everything that Austin wanted me to be.

"You say that now. But at the time, all you wanted was to find a bandia to fight for you. Look at her. She's perfect for you."

"If I didn't know better, I'd think you were jealous."

Am I? I freeze in place.

Austin shakes his head. "I did find Sherri. I was at Hunters the night she attacked the Sons. But I didn't go after her, Brianna. Not even when it was clear that you would never fight." Austin reaches across the couch and lifts a strand of hair from my shoulder. "You thought I was looking for a bandia, any bandia, to carry on the cause. As it turns out, I was only looking for you." He twists the lock of hair around his finger. "My fate is tied to yours, and yours alone."

I throw my arms around his neck and pull him to me. I crush my mouth against his. He answers with a kiss so deep it fills me with an ache for more. He pushes me down on the couch, letting his weight settle in all the right places. My hands find his hair, then his s.h.i.+rt, then his waistband, until my fingers brush the warm skin underneath. His hands are on me too, drawing circles that make my heart race and my breath come in hard gasps.

I want, I want, I want. It's the only thought that I can manage in the flood of sensation. I want to feel every part of Austin. I want him to feel every part of me.

"G.o.d," Austin says, his lips tracing the line of my bra. "Please say you want this as much as I do.

I smile into his gold-brown eyes. "I want this, Austin. I want you."

His lips find mine. As he kisses me, I can feel the emotion behind it. Whatever Austin's done, I want him to love me. I want him to show me everything.

I can give him this. I can give him this part of me at least.

Austin stops kissing me. "What?" His breath is coming fast, but his eyes are serious.

I try to read the question there. "Don't stop."

"You hesitated."

"I didn't." I lean up and nip his neck.

"d.a.m.n it." He sits up and straightens his s.h.i.+rt.

I push a tangle of hair away from my face. "What's wrong?"

He closes his eyes and opens them again. "Can you tell me you love me?"

"What?"

"That sounds like a no."

"Austin, please."

"Definitely a no." He stands up. The little furrow at the top of his nose is back. "I know I'm asking too much. You can't forget what I've done. And I'm going to waste whatever time I have with you because of these stupid human emotions."

"They're not stupid. They're kind of sweet."

"I'm pretty sure no one has ever called me sweet."

"In how many thousand years?"

He laughs. "Watch yourself." His eyes find mine.

I can see the barely contained desire in them. Oh yes, I want him. But love? I thought I loved Blake. I did love Blake. But now I wonder if I was confusing l.u.s.t with love. In the end, neither one of us fought very hard to be together. I threatened his sister and ran off to Ireland without even trying to stay and make him understand. Blake may have kept the Sons from killing me, but no question, he expected me to help the Sons find Sherri Milliken. Without the bond, we were quick to challenge each other's real motives.

There was no trust. That can't be love.

I trust Austin. Even after all he's done, I trust him with my secrets. That's not the same as loving him, but it's closer, maybe.

I stand up and close the distance between us. I take his hand. "Can you say you love me?"

"What?" He's caught off guard.

"I guess that's a no then."

"I told you, I've loved you since you threw that quarter into my lap."

"You believe in love at first sight?"

"No, of course not. But it wasn't the first time I saw you. And there were times I had my doubts. But fate will out."

"Doubts?"

"Let's see. You set me up with your best friend. Twice, I might add. Then you let me nearly get killed by Jonah before you finally stepped in. Oh, and there is the small matter of you falling in love with someone else."

"Okay, I get it."

"I'm not done. You tried to kill me with those d.a.m.n fireb.a.l.l.s. And when that didn't work, you lured me to the gateway and banished me for a thousand years." His lips curve into that crooked smile. "Perhaps I should rethink this."

"You're right. Why do you even like me?" I'm only half-joking.

"Don't you know?" He kneels in front of me, bringing his hand to the back of my neck. His thumb strokes my throat. "You have the heart of a warrior, yet you long for peace. Even so, you fight fiercely for those you love, no matter what it costs you personally. You are, quite simply, a G.o.ddess."

I have to remember to breathe. "Okay. I might like you a little."

Austin kisses my forehead, before he stands up. "Let me know when you're sure."

TWENTY-EIGHT.

Something Austin said stays with me all night. When I wake up, it's still there, a niggling thought that won't let me go.

It wasn't the first time I saw you.

The night I met him at his party wasn't the first time he saw me. Had he come into Magic Beans with Blake before we met at his party? I don't think so. The magic in my bracelet made me invisible to guys then. No one looked at me. I definitely would have noticed if he saw me.

Does he remember meeting me as Aaron? Is that why he took me to the ruin?

I storm through the house, past the living room and down the hall to Austin's office. I barge in without knocking.

But it's not Austin hunched over the antique desk. It's Liam.

"Well that's more like it," he says, taking in my wild hair and fury. "Perhaps you are a fighter after all."

"What are you doing here?"

"Planning the new world order. Would you like to help?"

I can't stop the eye roll.

Liam raises his eyebrows. "I see you will have to learn your place the hard way." He lifts a finger and a shock of lightening arcs in the air.

I reach for my power, but there's nothing. I can only duck behind a chair as the lightening flies at my head. It barely misses me, exploding with a crack into the floor beside me.

Liam stands. "I'm disappointed. I thought you'd put up more of a fight."

I'm helpless, crouched on the floor while Liam walks toward me, electric currents pulsing around him.

I scramble for a small statute of a rearing horse on the table next to the chair. It's heavy, probably bra.s.s. I lob it at Liam's head.

He laughs as it glances off his shoulder. The room goes bright white and a loud crack reverberates in my ears. I barely feel the hard floor as my head hits it.

The next thing I'm aware of is a p.r.i.c.kly numbness, like my entire body has fallen asleep. The pins and needles jab at the surface, pain cutting through as my nerves come back to life.

"Brianna." Austin's voice sounds far away. A damp cloth presses against my forehead.

I blink. The flash of daylight is enough to trigger a throbbing pain in my head. I grit my teeth against the metallic taste in my mouth, biting back a scream. I try opening my eyes again. I'm still on the floor of the office, propped up against Austin, who sits on the floor behind me.

"What happened?"

I try to remember. At first it's all a blurry dream. Liam. Lightening. Why I came here in the first place. "You used to go by Aaron."

"There have been many Lord Lorcans."

"But Aaron was the last one. Before you were banished."

"True enough."

"You were with Gwyn."

His whole body tenses beside me.

"I saw you with her."

"Ah." Austin leans his head back against the wall so hard it makes a loud smack that makes my head hurt even more. "A thousand years ago."

"She was Danu's daughter. A first generation, right? She had no power." Which means Austin didn't need her to fight the Sons. He wasn't using her. I know I shouldn't care about something that happened so long ago, but I do. And then a sick thought pops into my head that I can't quite shake. What if he married her? What if they had children?

"She was my grandmother. To the hundredth power, but still." I can't hide the panic in my voice.

He shakes his head. "We weren't together, Brianna. We never even-" He stops himself. "Why am I telling you this?"

"This is what people do. We tell each other about our pasts. It's how we get to know each other."

He wraps his arms around me. "You want to know about Gwyn?"

I nod.

"A harmless flirtation. Nothing to speak of really. I kissed her once."

"That's it?"

He sighs. "I met someone else."

Oh G.o.d. It's not just Gwyn. I shouldn't care. I shouldn't need to know about girls he was with a thousand years ago. I shouldn't care period. "Oh."

"Are you jealous?"

"A little." The admission scares me. The bandia in me is alive and well, powers or none.

He laughs.