Damia. Part 19

'Do it again, please?' Amr's voice was hoa.r.s.e, small.

'Oh, it was great!' Damia answered. Amr moved an arm to encircle her but Damia moved - painfully away. 'I'm too sore, Amr. Too tired.

None of the tapes mentioned that.' 'Nor what you've done to me,' he replied, eyes dull.

Anger crept into them. 'Have you no notion of what you've done to me?' His fingers clenched into fists. Tears welled in his eyes, tears of anger, of honour lost, of despair. 'Do you?' His voice grew louder until he was shouting: 'Do you? Do you? Wh.o.r.e, s.l.u.t! b.i.t.c.h!' With a look of pure terror he caught his hand mid-stroke as it moved unwilled to strike at her.

Afra! Damia cried in despair.

She disappeared as Amr fought to produce an apology.

Gone, he closed his eyes and cried softly in deep sobs, curled into a foetal ball.

Nothing was mentioned about hating after loving! Damia sobbed to Afra as he finished towelling her off and pulled her into his arms to wrap the towel around her. She rested her head on his chest and bawled. It was so.. so... and then he screamed at me!

You were careful, weren't you? Afra asked her, keeping his tone calm and soothing.

Of course I was careful! I've had the implant for months now!

Damia retorted angrily. Afra pushed himself away from her, tilted her head up so her eyes met his.

'Damia, you kept your s.h.i.+elds up, didn't you?' Afra asked.

's.h.i.+elds? Afra, we made love!' Afra's expression altered, pain flickered across his face.

'You were in a hotel?' Damia nodded dully. 'The one across the street from Central?' She nodded again.

What room number?

Afra! she protested.

We have to know how Amr's handling this, he said, then strengthened his 'pathing. Gollee, we've got an emergency.

A m.u.f.fled response came back to him. Afra made a face.

I need you to look after a T-9, Amr Tusel. He's over at the Excelsior. Afra paused, his face expressionless as he looked down at Damia. I think he's been burnt out.

Gollee Gren became instantly alert. I'll handle it, Afra.

'Burnt out?' Damia echoed aloud. 'Afra, he was fine!' 'Was he fine when you left him, Damia?' Afra asked her softly. 'Did you guard your Talent when you made love?' Damia was devastated. 'n.o.body told me!' 'I did,' Afra said quietly, lips thin. 'I said, be careful.' 'I thought you meant-' Damia broke off, finally absorbing the enormity of her recklessness. 'Will he be all right? Will he recover?' 'Possibly,' Afra hedged. But she c.o.c.ked her head at him challengingly.

'Probably not,' he admitted, recognizing the morality involved.

'Oh, Afra!' Damia wailed, throwing herself in his arms.

I'll never love again!

'I wouldn't say "never", Damia,' Afra said at his driest.

He picked her up and carried her over to the couch. 'Just never be so careless ever again.' He placed her beside him on the couch, cradling her torso with his arms. 'Love, Damia, but be caring and careful with it.

No, I'll never love again, Damia mumbled earnestly as her 'voice' faded with fatigue. Afra made no reply, holding the youngster until she drifted into sleep. Then, very carefully, he insinuated a tendril of thought to ease her pain.

Afra was aware of Damia's gaze before he opened his eyes.

He looked down at her, still resting on his chest and met her piercing blue eyes. He gave her a slight smile. 'Bet your muscles are sore.' Damia snorted. 'From sleeping this way or from before?' 'Both.' Damia regarded him for a long moment, then admitted: 'It could have been you-' Afra silenced her with a finger to her lips. 'Don't.' She examined the finger critically, then ducked away from it to kiss it, smiling up at him. The smile faded.

'Have you heard about Amr?' Afra nodded solemnly. 'He's resting now, in hospital.' He looked down at her. 'I will teach you control.' Damia bit her lip. 'Would I have done that to you, if we had-' Afra shook his head. 'We didn't, Damia.' 'It could have been you!' The admission was torn from her lips. She buried herself against his chest. 'Oh, Afra, don't you love me?' Afra cradled her head tenderly to his chest.

'I wanted to, you know,' Damia went on, implacably young and naive. 'I tried-' 'I know,' Afra soothed.

She pulled her head back against his hand to look him in the eyes.

'You knew? And you didn't... And I And Amr?' she spluttered, growing furious.

Again Afra put a finger to her lips but Damia wrapped her teeth about it, biting hard. Her eyes locked on his as she bit harder and harder but Afra's expression didn't change. When she tasted salty blood in her mouth, Damia spat the finger out.

Tears dripped out of Afra's eyes as he coldly examined the bleeding teeth marks.

'I'm glad it hurt!' Damia said, hot with fury, with embarra.s.sment, with guilt.

Afra flicked his eyes to her. 'That isn't what hurts, Damia.' She broke free of his grasp angrily, strode to the bathroom, pulled on one of his long s.h.i.+rts, grabbed a first aid box and threw at him on the way out, 'Here! That's for your hand. I can't do anything for your heart.' The door, being automatic, would not slam but Damia kicked it with a resounding thud to achieve the same effect.

'A word with you, young miss!' The tight voice of Gollee Gren shocked Damia so much she jumped.

'Gollee! What are you doing here?' she asked, looking around the lounge at Callisto Station. 'It's not Dad-' Then she remembered.

'Amr?' 'He's all right.' Gren dismissed the issue. He grabbed her, dragged her over to a booth, sat down beside her. 'Just what do you think you are doing, anyway?' 'What do you mean?' Gren swore.

'After all he's done for you. He's covered up for your "tricks", he's watched over you, lied and you - you're not even worth your name!' 'Who?' Damia cried in confusion.

'Who?' Gren snorted. 'Trust you to not know! Don't you think?

Don't you see?' He shook his head in a vain attempt to throw off his anger. It did not work. He let out a deep breath. 'I got the pictures back from medics.' He nodded to emphasize his point. 'He said that one of the c.o.o.nies had bit him but I know those marks. Even when you try to bite his hand off he protects you!' 'afra?' Damia exclaimed.

'He doesn't even know I exist! That cold-blooded green-skinned yellow eyed-' She searched for further epithets, found none, 'Capellan!' 'You don't think about anyone but yourself, do you?' Gren snapped back.

'Damia, Damia, poor Damia!' He narrowed his eyes critically at her.

'Well, what about Afra?

How do you think he felt when his best friend's daughter comes on to him? Don't you know what you did?' 'He turned me down!' Damia exclaimed, wondering how Gren could have known that and amazed at herself for blurting out such an unsavoury episode.

'You were as obvious as the sun! He had no choice, even if he had wanted to!' Gren said hotly. 'But that's nothing.

To punish him for it you go off and maim some poor-' 'THAT'S NOT TRUE!' Damia shouted at the top of her lungs, tears of rage rolling down her cheeks.

'Isn't it?' Gren asked quietly. 'Think carefully before you answer, Damia Gwyn-Raven. And when you are done, you go to him and you ask him very politely to teach you control.' 'I won't! Never!' She was so furious she whispered, visibly trembling to suppress the things she wanted to do, could do to her accuser 'Your parents don't know about that night, or Amr, Damia grinned. 'That's normal!' he said, speaking as low and as intensely. 'Yet.' He rose, turning back to her in parting. 'Now, you apologize to him and you learn from him how to control yourself.' 'Or you'll do what?' Damia sneered tauntingly.

Gren looked her over critically. 'I won't tell your father.' And he stomped off leaving Damia to wonder why that promise struck her as so sinister.

'Larak!' Damia cried joyfully, running to embrace her brother.

'Whatever are you doing here?' 'Afra sent for me,' Larak told her, hugging her happily.

He shook his head. 'I hadn't realized that Mom and Dad took his advice so seriously.

'Your voice!' Damia declared, recognizing differences over the past year. 'You've grown.

'I'm not a little boy any more, Damia,' Larak replied, his voice now deepened with adolescence. 'I've put on three inches in seven months! I'll catch up with you soon!' Damia laughed. 'And pa.s.s me out, I'm sure!' She pursed her lips. 'Why did Afra send for you?' 'Didn't he tell you?' 'We're not exchanging confidences these days.

Damia's response was curt, blocking any further conversation.

Larak ignored the implied injunction. He blew out his breath.

'That's new. I thought Afra was your extra special friend.' 'I've grown out of such a childish dependence.' Larak gave her an appraising look which turned into a different sort of look. He nodded appreciatively. 'If you weren't my sister, I'd ask you for a date!

I'm not the only one who's grown up!' Damia shook her head.

'Thank you. I'm not much into dates now, though.' 'Poor men!' Larak exclaimed. He hefted his carisak.

'Well, lead on! I'm starving!' Brian Ackerman caught them up in the canteen. Larak waved a fork at him agreeably, his mouth working through an overlarge hunk of food.

Ackerman shook his head at the change in the young man. 'I nearly didn't recognize you!' 'Even with the typical Raven features? I'm hurt!' Larak had the same easy camaraderie his father possessed. Brian recalled with surprise that he had known Jeff Raven for over twenty years now and the Rowan for slightly longer. At seventy-five, Ackerman was beginning to feel his morning exercises but beyond that, and going totally grey, he felt himself to be much the same man as the one who had met Jeff Raven those many years ago. And the one who had, in desperation, sent his resignation to Peter Reidinger because he could not cope with the young Rowan. The thought of the Rowan made him flick his eyes at Damia. Her features were a delicate blur of the best of the Rowan and the best of Raven but she favoured more her mother in moods, temperament and emotion.

Yes, a lot like her mother, Ackerman decided, only more powerful.

He wondered if the Rowan was really aware of her daughter's psychic potential. He had his suspicions but Jeff had tactfully kept his counsel on that score.

'What brings you here?' Damia asked with an unspoken accusation in her tone.

'I've got new station a.s.signments,' Ackerman replied.

'Station a.s.signments?' Larak was startled. 'Aren't we a bit too young?' 'That's never stopped you before!' Ackerman exclaimed, a smile forming on his lips. He nodded at the youngster.

'I've read your transcripts, Larak. You're going to be a great twic some day!' 'Twic?' Larak was puzzled, Damia startled.

Ackerman nodded at her. 'It was a name your sister coined, stands for: second-in-command. Only she saw 21C and p.r.o.nounced it twic.' He paused. 'Afra must've liked it because he's used it ever since and it's stuck.' Larak turned a fond look at his sister but Damia looked as though the words offended her. 'So, what's up?' Larak asked, ignoring his sister's expression.

'Altair's up,' Ackerman replied, turning to Damia and winking at her. 'You're a.s.signed there for six months, to work with Torshan and Saggoner. I think Earth Prime's doing what Reidinger did to him starting you on a round of Towers to give you experience.' 'Gren put you up to this, didn't he?' Damia asked, her eyes snapping with blue sparks, Ackerman recoiled from the verbal onslaught, confused.

'Huh?' 'Where did these "a.s.signments" originate?' she demanded.

'Headquarters, on Earth, where else?' Ackerman returned, remembering belatedly how poor the Rowan's manners had been when she was angered by something.

What's up? he asked himself. 'You've done very well here, Damia.

But it's time for you to get about more.' He recoiled a bit at the anger she didn't quite suppress.

'When?' Her question was delivered in a flat tone but both men could sense the tension within her.

Ackerman blinked. 'I guess you can go as soon as you like, Damia, but there's no exact date given.' 'Well, I suppose I should be grateful for time to pack,' she said in a bitter tone.

'Ah, you just got in, didn't you, Larak,' Brian began, trying to rescue himself. It was rather like those times when the Rowan had been in a right snit and no one knew why.

'Yes, I did,' and Larak fell quickly in with Brian's obvious ploy.

'Haven't even seen my mother yet. Found Damia and she suggested I might be hungry. Larak's ingenuous grin flashed at Brian. 'Have I got an a.s.signment in that pack?' Brian ruffled the flimsies. 'Yes, you do, actually,' and he extracted the right one. 'You're here for six months, working with Afra-' 'So he had to get rid of me first?' Damia asked in a sullen tone.

'Afra has nothing to do with a.s.signments,' Brian said, puzzled by her att.i.tude. Why, when she was a baby, she'd followed Afra around like one of his c.o.o.nies.

Ackerman shook his head. 'He doesn't know they've come in, much less who's been a.s.signed where. I don't think he'll like it much, though.' Ackerman looked at his watch and rose. 'I'd better log these in officially, kids. I'll see you two later?' 'Certainly!' Larak called back.

Afra had heard the news that evening and was not pleased.

When he met Gollee Gren at Luce's restaurant, he started right in.

'What's the idea behind sending Damia to Altair?' 'She needs the experience,' Gollee said simply, flagging down a waiter. 'Please tell Luce that Afra's here.' The waiter looked dubious. 'Afra?' He looked at the Capellan who nodded politely 'Afra of Callisto Tower,' Gren amended. 'Luce'll know what to do.

'Chef Luciano is a busy man-' 'Who'll be very upset if I have to tell him myself.' Gollee whipped his napkin from his lap and made to rise.

'I will tell him.' The waiter rushed off.

'New man.' Gren frowned. 'He'll learn.' Afra shook his head. 'I haven't been here that often recently' 'Tell me about it!' Gollee snorted.

'Tell me about Altair.' 'She's got to have a lot more experience before she's ready to run her own Tower,' Gren said, then paused as Afra realized what he meant.

'A new Tower? Where?' With more and more systems joining the Nine Star League - which had far more than Nine Stars in it now - there was incredible pressure on F T & T to expand their facilities.

'Aurigae,' and Gollee made a face. 'They've got ores every system will buy. They already have credit by the pod load. They want a T-i yesterday. But Jeff won't overload her until he's sure she's ready for that kind of responsibility.' 'She's got the capability.' 'She doesn't have the self-control,' Gren said and his eyes were hooded with disapproval. Afra arched an eyebrow and he shrugged, then admitted with a sigh, 'It's also because of the incident-' 'Jeff hasn't heard, has he?' 'Not from my lips,' Gren a.s.sured him. 'And no, I don't think he has. Amr's getting therapy and the prognosis is good, but he won't ever make stationmaster. He also has no idea who she really is. So when Jeff was wondering where to send her, I admit I suggested that she fill the Altairian spot, with an eye toward Aurigae. It's preferable to her being at Blundell.' 'Hmm, yes, she was dating the boy for six months.

They did a lot of dancing. Someone's sure to remember her face if she starts going out and about on Earth again.' 'I also think working with Torshan and Saggoner will be good for her. Jeff's objective, but the Rowan' 5 not.' Afra pursed his lips, nodded. 'Yes, that's a factor, too.

Damia's always been Rowan's sore spot. It's been pretty intense at times in the Tower during Damia's apprentices.h.i.+p. I don't know how much of that is their personalities clas.h.i.+ng. Even so, she'll learn more control.' 'Oh, indeed she will. She's scheduled to go to Capella after Altair,' and Gollee's smile was malicious. 'She'll learn control.' 'Don't be so hard on the child, Gollee. She's only sixteen and in an act of pa.s.sion it's hard enough for anyone to control themselves.

'We manage!' Gren protested.

Afra agreed with a nod, adding, 'But we're not sixteen.' Then he deliberately changed the subject. 'How's Tanya?

And the kids?' 'The kids are great!' Gollee returned promptly.

'And Tanya?' Gren smiled, having lined Afra up for that. 'She's even better.' 'Your daughter, she's what - twelve?' Gren groaned.

'Thirteen and boy trouble already.' He sighed, reflectively. 'In fact, I had a long talk with her after 'Good idea,' Afra agreed quickly.

'I can't figure out why the Rowan neglected-' Gren began in protest.

'I don't think she did. I think Damia simply didn't hear, Afra cut in. 'Cera had no problem.' 'Cera's overcontrolled,' Gren remarked.