Kelson - The Bishop's Heir Part 33

"I wish you well of it, then," Kelson said in the stunned silence. "But curst or not, I was prepared to love and honor your Sidana - and I think she meant to try, at least, to love and honor me."

Llewell spat. "She never loved you!"

Kelson only shook his head sadly as Morgan, with cool efficiency, s.n.a.t.c.hed the b.l.o.o.d.y stole that had bound the couple's hands and bade one of the knights to gag Llewell with it.

"You may be right, Llewell," the king whispered. "You may, indeed, be right. But she was my queen, if only for a little while, and she shall be honored as a queen, at least in her final sleep."

He glanced at Morgan, blinking back the tears, then lowered his eyes.

"Take that - person out of here, Alaric. I don't want to see him again until after my queen has been laid to rest. I'll sit in judgment then. There can be no doubt of the outcome, but even Llewell shall receive the full benefit of the law."

"It shall be done, my prince," Morgan murmured, signalling the knights to carry out the order.

"And now, if you don't mind," the king continued in a failing voice, "I'd like to be alone with her for a few nynutes. Uncle, take the rest of the family out as well, please."

Soon only Morgan, Duncan, and Dhugal remained in the blood-spattered choir with the grieving king, Nigel and his family lingering in sight but out of earshot near a side door, reluctant to leave completely. Meraude and Richenda wept quietly in one another's arms, and even the three royal cousins looked subdued: Conall genuinely regretful and the two younger boys wide-eyed and still a little frightened at the violence they had witnessed. Sighing, Morgan crouched down beside the silent king, where Duncan also knelt. Dhugal stood white-faced and mute behind his father, helpless to offer comfort.

"Is there anything else you'd like me to do, my prince?" Morgan asked, resting a brief, sympathetic touch on the rigid shoulders.

Kelson only bowed his head and closed his eyes, mind tightly shuttered against intrusion.

"Go to your wife, Alaric," he whispered. "Please. She needs you now, and I - need to be alone."

"Very well. Duncan, Dhugal, are you coming?"

"In a moment," Duncan answered. "We'll meet you in the sacristy."

Sighing, Morgan rose and joined the others waiting for him, embracing Richenda for a few seconds, then simply letting his wife hold him before shepherding Nigel and his family out a side door. Kelson opened his eyes as Dhugal eased down silently beside Duncan, but he did not look up.

"Kelson, we have a lot to learn about a lot of things," Duncan said softly.

"We tried, Alaric and I, but there simply wasn't time. If we were better trained - but who knows how to train healers, these days?"

"No one could have saved her," Kelson whispered. "She wasn't meant to live. It was all too easy. The perfect solution: for the king to marry the fair princess and unite the two lands, bringing peace...."

Dhugal swallowed audibly, tears springing to his own eyes. "It's my fault,"

he said. "I should have been watching Llewell more closely. If I'd - "

"It wasn't your fault," Kelson dully. "No one could have known Llewell would kill his own sister, rather than see her wed his mortal enemy. But when we'd gotten through the vows, I thought he'd accepted it."

"Kelson is right, son," Duncan said softly. "You couldn't have known. I doubt even Llewell knew, before the actual instant. One of us would have caught some hint."

Kelson shrugged and gave a heavy sigh. "It doesn't matter now, anyway.

We did our best, with the best of intentions - and it wasn't enough. The Fates obviously have something else in store for us."

"Perhaps," Duncan said.

A taut silence fell between them, Dhugal unconsciously easing closer to his father for comfort, but Kelson was oblivious to them. After a moment, Duncan slowly rose, gathering his blood-caked surplice in his arms and motioning for Dhugal to join him.

"We'll leave you alone for a few minutes, then. Sire," he said softly. "I'll be back when I've changed. Dhugal, will you help me?"

"In a moment," Dhugal whispered, not moving.

"Very well."

Without further words, Duncan retreated slowly up the altar steps and through the sacristy door, leaving only Dhugal still kneeling beside the king.

"Kelson, I'm so sorry," Dhugal managed to whisper.

"I know. So am I."

"Did - did you really fall in love with her?" Dhugal asked.

"Fall in love?" Kelson shrugged dejectedly. "How should I know? I never had the time to find out. I think I'd convinced myself that I could love her, and I was prepared to do everything within my power to make her a good husband.

Perhaps a king hasn't the right to expect more than that."

"A man has the right," Dhugal said indignantly. "Is a king any different?"

"Yes, d.a.m.n you! A king is different. He - " Kelson lowered his eyes, fighting back tears. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I am a man as well as a king, and I grieve for both my brides today. This girl, who I might have come to love as wife as well as queen - and the thwarted union of our two lands, which might have brought peace a little sooner. I - "

His voice broke, threatening to sob, and he set aside his crown and buried his face in one bloodied hand.

"Please leave me, Dhugal," he managed to choke out.

He even managed to keep control until Dhugal had gotten up and left, shaking his head hopelessly as he let his eyes pa.s.s once more over the still, pitiful form before him.

O G.o.d, they mean well, but how could they possibly understand? he thought numbly. It's over before it even had a chance to begin.

Vision starting to blur, he reached out one trembling forefinger to lightly touch a lock of her hair that was not slick with her blood. He lifted it to his lips as the tears welled in his eyes, fighting back the sobs which threatened to reduce him to a weeping ruin.

Sidana... he whispered only in his mind. Sidana, my silken princess. I would have tried to make you happy. You might have been...

Tenderly he slid his arms under her shoulders and lifted her to rest against his chest, heedless of the blood, cradling her head against his shoulder and rocking her, whispering her name as the tears made him blind and the sobs shook both their bodies.

"Sidana..."

And thus, set apart by his blood and his crown, as he would always be.

Kelson of Gwynedd crouched in the ruin of shattered dreams and wept bitter tears, holding the dead hope of peace in his trembling arms.

Here ends Book I of The Histories of Kelson the King. Book II, The King's Justice, will continue the struggle of Kelson against the conspiracy of Archbishop Loris and Caitrin of Meara, bring the return of Jehana, Kelson's Deryni mother, and develop new themes and problems for the young King and his counsellors.