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"He'll be missed," I say.
"Do you know your name, hon?"
"Trudy. Trudy Lake."
"Good. Now that you're awake, I'll go fetch the doctor."
"Wait. What about Sheriff Boyd?"
"He didn't make it."
"He's dead?"
"That's what I'm told."
She starts to leave.
"Wait," I say. "Am I okay?"
"You're fine dear."
"Did they take out my spleen?"
"Your spleen? No, hon. Why do you ask?"
"I dreamt they removed my spleen, and my husband, who's really my brother, mounted it above the bed, next to his spleen."
"Okay, hon, you're hallucinating. You won't even remember this conversation in a few minutes."
"The h.e.l.l I won't!"
"I'll be right back."
"Wait!"
"Yes?"
"Has anyone contacted Dr. Box? From New York City?"
"Box? What sort of name is that? Just relax, Trudy. You're still groggy from the medication."
While waitin' for the doctor I try to remember what happened. It's just flashes right now, but I remember bein' real dizzy and scared. I was havin' trouble breathin'. Then I realized I still had my blouse tied around my head, and remembered the powder. I kept the s.h.i.+rt there in case the powder was still circulatin' after the wreck. I kept real still in case the sheriff was alive, and a.s.sumed someone would come along directly to offer help. But either time stood still, or everyone who pa.s.sed by had somethin' else to do. After what seemed like a long time, I decided to try pus.h.i.+n' the trunk open. But when I reached up, all I felt was air.
The crash had popped the trunk open.
I staggered out, fell to the ground, and pa.s.sed out for what might've been the second time. When I came to, I realized the car was on an embankment. That's why no one stopped to help. They couldn't see us. I made my way up the hill, then untied my blouse and put it on and tried to walk down the road. I don't remember anyone givin' me a ride to the hospital, but someone must have, 'cause here I am. I make a mental note to find the good person or people who helped me, so I can give them a proper thank you.
The doctor comes in and says, "I'm honored! You left at one o'clock this afternoon and missed us so much you went out and got a concussion less than twelve hours later. I believe that's a record. How do you feel, Trudy?"
"I can't feel my arms and legs. Is that the medication?"
"Excuse me? You've lost all sensation?"
"I can't feel my arms and legs!" I shout.
His face takes on a panicked look.
I wait a moment, then say, "I'm just havin' fun with you, doctor. I'm fine."
"Not funny, Miss Lake. Not funny at all."
The doctor's wrong. It was funny. I know because when I called Gideon and told him what I said, he laughed hysterically for a whole minute!
Then he said he'll be here in the mornin', and won't leave my side till we're safe in New York City. Then his voice takes on a smug tone as he says, "I was right about you being in danger, and I was right about the powder. Is there anything you'd like to say to me? Anything at all?"
"Yes."
"Go on."
I say, "I can't believe you f.u.c.ked my sister!"
Then I hang up before he gets a chance to say anythin' else.
THE END.
If you enjoyed "BOX," you'll love
John Locke's Gideon Box novel t.i.tled, "Bad Doctor!"
***** WOW! Bad Doctor is a wild, jaw-dropping story that is so funny you'll laugh out loud. An amazing list of characters make every other book you read pale in comparison. I wanted it to go on for another 1,000 pages! A wonderful wild ride!
~ Ron Chicaferro (Scottsdale, AZ) ***** John Locke is a writing machine, cranking out multiple hit novels per year, and always entertaining me in the process. Bad Doctor introduces Dr. Gideon Box to the "Locke-verse," another colorful character with some amazing personality defects that make the reader love to hate him. I was able to breeze through this fast-paced novel in only a day, which is par for the course with Mr. Locke's novels.
~ Joe Barlow (Scranton, PA) ***** As of June 2012 I have read everything John Locke has published for Kindle. Every one of his novels is an easy read and will keep you entertained. "Bad Doctor" is a bit of a departure from Locke's series fiction, feature an antihero that you will either love or hate. I hope to read more books with this character.
~ James Bower (St. Louis, MO) ***** Other 5 star reviews say it all. I'll just add: pure blast of entertainment, 10 on a scale of 1to 10, and I never pause even a moment of buying any new Locke booka ~ David S. Drobner (Pembroke Pines, Florida) ***** This is probably one of the most bizarre tales Mr. Locke has written, but then again maybe not. There are, as usual, some very colorful characters. And every time I think about the co-joined twin a.s.sa.s.sins, I just can't help but smile. It would just not be right if Rose didn't show up, and sure enough she does. Can't wait to read the good Doctor's next adventure.
~ F. P. Right (NW PA) ***** Just a great written story. I wish we could see more books on this main charactera..
~Thomas L. Wolford (Kent, WA) ***** I have read everything of John Locke's that I can get my hands on and loved each one. I also have a great love for Donovan Creed, so much so, that I can definitely see the closeness of character between Dr. Gideon Box and Donovan. To me, it was a hilarious read. Most entertaining.
~ Linda L. Roy (Louisiana) ***** There is just nothing like a John Locke book! This is a brand new character, with a few old friends thrown in to thrill the faithful fans, but it has that Locke spin that no one else can give a book. As with everything John writes, it is a quick, fun, easy, entertaining read that makes you gasp one minute and laugh out loud the next. You start out hating this bad doctor but find out he has some redeeming qualities and really want him to come out on top in the end. I read this book in one day, could not put it down and have now added Dr. Gideon Box to my list of favorite characters that I want more of.
~ Mary E (Minneapolis, MN) ***** WOW!!! Another great new character from John Locke. I read all of his books and loved them all and this book did not disappoint me.
~ K. Miles (Chandler, AZ) ***** A fun quick read, that will have you turning pages, as this evil doctor gets himself into all kinds of trouble. Completely twisted, humorous, campy fun! Can't wait for the next Dr. Gideon Box book. Thank you John Locke!
~ K. Parsley (Illinois, USA) ***** I have read every book that John Locke has written. Why? Because they are smart, creative and hilarious!
Bad Doctor is no exception. The only author I know to compare John Locke with is Nelson DeMille. The sarcastic humor and genius of John Carey is captured in each of Locke's novels. Gideon Box is no exception and you will embarra.s.s yourself by laughing out loud, rolling on the floor in public.
Highly recommend and can't wait for John's next book!!!
~ Frank (Johns Creek, Georgia)
Preview a
BAD DOCTOR.
John Locke PREVIEW OF.
"BAD DOCTOR"
Introduction.
I.
I'M DR. GIDEON Box.
If you're coming after me, don't do it in a hospital.
That's my domain.
And don't p.i.s.s me off in the real world and expect a smooth hospital stay in the future, because I have a long memory, and no one is exempt. If you're not a patient but your loved ones are, I'll hara.s.s them.
Before you bully me in a bar, embarra.s.s me on a date, or refuse to replace the s.h.i.+tty car you sold me, think about this: you'll never be more vulnerable in your life than when you're spending the night in a hospital. You're out of your element, drugged, and totally dependent on our schedules and personnel. When you're here, you're not family. You're prey!
Your wife just had a procedure and needs her sleep?
Good luck with that.
I'll swing by the nurse's station, make a notation on her chart. Every two hours someone will be in her room, waking her up, changing her IV, moving her around. If you're not guarding her closely I might slip in her room, flip her on her side, lift up her gown, check out her a.s.s. Or maybe I'll feel her up while pretending to listen to her heart with my stethoscope.
Don't get me wrong. I have no interest in your wife's nude body. I'd only view or touch her because I can, and because it's another way to beat you.
You get what I'm saying?
Don't f.u.c.k with me.
II.
I DIDN'T KILL Joe's mom last week.
I could have killed her, but one glance at her chart told me the hospital didn't need my help. Her catheter should have been removed a day earlier. Since it wasn't, I figured the nurses forgot it.
I was right.
Like ventilators, catheters are breeding grounds for infection. Sixty-five thousand patients a year die from infections caused by these two pieces of equipment.
I never knew Joe's mom, but thirty years ago Joe and I were on the sixth grade track team. A half-dozen of us were in the showers after practice the day Joe smacked my a.s.s with a wet towel. I ignored it, but he kept smacking me. The others taunted me to do something about it. When I confronted Joe, he beat the s.h.i.+t out of me.
Picture me in a fetal position on the floor, clutching my stomach in agony. Now picture Joe and his friends p.i.s.sing on me as a group, drenching me from head to toe.
Laughing.
Like I said, I didn't know Joe's mom, and didn't kill her.
But I let her die last week from an infection I could've prevented.
III.
I'M NOT AN angel of mercy. I don't kill random patients.
I've got a list.
If you're on my list, it means you've done something I refuse to forgive. It's probably something minor to you, something you forgot long ago. But like the Stones said in the second best song they ever recorded, time is on my side.
Like everyone else in the world, you and your loved ones will eventually get sick or have an accident. And when you do, you better not come to my hospital, because I can kill you, maim you, infect you, humiliate you, frighten you, aggravate you, and generally f.u.c.k up your life in a thousand different ways.
Want an example?
I bet you didn't know that every year three hundred hospital patients burst into flames during routine operations.