Sun And Candlelight Part 18

You'll get used to it, of course.

' He leaned back in his chair, staring at her.

"Yesterday when I was on the ward you looked wretched.

Why?

' She shook her head.

"Nothing--it wasn't anything.

' "Young Penrose been annoying you?

' She looked at him, trying to think of what to say, and after a moment he smiled a little.

"It was young Penrose, of course.

I'm sorry," and then: "Does he want to make it up?

' She shook her head again.

"No.

' She wanted to tell Sarre about it, but the words wouldn't come.

Presently she said defiantly: "And if he did, I wouldn't.

' He didn't smile, but she saw that he didn't quite believe her.

"T wouldn't," she repeated vehemently.

He nodded.

"It's a pity that we weren't able to talk about it.

Promise me, Alethea, that you will tell me if things worry you.

Perhaps I can't help, but I can listen, and telling is half the answer,

you know.

' "You're a dear," she said warmly, 'and I was silly about it.

I'm sorry.

' "Not silly.

Loving someone can be the very devil.

You're managing very well.

There's only one more week to go, isn't there?

I shall be back on Sat.u.r.day of next week and we'll go over to Holland

on Sunday.

No, better still, we'll go over on Sat.u.r.day from Harwich I want to take the car, we'll have to fly another time.

Could you be ready?

' Alethea said that yes, she could, quite easily.

She would be off duty for the last time at six o'clock and they

wouldn't need to leave until eight o'clock.

"If this weather holds it will be pleasant driving up to Groningen in

the early morning, you'll be able to see something of the country as we go. ' She exerted herself to ask questions after that and by the time they had strolled back to the hospital she felt much happier.

She told Sarre so and he chuckled.

"Well, don't imagine it was my company, much more likely to be that wine we drank.

' She laughed with him and lifted her pretty face for his kiss.

It was neither quick nor light this time.

"T hope you will miss me," said Sarre.

"I'm going to miss you.

' She told herself as she got ready for bed that he had kissed her like that because she had been upset about Nick.

He really was very clever, for he must have known that she had needed something like that to restore her self-respect and make her feel that even if Nick didn't want her, there were others who did.

Their marriage might work very well, she mused; in any case it stood just as much chance as some of the marriages among her friends, which hadn't worked well at all, despite their declarations that they would love each other for ever and ever.

Alethea turned restlessly in her bed.

She supposed that some couples, but not very many, really did love each other for the rest of their lives.

An enviable state, but not for her.

All the same, if Sarre and she could remain as they were, good friends and liking each other's company, then the future wasn't going to be too bad; there would be no deep feelings to hurt, no jealousy, probably no quarrelling.

She thought that Sarre would be a difficult man with whom to quarrel and as she was even-tempered there should be no reason for them to fall out.

She fell asleep, lapped in a feeling of security.

With Sarre gone, the week turned out to be surprisingly long; she had got used to seeing his vast form amble on to the ward and even if there had been no opportunity to talk, it had been pleasant to see him there.

But as it turned out, the week, long though it seemed, wasn't long enough.

The last two days of it she spent every spare moment packing up her possessions, some to be left to be fetched when she got back from Holland, some to be taken with her.

She had managed to do some shopping, splas.h.i.+ng out rather on a wedding outfit of champagne wild silk and a straw hat to go with it, a small brimmed affair with silk flowers around the crown.

She would probably never wear it again, but it had looked so right.

She had bought a cotton jersey two-piece to wear in Holland too; she already had an almost new lightweight coat which would go very well with it.

Sarre hadn't said just how long she would be there and the weather was getting warmer every day, so she packed slacks and tops to suit all weathers, a couple of thin dresses, a skirt or two and some pretty blouses and her velvet blazer.

She possessed only two evening dresses, and she packed them both, wis.h.i.+ng as she did so that she need never again wear the one she had bought specially for Nick.

She was ready and waiting on the Sat.u.r.day evening when the Porter's Lodge telephoned the Home to say that she was wanted in the front hall.

She had wished her friends goodbye, thanked them for the early morning tea service which they had given her, bade goodbye to Sir Walter and her ward staff and somehow avoided meeting Nick.

She went out of the Nurses' Home and into the hospital, praying fervently that she wouldn't meet him now.

She almost did; she saw him coming towards her down the opposite pa.s.sage to hers, both of which led to the main hall entrance.

They would meet there unless she either hurried her pace or slowed down to a crawl and there was nowhere to go, she was bound to meet him.

They reached the hall at the same time and she brushed past him to where she could see Sarre waiting.

He had seen her too; he was beside her in a few quick strides, his hands on her shoulders, smiling down at her, while she was aware that Nick had crossed to the porter's lodge and was watching them.

"You grow prettier each time I see you," declared Sarre, and kissed her.

A quick light kiss but still a kiss.

She smiled at him, knowing that Nick was still watching.

"It's been a long week," she told him.

"I'm quite ready if you want to go now.

' He said lightly: "Why not?

I've seen everyone I needed to see.

The ferry goes at ten-thirty, we'll stop and have dinner on the way.

If we hurried we could go and see your grandmother if you particularly wanted to.

' She shook her head.

"T telephoned her today, she doesn't expect us, and if we went now she

and Mrs Bustle would want to give us a meal and there wouldn't be time for that.

I told her I'd telephone when we get back.

' "My dear girl, you can telephone her the moment we arrive home.

We can talk over dinner--we have quite a few things to discuss.

' She could see out of the corner other eye that Nick was walking

away.

When he had disappeared she said: "T'll get my bag, it's in the Home still.

' "And I'll walk with you.