Uniform Fetish: Men Of Station 23 Part 7

"I wonder how many more times we can f.u.c.k before my a.s.signment is over." Tammy wasn't the type of woman to curse. It didn't sound right coming from her sweet mouth. There was something bitter in her tone, but he knew d.a.m.n well she enjoyed every minute of the s.e.x.

Darius rolled to his side, looking at him briefly before focusing on Tammy. "What's wrong with you?" He stroked her hair. Rather than grow angrier, she took a cleansing breath and scrubbed her hand over her face. "You mad at one of us?"

She shook her head. "It's not either of you. It's just me." Conall didn't like that she sounded defeated. His urge to make everything better for her surprised him. His career required him to care for others, but this was different. "I'm not twenty years old anymore. I'm a woman, and have to live with my decisions."

"You regret what we've been doing?" asked Conall.

Tammy turned and made eye contact, even reaching out to cup his cheek. "No. I regret that it has to end."

She didn't want to become an emotional basket case in front of Conall and Darius, but a lot had transpired since she came to Station 23. It may have been a short time frame, but she'd done things she never dreamed of doing with her four men, even starting to open up to them. She'd finally begun to face her past, bit by bit, by being around the constant reminders of the fire which stole her parents. And she felt safe. For the first time since breaking it off with her ex, she felt protected, cared for.

But it was all an illusion. What man would say no to a woman willingly opening her legs? She was just the station tramp and would soon return to her old life at the Heartland Tribute and be forgotten.

"I won't say I don't like making love to you, Tamara, because it would be a lie. But that's not all I care about." Darius's dark hair fell partially in his eyes. G.o.d, it was so unfair to want something so badly and know she couldn't have it.

"Please don't bother. Don't tell me you care about me. I've been with you less than a week. A blink of an eye in the grand scheme of things."

"It's enough to know I haven't been happier in years. A man needs a woman, and it's not natural living without one. Especially at my age."

"Aren't you the one making your daddy proud? I'm pretty sure committing to a woman would go against some type of firefighter code, no?" She knew she was being snarky but couldn't help herself. It was her own little pity trip. The unwelcome walk down memory lane when climbing the rope wall combined with the impossibility of a future with her four gorgeous firefighters had soured her mood.

Conall sat up, bracing one arm on the gra.s.s beside him. His forearm was thick with muscle, his tattoos peeking out from the sleeve of his s.h.i.+rt. "I know lots of station guys who are married or in serious relations.h.i.+ps. It can work."

There was no way he was offering. She knew his type. He talked about his many years working up north and his brief stint in the Maritimes. He was a wild card, a drifter who would likely feel stifled with the same woman every day of his life. Darius she wasn't so sure. Although she could imagine him settling down, she knew he'd never give up his career for a woman. It was a part of who he was, and she'd never ask him to let it go. Then there were Jake and Aaron, two men she only envisioned as bachelors.

"You don't have to console me," she said. "I'm fine."

Tammy sat up, cupping her b.r.e.a.s.t.s to regain a bit of dignity. She wished she had of just kept her big mouth shut and enjoyed her remaining week with the men.

Darius smiled, bringing out her hackles. This was her life she was discussing, not a game. "Do you really think I'll let you walk out of my life when your time slot is over?" He laughed this time, a possessive sound which slithered through her body. "I've had the itch to find a woman of my own for years but fought it until now. The truth is I'm not getting any younger and it's more important to me than anything to have what my parents had before it's too late. I want to know love, share life with a woman who makes my heart beat a little faster. A woman like you, Tamara."

What could she say to that? She wanted to believe him, but she had been let down so much in the past. Even her ex, Brian, had seemed like a great guy in the beginning. He turned out to be her worst nightmare. Tammy was terrified of giving over her heart only to be sorely disappointed again, left worse off than when she was single. "I can't do this," she said.

"Too bad." Conall tilted her chin up. "Are you telling us this was only s.e.x to you? You can go back to your life behind a desk and never think of us again?"

"Of course I'll think of you!" she snapped. "I've been thinking about the four of you since long before I got my a.s.signment. It's forgetting that will be a challenge."

Conall lowered his brow as if her argument didn't make sense. "Then don't forget."

If only it were that simple. She stood up and walked over to the partial fence to retrieve her skirt suit. As she danced into her clothes with as much self-respect as possible, both men joined her. She laughed and shook her head. "What's your plan? Am I just going to move into the fire station and be your mascot like some freaking dalmatian?"

"You'd be our woman." Conall tried to kiss her lips, but she pulled away. She had no right to be angry for something she allowed to happen, but a war waged inside her, making her volatile.

She tugged on her jacket, concealing her b.r.e.a.s.t.s by doing up two b.u.t.tons. "This is ridiculous. I have a good job, peace, maybe a promotion coming up. And for once in my life I have some sense of security."

"So who's the one not wanting to commit?" Darius's eyes darkened, something she recognized from herself. A self-preservation technique to avoid getting hurt-just turn off the emotion.

"I just don't want to get hurt," she whispered. Tammy felt drained. It would be so easy to collapse into Darius's strong arms and let him fend off the world. But she had to take care of herself. She'd gotten this far on her own since running from Brian and had to keep strong, keep going forward.

They both surrounded her like two mountain ranges. The sun was choked out as they each held her, their hands roaming over her hair, back, and arms. "Who hurt you?" asked Darius. "Tell us."

She had a feeling these were the type of men a person didn't mess with. There was a hint of threat when he spoke which strangely aroused her. "An ex. A very crazy ex."

"But he's out of the picture now. You can't live in the past, Tamara."

What if the past continued to haunt her? She could have sworn she'd seen Brian's face in the crowd near one of those garage fires. But she wasn't certain. "It's a long story, and it ends with a restraining order and moving apartments and jobs several times in just two years."

"Why didn't you tell us this before?" asked Darius.

"It's not exactly something you blurt out to everyone you meet."

He cupped her face. "I'd like to think we're more than strangers." She leaned into his touch even though she wanted to remain distant. The more she fell for these men the harder it would be to get over them. "Not every man is created equal. I promise I'd never make you regret giving me your heart."

Darius's sweet words only cemented the fact he deserved better. She had so much emotional baggage dating all the way back to her childhood. What she needed was some serious therapy-like a whole team of specialists devoted to her-not a new relations.h.i.+p.

"We'll talk about this when we get back to the station," said Conall. "Don't push her. She's obviously upset."

They returned to the truck, trudging over the crisp, dry gra.s.s. Part of her wanted to blurt out for them to love her, protect her...forgive her. The other part refused to weaken but followed the course she'd set for herself to stay safe and advance her career. Tammy Palmer had no time for love. It was dangerous, painful, a gamble designed for younger woman too foolish to resist.

She looked out the window as they drove back along the country road on the outskirts of the city. The wide open fields were a relief to her eyes. She was only used to buildings obstructing her view. But they soon turned down the road which would bring them back into the city. She didn't want to talk. It was so much easier hiding from her problems and skirting around reality and fantasy by giving into her wanton desires. But it wasn't just s.e.x, was it? Tammy was quickly losing herself to each of her four men. Each held a unique key to her heart, yet she continued to lock them out. Perhaps she felt hesitant to commit in a tangible way because not all four men wanted her equally. How could she start a relations.h.i.+p with one or two when she desired all four? It would be awkward and unfair to everyone. Or maybe she was terrified to reveal her childhood trauma, certain they would never understand since they were firefighters. Or was it love itself? She'd given up hope in the notion of happily ever after when things went sour with Brian-but maybe she was too hasty.

If Steph were there she'd tell Tammy to buck up and follow her heart's desire. To stop moping and living in the shadow of her former self. She missed her best friend. It was times like these when she really needed another woman's advice and listening ear. But she only had herself now, and her decisions and actions would affect the rest of her life.

Chapter Twelve.

"Did she tell you his name?" asked Jake.

"Brian Oxford. She says she got a restraining order, but it didn't help." Darius sat on the edge of his bed, fresh from the shower.

Jake didn't like the idea of Tammy holding back because some a.s.shole from her past had emotionally scarred her. Like Brad and Liam from the department always said, men who dared to abuse a woman should be locked up and given a taste of their own medicine. It seemed even criminals didn't favor those who preyed on women and children. Jake couldn't agree more.

"That's the name," said Aaron. "The guys from the department said the crank caller was a Brian Oxford from an area code two cities east of here. He's got a record and spent a few years in and out of the psych ward."

"They do anything about it?" asked Jake.

Aaron leaned over his knees. "They can't. Unless he said something threatening, the most we can do is get his number blocked."

"The hang-ups only started after Tammy moved in. He knows she's here. Does he expect her to pick up the phone?" Conall paced the small room. Tammy was downstairs taking pictures of the fire trucks. There was no way they could tell her about this discovery. She was already terrified as it was. They'd have to deal with the little p.r.i.c.k on their own.

The emergency siren began to wail. "f.u.c.k," he muttered. That alarm seemed to know exactly when not to go off. A personal nemesis.

"What else started since Tammy showed up?" asked Darius, a knowing look in his eyes.

He thought about it for a minute, and then everything fell together in his mind. "The garage fires. You think Oxford has something to do with them?"

"I'll bet you any money he's luring her to these locations because he knows she'll be with us. What if this time's different, and he manages to hurt her? I say we leave her here. He won't expect that." Conall was dressing as he spoke. Time was always of the essence when responding to an emergency. Jake knew too well how a few minutes could mean life or death. He bolted from the room, knowing full well he had to protect his woman.

After suiting up in the garage, he found Tammy with her hands over her ears in the hallway leading to the kitchen. It took a while before a person could get used to the sharp trill of the alarm. Darius was already down the pole, starting up one of the trucks. Conall and Aaron were suiting up.

Jake trapped Tammy against the wall between his arms. "Wait here for us. Don't answer the phone. We'll be back as soon as we can."

"Why can't I come along? What about the article?"

"Next time. Trust me, and just stay here tonight." He leaned down and brushed his cheek to hers, taking in her scent.

He started to walk backwards down the hall, capturing her face to memory.

"Be careful," she said.

"Never leave anyone behind." He winked and then ran the rest of the way to the truck.

They arrived on the scene of another garage fire, so similar to the others during the past week. Within an hour they had the fire out. These pointless calls were starting to p.i.s.s him off. Jake didn't sign on for this bulls.h.i.+t. The police needed to do their job so they could focus on true emergencies where people's lives were at stake.

Today a couple news crews showed up on the scene, which was always unwelcome. Once they caught whiff of a potential city arsonist, they'd have a field day blowing it out of proportion. Reporters would bombard the station and not give them a minute's peace. In the back of Jake's mind, he wondered if Brian Oxford was indeed the man setting these blazes. Or were his crank calls to Tammy just a coincidence?

An unmarked police car showed up to help handle the crowds. Two police cars and the fire chief were already on the scene. As the group of spectators grew, Jake couldn't help but glance around, wondering if one of the faces was Tammy's stalker. She'd already been through too much in her life. First losing her parents to a fire, and now having to deal with a man who didn't take no for an answer.

Brad joined them at the truck as they prepared to take off. "Chief says it's the same MO. Looks like we have a problem on our hands." He plucked off his police hat and ran his forearm across his brow.

Conall finished coiling the fire hoses back in place. He rested one foot up on the running board of the truck as he appraised the scene. "The journalist staying on with us has been getting crank calls from an ex. They started the same time as they fires. We left her at the station just in case he was luring her out to the scenes."

"We'll follow up on it, but have you ever thought that he could have been luring you guys away?"

Tammy called her friend Steph, feeling the urge to talk with her friend. It was the first time she'd been alone since coming to the station. She enjoyed riding in the truck with her men, but for some reason Jake wanted her to stay behind today. Maybe she was in the way during the calls. There was only one more day on their extended s.h.i.+ft. Then she'd be staying at their house by the beach for the weekend. They were excited about introducing her to a slice of their private life. The thought of being alone with all four firefighters, with no disruptions, sent a whirl of mixed emotions through her. What would happen when the weekend was over?

There was no answer at Steph's place. She set the phone back in the cradle and wandered around the station. It was so quiet when all alone. Tammy ran her fingertips along the s.h.i.+ny red surface of one of the parked trucks. Everything in the station was immaculately kept.

She began to wonder why she pushed Jake, Darius, and Conall away when they appeared genuinely interested. It's what she'd always dreamed of-belonging, security, real love. If she kept hiding from possibilities, she'd be alone forever. But could a serious relations.h.i.+p with multiple men work? They were all best friends, living and working together like a single ent.i.ty. If ever a menage relations.h.i.+p was warranted, it was with these four men. But Aaron had told her flat out he didn't want a commitment with her. If she agreed to give things a chance with the other three, would that affect their friends.h.i.+p with Aaron? Tammy didn't want to put a kink in an already unique camaraderie.

Where was Steph when she needed her? Her friend may have been younger and wilder, but when Tammy really needed advice or a listening ear, Steph would pull through for her. Perhaps she just needed to hear someone say, "go for it," to give her the verbal permission her heart required.

Although she was used to living alone, she suddenly felt a bit nervous in the big, open garage. Night had claimed the world outside. The florescent lighting high above flickered, and the mult.i.tude of small gla.s.s windowpanes on the garage doors reflected obscure images. She decided she'd be more comfortable waiting in the smaller bedroom upstairs until the guys returned. As she walked to the stairs she heard sounds outside one of the bay doors. Her heart raced.

Since it was night out, any person outside the station would be able to see inside with perfect clarity, while she could see nothing but a black void beyond the gla.s.s. It put her at unease. Right now she wanted to be home in her safe haven or at least not to be alone in the unfamiliar station. It was the presence of Darius and his crew that made her feel protected, not the place. When the sound continued, she rushed to the stairs and dashed up.

Tammy had taken for granted the many months of peace she had since moving to her new apartment. What if Brian had found her again? He always seemed to find her eventually, but how long could one man persist? If he saw her with any one of the strapping firefighters, he'd be burning with jealousy, fuel for his insanity. She pushed her unpleasant thoughts away. Brian hadn't found her. It was just her irrational fears surfacing.

She lay down on Aaron's bed, his spicy cologne lingering on the sheets. They would probably be back in an hour or so if the call wasn't too serious. Surely she could keep herself sane that long. The sound of a door being forced open stole her breath. She sat up in a rush, her heart racing as she froze in place. Tammy listened for another sound, but when she heard the heavy sound of careful footfalls approaching, she swore she died a thousand deaths. Where should she go? What should she do? Her brain screamed for her to get up and hide, but she was paralyzed in place, too terrified to move a muscle.

The door to the bedroom creaked open, revealing the silhouette of a large-framed man. It couldn't be Brian. It was more likely one of her lovers, but where was the fire truck?

"Tammy Palmer?" The stranger stepped into the room, allowing her to see him clearly. It was a police officer in full uniform. He had a strong build with broad shoulders and a fit body. Her shoulders slunk in sudden relief.

"Yes?"

"Glad to see you're okay. Conall sent me back to check on you. They're just finis.h.i.+ng up their call but wanted me to come on ahead."

"I'm fine, thank you."

"I'll just do a quick perimeter check before I head out then. You have yourself a good night." He tilted his hat before leaving. She listened to the sound of his shoes until the door downstairs closed behind him. Tammy dropped down to her back and laughed quietly to herself. She'd been scared over nothing again. Everything was fine, nothing to worry about.

She decided to get up and stop hiding, maybe make herself a cup of coffee. Who in their right mind would break into a fire hall, anyway?

Tammy leaned against the kitchen counter while the coffee percolated. The familiar smell comforted her, as did the sounds of the machine. The telephone ringing startled her. She ignored the call, not sure if she had the right to answer it. What if it was an emergency? She wouldn't have a clue what to do or say. The ringing stopped, but then started up again less than a minute later, so she braved answering it. It could have been one of the men checking up on her.

"h.e.l.lo?"

"Tammy."

"Who is this?"

Silence. She thought she knew the voice but didn't dare make a.s.sumptions.

"h.e.l.lo?"

"Seeking refuge in a fire hall? Did you think you could hide from me forever?" He chuckled, the dark sound hollowing her insides. "But it looks like your boyfriends are occupied at the moment."

"I'll call the cops. They'll be here in two minutes."

"But what about dear Stephanie? Don't you care about her life?"

She had a sudden surge of confidence. "What about her?"

"I know everything about you-where you live, work, who your friends are, who you're f.u.c.king."

"What about Stephanie?" She hadn't been able to reach her friend on the phone. Fear began to fester inside her, much worse since it involved a friend.

"She's okay. For now. I thought we'd start with her, then move onto your lovers if your friends.h.i.+p with Stephanie wasn't as strong as I antic.i.p.ated."

"What do you want?"

"You."

She wanted to cry, to break down completely. She wanted to tell him to f.u.c.k off and go to h.e.l.l but had to think of her friend first. "Where's Stephanie?"

"She's keeping me company in this quaint little garage. They don't make 'em like they used to, do they? I a.s.sure you it's far from where your firefighters are. If you checked, you'd see the other station is busy, too."

"So it was you," she said, barely above a whisper. Was he crazy enough to kill for her? She couldn't take that risk.