Faerie Winter Part 4

Who better than a waterworker to have around a firestarter? Hope ruffled her sister's fur cap. "Not alone. The rest of us will take turns with you. Keep guard, in case anyone decides they want Ethan leaving ahead of schedule. You too, right, Liza?"

"Of course." I couldn't run as fast as a wolf, but I could keep watch.

"Good." A gust of wind tugged at the edge of the tarp. Hope absently held out a hand, stilling it. I slid the shed's metal door open and went inside. More glowing stones lit the small s.p.a.ce. Orange this time, they provided heat as well as light. Mom sat in a rusted folding chair, watching over Ethan.

He lay on an old army cot. More blisters had burst, and fluid seeped from his skin. There were no blankets around him now. I wondered how he even stood the touch of the soft sheet at his back. Only his face looked peaceful, eyes shut in sleep. His breathing was ragged, though, and the burned-meat smell lingered, along with a faint sickroom scent that made me suspect his wounds had become infected.

Mom looked up, then flinched, as if she feared my magic still.

"How is he?" I asked.

"Holding on." Mom forced herself to look at me. "I don't know how, but he is."

There was no other chair, just a water bucket wedged into one corner beside a wobbly table. I slid the door shut to keep in the heat. "If all goes well, Caleb will be here by morning. He only need hold on until then."

"Kate told me." Mom frowned. "I wish Matthew hadn't gone."

My back stiffened against the hard metal door, though some part of me wished the same thing. "He only does what needs doing."

"I know," Mom said. "That doesn't stop me from worrying."

"I worry about you, too, you know." It felt good to say so aloud.

Mom said nothing. How much had she not said through the years?

"Did you mean what you told me? About you and Caleb starting the War? Who were were you?" you?"

"The children of powerful people, Liza, nothing more." Mom's gaze grew distant, as if she were seeing all the way back to Before.

Ethan moaned and kicked the air. Mom made shus.h.i.+ng sounds. She reached out to stroke his forehead, but then her hands moved abruptly to her stomach.

"Mom?"

"I'm all right." She stood and pushed past me to open the door and run outside. I heard her throwing up behind the shed. I wondered what it was like to be able to lie.

Ethan kept thras.h.i.+ng at the air. His moans turned to sobs. I didn't hear when Mom returned to the house. I kept watch, making sure Ethan didn't fall from the bed, but otherwise not touching his damaged skin, until Hope and her sister came to take my place. By the time I returned to Kate's house, Mom was asleep on the couch.

"She'll be fine," Kate said, but Kate had kept secrets from me, too. Once Caleb was through healing Ethan, I'd ask him to look at Mom. He'd know whether she was really all right, and, unlike Mom, he wouldn't be able to lie about it.

In Kate's house, as in mine, the downstairs rooms were warmer than the upstairs ones, so in winter everyone slept by the fire. Kate slept in her oversized armchair, while I wrapped myself in blankets on the floor. I kept drifting off only to wake whenever I thought I heard Matthew's paws on the stairs. It was a long time before I slipped into deeper sleep.

When I did, I dreamed of flames roaring around me, of skin melting from my bones. Burning ash clogged my throat, choking my screams. "All human things must die," a stranger's voice said, and I knew I had no choice but to let the fire consume me.

I couldn't let it consume me. I ran, and blistering heat gave way to a cold gray winter forest. A dark shadow lifted its head, and it wore my mother's face. "Liza," the shadow whispered.

I ran harder. I knew if I looked at that shadow again, Mom would be gone, and only the shadow would remain.

"Liza!" Mom called me again and again. "Liza, wake up."

My eyes shot open. I bolted upright, blankets tangling around me. Mom sat beside me-she was real, not a shadow. "You're all right," I said.

Mom reached for me, her eyes seeking mine to make sure I was awake. We'd learned that if she touched me-if anyone touched me-before I fully woke from a nightmare, I'd lash out with my magic, not hearing those around me.

I threw myself into her arms, and she held me close. "I don't want to lose you." I choked on the words and began to cry.

"I know, Lizzy." Mom sounded near tears, too. "I know." She stroked my hair, as if I were still a child, and I let her.

The front door opened. Kate's footsteps crossed the room. Pale light crept in the cracks around the windows.

First light. I was suddenly as wide awake as if someone had poured snowmelt down my back. I pulled away from Mom.

"Where's Matthew?" I asked her.

He hadn't come back. I knew it even before Mom said so. Kate thought maybe he'd waited to return on foot with Caleb and Allie after all, but the shadows around her eyes told me she was worried, too. Matthew could no more lie than I could. He had to have meant it when he'd said he would run ahead of the healers.

While Mom tried to talk me into waiting longer, Kate helped me pack. Hope had left clothes for us. I rolled up the sleeves of a borrowed sweater and the legs of a pair of pants, and I packed another set of clothes in the backpack Kate gave me. I also packed dried meat, flint and steel for a fire, a couple of water skins, and oil and cloth for a torch. I stashed more meat in my coat pockets.

"At least take someone with you," Mom said. She'd not complained when Matthew went alone. Matthew hadn't given her the chance to.

There was no one for me to take. Hope shouldn't be traveling too far, on account of the baby; Seth had three younger siblings he was looking after; and Charlotte couldn't keep the pace I intended to set. I wouldn't risk any of the younger children, not when I didn't know what danger we might face.

Mom stirred the coals with a metal poker. "I can go with you."

"No!" The word came out with more force than I intended. I tied my pack firmly shut. "Not when you're ill."

The words hung between us as the coals burst into flame. Kate pressed a square of cornbread into my hands. I ate it, not wanting to take too much from her rations but knowing I'd need energy for the journey.

"I'm well enough to travel," Mom said.

The fire's heat burned against my face as I b.u.t.toned my coat, tied my scarf, and put on my hat and gloves. "It didn't work out very well the last time you decided to travel, did it?"

Mom drew a sharp breath. "Why not dig the knife a little deeper, Liza? You always were good with knives." Mom carefully set the poker down by the hearth. "I know well enough all the ways in which I've failed you. You need not remind me of them."

"I didn't mean-" I couldn't say it. I'd meant every word I'd spoken, and Mom knew it.

"I'd best check on Ethan." She crossed the room and left without another word.

"She's not not well enough to travel," I said. well enough to travel," I said.

"I know." Kate offered me another square of bread, but I shook my head. "Your mother knows, too-but that doesn't mean she has to like it, does it?" She pulled me into a hug. "Bring him home safe, Liza."

"I'll do all I can." I had no trouble speaking that truth. I tied my belt around my coat, slipped my knife into its sheath, and hefted the pack onto my shoulders. My foot nudged something on the floor-the leather tie Matthew used to pull his hair back. It still smelled faintly of wolf and smoke. I knotted it around my wrist.

Kate followed me to the door. Outside, flurries fell from the predawn sky. I stopped at my house to get my bow and a quiver of arrows. The smoke was gone, but its stench lingered as I climbed the stairs.

Mom had lied again: she hadn't gone to Ethan after all. She sat in her room, holding Caleb's silver-plated leaf. At the sound of my steps, she walked into the hall and silently offered it to me.

I shook my head. That leaf had played some small role in whatever had happened between Mom and Caleb. It had nothing to do with me.

"Caleb told me once this would protect me in dark forests." Mom seemed pale in the thin morning light. "I'd keep you out of the dark entirely if I could, but as you like to remind me, I have precious little power to do that. Let me do this much."

I didn't stop Mom as she draped the leaf over my head. "I won't force you to struggle with thanking me," she said, "or with saying anything else you don't mean. Just come back safely. We'll talk then."

I fled into my room, tucking the leaf beneath my s.h.i.+rt as Mom's footsteps descended the stairs behind me. I tied my bow and quiver to my pack, and I took a map I'd copied, too. Neither Matthew nor I had ever taken the direct route between our town and Caleb's town-Washville-but it looked clear enough, a mostly straight road broken only by a few spur trails, one of which led to Ethan's town of Clayburn.

Outside, the sky was gray, the sun below the horizon. Flurries drifted around me, and cold bit through the toes of my boots. I found Matthew's wolf tracks in the snow and followed them to the edge of town. Beyond the last of the ruined houses, his tracks turned to follow the river for a time, and a second set of tracks joined them. Small human boot prints, newer than Matthew's paw prints, wound back and forth across them. A child, and one who'd left only a few hours ago.

One of ours, or another stranger? Both sets of tracks continued alongside the river. I followed them, alert for any sound, quieting my own steps as much as the snow would allow. I scanned the forest for shadows, but there was already too much light. Like tree shadows, most human shadows preferred the dark.

Bare gray and brown trunks rose to either side of the path. A sparrow called out from a high branch, its song small and thin in the chilly morning. In one spot, the child had stopped to make snow angels; in another, he or she had scrambled down to look at something by the river and returned several dozen paces on. In places, the smaller prints were oddly shaped, as if the child had been kicking the snow.

The path veered away from the river, widening into a dirt road. Patches of brown earth and dead leaves showed through where the snow had melted, along with chunks of broken black rock from Before. I kept walking, settling into the relaxed awareness I used on the hunt. Other paths branched off the one I followed, but the prints continued toward Washville as the hours pa.s.sed and morning gave way to afternoon.

A woodp.e.c.k.e.r rapped a tree, digging for beetles. The sound echoed through the forest. I stopped, scanning the trees for the bird's red head feathers. Woodp.e.c.k.e.rs made little distinction between wood and flesh and would peck through human skin in their search for food. The bird was a ways behind me, though, and seemed focused on its tree; for now it posed little threat. I started walking again, then stopped and looked back.

There was an extra set of prints in the snow that hadn't been there before, beside the child's prints and Matthew's and mine. Only a few yards away, the new prints turned toward the forest. I put my hand to my knife's hilt and retraced my steps. I heard no one, but the prints in the snow couldn't lie. Whoever had followed me, his or her steps made no sound. The only people I knew who could walk that quietly were Karin and Caleb and- "Johnny, get out here. Now." I kept my voice low, not wanting to attract the woodp.e.c.k.e.r's attention.

Someone coughed softly behind me. I spun around, drawing my knife and taking a step back as I did. Johnny stood there, grinning. "You are are predictable, Liza." predictable, Liza."

I closed the distance between us without lowering my blade. "I told you not to do that."

Johnny shrugged and hunched down in his jacket. His knife hung from a belt underneath it. "You also told me to reveal myself."

I sheathed my knife and stalked past him. "Go home." Surely he had better things to do than make trouble here.

I didn't hear him following, but I saw, this time, when Johnny came up beside me. "Funny thing-I'm actually heading the same way you are today."

"Hilarious." A dragonfly thrummed ahead of us down the road, clutching a firefly between its legs. The dragonfly's wings shone green, while the firefly pulsed a colder yellow. "Brianna won't be happy to find you missing."

"And you're supposed to be so good at paying attention." Johnny slipped out of sight between one breath and the next. "Anyone can tell it's a relief to my mom when she can't see me. My magic makes things easier for her."

The firefly s.h.i.+mmered. Its yellow light licked the air and caught the dragonfly's veined wings, running along them like liquid fire. The larger insect quivered. There was a small, bright flash, and then the dragonfly dissolved into lacy ash.

The firefly flew off, still glowing. I focused on the path and Matthew's tracks. If Johnny chose to go walkabout, that was no concern of mine. I'd waste no more breath on it.

The snow grew softer and wetter, and the brown patches of dirt and leaves grew more frequent. As the afternoon temperature edged above freezing, I put my gloves and hat into my pockets. Clouds thickened around me, and a crow's harsh caw cut the air. I scanned the forest but saw no sign of the black birds. Crows blended readily into the dull winter trees, as if they had stalking magic of their own.

The crow called out again. Crows were scavengers, with little skill for bringing down prey, but they'd been known to peck out the eyes of live animals from time to time. I came to another spur path, the one that led to Clayburn. Matthew's wolf prints and the child's boot prints both turned onto that narrower trail. Matthew had stopped running. His steps were more deliberate, rear paws placed carefully into the tracks left by front ones, as if something had made him cautious. Beside his prints, the child's showed no such hesitation.

I moved my hand to my knife as I followed them, knowing that Matthew wouldn't have left the road without cause. Gray ash dusted the snow. A burned smell crept into the air, with a cooked-meat edge that reminded me of Ethan's burns. Matthew would have smelled it sooner than I did. Had he gone to investigate? I slowed my steps. I hoped that if Johnny was still here, he was being careful, too.

A shard of white bone poked through a patch of snow. More bones lay exposed against brown earth, burned flesh clinging to them. Human bones: a thigh, a shattered kneecap, two fingers. My hand tightened around the knife's hilt. The bones were too small to have come from adults.

I heard Johnny draw breath between his teeth, though I still couldn't see him. More burned bones littered the path and forest as I walked on, most already picked over by scavenging birds or dogs. I gagged on the scent of dead flesh. Had Ethan's magic killed them, just as it had killed Ben? Had I made a mistake, leaving Mom and Kate and the Afters to watch over Ethan without me?

Matthew's prints grew deeper, as if he'd stopped entirely. A second set of prints-adult-sized and barely breaking the snow-appeared, and wolf and human continued on together, while the child's newer prints followed. Why hadn't Matthew turned back? There was nothing he could do here, and he'd wasted time Ethan might not have.

In the distance, a child spoke softly. Around a bend, the path gave way to a churned-up mess of ash and bone and mud. Kyle knelt in the muck, talking to a bird perched on a child's skull, a sc.r.a.p of flesh dangling from its beak.

Johnny ran past me to kneel beside his brother. Kyle looked up at him, then turned back to the bird. A slick of the younger boy's hair stuck up, because of course he'd forgotten his hat.

"He's hungry." Kyle's face was smudged with mud and ash. "It's not the bird's fault that he's hungry."

"I know." The gentleness in Johnny's voice surprised me. "You ready to come home, kid?"

Kyle didn't answer.

"You went after him," I said to the older boy.

Johnny didn't look away from his brother. "Somebody had to."

A wind picked up, blowing ash toward us. The crow looked up from the skull, which was missing its two front teeth.

"Go away," I commanded the bird. With an angry rustling of feathers, it flew to a high branch that hung over the path. I commanded the bird. With an angry rustling of feathers, it flew to a high branch that hung over the path.

"He's not happy." Kyle wiped his face on his sleeve, smearing ash across his nose. He wasn't wearing gloves, either.

I crouched by his other side. "Kyle, what are you doing here?"

"Running away," he said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Third time this month," Johnny muttered. "And the farthest he's managed to get yet." He reached for Kyle's hand, but Kyle stuck out his lower lip and shook his head. Could I use my magic to send him all the way home?

The crow cawed from its branch. "Look out!" Kyle yelled.

Johnny and I grabbed our knives as other crows answered from the trees all around us. Wing beats pounded the air as the birds attacked.

My blade grazed a black wing. A sharp claw sc.r.a.ped my cheek. "Go away!" "Go away!" I commanded. I commanded.

"Go 'way, go 'way, go 'way!" Kyle echoed.

"Get down!" Johnny shouted at him.

My blade drew blood this time, and a crow dropped to the ground. The others whirled and took to the sky. I stepped back, panting, as the birds became black specks against gray clouds. How hungry did they have to be to attack us all at once?

"I told them. them." Kyle lifted his chin.

I sheathed my knife. Just then I didn't care who Kyle thought had sent the birds away, as long as they were gone.

Johnny grabbed his brother's hand. "Time to go, kid. I mean it."

Kyle shook his head. I wiped blood from my cheek and looked around, scanning the trees. If more crows lurked there, they blended with bark and branch as well as before. Sunlight forced its way through the clouds, reflecting off something s.h.i.+ny at my feet. A child's silver bracelet, with dangling charms: a heart, a key, a cat. I reached for it.

The bracelet shone brighter, too bright for the gray afternoon. Silver light filled my sight and I saw- A girl my age with long clear hair standing on the trail, where charred flesh yet clung to the bones around her. She gazed at a woman with hair just as clear bound up in a glimmering net. "I pa.s.sed your test," the girl said, but the woman frowned, disapproval clear in her silver eyes. "Tell me whether any escaped this time," the woman said, "before you speak of success-"

Karin, looking up at the same woman, speaking the same words: "I pa.s.sed your test." Only they stood in a deep green forest, and the woman smiled in response. Karin lifted her chin, pride plain enough in her bright eyes- An elbow jabbed my side, and Johnny hissed under his breath. My fingers closed around the bracelet as the visions fled. A girl stood in front of me, the clear-haired girl I'd just seen-the same girl who'd watched a town burn with Ethan by her side.