Doctor Who_ Ultimate Treasure Part 8

CHAPTER 8.

THE WOOD OF LIES.

Peri found it hard to sleep that night.

Of course there was no problem about accommodation room on board the TARDIS, but she was still conscious of their two unexpected guests and the unknown quant.i.ties they represented.

Just who really was Falstaff and why did he maintain the charade so relentlessly? Would Jaharnus really arrest them once the quest was over? For that matter, would she accompany them or stay to keep watch on the s.h.i.+ps? And then of course there was the treasure hunt itself. The very idea that she was actually going on one the next day seemed incredible, and pa.s.sages from Stevenson's Treasure Island kept insinuating themselves into her confused thoughts, until eventually they became part of her uneasy dreams.

She woke in the early hours, local time, feeling as though she had hardly slept at all. It took five minutes under an alternately hot and cold shower before she felt reasonably alert. Then she went to choose some clothes for the forthcoming expedition.

Nothing she had bought in Astroville would be suitable, and, besides, it was all too good to risk spoiling.

The wardrobe room was vast, fading away into dark shadows on all sides, and filled with row upon row of costumes representing every age and style Earth had ever produced, plus some whose origins she could only guess at. Bearing in mind Gelsandor's mild climate, she chose a loose cord s.h.i.+rt and thigh-length shorts, knee-high woollen socks, and stout but supple walking boots. To this she added a hooded cape in case the weather turned. She then dialled up a coffee and sandwich from the food synthesiser and went along to the console room.

The Doctor, who she was not sure ever slept, had four backpacks complete with bedrolls and walkers' staffs already lined up along one wall. He himself had made no obvious concessions in his own costume to their forthcoming venture, apart from changing into walking boots similar to hers.

'Do you think it's going to take us that long?' she asked, examining the well-stocked packs.

'Shalvis has been careful not to specify any likely duration for the journey, but I'd be most surprised if Rovan's treasure was less than a day's march from here. Reaching it's meant to be a challenge after all.'

'I see we're going to have company along the way.'

'Inspector Jaharnus will be accompanying us,' the Doctor confirmed. 'I believe she's decided that way she can best keep an eye on both us and Qwaid and company.'

'You don't reckon she's interested in the treasure?'

'No, I think her sense of duty is far too strong for that. At least, at the moment.'

'Why should it change?'

'Your own country helped make the expression "gold fever"

famous in the nineteenth century. The prospect of suddenly acquiring vast wealth can do strange things to otherwise normal and well-balanced beings.'

'You reckon some of us are going to start gibbering, do you Doctor? I hope you don't think it's going to happen to me.'

'I trust not, Peri.' he said with altogether too much gravity. She changed the subject.

'And how's Falstaff making out? I see he's coming to.'

'Yes. He's spent half the night regaling us with his heroic deeds in what he claims are similar circ.u.mstances.'

'But underneath he's really scared sick, isn't he?'

'I should say that was an accurate a.s.sessment of his state of mind, but for some reason he's decided to try to live up to his boasts this time, which is not really in character. Well, we shall see.' He looked at her sombrely. 'Are you sure you still want to come yourself? Despite the circ.u.mstances, this is not a game.

'You might get hurt.'

'For that matter, Doctor, why are you going? You sure don't need the money.'

A distant look came into his eyes, as though he was staring out into infinity. 'Perhaps somewhere it's expected of me,' he replied obliquely. 'And of course, I do have this insatiable sense of curiosity.'

The other s.p.a.cecraft were parked - if that was the appropriate expression, Peri thought - in three separate clearings in the park like wood within half a mile of the TARDIS. The various parties rendezvoused at a confluence of pathways approximately midway between them, just as the morning sun caught the higher branches of the trees and the dew was still on the gra.s.s. Each party exchanged uncertain glances encompa.s.sing varying degrees of hostility. Brockwell smiled at her but his companions seemed almost aloof. The three crooks, she noticed, were laden down with backpacks, multipocketed belts, bush knives and side arms. The rhinoceros-like one, Drorgon, also carried something resembling a slender missile launcher slung across his back.

Shalvis was waiting for them, with Dynes by her side. As they approached three identical DAVE drones swooped towards them to record their arrival, while one hovered expectantly over Dynes's shoulder. Drorgon growled and took a swipe at a DAVE that ventured too close to him, but the tiny device bobbed agilely out of his reach.

Shalvis spoke. 'I must ask you all to confirm you are doing this of your own free will, knowing that the way ahead is dangerous and your lives are at risk. Are you all resolved to go on?'

They all nodded. 'Yes, yes, get on with it,' Thorrin said impatiently.

'Then you must begin by choosing the best route through these woods. There are signs you can follow but they will always lie. If you meet any of our people you can ask them for guidance, but they may not speak the truth about which direction to take, though they will remain truthful about everything else.'

'Excuse me,' said Willis Brockwell diffidently, but I thought you told us yesterday that your kind never lied?'

'But I have just told you that you may be misinformed, so it is not a fundamental deception.'

'But that's not fair,' Peri exclaimed.

'We do not believe Rovan intended the way to be either fair or easy, Perpugilliam Brown,' she replied, making Peri feel as though she was about eight years old and had just said something foolish in school cla.s.s. 'If you apply your reason you will be able to choose the quickest path through the woods.' She glanced at Qwaid's party. 'You may also win through to the next stage by simple perseverance, of course, but in any case you must all keep to the paths if you wish to remain safe.'

'Safe from what?' Jaharnus asked.

'That you will find out. Are there any further questions?'

'Can we use our s.h.i.+p?' Qwaid asked.

'You may operate it now, but not to aid your journey or avoid any obstacles until you have reached the treasure.'

Dynes cut into the thoughtful silence that followed. 'Has anyone any words for the viewing public before you set out on this historic quest?'

'If you publish anything scurrilous or defamatory about myself or my niece I shall sue,' the Marquis said simply.

'Keep those things away from us,' Qwaid warned him, glowering at the camera drones, 'unless you want them turned into sc.r.a.p.'

The Doctor tipped his hat politely but said nothing.

Peri shook her head, unable to cope with mad reporters at that moment and just wis.h.i.+ng they could get started.

Falstaff swelled proudly. 'I do not embark upon this perilous way for personal gain, but to raise funds for a good and n.o.ble cause in a far-off land I may not mention...'

As he continued in the same manner, Peri shrugged helplessly at the Doctor, who smiled back.

'Be quiet you fool, and let us get started.' Thorrin snapped, interrupting Falstaff's fantasy.

'Do not let your words run so shrill, sir,' Falstaff replied easily, 'lest by their tone you reveal your fears and alarm the womenfolk.'

As Thorrin gaped back at him incredulously, Shalvis pointed a slender hand down a particular path leading off through the trees that was a little broader than the others. 'That is the beginning of the trail that leads to Rovan's treasure.'

They set off, each party trying not to mingle with the others, followed by a flock of DAVEs that glided after them at a discreet distance.

The woods on either side of the path grew thickly, with many broad-leaved bushes, trailing wisps of moss, and hanging vines filling in the s.p.a.ces between the lower tree branches and the ground. It reduced visibility to a few yards on either side, making them feel uncomfortably enclosed. Peri s.h.i.+vered. The peaceful beauty of the woods around the TARDIS's landing site seemed to have evaporated within the s.p.a.ce of a few paces. Was this natural, or more of the Gelsandorans' mind tricks?

The first junction they came to was unmarked by any sign.

Four paths diverged from it, curving gently away into the woods.

Almost gratefully the three parties separated, each taking a different path by unspoken consent. Dynes's drones followed them, one to each party.

The TARDIS party had walked perhaps a hundred yards, when the new path forked. At the apex of the fork was a neat white-painted post bearing two wooden boards with arrow-tapered ends. Peri thought they wouldn't have looked out of place on a country road, apart from the legends they bore. The one indicating left said WHITE PYRAMID, while the other to the right was ROVAN'S TREASURE.

'Ah, this is one of the lying signs of which Mistress Shalvis warned us,' said Falstaff.

'I didn't think she meant it literally,' said Jaharnus.

The Doctor was smiling. 'Well, at least it's a simple problem to start with, a.s.suming we take the deception at face value, and there are no genuine signs among the false ones to further confuse matters.'

'That was too easy,' said Peri, as they took the left path.

'I doubt if they'll remain that way,' the Doctor warned her.

Thorrin's party had arrived at a fork in the path as well. Their sign showed that the treasure lay to the left, but the other path was unmarked. Arnella saw Thorrin glance at it for a moment almost contemptuously, then stride ahead down the right-hand path.

Qwaid, Gribbs, and Drorgon had arrived at a T-junction. On either side the paths curved rapidly away out of sight. Both paths, according to the sign, led to the treasure.

'So, if they're both false, that means neither way is the right one,' said Gribbs.

'Yeah, well maybe that's what they want us to think,' said Qwaid. 'Suppose it's a double-cross? Come on.'

Both paths terminated in dead ends. They had to retrace their footsteps to the original unmarked divergence of the main track and set off down a fresh path.

'Right, so I've got the idea of how it works now,' said Qwaid, trying to sound easy as they hurried along. 'I had to find out, you see, so we don't go really wrong later.'

Gribbs and Drorgon said nothing.

After negotiating several simple junctions without difficulty, the TARDIS party came to a point where four paths met. Here the sign informed them that the pyramid was to the left, and the woods were to the right. The way ahead was unmarked. The woods!' Peri exclaimed. But we're in the woods already. And where's the unmarked path lead to?'

'Yes, the choices have become more complex; agreed the Doctor. 'All we can be certain of, according to Shalvis, is that each sign cannot indicate the thing it purports to. Therefore the pyramid cannot be to the left, the woods alone are not to the right, and anything might be straight ahead - at least as far as the next junction. The correct path might be any of them, since none mention the treasure and so can definitely be excluded.

There is no simple answer. But logically the unmarked path should at least lead to another signpost, since it cannot actually lead to nothing. Let's try that.

Soon they reached another junction with just two paths leading from it. However, the sign was of a different kind. To the left it said NOT THIS WAY, while to the right it said DON'T FOLLOW THE OTHER SIGN.

'What is this - something from Alice in Wonderland?' Peri said.

'The two cancel each other out,' Jaharnus observed, becoming interested in the puzzle despite her professional preoccupations.

'They don't tell us anything.'

'Not quite,' said the Doctor. 'The right-hand sign does not mention a direction but merely the other half of the sign, so it's actually self-referential. I think we should treat it as a double negative.'

They proceeded to the left.

'What if the next sign says "Ignore last sign"?' Peri asked.

Arnella stared at a sign that said THIS WAY to the left, and FOLLOW THE OTHER SIGN to the right.

Thorrin fumed. 'We cannot even be sure of the solution. How deep should we a.s.sume the deception runs? Childish puzzles!'

'But you're not going to let that stop you from solving them?'

Rosscarrino asked mildly.

'What? No, no... of course not. But they are most trying.'

'Exactly. Perhaps that's the point. A lesson that we have to abide by Rovan's rules.'

Brockwell spoke up, and Arnella realised he was trying to soothe his irritable employer's ego.

'They might be deliberately insulting our intelligence and trying to get us angry in the hope that we'll make a foolish mistake. But you're not going to fall for that sort of trick, are you, Professor?'

He lowered his voice. 'And remember, all this is being recorded.'

He tilted his head at the DAVE drone hovering a few metres away.

Thorrin scowled, but then recovered himself and sniffed thoughtfully. 'Yes, you could be right, Will.' He looked at the sign again. 'Well, clearly, taken as a whole, it indicates we should go right.'

'I agree,' said the Marquis with a smile.

Arnella knew her uncle was also trying to keep Thorrin in a tolerable humour. They still needed him until they reached the treasure. After that, of course, they would need no one's charity ever again.

Eventually Qwaid called them to a halt. They were back at the junction of four paths, which they had left ten minutes before.

It had seemed to say that the central path had been the right one... or perhaps the wrong one, looked at another way. He was getting sick of neatly painted signposts.